All I Want for Christmas Is a Cowboy

by Jessica Clare

  Of course, she’d been pushing for this moment for what felt like days—and now that it was here, she was a little nervous.

  Sex was a big step between two people. Cass didn’t really worry that there would be something about Eli that would be a turnoff, but it was still a big change in how they’d been together, and so she had nervous butterflies in her stomach. There was no going back after sex. Everything changed for good.

  But she was likely worrying over nothing. Eli was a great kisser. He had an amazing body. He’d given her orgasms yesterday that made her thighs clench together in memory. Sex would be great. If she didn’t stress out over where it led them, she could enjoy herself. So Cass gave herself mental pep talks as Eli showered, and fluffed her hair again and made sure she had nice sheets on the bed, because she could control those kinds of things. She didn’t have extra panties or bras, because hers were still trapped in her car. She’d been wearing his boxers and rewashing her one pair every day, and she hoped they didn’t look too pitiful. She wondered if guys noticed a sad-looking bra and panty set like girls did.

  The bathroom door opened, and Cass practically jumped, her heart pounding. She pressed a hand to her chest as Eli emerged from the bathroom, all dewy, tanned skin and wet hair. He wore nothing but a pair of plaid sleep pants, and she forced herself not to stare at that rock-hard browned chest. He frowned at her startled expression. “Everything all right?”

  “Yes. I . . . just jumpy.” She smiled at him. “Nervous, I guess.” Even the little laugh she made after saying that sounded like a high-pitched trill of anxiety.

  “Nervous, huh?” He rubbed his hair with a towel and then tossed it aside, moving toward her.

  Maybe she was. How could she not be with such an attractive, masculine man in front of her? Time to play it cool so he wouldn’t know just how nervous she truly felt. So all she said was, “Do you have condoms here?”

  His ears flushed red and he nodded, pulling two out of a pocket in his pants. “Found them in the bathroom.”

  “Not expired, I hope,” she teased, trying to make the mood lighter.

  Eli rubbed his ear and shook his head. “I imagine they’re Jordy’s. He fashions himself a bit of a ladies’ man.”

  “Well then, I’m glad I was stuck up here with you and not Jordy.” Cass moved forward, shoring up her courage, and put her arms around his neck. “I wanted to say thank you, Eli.”

  His hands slid down her back, rubbing her lightly. “Thank me? For what? Showering?”

  “No, for finding me that day and bringing me here. I couldn’t have asked for better treatment or a more handsome protector.”

  “Anyone would have done it,” Eli told her, looking uncomfortable at her praise.

  “Maybe.” Maybe anyone would have done it, but she also wouldn’t have fallen for just anyone. There weren’t many people like Eli, with his rigid code of ethics and his stubborn determination. There wouldn’t have been anyone with those piercing eyes and protective nature. It was as if someone had decided she needed a cowboy for Christmas and given her the best present ever. “I still feel lucky to be here with you, though.”

  “I feel the same. I wasn’t looking forward to being here alone,” he admitted, his hands sweeping up and down her back in slow stroking motions that made her feel petted and adored. “Figured it’d just be really quiet, but having you here has been . . . amazing. Normally I’d take my time outside, do everything I could to try to get ahead, and instead, I find myself racing through my chores so I can get back to you.” He grabbed a handful of her hair and let it spill over his fingers. “Might say I’m obsessed.”

  “I’m okay with that,” she teased. “Obsess away.”

  “It’s new for me,” he admitted, twining one of her curls around his fingers. “Never cared if anyone stayed or went before, and now I can’t stop thinking about what’ll happen when you leave. What happens to us.” The look in his eyes grew wary, as if he were afraid of getting hurt. “Cass—”

  “Let’s not think about that right now,” she whispered, because hearing him voice the same worries she had wasn’t helping things. She put a hand on his chest and slid her fingers down the lines of his pectorals, following their delineation with a fingertip. “Let’s just think about us and we can see where this leads.”

