He couldn’t even say anything in the restaurant, couldn’t explain or defend himself or even tell me that he cares about me. He just stood there like a statue and a guilty, shocked look on his face. The tears prickle at my eyes again and now I’m crying. Heaving, shuddering sobs rip through my body. Emma wraps her arms around me and I cry on her shoulder. I pull away and look at her, trying to search her face for answers. “Emma, thank you for bringing me home. I think I’d like to be alone now.â€� She looks at me and I can’t tell if she’s hurt or understanding. Her face crumples but she nods and leans in for one more hug. We stay like that for a few long seconds and I cry into her shoulder a little bit more. “Is there anything I can do before I go?â€� She says into my hair. “No, thank you.â€� She gathers her things and gets ready to leave. When she gets to the front door she pauses and then turns around and comes back to sit beside me. She takes my hands in hers and looks me in deep in the eye. I desperately don’t want this to come between us. She’s sitting there like she’s about to break up with me and the thought of our friendship ending over something like this makes my heart hurt even more than it was before. I can’t lose both of them, not at once, not today. Finally she opens her mouth to speak. “Val, I care about you. You’re my best friend.â€� She pauses, and I look at her through tear-filled eyes, waiting to hear what she wants to tell me. “I’ve never seen you like this, not even when you and Bryce broke up. Even then, you weren’t this upset. You were more resigned and a bit relieved.â€� She takes a deep breath and looks down at the floor beside me, studying my rug like it’s the most interesting rug in the world. When she looks up her eyes are filled with tears and I feel my heart heaving. “Look, at the end of the day, what you and Clay have seems to be special. I saw the way he looked at you before he saw me. He didn’t even see me at the table until I said something.â€� The tears are streaming down her face and I can’t help but cry as well. I’m sick of crying, but it feels good to cry together. If she could see it too, then maybe it was really there. Maybe Clay does care about me the way I care about him. We’ve only just met but the connection we have is different, deeper. “Val, I,â€� she hesitates, looking away from me again. “I was jealous at the restaurant. I saw the guy who rejected me and he was all starry-eyed for you. I hate to say it but I was jealous. And now I’m seeing you in so much pain and I can’t, I won’t be the person who does this to you. I care about you and I know how you’ve been talking about him, how much he seems to mean to you even after such a short amount of time. I think that a connection that strong shouldn’t be thrown away. He and I hooking up was a one night stand, and at the end of the day it meant nothing. I thought we had a connection but all we had was a fleeting mutual attraction. He never looked at me the way he was looking at you. Not even closeâ€� I’m crying for real now, sobbing as she talks to me. Her words are like a healing balm. She saw it too, she saw the connection between Clay and I. I’ve always been able to count on Emma and once again I’m glad to have her as a friend. She looks completely composed, except for the tears streaming down her face. Her red lipstick is somehow still perfect. “I could sit here and tell you he’s a jerk and a user and forget about him, but I don’t think that’s true. I saw the way you guys looked at each other and I think it’s too rare to just toss it away. You should talk to him and see what he has to say. It’s rare to meet someone that you click with, it’s worth giving it a shot.â€� She stops talking and looks at me with her tear-stained cheeks face. I love this girl so much. I lean over and give her another hug, burying my face in her curls. She wraps her arms around me and I can feel that she’s trembling. In her arms I stop sobbing and squeeze her a bit closer. We pull apart and I look at her face. “Emma,â€� I start. “Thank you.â€� She shakes her head and I stop talking. “Val, I’ve seen you suffering for the past four years with that asshole Bryce. I’m not going to be the one who makes you suffer more by standing in the way of you and a guy who seems to genuinely care about you. I’m not saying jump back in his arms but just know that I support you no matter what.