I fall into a cold embrace.
Chapter Thirteen
I woke confused and disgruntled. I threw the cover on the floor and took in my surroundings. He brought me back to the room he prepared for me. Then I was remembering the events that led to this… he actually put me to sleep instead of listening to me. My ears were on fire along with my face, I was so angry.
I didn’t know how long I had been asleep, nor did I have any windows to look outside—not that I would know the difference between day and night here. I hurried out of bed. “He actually made me sleep,” I spoke to myself.
The door opened. I lifted my eyes in time to see the feline butler entering. “You’re awake,” he stated.
“Where’s Grim,” I snapped. He wasn’t the one I was angry with, but he was in my path and that put him in danger of my wrath.
“He’s busy,” was his answer.
“I don’t care. I need to speak with him.” I was still in my nightgown, but I was too upset to care. He brought his hand up in front of me when I tried to walk by.
“He said you would be upset so I brought your breakfast.” Did he expect me to forgive him with food? I eyed the table of delicious goodies rolling itself in behind the butler. Bagels, pancakes, waffles, muffins, milk, juice, and five or more different types of syrups and spreads. I licked my lips. I knew this was a trick to make me forget about what happened, but my stomach still grumbled.
Oh, and it smelled so good and… and I was hungry. I sighed, long and hard.
“He said he will talk to you only when you’ve calmed down,” he added, and I shot him another glare. Poor guy—I needed to find out his name—he was getting all of my anger. I stared back at the food.
“He can’t ignore me while he has me here,” I grumbled, but I knew what I said wasn’t true. He could do whatever he wanted and if he chose to never let me see him again, I would never see him again. My stomach churned at the thought.
The butler only looked at me with curious eyes. “I guess I’m stuck here waiting in this prison,” I yelled into the room knowing that Grim was probably listening. “Don’t think pancakes with blueberries in them will settle anything between us,” I added while rolling the table to the bed and flopping down. What? I wasn’t going to let this food go to waste.
“You may leave now,” I told the butler. I saw the grin on his face as he disappeared from the room.
________
“Human,” Lincoln barged into my room while I was reading. I glared and saved my spot before closing the book.
I took a deep breath and closed my eyes. “Does no one around here—demon or otherwise—know how to say my name or knock for once?” I smiled sweetly.
“Someone’s upset.” He smiled like he was delighted in my mood. “I heard your little spat with Grim last night.”
Anyone in the castle could probably hear us. I didn’t care, though. “Woo, you have amazing hearing,” I said sarcastically. And a horse’s butt. I grinned at my own thoughts.
“So, this Ryan…” I already hated where this was going. “He was your lover and died because he was involved with you?” I changed positions on the bed to where my body faced his direction.
“I don’t think it’s any of your business.”
His smile only grew at my reluctance to tell him anything. “I feel for Grim.” I arched an eyebrow. “You should have some decency… begging him to save another man.” He shook his head.
He was only trying to get a reaction from me, but I felt my anger fizzing. “Mind your own business,” I snapped.
“You can’t only have feelings for one part of him.” His words caught my attention, and I looked back up to him. “They are one and the same, human, you can’t have one without the other.” I didn’t like how everyone automatically assumed I had no feelings for Grim. I knew how I felt, but I didn’t think I needed to explain myself to anyone.
“So, you know me, do ya’?
“There’s no denying your attraction to Killian.”
I moved off the bed and stepped in front of him. “You’re the one that told me humans and demons couldn’t be together. Why do care what I feel for either of them? Besides, Grim pretty much made it clear, once again, that I was nothing but something that needed his protection.”
“You don’t understand anything.” He looked at me with pity.
“I don’t have to listen to a horse-man trying to tell me my own feelings. I’m stuck here for now, but that doesn’t mean I won’t figure out a way protect my friend and everyone I care about.”
His eyes pierced mine. “And just what do you think Grim has been doing? Just who is the one doing the protecting?” I couldn’t say anything. “Hmm?” With that, he turned and left the room.
