Rebellion Project

by Sara Schoen

  Parker had been avoiding coming over when he was home, and if he showed up she would race to my room. She wasn’t ready to face him, and I wasn’t sure she would ever be. I couldn’t blame her, I barely could, but I had to live here too. She avoided him, but eventually she’d run into him and I kind of wanted to see how it played out.

  Parker sent me a text to tell me she was here, but before I could even make it to the door she started to ring the doorbell repeatedly. I rolled my eyes as I opened the door to see her pushing the button as if she was playing a video game. The second her eyes landed on me she stopped and went into shock. Her jaw fell open, her hand was frozen on the doorbell, and her eyes locked onto my hair. I snapped my fingers in front of her eyes, breaking her from the trance and causing her to jump back slightly.

  “I’m sorry, I must have the wrong house,” she said sarcastically as she took a few strands of my hair. “Because my friend is a blonde, and never wears clothes like that.” She gestured to my ripped skinny jeans and form fitting sweater with spike embellishments near the collar.

  “Well, now she does, so I hope you like it because I’m starting to love it,” I replied with a smile.

  Parker leaned in and hugged me. “I’m really proud of you. I never thought I’d see such a drastic change. When did you guys start?”

  “Three days ago. We started the Saturday after break when my dad was out of the house and then went on the shopping trip yesterday. I needed some time after the hair salon,” I said as I pulled her inside the house and shut the door, effectively sealing out the December air.

  Once the door was shut, Parker started asking a ton of questions, all while she completely ignored my dad’s rules and tossed her shoes in the first place she found. She tossed her jacket on the couch and then pulled me up the stairs. I didn’t say anything about her clear disregard for my dad’s rules.

  “So tell me everything,” Parker instructed as she immediately took a seat on the edge of my bed and messed up the sheets I had just straightened. “How did he get you to dye your hair? Is it permanent or will it wash out?”

  I joined on the freshly made bed since she had already messed up my sheets. “Well, first we cut it because he said they were going to have to bleach my hair. So I got fourteen inches taken off and donated the hair to Locks of Love, and then we dyed it. It’s permanent and will come out as it grows out and I cut it.”

  “I’m just amazed that he got you to cut it,” Parker replied. “I haven’t heard about you getting a haircut in years. It was so long, and now you have short hair. Was it a big shock?”

  I thought back to the salon Kayden had taken me to. While I had screamed when I saw how short my hair was when the hairdresser turned me around, I think the blue was a bigger shock. “It was, but when I saw the blue I started crying. I thought it looked awful, but it started to grow on me in no time.”

  Parker looked at me with a slight tilt to her head. She seemed to examine me closely as she leaned in with an unrecognizable expression. Her eyes were radiant, as if she had been told she won the lottery, and her smile was a mix between playful and experiencing a breakthrough. I didn’t like where this was going. “What else has started to grow on you, or should I say who has?”

  “What are you talking about?” I asked, pushing her away. She was invading my personal space and if she had gotten any closer I would have fallen off the bed to get away from her.

  “I can see it written all over your face,” Parker claimed.

  “See what?”

  “You’ve become friends with Kayden already, I can see it clear as day. Who knew you guys would be such fast friends? I thought you’d give him a fat lip before you guys worked out your problems.” Her voice squeaked with excitement, but I squashed her idea before she could delve much further. There was no way I was going to be friends with Kayden. He was doing this to make up for telling everyone what happened between my parents, and I was doing it for a lot of reasons. I wanted to change, I wanted to learn to be myself and make my own choices, but mostly I wanted to know what it was like to feel free. I wasn’t in this to find a guy, much less someone like Kayden.

  “Don’t get too far ahead of yourself, Parker. There’s nothing going on between us. I still find him annoying, especially after walking around the mall with him for hours on end and him shoving me into store after store. He insulted me the entire time, and forced me into outfits I wasn’t comfortable in. That doesn’t make him a top contender for dating except for the fake relationship I explained over text. I can’t have a guy pushing and manipulating me into things. That’s just not healthy.”

