Hawk in the Rowan

by Sam Burns

“Promise.”

  She didn’t say anything else, just cried on him for a while. He rocked back and forth, humming a lullaby his mother used to sing to him when he was a kid.

  After a few minutes, her breathing evened out, and the tension went out of her, so he carried her back over to where Jayden was sleeping under the coat. He pulled up the edge and slipped her in next to the boy, who wound around her in his sleep like a little octopus.

  “That was well done,” Vera whispered from the other side of the fire. “You’re better with them than you think you are.”

  He rolled his eyes. “I don’t think so.”

  “I know, that’s my point. You’re scared of them because you think you’ll do or say the wrong thing. But the thing that gives you trouble with adults also makes you perfect for kids.” She scooted closer to the fire and put another handful of twigs on it. The pile caught his eye; it was almost gone.

  “What’s that?” he asked, trying not to think about the fire.

  “The truth. Sometimes you have to find the right way to put it, but what they always want is the truth. And that’s all you have to give.” She looked at the remaining twigs and sighed. “I meant to wake you before it got this low, but for some reason, it felt like a bad idea.”

  “It was. I don’t know if I got through to Wade, but I might have. It was close.” He leaned over and took the bottle of water, uncapping it and taking just enough to wet his mouth. “And maybe I’m not the worst with kids, but that doesn’t mean I want to run out and adopt a set.”

  She laughed to herself for a moment before answering. “I don’t think they come in sets, but either way, that seems reasonable. If you don’t want children, you don’t have to have them. If you want them later, you can do that too. There aren’t rules about it.”

  He looked over at the kids to make sure they were still asleep, then stuck his hands out to the edge of the line he’d drawn, to get them as close as possible to the fire. “But how can I expect that of Wade?”

  “Children, or patience while you figure things out?”

  “He wants . . . I don’t know, he’s just not—” He broke off and sighed. He wasn’t sure if the problem was that he couldn’t form a complete thought, or if he was struggling to find the truth. The only truth he could know without his powers kicking in was his own, so he switched to that. “I’m afraid I’m not going to be enough. He doesn’t press me on it, but he’s got our relationship built up in his head as this whole meant-to-be, ‘mates’ thing, and I’m afraid I’m not what he really wants.”

  “Maybe you should let him tell you what he wants.”

  “But he doesn’t!” The words almost exploded out of him in frustration, and he had to turn and check again that he hadn’t woken the kids. It was impressive that they’d stayed asleep; they might be able to sleep through anything. He turned back to Vera, who was waiting patiently for him to continue. “He doesn’t tell me what he wants. He says he wants to plan our future, but he’s not willing to tell me what that is. And he’s so traditional, I keep thinking he wants a house and two kids and a dog, and I’m not that kind of guy. I like my apartment, and I don’t need kids, and I’ve already got a wolf.”

  She was smiling again, eyes twinkling and expression amused. He glared at her, but her grin didn’t budge. “You’ve never thought maybe he likes your apartment too? That he doesn’t have an opinion on kids and dogs? Maybe he doesn’t want to tell you what he wants because the important thing to him is that you’re happy.”

  “That’s silly. Everyone wants something.”

  “He wants you. Everyone in town who ever talks to him knows that. Even in the post office, he’s always talking about you.”

  Devon blushed and stared at the fire. “I’ve been shoving him away. I’m terrified of the future. What if I turn into my mother? What if I want different things than him? What if I run away, like I always do?”

  Vera reached out for the water bottle and took a sip, then set it back between them. She was quiet for long enough that he started to think she wasn’t going to respond. Finally, she spoke without looking up at him. “I think you need to talk to him about this. It’s been a long time, and I still wonder, sometimes, what if I hadn’t been so timid and asked my husband to think of his family before politics? I doubt he would have changed, but at least I would have done something. That’s what I regret most in my entire life. Staying quiet when I should have spoken up.”

  He stared at her, completely unable to form a response.

  After a while, she chuckled. “Did I break you?”