_________
I fanned my page as I flipped to the next page. My whole body was heated as I read, and I would feel embarrassed about what I was reading if it wasn’t for the fact that I was so engrossed by it. This wasn’t romance; this was demon porn. I was appalled by some of what I had read, but I couldn’t stop reading.
I read a lot of erotica, but these books were nothing like anything I had read before. Sure, I was a virgin. But in my case, it was like saying my body was innocent yet my mind was corrupted with filthiness.
I spent the day reading when I should have been causing a ruckus. I tended to get trapped inside a book once I started reading one—especially something fascinating—and couldn’t stop until I had it finished. That was definitely the case with this one. My neck was cramped, and I was hungry by the time I finally sat the book down.
I stood up and stretched, deciding I had stayed cooped up in this room long enough. I was hungry and thirsty, and the butler hadn’t brought anything since this morning. I grabbed a pair of tennis shoes and put them on. I was sure to look ridiculous wearing this beautiful dress with tennis shoes, but it beat wearing heels. This country girl wasn’t used to all the sparkle and beauty these dresses held. Although I had been flattered to get them, I was now realizing they weren’t me.
The ballroom was quiet and empty. More like, the whole castle was creepy quiet. I tiptoed—like I was going to get in trouble—toward the double doors that led to the dining room. The kitchen had to be next to it. The doors creaked loudly and I flinched, waiting several long seconds to make sure no one was going to appear and went on in. I was right, the kitchen was the next door in the dining room.
When I realized I was still tiptoeing, I felt foolish and stopped. Why did I need to sneak around? If I was stuck here in the castle, I wasn’t going to limit myself to a bedroom.
I gasped. My mom would kill for this kitchen. I missed her and Alex. I prayed time really was different between here and there. I hated to imagine the worry my mom would be feeling if she thought I was missing. I couldn’t stay here much longer. I had to make them understand that.
But I shoved those thoughts away for now and focused on the kitchen. It was like it came from one of those catalogs Mom gets in the mail. The floor was wooden or wood-like, I couldn’t tell if it was made to look like it or if it actually was. The kitchen felt oddly country—making it seem out of place with the rest of the castle. It didn’t have the medieval-dark vibe like everything else.
The fridge was built into a stone wall, but the fridge itself had a wooden appearance. There was more than one stove and a beautiful counter set up with all kinds of kitchen appliances.
I went to the fridge and opened it. I grabbed a water and twisted the cap off. The door opened and I froze, hidden behind the fridge door. I wanted to smack myself for getting so wound up over someone coming into the kitchen. I wasn’t doing anything wrong. I closed the door. “I was getting something to drink,” I said before I looked over to see who it was that entered. “Killian.”
His face went from shock to horror as if he was downright terrified to see me. “I shouldn’t have come downstairs.” His voice was hoarse and he still looked terrible. I stepped closer and he moved back. He turned to leave.
“Wait,” I said quickly. He stopped and took a deep breath, but didn’t turn around. Now that I told him to wait, I wasn’t sure what to say. We were supposed to be avoiding each other. “Uh… how are you feeling?”
He turned his head enough to give me a tight smile. “I’m fine.” He swayed and I moved to help him but he steadied himself before I could. “Everything will go back to normal and for you having to stay here, I’m sorry.” Something was off. The way he spoke scared me.
“Are you really sick? You’re acting weird.”
“I will be perfectly fine soon enough.” He paused and so did my breathing. “Being like this has made me realize things I couldn’t before.” It didn’t help that I was looking at his back as he spoke. It made me nervous and afraid of things he could say with his back turned. “I was momentarily confused about some things, but I won’t be anymore. You don’t belong here—I realize that and everything will go back to normal for you in time.”
“My life will never be normal,” I told him ignoring the pinpricks of fear in my heart.
“We will make it happen.” He sounded determined, but he also sounded detached and without emotion. I couldn’t tell what he felt.