â€� I nod, the words catching in my throat. The relief I feel is immense. I’m not going to lose a friend and a lover. I have a chance. “Plus,â€� she says, wiping her eyes and looking at me. The corner of her red lips are curling up into a grin. “I would never be the one who stands in the way of those earth-shattering orgasms you’ve been having.â€� My sobs turn to ugly, sobbing laughter and she laughs along with me. She grabs a tissue and hands it to me. I wipe my face off as best I can and Emma gives me another hug. “I’m going to go now. You’re my best friend Val, I’m not going to lose our friendship over some guy.â€� I’ve never been more glad to have Emma as a friend. She grabs her bag and heads towards the door. Her curly head disappears and she closes it softly behind her. I lay back on the couch and close my eyes, breathing deep. I don’t know what to think. I get up slowly and peel off my clothes. I get in the shower and turn it on as hot as I can stand. I stand under the steam and water and let it wash me clean. My mind clears as I wash myself from head to toe, taking my time. Stepping out of the shower, I dry myself off and wrap my hair in a towel. I grab my housecoat and wrap it around me, snuggling into its fresh warmth. I feel better. I dry my hair with the towel and hang it up, going over to the kitchen to make myself some more tea. I’ll take the afternoon and evening to myself to watch a movie and order some pizza. I look at my phone on the coffee table. Maybe I’ll text Clay, if I work up the nerve. I just need some time to calm down. I need to breathe, and process what’s been going on. Just when the kettle starts boiling I hear a knock on the door. I wrap the housecoat around me tighter and tie it off at the waist. I walk to my front door and open it. “Hey,â€� he says. His eyes are rimmed red and his clothes are crooked, his hair dishevelled. “Clay,â€� I say, still in shock. “What are you doing here?â€� Chapter 38 – Clay
She’s wearing a bathrobe, her hair is wet and she has no makeup on. My voice catches in my throat when I see her. She looks amazing and all I want to do is wrap my arms around her. “Val, I need to talk to you.� She’s standing at the door and slowly steps aside for me to walk in, closing the door behind me. She runs her fingers through her hair and pats them down the side of her housecoat and then looks up at me. “Did you mean the things you’ve been saying to me, about being different? Have you just been telling me what I want to hear?� Her voice is strained, and her eyes look like she’s been crying. “No! Of course not, Val…� My heart is pounding in my chest. I want, I need to make her understand that it’s been different with her. In a couple weeks she’s made me reevaluate my entire life, my priorities, my goals. Having her near me has changed the way I think. I don’t know how to put that into words and I just stare at her, speechless. She waits for me to talk and then sighs. “Would you like some tea? I’ve just boiled some water.� “I, uh.. Sure.� She walks by me into the kitchen and I turn around. Her apartment is small and cozy. She has an old couch that looks comfy and a flowery rug that dominates the room. There’s eclectic hangings on the wall in a sort of boho chic kind of way. It’s styled in an effortless kind of way, but I can tell lots of effort has gone into decorating. I walk over to a poster of Andy Warhol’s Marilyn when I hear her re-enter. She’s holding two steaming mugs and sets them down on the coffee table. She sits down on one end of the sofa and I take the other. We both take a sip of the hot liquid in silence. I still haven’t found the words to say anything. She’s staring at me with those blue eyes and I simultaneously want to look away and want to get lost in them. Finally she breaks the sile
nce. “Since you won’t start, I will. Clay, it hurt me to hear that you’ve been feeding me the same lines as all your other girls.â€� “Val! It’s not like that, I – “ she puts her hand up and I stop talking. “It made me feel like what I felt between us was a lie. It made me feel like opening up to you was a mistake, and that you were just using me for sex. I know that you’re leaving, you’re going to Seattle, but I just thought… I don’t know. I thought we had something different between us.â€� “We do!â€� Finally I can speak, I’ve found my voice. I lean in towards her, putting my mug down on the table. “Val, these past few weeks with you have been happier and more exciting for me than the past few years combined. I’ve been working so hard and avoiding any sort of relationship so much that I didn’t know what I was missing. Until you.