  “No, I just never would have considered that.” He sighed and leaned back, bracing himself on his hands. “I don’t regret anything I’ve done till now. Maybe I wish I’d come back sooner, but I don’t regret the life I had outside Rowan Harbor.”

  “But?”

  “But I would regret running away now. I don’t even have to do it to know that. I feel horrible every time I think about it.” That was the difference, he realized, between his old urges to run and the ones he’d been having recently.

  In the past, moving on hadn’t been emotional. He hadn’t been frightened of staying in one place, just of the effect he would have on people if he did. Now, he wasn’t afraid of the effect he would have on Wade; he was only afraid Wade would get sick of him. He had the itch to run like before, but unlike then, when it was purely a neutral instinct he trusted, now it made him sick when he thought about abandoning Rowan Harbor.

  On the other hand, the thought of being stuck made him feel ill too. Eventually Wade would realize Devon wasn’t the ideal mate he deserved. Everything Devon had, had been given to him. Everything Wade had, he’d worked for.

  “You look like you’re thinking too hard.” Vera gave a yawn that broke up the last of her words.

  Devon realized it must be later than he’d assumed. He pulled out his phone to check the time. It was two in the morning. “Vera, you let me sleep half the night. You need rest too.”

  She gave a half-hearted shrug. “Maybe, but if we’re going to get out of this alive, it’s going to be because of you. We needed you well rested. And like I said before, I had a feeling I should leave you be.”

  “That’s—” He had been putting his phone back in his pocket, but stopped and whipped it back out. It had buzzed in his hand. It had a connection. The messages had sent. He unlocked it, and a glut of messages flashed across the screen. He had dozens of voicemails and texts, but the most recent was from Wade, just two words.

  We’re coming.

  He could have cried, he was so relieved. “They’re coming. They know where we are, and they’re coming.”

  Vera took a deep breath and nodded. A tear rolled down her cheek, and she just kept nodding for a minute.

  Devon slid around the fire and grabbed her hand. “We’re going to be okay. The kids are going to be okay. You saved them.”

  She leaned against him. “I was starting to think . . . You know.”

  “Yeah, I do.”

  After a long silence, she said, “You know, if we’re going to live, it means you have to talk to your boyfriend.”

  “I hate you a little bit for saying that.”

  She laughed.

  6

  Found

  Neither of them could go to sleep after that. They let the kids continue; there was nothing they could do other than worry if they were awake, and they had been through enough.

  He took the branch he’d set aside, and poked the pointy end into the fire, just far enough to make sure it would be smoldering.

  “You’re going to try to help them, aren’t you?” Vera asked him as they sat there together. “I’m not sure that’s a good idea.”

  “It’s probably not,” he agreed. “But how could I let them fight to save our lives and not help them? Plus, we don’t know who’s coming or whether they’ll know how to fight a troll.”

  Vera gave him a sardonic smile and rolled her eyes. “You told Wade there was a troll in your messag
e?”

  “Yeah.”

  “They’ll be prepared. I have no doubt Wade Hunter can take down a troll threatening his love. If it weren’t snowing like this, I’m sure he’d have tracked you out here and taken it down single-handedly hours ago.” She let herself fall back, resting against the ground and staring at the roof of the cave.

  The smile on her face had a certain dreamy quality that people—people other than Jesse, anyway—got when they talked about his boyfriend. Wade was everyone’s idea of a great man, Devon included. He thought anyone in town would be shocked at the idea of Wade failing. Devon never expected Wade to fail, but that didn’t mean he wasn’t going to do everything possible to back him up.

  It was apparent, in retrospect, that he’d been looking at everything wrong. Wade was his responsibility, but he wasn’t a burden. The shop was kind of a burden. His position on the council and duty to take care of the town were definitely burdens, albeit ones he happily accepted most days. But Wade wasn’t a thing or a job; he was there to make Devon’s life easier, not harder.

  Wade hadn’t been trying to force the conversation about the future because he wanted promises about kids and domesticity. He’d been trying to force the conversation about the future because he wanted to make sure Devon was going to show up for it.