  “Pretty sure it’s leading to bed,” Eli said.

  “I certainly hope so.” Cass dipped her fingertip into his navel. “Otherwise, I’m going to be mighty disappointed.”

  “I’d hate to disappoint you,” he told her, voice husky with need. He tightened his hand in her hair and lowered his mouth to hers in a searing kiss that made her toes curl. His tongue swept into her mouth with such ownership and authority that it only took moments before she was panting, her pulse throbbing between her thighs. How did he manage to get her so aroused so very quickly? It seemed like all he had to do was press his lips to hers and she’d turn into a puddle of need. Their mouths met with wild, hungry kisses, and it felt like it had been days since he’d last touched her, when in reality, it was only a few hours.

  Too long, she decided. Her body had forgotten what his hands felt like and she needed to learn it again. She slid her hands to his waist, playfully tugging at the string at the front of his flannel pants. “Can I unwrap my Christmas present now?”

  His eyes grew hot with arousal. “You want to go first? I thought I’d lay you down on the bed and get you all nice and naked for me. Put my mouth on a few places it hasn’t had a chance to go yet.”

  “Oh, I’m absolutely looking forward to that,” Cass breathed. “But I want my turn first.” She moved down to her knees, gazing up at him, and then carefully pulled on his pants until they slid down his thighs and he was naked before her. And mercy, what a sight that was. His cock was big and thick, straining with his arousal, the skin flushed. His hips were a pale white compared to the tan of his chest, and she could only imagine how deep it would be in the summer. It made her smile to think that she was the only one who’d seen this delicious sight in a long, long time. Not even the sun got to glimpse what she was about to put her hands—and mouth—on.

  “Merry Christmas to me,” she murmured, and then wrapped her fingers around his length.

  He groaned the moment her lips touched him. “Cass. Damn. Your mouth. I . . . can’t . . .”

  “Shhh,” she told him as she moved her mouth along his length, exploring him with her tongue and lips. The heat of him seemed to be magnified here, and it made her shiver to feel just how hard he was under all that velvety soft skin. Cass let her lips whisper up and down his shaft before she took him in her mouth and gave the underside of his head a slow lick. She loved the sounds he made as she worked his cock, because it just made her more excited to touch him. She flicked her tongue against the head and then took him deeper into her mouth, trying to pull him in as far as she could.

  “No,” Eli breathed, pulling Cass away from his length. “I want to come inside you. I’m not ready to be done yet.” He pulled her to her feet and caressed her cheek, just staring at her as if she were the most precious thing he’d ever seen.

  Cass sighed dreamily up at him, sliding a hand against his neck and holding him close. “I love touching you. I want to put my mouth all over you.”

  “We’ve got time,” he reminded her, and then pulled the shirt knot at her waist apart, loosening her top. “All the time we need.”

  She bit her lip and let her arms fall to her sides, allowing him to undress her. He kissed her over and over again as he unbuttoned the shirt, then pushed it off her arms and onto the floor. Next went her bra, and all the while, his mouth made sweet love to hers. Then she was in nothing but her jeans and he was working on those, too. When he slid them down her thighs, she shucked her panties too, impatient.

  Then they were both naked, arms twining around each other, skin to skin as their kisses grew more intense. Cass moaned as
he lifted her into his arms and hauled her onto the bed. He caressed her breasts as she lay back, and then gave her another hot, sultry kiss of promise before he straightened, standing tall over her.

  “Condoms,” was all he said.

  Right. Condoms were definitely important. She slid her hands over her breasts as she waited for him, aching with need. Cass watched him from her spot, prone on the bed, as he opened the package and rolled the condom down his length. He glanced over at her and she caressed herself again, just because he was looking.

  Eli groaned. “A man would die happy at the sight of you right now, Cass.”

  “I don’t know how happy he’d be,” she told him playfully, reaching for him with one arm. “Because he’d be missing out on all the good parts.”