  “But you said he was supportive of you.”

  “Yes, he’s really supportive, like allowing me to make my own choices and deal with the consequences. He was there for me when I needed his help, and let me stand up to him. He was very surprised I did it, but he respected me for it. While he’s supportive in those times, he’s still really rude. He threw out some of my favorite clothes, and then tore them to pieces when I tried to take them back. He dyed my hair blue, and took me shopping in stores I would never go into by myself. Then, the kicker is this,” I said as I tentatively moved my hair so I could show her the new piercing I got when we were leaving the mall.

  “You got your cartilage pierced!” Parker cried in excitement as she leaned in to look. “You haven’t gotten your ears pierced since sixth grade.”

  “That’s because I wasn’t allowed to have more than one piercing, according to my dad’s rules, but when we saw it I thought ‘why not’ and went with it. I even got a second hole next to the first piercing I got.”

  “What did your dad say?”

  I sighed. “Luckily I haven’t had to explain it to him yet. He’s been out of the house a lot recently. If I had to guess, he’s with that woman again. I mean, she was here when we got back from the attorney’s office and was sitting downstairs like she owned the place, but anyway,” I said, letting the topic digress. “When he sees the piercings I’m sure he won’t take it well.”

  “Wait,” Parker said, holding out her hands for emphasis. “Did you say that woman was back in here? I can’t believe she came back after what you said to her. I’d never have come back if you spoke to me like that.”

  I offered her an apologetic smile. I hadn’t realized I had forgotten to tell her that part when I went over to her house that night. I had jumped straight into the need to be myself, and learn from a little rebellion. I was also embarrassed that hadn’t realized I had been that rude, but the woman had angered me by being here. I wanted her to leave and never come back, I guess it didn’t work. “Yeah, and Dad just kind of sprang it on me,” I explained. “I walked in and she was sitting downstairs in Mom’s seat and I just kind of lost it again. I told her I couldn’t believe she came back, which wasn’t fair to her because Dad probably invited her back, but it’s how I felt at the time.”

  “How did that go? I mean, I wouldn’t be happy with seeing her again either, but what did she do when you came in?”

  “Well, first she offered condolences and from there I just kind of lost it,” I said, but I paused too long because Parker quickly jumped back in.

  “That doesn’t sound so bad.” She gave a dismissive wave as if she had done worse herself, but she was in for a surprise.

  “That’s because I’m not done yet,” I replied before taking a deep breath. “After I started yelling, I just sort of ended up on a roll. I told her she was the reason my mom and I left. She was the reason we moved out, and refused to come back to where our family had grown up. Then I turned around and blamed her personally for my mom’s death. I said she was the reason my mom had to take a different route home, and had been working later than usual, and went as far as to say she was the one who caused it. I was mean, but I still don’t feel awful about it. She deserved to hear it, but of course my father stepped in before I could finish and sent me to my room.”

  “What happened from there?”

  “Well, that’s
when I went to your house. I hadn’t really thought to tell you why the sudden change, I just wanted to do it before I lost the courage to try. It’s worked out so far, and frankly I’m pleased I did it. I just feel like there’s more going on, and I’m worried I’ll lose control if I’m not careful.”

  “That’s pretty intense. I never would have expected that from you, Lauren.” Parker smiled proudly at me for a moment. “I guess this is really working out for you then. Even if Kayden can be a jerk, I can see that he’s having somewhat of a good influence on you.” Parker paused for a second before she backtracked. “Well, a good influence to break out. He’s not really helping with the confidence yet, but you’re so much happier. Even I can see that from you just working with him for a short time. You’re going to do whatever you want from now on, and you’re learning to live a little. That’s all I wanted for you.”

  I nodded in agreement. “That’s how I want it to end up, but I need more help before I can stand on my own, I think. I leaned on Kayden heavily for the start of the shopping trip, and if there’s more to come, I have a feeling that if he isn’t by my side I won’t be able to finish this.”