“Will you look at me when you’re talking?” I asked.
“It’s already been too long to be around you. It’s not safe for you.” He opened the door and he stumbled forward. “We can finish our conversation two nights from now.” And he left.
I closed my eyes and focused on numbers. On counting, over and over until the tears no longer wanted to fall. My heart twisted like it was being ripped out. Once again, what could have happened between us was coming to end before it was given the chance.
I made the mistake of pushing him away the first time, but it wasn’t me this time. I was ready to be honest about my feelings, but I knew exactly what this conversation meant. We couldn’t be together. I didn’t belong here. Even with the Vessel, I was still human. There was nothing that could change that. Demons and humans really couldn’t be?
I never thought to wonder that Grim and Killian might be immortal…
Reality was closing in.
Chapter Fourteen
Grim stormed into my room that night as I was cramming a cookie in my mouth. I was ignoring my problems by eating and reading demon porn. The bed was covered in candy wrappers, empty plates, and books. I shoved them all to the side of the bed as if that would make the mess look any better.
He was a mass of black so I knew whatever this was about wasn’t good. “Do you realize what danger you put yourself in today?” he shouted as he entered the room, shoulders tensed and his black t-shirt heaving in and out with his anger. Did skeletons breathe or was it entirely anger?
“Huh?” The entire cookie I crammed in my mouth was still there and my ‘huh’ sounded so muffled that even I couldn’t understand it. Why did I have to eat when I was stressed? I kicked a wrapper at my foot in a hurry. Good thing I was dumped—rejected before I even got the chance to confess—or else I might have cared that my bed was a pigsty. I needed another cookie, but my stomach was already in protest with everything I had already eaten.
“You met with Killian,” he accused. “Do you know what could have happened if you were around him when his powers slipped?” He rubbed his skull in frustration.
“I did not meet him!” I defended myself. “I bumped into him when I went to the kitchen, there’s a difference.” I gave him a dirty look—determined to shoot him with laser beams… if only I could. But my evil eye had to be impressive regardless.
He just stood there for several seconds. “That’s not the point,” he argued.
I laughed. “Really? I think it is if I’m going to get yelled at for something that wasn’t my fault. I was thirsty, hungry, and bored of this room!” I took a deep breath. “And being seduced is at the bottom of my list of worst things that can happen to me.”
He gave me a hard look. “Don’t leave this room,” he ordered.
“Grim, I am not a prisoner. I won’t stay in here,” I spoke calmly.
“It’s for your protection.” I snorted, and he tilted his head like he couldn’t believe my attitude. “It’s only for one more night after this one,” he insisted. I looked down. That was when they planned to merge again, wasn’t it?
“Fine.” I pretended to be okay with it.
He gave me another long look. “That’s it?”
“Yeah. Go,” I told him.
“Very well.” He sighed, suddenly looking reluctant.
I watched him walk out. He snapped his fingers just as he left from the doorway. The mess I made went missing on the bed. All my plates, wrappers, and crumbles—it all disappeared. That only aggravated me more and my cheeks heated. I was about to blow; I just knew it. “I was going to clean it myself,” I yelled.
I glared at the door. There was no way I was staying caged in this room.
So, obviously, I wasn’t taking Grim or Killian’s rejection well because the next morning I woke up extremely angry. I couldn’t stand them trying to dictate my life. I didn’t want to be a burden to them. I wanted to be someone that mattered but that didn’t seem to be the case. Because I was a burden.
A burden that didn’t listen and would be sure to cause a problem again.
I went on to make things worse. I slipped on another one of the fancy—too gorgeous for me dresses—and some tennis shoes and decided to sneak out. I felt suffocated but then realized that I could just go outside and I would be safe from Killian’s sex-oozing fumes. Besides, I had made a friend here. Sky, and I wanted to see her.