â€� I take a deep breath and I see the tears gathering in her eyes. “Val, babe. I’m so, so sorry that I hooked up with Emma. You have to believe me that it was before I’d ever met you, and it didn’t mean anything to me. If I’d have known then that it would cause this between us I wouldn’t have gone anywhere near her. I know – â€� my voice cracks, “I know what that feels like and I never, ever, ever want to make you feel that way.â€� The tears are overflowing down her cheeks and she brings her hand up to wipe them away. She takes a sip of her tea and all I want to do is gather her in my arms and hold her close. “I won’t lie to you, I used to like going out and picking up women but since you walked into my office that Saturday morning I haven’t even wanted to, not even a little bit. You’ve shown me there can be more. I want you. Only you.â€� “Oh, Clay just be quiet,â€� she says, putting her mug down on the coffee table. She flies over to me and our lips collide, her arms are around my neck. My hands search for the waistband of her housecoat and untie it, reaching inside to feel her skin in my arms. She’s naked underneath, and I pull her nearer to me, wrapping my arms around her and holding her tight. I bring my lips to her neck, breathing in deeply to smell her fresh scent. This is where she belongs, in my arms. I tilt her chin up with my fingers and place my lips over hers again, kissing her more slowly. I want to taste her, smell her, feel her next to me. I don’t want to miss a single second of this. Chapter 39 – Valerie
Being in Clay’s arms feels like coming home. He’s got them wrapped around me tightly and I wrap mine around him. I don’t want to let go, not now, not ever. His lips taste so sweet, and his body feels strong and safe. His hands reach down and grab my ass, pulling me up so that I’m straddling him. My housecoat has fallen open and I’m completely naked on top of him. He slides it over my shoulders and then slips his hands down my chest to grab my tits. I close my eyes and enjoy the strong, soft touch of his hands all over me. My heart flutters every time he touches me. I feel like my chest is going to explode, my heart is overflowing. He wants me! Only me! I open my eyes and look at him. At his dark eyes as they stare back at me. There’s a softness in them that I haven’t seen before. Emma was right. The way he looks at me, it has to be real. I can’t believe it wouldn’t be. I can feel the emotion emanating from me as we look at each other, drink each other in. I stand up and take his hand in mine, leading him to my bedroom. I turn around and slip my hands under his shirt, helping him slide it overhead. I take a second to run my fingers all over his chiseled chest, his abs, back up around his neck. He leans down and kisses me softly, and then harder. His hand is on the small of my back and I feel myself melting into him. My hands search for his fly, trying to unbutton him as our lips are locked together. His hands reach down to help me and then we’re both naked. He pushes me backwards onto the bed and I feel the weight of his body on top of me. It feels good, so good to be here with him. He glances over to the side and back at me, grinning. “I see you went with Girl’s Best Friend,â€� he says. “A personal favourite of mine.â€� I look over and feel my cheeks burn when I see my prescription vibrator, proudly on display on my bedside table. Exactly where I put it right after I threw it against the wall the first day I got it. He grins and leans over to grab it. He turns it on and then slides over beside me, onto his side. Our legs are intertwined and he uses his leg to spread mine open. He brings the vibrator down towards my mound and around my lips, teasing me. The vibrations are strong, and I lean back into the bed to get used to them. His lips find my breasts and he starts sucking on my nipples while the vibrator moves closer and closer to my slit. Every flick of his tongue over my rock hard nipples sends a direct shock towards my centre. I never knew they could be so sensitive. He shifts his weight and moves to the other one, and then finally the vibrator moves up towards my bud. He circles my clit with it and turns the vibrations on higher. The electric warmth inside me starts growing quickly. I’ve never experienced anything like this and before I know it my orgasm surprises me and explodes from my centre outwards. My limbs contract and my back arches and I hear Clay moaning with me. Shockwaves of pleasure course through my entire body as he plays with my clit. Finally my body relaxes and he moves the vibrator away from my ultra sensitive bud. I open my eyes and look at him in shock. Maybe it is a Girl’s Best Friend. “I’ll go grab a condom, I need to be inside you,â€� he says as he shifts his weight towards the side of the bed. “Are you.. Have you been tested? Do you need a condom? I’m on the pill.