  Parker offered me a friendly smile. “You’ll always have me to help you even if Kayden does leave. You’ll finish this and you can be whatever you want to be without anyone holding you back, not even yourself.”

  Chapter 12

  Charades

  “I can’t believe I’m actually doing this,” I said to myself as I pressed the gold plated doorbell and heard the chime echo from the house. A heavy sigh escaped my lips as I looked at my reflection in the glass. I liked what I saw, but my dad had a different take on it. He had been so upset at me when he had come back from his business trip and saw my hair, then even more when he saw the ripped up jeans and slouchy tank top I had been wearing around the house. I wasn’t what he wanted in a daughter. He sent me out of the house to change at Parker’s and get the blue dye out of my hair. I didn’t have the heart to tell him that he’d have to wait for my hair to grow out so I’d lose the blue, he’d figure it out soon enough.

  On my way over to Parker’s I received a call from Kayden. I stopped the car so I could talk to him on the phone. After my mom’s accident I had become a very careful driver. I wanted to make sure nothing happened that could have been avoided because I had a phone while I was driving. When I told him I was on my way to Parker’s because my dad had sent me away he told me to come over and spend the day with him until my dad cooled down. I was reluctant to reroute because I wanted to see Parker, but Kayden wasn’t having it.

  “I’m not going to lose the progress we’ve already made,” he repeated. I rolled my eyes, but he knew what I was thinking. “Come over, it won’t kill you to hang out with me. You’re going to have to get used to the charade of us being a couple anyway.”

  “That’s just it, it’s a charade. It’s not real,” I stated, but nonetheless I listened to him. I rerouted and had made it to his front door a few minutes later. Thankfully we had gone to his house after our shopping trip the other day or I would have gotten lost in his maze of a neighborhood. Of course now he kept me waiting at his door as if he wasn’t expecting me to show up. I think it was payback for making him wait when he first showed up at my house.

  “Kayden, open the door!” I cried out as the door knob started to jiggle, but the door remained sealed. He was trying to test my patience and one day it would run out. I felt bad for whoever I directed my anger at. I rarely got angry, but when I did I was hell for whoever set me off. Parker even said she didn’t know I could be scary, but then she saw me angry. If Kayden wasn’t careful he’d see my wrath too.

  “Why? You might want to stab me, or kill me for all I know,” he said with a chuckle. He was mocking me for not opening the door when he came to visit, and I was growing annoyed with him. I glared at him through the stained glass window, waiting for him to open the door. I could hear him laugh as he finally popped open the door. “Come on, Lauren, you have to lighten up a little bit. I’m told my best quality is my sense of humor.”

  “Well, whoever told you that was lying,” I said as I pushed past him and entered the home. Exactly like last time I was taken by surprise by how different it was compared to what I thought it would look like. I thought it would be more like Kayden, but then again I guess it was really his parents’ home and would be more of a reflection on them than on him. There was a high ceiling with a crystal chandelier above my head as I entered and to my right was a dark wooden staircase leading upstairs. The same dark wood floor led into a white tiled kitchen that took my breath away.

  Kayden followed behind me, letting me explore his house for a little while since he had been adamant about me not doing it last time. Instead he took me into the basement and put a few well-placed tears and cuts into the clothes we had bought, and styled my shoes the way he wanted them to look. I had gone home a very different person than I was when I left that morning.

  I could hear Kayden chuckling as I walked between the rooms and got wrapped in something in each one. In the kitchen, it was the large island, while in the den I was enamored with the books and reading nook that they had between the bookshelves. Kayden quickly realized that if he let me I would stay in this room forever, and led me onto the couch in the den. He gestured for me to take a seat. I sat down, but grew uncomfortable as he took the seat next to me and caused our arms to brush. I tried to slide over a little bit to create a space between us, but I had chosen to sit next to the arm and now had nowhere to move. We were forced to be so close we constantly brushed against each other.