  But he didn’t respond to her quip. He just moved to her side, and while she touched him and caressed his chest, he ran his gaze over her body. “No bruises or pains from the accident, right?”

  She snorted and tweaked his nipple. “You should have asked about that last night when we made out.”

  He flicked her hand off his chest, which told her that he was sensitive there . . . which meant she wanted to touch him in that spot even more. “I was distracted. I’m askin’ now.”

  “I’m fine. Really. Look, no bruises.” She cupped her breasts and jiggled them. “Everything’s working as intended.”

  “Can’t help a man if he worries about you,” Eli told her in a low voice. He leaned over her, his cock prodding against her thigh, and grazed his thumb over her brow, on the mark that was sure to leave a scar.

  “I promise I’m fine.” He was making her ache with how thoughtful he was. She skimmed her fingers up one arm and down the center of his chest. “But I know something that would make me feel finer.”

  Eli cocked an eyebrow at her, and it took her breath away how sexy he was. “I do believe you have a one-track mind.”

  “I do believe you’re right.”

  “I’ll see what I can do about that, then.” He moved onto the bed and covered her body with his. Cass automatically put her legs around his waist, encouraging him to slide closer. He gave her another deep, soulful kiss even as his hand slid to her thighs, pushing them farther apart. “I love the way you feel, baby,” he whispered as he sank into her. “So soft and warm, and all mine.”

  Cass moaned at the sensation of him filling her. He’d pierced her so deep that she swore she could feel him inside her all the way to her heart. It felt incredible, and she tightened her legs around him even more.

  He remained stiff over her, arms propping up his weight on either side of her shoulders, his face full of tension. He didn’t move, and she gave him a curious look, caressing his shoulder. “What is it?”

  “Too good,” he gritted, closing his eyes. “Give me a moment.”

  Was he close to losing control? She loved the thought of that. It made her feel so sexy to think that this big, delicious cowboy was close to pushing his limits just at touching her. She wanted to test that theory. So she dug her nails into his shoulders and lifted her hips against him, sinking him deeper.

  The breath hissed from his throat. With a low, sexy growl, Eli buried his face against her neck and began to thrust, hard and sure. Oh god, yes. This was exactly what she wanted. She moaned encouragement even as he pushed into her, making their bodies rock on the bed as they came together. She tried to meet his thrusts with her hips, but it was too much for her to keep up with, and all she could do was cry out and tremble against him as he ruthlessly made love to her.

  An orgasm built inside her belly, far too quickly. She tried to mentally push it aside, to focus on the pleasure of his body surging over hers. It was so good, she wanted it to keep going forever. But her body had other ideas. Within minutes, she was clenching tighter with every thrust, a low keening building in her throat. “Eli,” she panted, full of a need that couldn’t be defined.

  “I’ve got you, Cass,” he murmured into her ear. “I’ve got you.”

  She shattered. Her body curled in on itself as the orgasm rocketed through her, and she cried out at the intensity of it. Eli called her name hoarsely, his movements becoming erratic even as they grew fiercer. Then he shuddered atop her, and she knew he’d come, too.

  She held him against her, panting, and realized her skin was dewy with sweat. His was, too, and she leaned in and breathed deeply of his scent. Even after all this, he smelled wonderful. He also looked good enough to eat, and she was still frisky, so she nipped at his shoulder and then swiped her tongue over the tiny mark.

  Eli chuckled, and she could feel it deep inside her. “Give a guy a moment to rest, Cass.”

  “Just a moment,” she whispered, and licked his shoulder again. “The day is young, remember?”

  “I haven’t forgotten.” He lifted his head and gazed down at her, then brushed a sweaty lock of hair from her brow. “You’re beautiful, you know that?”

  She could feel herself blushing, which was silly, given that the man’s cock was still buried deep inside her. Her fingers skimmed over her brow and the big, nasty mark there. “I looked better before.”

  “Not to me.”

  “You didn’t see me before—”

  “Precisely.” He kissed the tip of her nose. “So don’t argue.”

