Sideshow Alley

by KJ Sheerin

  ‘Now listen up everyone. We are tethered directly above the place where you were recruited from exactly one year ago. As from 0900 hours you will be able to go below and do as you wish, your contract with us will be up. However you have the option to come back and do it all over again if you want. Just think of it, another year of good food, free medical, hostesses and a roof over your head—plus you wouldn’t have to go back to The Rock again!’ There was a ripple of laughter from the crew.

  ‘But whatever you do, choose wisely and talk it over with your pilot. Your decision affects him also—if you re-up, he is honour bound to do so as well. We will be here until seven pm on the Sunday, local time. If for any reason you wish to return and serve on, you are most welcome. Together you have become one of the most successful fighting groups that I can remember. You have done yourselves and the Redemption proud, so think it over—and thank you,’ he said, then turned and left the mess.

  Colin moved about the mess shaking hands with fighters and pilots alike. Some he might never see again.

  Kyla joined him and when finished he turned to her and asked, ‘Are you ready to step?’

  ‘What—like this?’

  Colin shrugged, ‘Let’s go.’

  They beamed down to the tent below and the Colonel who waited there, dressed in his spruiking gear just as Colin had described. Karl and Rolf were there also, guarding the inner door.

  ‘Glad you could make it,’ the Colonel said, ‘come and take a look outside.’ He led the way between the rows of arcade games, then out of the tent flap and into the sunlight there.

  ‘This is Sideshow Alley,’ he said, waving his hand around expansively, ‘here, let me show you.’ He divested himself of his hat and cane and threw them both to Colin. ‘Look after the place, will you? No women, under-aged kids or wooden nickels,’ he yelled, as he strolled off with Kyla on his arm.

  Karl and Rolf laughed as Colin watched them go.

  One by one the fighters emerged from the back room and shook hands with Colin again before departing. Youngsters started to drift in to look at the games, so he took their money and let them play. Occasionally an older one would come by. He paid particular attention to their scores and invited the brighter prospects into the back room for a free crack at the next level. They all balked at the sight of Karl and Rolf, but he calmed them with the simple explanation that they were aliens. It usually sent them into fits of laughter. It was just the thing one would expect in Sideshow Alley.

  More fighters beamed down, some while prospective recruits operated the gun turret in the simulator, but they were all oblivious to anything except the incoming enemy projected on the dome overhead. On completion they all wanted to go on to the next level and Colin obliged them. One had a mobile phone, so he asked if he could use it while the fellow was being tested and then beamed him up before he could ask for it back.

  Kyla looked on wide-eyed at the attractions as the Colonel wandered along the alley. The constant sound of screaming floated overhead from the rides high in the air—while in the alley itself the people rushed on past them, their adrenalin levels elevated as they went from one attraction to another.

  The spruikers kept up the pressure, bombarding the passers-by with the lure of excitement from the various other attractions. They kept the crowd in a constant frenzy, like fish at feeding time, as they catered to their different senses. One tent extolled the manly art of boxing, while another, The Dance of the Seven Veils. In-between them others offered various games of skill and rides—all designed to separate the gullible crowd from their money.

  It seemed to Kyla that the Colonel had been right after all—the people in the alley appeared to be inflicted with some sort of madness and payed her scant attention in passing.

  ‘What is that smell in the air?’ she asked.

  ‘That would be the fairy floss,’ the Colonel said, stopping to buy her some of the sticky sweet confection.

  Finally they came to the end of the alley, in view of the main arena itself, where different equestrian events were in progress. Kyla looked on amazed at all she saw and realised that the Colonel was showing her around just as he would one of his own daughters. She gave his arm a squeeze. They went through pavilions full of birds and goats, including an animal nursery—the Colonel pointing them out while naming their species. She also looked at the different people and how they were dressed, particularly the women and girls.

  In the cattle pavilion she walked past huge breeding beasts on straw full of urine and dung. It was the same in the sheep pavilion next door, only with a different smell. Down around the other side of the arena were fowl and craft displays along with examples of early power sources, with stationary engines of every size, plus an array of vintage tractors through to the modern day.

  ‘It seems they still have a long way to go,’ Kyla said.

  ‘Not as long as you would think,’ the Colonel replied, ‘I’d say they are just about due for a quantum leap—and once that happens, who knows?’

  Finally they were back at the spruikers tent.

  Colin walked out to meet them, ‘So how did you go?’

  ‘Don’t worry about her, what about you?’ the Colonel replied.

  ‘I’ve got four so far.’