  “Stop struggling. I’m not going to hurt you,” Kayden said as he slid over enough to give me some space to relax.

  “I know, I’m just not used to someone being that close to me. Plus, every time you get near me it means you’re going to insult me.”

  “Well, you’d typically be right, GG,” he said with a smile. “Sorry, I mean Lauren. It’s hard to break such an old habit.”

  “Shut up.”

  Kayden gasped and placed his hands over his chest in an over-exaggerated motion. “I think that’s the meanest thing you’ve ever said to me,” he said sarcastically. Without thinking I slapped him on the back of his head. I saw him blink and give me a look of utter confusion as if he couldn’t be sure that I actually hit him. “That’s definitely the meanest thing you’ve probably ever done to anyone,” Kayden stated with anger lacing his words. “I’m so proud!” He suddenly burst out with a smile. “I can see the improvement already.”

  “I could see it when you did this to my hair,” I said, lightly pulling on my ponytail in order to show him the blue coloring. I had grown to love it, it was exactly the color I had wanted and even though I had to bleach my hair to get it, I didn’t care. Every time I saw it I smiled, and I hoped my hair wouldn’t grow out too quickly. I wanted to keep the color through the rest of the year if possible.

  “It could have been worse. I could have been mean and had them dye your hair green instead.” He let out a laugh just thinking about it. “Then I could have spread that rumor about how chlorine turns blonde hair green. You’d never hear the end of it.” His laughter subsided when he noticed my glare. He held his hands in the air in a surrendering position. “I’m kidding, just relax.”

  “You’re right, besides even if you did that it still wouldn’t be the meanest thing you’ve ever done to me. The worst was telling the whole school what happened between my parents,” I stated sourly. I was still upset about it, and I had a right to be. He had aired my family’s dirty laundry for the whole school to hear and now I was an even bigger outcast and ridiculed even more often. The last few weeks of school had been nearly impossible. I had even contemplated skipping a few days to get away from the remarks, but didn’t, trying to push through the comments. More than once I left in tears; no one cared as long as they got their moment shaming me.

  “I’m really sorry about that, but I’m helping now, aren’t I?”

&nb
sp; “You’re doing it because you feel bad,” I pointed out. I knew Parker told him this was how he was going to make it up to me, yet he still wanted something out of it in the end. Typical Kayden. “Should I be flattered by that? Because if I can be completely honest, I feel more insulted now more than ever. What am I, your charity case?”

  “What can I say? I love giving back, but you’re not a charity case. I’d say you’re more of a volunteer project,” he said with a smirk.

  “You’re such a jerk,” I cried as I jumped out off the couch.

  I turned to leave when I felt his hand latch onto my wrist. He pulled me lightly, trying to get me to turn and face him, but I refused. I didn’t want to hear what he had to say, especially if he was looking at this like a charity case. I’d prefer to have it called a rehabilitation rather than take his pity. I needed his help, not his criticism.

  Kayden stood up and gently turned me around to face him. “I’m sorry, Lauren. I really am,” he said, trying to show me the sincerity in his words, but I didn’t see anything except that guy who tortured me for the last ten years. His gaze silently pleaded with me to listen, but I knew him. I wasn’t sure he could be sorry for how he treated me. “I need you to trust me or this won’t work.” Kayden tried to pull me back to the reason I was working with him in the first place. It was a smart tactic, but I wasn’t sure I could trust him.

  “Why would I ever trust the person who put a worm in my drink when we were kids and let it escalate to putting pot in my brownies during our culinary class?” I questioned. I had almost experienced my first drugged food thanks to him and his friends. He thought it was a joke, and I was horror-stricken. I never planned to have drugs, and he was going to let our teacher eat double chocolate brownies he had spiked with weed at my expense.

  “I stopped you before you actually ate one!” Kayden pointed out, as if that would make it all better. Clearly he didn’t see my point.