â€� I’m surprising myself saying that. He looks at me with his dark eyes wide open. “Yeah I was tested last week, right after I met you. Are you sure?â€� In response I put my arms around him and wrap my legs around him. He shifts his weight on top of me and I can feel his hard cock pressed against my hipbone. The bare, hot skin of it burns against me and I can feel myself getting wetter. He takes his cock in his hand and places it against my opening. My pussy is tight and wet from my orgasm. He starts pushing himself into me and my mouth falls open. I feel myself stretch to accommodate his cock and I moan as he pushes it deeper and deeper inside me. It feels so good to be filled with him, to feel his skin against mine. I never thought it would make such a difference. His thrusts are long and deep, and I can feel every ridge, every vein of his cock rubbing against my walls. We’re truly connected now. Clay’s eyes are closed and his mouth is open in a small ‘o’ as he enters me. He exhales slowly when his balls press up against me and I shift my hips to let him get a tiny bit deeper. His long, slow thrusts travel straight through me and I feel myself contract around him. His weight is on me and I can feel his breath on my shoulder as he grunts with every hard thrust. My entire body is screaming with me and I erupt into another orgasm. The tightening and contracting of my walls around his cock make him even harder. He groans and thrusts harder, faster until I can feel his cock pumping his seed into me. I can’t stop panting, it feels so good to have him inside me like this. I can feel every movement of his, I can feel the exact moment his orgasm fills me. Clay lays against me and our sticky, sweaty skin connects us everywhere. He rolls over beside me and onto his back, extending an arm for my head to rest on his shoulder. We stay like that for a few moments, saying nothing to each other. I can feel every breath and every heartbeat of his. I don’t want to move. “I wasn’t expecting that,â€� he says. “Neither was I, but I liked it.â€� He turns his head and wraps his other arm around me, tenderly kissing me once again. It feels good to next to him. My heart twinges when I think of his plans to move to Seattle, and I know that we can’t keep avoiding the topic. For now I just rest in his arms. Chapter 40 – Clay
I wake up and realise I’d fallen asleep. Val is sleeping next to me and has the most peaceful look on her face. Her arm is flung across my chest and I run my fingertips along the length of it. She shivers and wakes up gently. I turn my head to look at the bedside clock. “What time is it?� she asks sleepily. “It’s 6
:30pm,� I respond. “I’m starving.� Her voice is muffled into my shoulder “What else is new,� I say laughing. “You’re always hungry.� She groans in response. “So am I. We should get up.� I follow her to the bathroom and we jump in the shower together. I grab a loofah and soap it up before turning towards Val. I start with her back and shoulders, moving down over her perfect ass. The suds cover her body and I turn her around. I scrub her collarbone down to her chest, circling her breasts and massaging them as I move over her stomach. I move the loofah over her mound, washing between her legs and then lean down to wash the rest of her. She places a small foot on my leg and I soap it up. I love the way she giggles when it tickles her. She rinses off and takes the loofah from me. It feels so good, so intimate to be in the shower here with her. She runs her hands over me, making sure to wash my body from head to toe. It feels like a new beginning. If I thought we were connected before, this afternoon has shown me what true intimacy feels like. When we’re clean we both rinse off again and step out of the shower. The steam fills the bathroom and the mirror fogs up as soon as we step out. Val hands me a towel and I dry myself. Something so simple as showering together has never made me feel as good. I like being around her, being close enough to touch, being comfortable enough with each other to wash together. I didn’t think I wanted it until I almost lost it. We get dressed quietly, sneaking glances at each other. When she walks by with those tight jeans on I can’t resist smacking her ass. She giggles playfully. “Now now, Clay. None of that. It’s food time.