  “I’m an idiot,” he muttered, to himself as much as Vera.

  “Most of us are sometimes.”

  He was about to respond when he heard a commotion outside. There was a long, loud howl that sounded like it came from above them, followed by snarling and growling. Wade. He would know that howl anywhere. He grabbed the rowan branch, pulling the end out of the fire, and headed for the mouth of the cave.

  Wade and the troll were circling each other, Wade growling, and the creature, as always, eerily silent.

  “Hey there, stranger,” Akiyama said as he sauntered around the side of the cave, gentle smile in place. “We heard you could use some help.”

  Devon hardly glanced at him, eyes trained on Wade. “Are you going to help him?”

  “Who, Wade?”

  “No, the troll.”

  Akiyama laughed. “It’s okay, Devon.” His eyes strayed to the smoldering branch in Devon’s hand, and his eyebrows climbed into his hairline. “That’s terrifying and a little badass. Didn’t know you had that kind of calculated violence in you.”

  “Why aren’t you worried about Wade?”

  They both turned and looked at the fight, which hadn’t even turned into a fight yet. “I promise you, Wade’s gonna be fine. Plus, he told me if I left you alone and you got hurt, he was going to put me on front desk duty for the rest of my life. And he could do that, so I’m here to keep you from getting hurt.”

  Devon scowled at him. “Well, I’m going to help Wade.”

  “Whoa there, Chuck Norris.” Akiyama took hold of Devon’s shoulder with one hand and the burning branch with the other. “Fine. You promise me you’ll stay here and not slip and hurt yourself, and I’ll go join the fray.”

  For a moment, Devon said nothing. He sure wasn’t going to stand there and watch Wade and Akiyama get hurt if the fight didn’t go well. Finally, he formed wording he could live with. “If you go help him, I’ll stay here unless one of you gets injured.”

  “Seriously injured,” Akiyama bargained.

  Devon sighed and nodded. “Seriously injured.”

  Akiyama pulled the stick out of his hand and headed for the fight.

  The troll was not stupid, despite any preconceived notions Devon might have had. It saw a second target heading into the fight and made a quick decision to eliminate the first foe before the second arrived. It lifted a huge fist and swung at Wade.

  The move was telegraphed, but the troll was faster than a creature that big had any right to be, and it clipped one of Wade’s front legs.

  Wade reacted, launching himself forward and raking his claws over the troll’s chest and shoulder. The troll stumbled but regained its footing quickly, despite the gush of black blood that trickled down its torso.

  If Devon hadn’t seen Wade flinch when his paws hit the ground, he would have considered the exchange a win. But Wade was hurt, and it was from protecting him.

  Akiyama, who was fast for a guy who acted so laid back, had removed his heavy winter coat and tossed it away. He was wielding the branch like a spear: aloft and overhand. It wasn’t balanced for throwing, but Akiyama was at least acting like he was skilled with improvised weapons. He lashed out with the stick, and the troll spun to avoid it, but took a blow to its arm, close to where Wade had clawed it.

  Unlike its pained stumble and quick recovery from Wade’s claws, the troll recoiled from the burning rowan and opened its mouth in a silent, pained scream. It backed away from Akiyama and Wade, who now approached it from different sides.

  Devon could practically see the logical process in its head. Two dangerous foes, at least one of whom was certainly fast enough to catch it if it tried to run. Again, it decided to try to end one of the threats, and once again, it chose Wade.

  The monster lunged for Wade, putting its full body behind the motion, and Devon had the horrible image of tons of troll squashing the much smaller wolf flat. He wasn’t sure how he kept himself from calling out, but a distraction was the last thing Wade needed while fighting for his life.

  Wade, unlike the troll, was not just quick, but nimble as well. He ducked the attack and raced in to wrap his jaws around the back of the troll’s ankle, just above its heel. With a disturbing show of bite strength, he shook his head violently as he pulled away, and Devon could almost see the troll’s Achilles tendon fail. It made that same soundless scream and fell forward into the snow.