  “You’re impossible.”

  “Ah, but I’m yours.”

  Cass liked the sound of that, a lot.

  CHAPTER TWENTY

  One week later

  She never thought she’d be so unhappy to see snow melt. Cass sipped coffee from a big red mug and tried not to glare at the sun shining down from the pale blue skies. It wasn’t the first sunny day since Christmas, but just the latest in a string of pleasant (well, for winter) days that were slowly but surely reducing the heaps of white snow on the ground. Snow melting meant changes.

  She didn’t want changes.

  She wasn’t ready for them.

  Everything in Cass’s life felt perfect. She had a few holes where her memory was, but it bothered her less as the days went on. It’d come back, or she’d make new memories to fill the holes. She was becoming more used to the idea as time passed. It had been enjoyable to be here at the ranch, even if there was a lot of work to be done. She’d graduated from just helping with the chickens to now helping to feed the horses and muck out stalls. Eli allowed her to help only if she didn’t seem tired at the end of the day, so Cass made sure she looked fresh and cheery even if it was exhausting work. She enjoyed helping him out, though. It was hard, but satisfying. She loved feeding the horses, because they were always so excited to see their food. In a way, it was like Christmas for them every day, and that was fun.

  Of course, there were also the puppies. Frannie’s pups seemed to get bigger every time she saw them, and at a week old, their eyes were still closed, but they were fat and fuzzy, and made the most adorable little whines and grunts as they nursed from their patient mama.

  And then there was Eli. Even as she stood at the window, she scanned the pasture looking for him. He wasn’t out there, of course. Since the weather was better, he’d moved the cattle to a less muddy pasture because the one they’d been in for the last while was destroyed, and it was farther away from the ranch. She still searched for his horse, though, because she was addicted to the sight of him. Even a glimpse of her cowboy from afar set her heart to fluttering.

  And, ahem, other parts to fluttering, too.

  It was New Year’s Day, and they’d been sleeping in the same bed for the last week. Maybe there was a tiny, worried part of her that feared that the sex wouldn’t stay great. That something would happen between them and the spark would melt away, just like the snow was. She supposed that would make things a lot easier. It was the opposite, though. With every day that passed, she fell for Eli just a little more, craved his kisses a little more. Daydreamed about touching him and being i
n bed with him that night. She fantasized about new ways for them to explore each other, and she loved surprising him with caresses in the middle of the night. There was nothing better than a cowboy shocked to find his girlfriend’s mouth on his body at three in the morning. She loved doing it, and he loved receiving it, so what was the harm?

  Cass supposed she was his girlfriend. They hadn’t really discussed labels. That hadn’t seemed necessary. She was his and he was hers, and that was all there was to it. They couldn’t keep their hands off each other. He laughed at her corny jokes. He ate her terrible attempts at cooking and made her breakfast because he liked to let her sleep curled up in the blankets for a bit longer than him every morning. They shared showers. He washed her hair. They even played cards together. Last night, he’d read aloud from his copy of Lonesome Dove with his head on her lap while she worked on crocheting him a matching scarf.

  It was nice and homey and simple, and she loved it. Maybe she’d never been this person in the past, but she was now.

  It was easy to not think about the world outside of Price Ranch when your life consisted of a snowbound house in the mountains. She didn’t call anyone or get on the Internet. She figured that somewhere out there, someone would be looking for her. She knew that, and she felt guilty about it . . . but she just couldn’t force herself to Google things and somehow trace back her information. It felt like if she did, it’d ruin everything.

  Cass didn’t know why she felt like that, just that she did. It was a gut feeling, an instinct. Happiness was fragile, and she was determined not to be the one to screw it up.

  She hadn’t confessed her worries to Eli. He was afraid of nothing, and she didn’t want him to worry with just what it was that she was afraid of. She didn’t want to put doubt into his mind. But late at night in bed, sometimes she worried. She worried about the kind of person she was.