  ‘That’s not bad,’ the Colonel said, reclaiming his hat and cane.

  ‘She’s all yours, but I want the both of you back here to relieve me at mealtimes, okay?’

  ‘Fine,’ Colin said, then took hold of Kyla’s hand and walked off.

  ‘So what do you think of it?’ he asked.

  ‘This is a fair, isn’t it?’

  ‘We call it a show, but it’s the same thing. It only happens once a year.’

  He took out the mobile phone and showed it to her.

  ‘Where did you get it?’

  ‘One of the new recruits volunteered it,’ he said, and she laughed.

  ‘I thought I might phone home and see how things are.’

  They walked over to a quiet place near the fence where Colin punched in the number from memory and then held the phone up so they could both hear.

  The number rang three times before being answered, ‘Hello?’

  ‘Hello, is that you, Mum? It’s me, Colin.’

  The phone went quiet for a moment before the woman on the other end screamed, ‘Where the bloody hell have you been?’

  Kyla pursed her lips at the outburst.

  ‘I’m sorry Mum, me and Tiddles went out and had a bit to drink. The next thing you know, we woke up dead broke on a boat bound for Darwin and had to work our way back.’

  ‘A likely bloody story,’ the woman said. ‘You could have at least rung and told me where you were—I could have sent some money, you know.’

  ‘We didn’t want to bother you. The thing is I’m in town. I’ve got a job, but we’ll only be here a couple of days and I’d really like to see you. I’ve got a girlfriend now, her name is Kyla—I’ll put her on.’

  Kyla pouted her lips and folded her arms, ‘Girlfriend, is it?’

  Colin laughed and presented her with the phone.

  She relented and said, ‘Hello Mrs Jones, how are you?’

  ‘I’m alright—tell us a bit about yourself, luv.’

  ‘Well I met Colin a few months ago and we’ve been travelling and working together ever since.’

  ‘And where are you working now?’

  ‘We’re helping out at the local show.’

  ‘That lazy little bugger—you mean to tell me he’s only a kilometre down the road and hasn’t got time to see his own mother?’

  ‘We only just got here this morning and he’s been working already. He’s on a break at the moment. Perhaps we could come over and have dinner one night. I’d like very much to meet you.’

  ‘I’d like to meet you too, you sound nice. I don’t know how you could have hooked up with such an inconsiderate so and so. What about tomorrow at six thirty pm? That will give me time to prepare.’

  ‘That sounds f
ine, we’ll see you then,’ Kyla said, and ended the call.

  She turned to Colin and said, ‘Girlfriend?’

  ‘Relax, it’s just that I don’t want her to turn up and ask the Colonel if she could see me or my wife. So what did you think of the animals?’

  ‘They are beautiful, but I didn’t recognise any from the Verdant.’

  ‘These are the domesticated kind—the others live in the wild. You can see them at the zoo,’ he said, as they strolled back to the tent.

  The Colonel was waiting for them, ‘Just in time, Ace. You look after these good people—I’ve got one out the back.’

  Kyla looked on as the two long-haired youths sat crouched in their respective arcade games, their tongues hanging out and eyes glazed as they fired repeatedly at the challenges on the screen in front.

  ‘Whatever you do, don’t laugh,’ Colin said.

  ‘That’s how me and Tiddles must have looked only a year ago.’

  The Colonel returned with a smile on his face.

  ‘We’re going back onboard, see you at midday,’ Kyla told him.

  Once back on the Carrier she dragged Colin off to her cabin to prepare a message for her parents to inform them they were presently on Earth while the Redemption recruited more fighters. Kyla also told them that she had talked to Colin’s Mother by communicator and was due to dine with the family the next day. Then afterwards she dropped the bombshell of their marriage, plus the fact that her DNA deposit had been upgraded as well—proudly holding her hand up to show them the ring on her finger. She kissed Colin before ending the capture and they both went to the library to send it.

  They both helped out in the tent below and again in the fighters’ mess afterwards. Colin also showed the new recruits where to sleep and introduced them to the servery for food at meal times as well as the films of a night. He also returned the phone to its owner and thanked him.

  The next evening they caught a cab to Colin’s place, Kyla wondering at the smooth yet toxic ride.

  The driver looked dubiously at her green tinged flesh.

  ‘What’s wrong with the Missus?’ he asked.

  ‘Nothing, we work at the show. It’s just a food dye she wears for appearances,’ Colin answered.

  He used the same explanation on his mother when she saw Kyla for the first time.