  Akiyama, not giving the thing any time to recover, jumped on its back and stabbed the burning rowan branch down into it, again and again. The monster tried to roll over, to shake or throw the much smaller man off, but the deputy was tenacious. He kept his balance, and after a few strikes, the troll’s bucking turned into shuddering, and then what looked like involuntary muscle spasms.

  Devon shivered and looked away.

  He’d wanted the thing dead, but he hadn’t wanted to watch it happen. He felt a little wimpy, but he told himself that was social programming. He didn’t have to be violent just because he was a man.

  He turned and headed back into the cave, where the children were awake and clinging to Vera.

  “Is Deputy Wade here?” Lisa asked.

  Jayden nodded, practically vibrating with excitement in addition to terror. “He came to save us from the monster, right? Deputy Wade will kill it.”

  “I’ll have you know Deputy Akiyama killed it,” the man himself said as he walked into the cave. He was trying to shake the snow off his coat but looked up and flashed the kids his brightest smile. “I guess Deputy Wade helped me a little, though.”

  Devon snorted. “A little.”

  “And Devon helped a little too,” he added, motioning back to where he’d dropped the no-longer-burning rowan branch outside the cave. The end was stained black, and Devon wanted to think it was just from the fire, but he knew better.

  He shuddered. “I don’t need credit for that.”

  Meanwhile, Lisa pushed up and threw herself at Devon. “I knew you would save us, Mr. Wade.”

  He sighed and knelt down to give her a hug. His ankle throbbed, but he ignored it. He also ignored Akiyama’s raised eyebrows and failed attempt to cover his laughter. He was never going to lose that nickname now.

  Wade came into the cave, still a wolf—he didn’t have a lot of choice there, since he didn’t have a change of clothes. He barked and tossed his head at the opening.

  “You’re a demanding shi—person—as a wolf, you know that?” Devon asked. Akiyama snickered at his stumble. Devon didn’t curse that much, but he figured if any situation called for it, it was this one. But Lisa and Jayden were five, and he doubted their mothers would appreciate them using the old “I heard Mr. Wade say it, why can’t I?”


  “But Mr. Wade, he’s not a person when he’s a wolf,” Lisa said. “He’s a wolf.”

  Wade stopped trying to hurry them back out and walked over to where they stood around the fire. Illuminated with the dwindling firelight like that, he looked huge. It reminded Devon of the first time they’d met, just a few months earlier, in the middle of the night after Devon had crashed his car. He padded over to where Devon was kneeling and rested his head on Devon’s shoulder.

  Lisa gave an adorable squeal and put one arm around Wade’s head, so she was hugging them both. “You saved our lifes. Can we go home now?”

  Devon hugged her back. “I agree, we should get moving before that snow gets any thicker. We’ve already got like a foot out there.”

  Akiyama looked outside and then back at them. “More than that, and it’s getting bad now. I’ve never seen a storm act like this before.” He bit his lip, looking at the kids. “I know you guys want to hang out with Deputy Wade, and he’s pretty cool, but how do you feel about walking with me, so he can walk with”—he chuckled—“Mr. Wade?”

  Lisa was a little hesitant, but Jayden agreed.

  While Akiyama was another resident of the harbor whose heritage Devon was clueless about, he knew the man’s abilities had something to do with the cold. He suspected the deputy wanted the kids with him to protect them from the snow, and Devon would do anything to support that.

  He leaned toward Lisa and whispered in her ear. “You should probably stick with Jayden. I think he feels better when you’re around.”

  She looked dubious, and he realized he’d almost forgotten what it felt like to have his word questioned.

  He held up his hand as though taking an oath. “I swear, it’s true.”

  “Okay,” she agreed, and glanced over at Jayden, who was looking at her hopefully. She hugged Devon and then Wade again and went to join her friend with Deputy Akiyama. As they headed out, she asked, “So you helped Deputy Wade kill the monster?”

  Vera chuckled, grabbed her coat, and followed after. She paused in the mouth of the cave and looked back. “Will you be able to walk okay, Devon?”