I stepped out of my room and the secret door faded back into the wall. The castle was void of life, but I still moved around cautiously. Grim might not always be next to me, but there was always that sense that he knew where I was and what I was doing. I ran for the huge double doors that led outside, heartbeat pounding in my ears and throat as the adrenaline and fear of getting caught increased.
I was beyond relieved and excited when I opened one of the doors and slipped out. I closed it back with a smile and took in the fresh air. And once again, I was taken in by the beauty and strangeness of this place. This place was maddening and unreal. It made me wonder if the Underworld was this breathtaking. Somehow, I doubted it. Fear’s cave had been nothing like this.
The thunderous roars of the dragons calling to one another above me caught my interest. I looked up as they flew over me. My smile only grew when I noticed Sky with them. Had they accepted her? Rixen was in the front, but his neck snapped toward the back as he let himself slow and fall toward the back of the group where Sky was. When she noticed him approaching, she pinned her wings back and sped downward—away from him.
Sky was avoiding her leader. It made me curious. I was fascinated, so much that I wished I could speak and understand their language. They were getting too far away. I started running to keep up, caught up in the moment watching them.
The sky held no sun in the day, it made me wonder if there was no moon at night? Or did it ever change? I would have to find out. My lungs were burning at this point and I was seriously out of shape. I was reaching the end of the pavement and grew desperate that I would lose sight of them. I brought my hands in the air, waving them around. “Sky!”
Sky turned and spotted me running after her. She swooped back gracefully and I slowed down to wait for her to come to me. She was agile and beautiful as she landed before me, and I had the biggest grin. I bent over to catch my breath. Sweat was dampening my skin and I didn’t even run that far. All those sweets I loved to eat were sure to be the problem… and this humid heat.
“Sky,” I panted sounding winded.
Her hair was slicked back along with her ears with sweat. Her eyes were gentle as she approached. I brought my hand up to rub along her scales. She gave me a purr in response and shook her entire body at me. “I see you found your place.” Of course, she couldn’t answer me, but her eyes were filled with knowledge and I knew she listened to every word
I said. “I’m only more confused,” I admitted to her.
In response, she rubbed her nose into my palm. Rixen flew at a distance, tail swaying as he watched us above. I arched an eyebrow. “Looks like you have problems of your own.” Her head turned toward her leader. I felt like it was a lover’s quarrel… almost like Rixen was doing the chasing.
“Is your heart in turmoil too?” She purred in response.
“Melanie!” I recognized Lincoln’s voice and turned around to see him running, all four hooves coming at me fast pace. He looked afraid and possibly annoyed. Okay, possible—probably very annoyed.
I swore and looked back to Sky. Her eyes followed the centaur before she gazed back at me. “A girl can’t catch a break.” Sky swiveled around and gave her back to me. She bent down and I hurried to climb onto her. She brought her tail around to help push me up and on her. I grabbed a handful of her mane to hold on to. She wasted no time getting us in the air.
I laughed when I heard my name being called again. I knew I probably wouldn’t get far. Grim was sure to come get me… but I would relish the moment.
Sky wasted no time. She took us through the sky and showed me everything. She brought us to a mountain that held caves all over it. Dragons poured in and out of them. This was their home. I smiled and rubbed my hand over her neck to let her know I appreciated what she had just shown me. She took me over the rainbow-colored trees and finally dived down into them. All the colors looked unreal in the woods as she flew us through it. She kept a slow pace to dodge the trees. I wouldn’t have believed such a place existed if I wasn’t right here looking at it all, breathing it in.
For a moment, I imagined what it would feel like to be a dragon. Just the thought left me feeling alive and free. Nothing but the roar of the wind in my ears as she picked up speed through the trees. I smiled and brought my hands out to my sides. I wanted to touch everything in these woods—and I would as soon as we landed. The trees looked soft-like, almost like they might feel like cotton candy. Vines trailed up them. The grass glowed like the trees.
'Til Grim's Light (A Grim Awakening Book 2) Page 14