  ‘Don’t worry, it’s all part of the show and lasts for days,’ he assured her before doing the introductions.

  ‘Kyla, this is my Mother, Sally.’ Sally shook her hand and led them through to the lounge room where Rhonda was.

  ‘Hi, Sis,’ Colin said, taking in her largess.

  ‘What happened to you?’

  ‘Don’t upset your sister. That useless layabout boyfriend of hers has knocked her up,’ Sally said.

  Colin looked over to Kyla briefly, ‘Tell me, has Tiddles been around yet?’

  ‘He was here yesterday. Rhonda answered the door. He mumbled something about you being home, but we told him we already knew. Why?’

  ‘Oh, nothing, just curious, that’s all.’

  Both Rhonda and Sally couldn’t get over Kyla’s greenness—they pored over her, running their hands over her skin until satisfied. The one thing they did agree on though, was her beauty and to die for blue eyes.

  During the meal Kyla ate only the vegetables, plus Colin gave her his as well. She constantly elbowed and nudged him, urging him to say something until at last he spoke.

  ‘Mum, when I first rang you I said that Kyla was my girlfriend.’

  Sally looked up from her plate and said, ‘She’s not?’

  ‘I knew it,’ Rhonda said, ‘she’s a fella!’

  Kyla suppressed a laugh.

  ‘No, last time I looked she was very much a woman. The thing is we got married the other day, but we want to keep it a secret from our employers. They frown upon such things.’

  Rhonda’s jaw dropped and his mother was flabbergasted at the news. When Sally finally recovered she went over and kissed Kyla and then welcomed her into the family, such as it was.

  ‘But how can you afford to do it in this day and age? How can you hope to provide for her in the future?’ she asked.

  ‘Don’t worry, it’s all been taken care of,’ Kyla assured her, and showed them the ring on her finger.

  ‘So where did you get married?’

  ‘At sea on a ship before we came here—we had the Captain marry us,’ Kyla said.

  ‘How romantic—what do you think, Rhonda?’

  Rhonda slammed her knife and fork down, ‘What the hell would I know about romance,’ she said, and stormed off.

  ‘Don’t worry about her, she’ll get over it,’ her mother said, ‘when did you say you were leaving?’

  ‘The day after tomorrow,’ Kyla told her.

  ‘Then you must come back and eat with us again before you go.’

  ‘One thing I’ve been meaning to ask, did you ever get the back lawn cut at all?’ Colin inquired.

  ‘Oh, that. It’s more like a dust bowl out there now. It hasn’t rained since you left,’ Sally replied.

  The next day the first lot of new pilots were transferred across to the Redemption and the old pilots taken off. They said goodbye to Eric and the boys after informing Eric of Rhonda’s predicament. The news didn’t surprise him—he had already resigned himself to the inevitable.

  That night Rhonda had regained her composure once more and Kyla took her imaging device with her. She took images of everyone throughout the evening and came back afterwards very happy.

  On Sunday morning they beamed down for a final look around the show.

  ‘It’s ending tonight. All the animals are being taken home,’ Colin explained.

  The number of new recruits in the mess had swelled steadily. Already some of the older fighters had started to drift back—Jimmy and Barry amongst them. Pee Wee showed up a little later.

  The Colonel smiled on seeing him, ‘Tell me, what did you come back for—the fighters or the tail?’ he asked.

  ‘Both,’ Pee Wee said, smiling.

  ‘And what about your brother, will he be back?’ Pee Wee shook his head before being beamed up.

  In the mess that evening the odd fighter and recruit alike still came through the doorway. Kyla and Colin were sitting among the remnants of the old crew and some of the new pilots when Tiddles finally made his appearance. He went over to sit with his friends and lowered his head, unable to face them in his sorrow. Kyla put a hand on his shoulder to comfort him.

  ‘Everyone—this is Tiddles!’ she informed the new pilots. They reached out eagerly to make his acquaintance and Tiddles responded, his sadness momentarily forgotten.

  ‘We’re only sorry we never met Eric,’ Pers, one of the newcomers, said.

  ‘Shit! I forgot all about him,’ Tiddles moaned.

  ‘Don’t worry, he knows—we told him,’ Kyla confirmed.

  They stayed on to survey the long-haired scruffy flotsam before them—the Zylon pilots agog that one of them could actually be their crewmate.

  ‘The last intake was exactly the same and look what they produced,’ Kyla informed them.

  An hour later the last one entered, followed closely by the Colonel, Rolf and Karl.

  ‘This should be good,’ Colin said, and watched as they approached lectern.