� We head out together into the fresh evening air. It’s nice to get out, to walk together. I like having her beside me when we walk down the street. I feel proud to be the man next to her. I see how all the guys check her out and then glance at me and it makes my chest swell up with pride to be the one she chose. I grab her hand in mind and it fits perfectly as we stroll around the corner to the local pasta place. “Another gem,� Val says proudly when we get there. “Doesn’t look like much but they make all their own pasta fresh in-house and have the best meatballs you’ll ever taste.� “I think I have the best meatballs you’ll ever taste, but we can leave that open to discussion,� I respond. She laughs and elbows me lightly in the ribs. I’ll say anything to make her laugh, to see how it brightens her whole face. I love when she finds something really funny and her whole body shakes with laughter in the most infectious way possible. It’s cute and sexy and endearing at the same time. I smile and open the door to the restaurant for her, happy to be here together. We sit down at the table and I’m finding it hard to focus on the menu. I keep thinking about the way it felt to be inside her, to feel the real her like that. The raw her. She catches me staring at her and sticks her tongue out at me. The waiter reappears and Val orders first. “I’ll have the spaghetti and meatballs. Can you make it extra saucy please?� I almost choke on my water and she glances over at me with laughter in her eyes. How is she keeping a straight face! The waiter doesn’t even blink, “Certainly, miss. And for you, sir?� “I’ll have the same,� I squeak out. The waiter walks away and Val breaks into that silent, shaking laughter that I love so much. Her shoulders are shaking up and down and her hand is covering her mouth. The way her face scrunches is the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen. Just when we’ve recovered from our laughter I hear a familiar voice behind me. My heart drops when I hear the overly sultry, honey-sweet voice that reeled me in so many years ago. “Well if it isn’t Clay O’Neill,� the voice says, amused. “Is it Doctor Clay O’Neill by now? And you have a new plaything! How cute.� I turn around and see her. She looks just like she did eight years ago, curvy and gorgeous with sex dripping out of every pore. The only difference is that this time it doesn’t turn me on. If anything, it turns me off completely and my blood runs cold. She’s tall with jet black hair. It’s perfectly straight and falls to her waist. Her features are sharp. She’s beautiful, but looking at her I feel nothing but disgust. She does nothing for me except fill me with dread. Val is looking at her and then me, waiting for an explanation. “Caroline. This is Val and she’s not my plaything.� I know my voice is excessively curt. Caroline extends a long hand and I see the vermillion polish on the end of her fingers, each nail sharpened to a point. Claws, I think. Seems appropriate. Val reaches up and shakes her hand gently and I resist the impulse to shudder when the two of them touch. “It’s nice to meet you,� Val says politely. I can’t help but feel like her voice is a breath of fresh air after the honeyed, sticky sweetness of Caroline’s drawl. “So what stories has Clay here been telling you. I’m sure he’s mentioned me,� she says with a sly smile playing over her lips. She looks at me and raises a thin eyebrow. “No, actually, he hasn’t. How do you guys know each other?� “Oh, you know,� Caroline responds casually, waving her claws in the air by her head. She uses her hand to move her long hair behind her shoulder. “We dated for a few years, back when he was a stripper.� Val’s eyes widen and she looks at me in shock. I glance at Caroline and open my mouth to tell her to be quiet. She continues before I can jump in. “What, he didn’t tell you? Yeah, he didn’t tell me either. Then I found out he had girls all over him. It’s what broke us up. He just couldn’t keep his hands to himself.� Val’s jaw is hanging open and she closes it, only to let it fall open again. Her eyes are burning through me, I can see the betrayal in them. “Val..� I start. “Don’t listen to her. It’s not true.� Caroline shifts her hips and places a hand on my shoulder. I flinch away.
Knocked Up... Again!: A Secret Baby Second Chance Romance Page 31