Ella screeched loudly as she made her way into the room, causing John to laugh. I, on the other hand, could produce no sound from my mouth. I barely registered that I was crying until I felt the warm tears slide down my cheeks.
“Mom, this is Lena and Gabriella,” he introduced us to the white haired woman on the couch. “Lena, Gabriella, this is my mom. She moved in when the twins were born to help out.”
“I’m Ella, and that’s Lena,” Ella said, gesturing to us as she sat on the floor next to the baby boy, who had wisps of brown hair on his otherwise bald head.
John’s mom smiled at us and said, “Nice to meet you.”
John stared his mom in the eye meaningfully as he said, “These are Christine’s oldest children.”
His mom widened her eyes and stared between us. “Isn’t that wonderful,” she said. Then she looked at me and used her head to gesture toward the seat next to her on the couch.
I slowly went to sit, and as I did so I stared at the baby she was holding on her lap. The little brown haired girl stared back at me with a toothless smile on her cherubic face. She screeched and babbled and then began bouncing on her grandmother’s thighs animatedly.
“This is Cameron,” she said, lifting the baby and handing her to me.
I wiped my eyes and smiled as I took her. She was so chubby that she had dimples in her hands. Cameron babbled loudly, and drool dripped from her little mouth and onto her bib that said, ‘Daddy’s #1 Girl’.
John’s mom looked down at the floor where Ella was happily playing with the little boy; our little brother, Taylor. She was holding his hands in hers and helping him stand. He looked exactly like I had imagined, fair skinned with tiny bowed lips that were a smaller version of my mom’s, fat cheeks, and wide eyes. “That’s Taylor,” she said, smiling as she watched us with the twins.
Ella had tears streaming down her face now, and her cheeks were so red that they matched her hair. “I should’ve worn waterproof mascara,” she said.
I laughed, sitting Cameron down on my lap so I could wipe the tears away. “Me too.” Then I looked into Cameron’s wide blue eyes. “Hi Cameron,” I cooed, bouncing her on my thighs.
She babbled a stream of incoherent words back at me.
John took a seat on the floor by a motorized car that neither of the twins were big enough to use yet. “The perks of having twins? There’s one for each of you to hold.”
On the floor, Taylor let out a screech and began trying to jump. Ella just laughed and helped him by raising him up each time he would have come off of the ground.
I stroked Cameron’s wispy brown hair with one hand, continuing to smile so hard that my cheeks burned. “They’re beautiful,” I said to no one in particular. I had been sure that I had two little brothers somewhere, but this was even better. I had the best of both worlds—a little brother and another little sister.
This was the happiest moment in my life.
Chapter 15
“Why are we sitting out here?” Ella groaned, wiping sweat from her head with a hand towel. “It’s hot as hell out here. I feel like I’m going to melt into a puddle.”
“Only witches melt into puddles, and that’s from water not the sun,” I responded. “Just avoid water and you’ll be fine,” I joked, earning a hit from her towel.
We were sitting in lawn chairs in the front yard. I was trying to tan, while Ella was complaining constantly, like she was being forced to sit out here with me.
“Ha ha, aren’t you a comedian,” she said with sarcasm dripping from her words.
“If you’re so hot then go inside.”
Ella groaned. “But I want to talk to you.”
“Then talk,” I urged. I swiped my damp hair from one shoulder to the other and leaned back, pulling my shades down from where they were tucked into my hair. Now the world was tinted a shade of red. I liked it better this way.
“I think John still has feelings for Mom.”
I laughed. “Yeah, that was pretty obvious by the way his face lit up when we mentioned her.”
“I know. It’s been a year and he’s still not over her.”
I bit my lip. Sometimes it takes longer than a year to get over someone. I knew that for a fact. You may think that you’re over them, but when you see them again all of your old feelings can just rush back. “She’s the mother of his children,” I responded.
“She chose us over them. That’s gotta hurt.”
I nodded, trying to think about how hard that must have been to be rejected like that. For all I know, she hasn’t been in contact with him since the twins were born ten months ago. John wasn’t even aware that she was back in town until we told him why we were here for the summer. He had assumed that we were visiting our grandparents. “I bet Mom beats herself up about that. From the way she acts, I bet she wants to contact him and be in their lives, but she doesn’t know how John will react.”
Ella held her hand out and examined her nails as she said, “He seems like a nice enough guy. I retract my prior statement about him being a tool.”
“I do too. He didn’t have to let us meet the twins, but he did.” I couldn’t help the smile that appeared at the thought of Taylor and Cameron. John had told us everything about them that he could think of to make us feel like we hadn’t missed anything. Taylor was born five minutes before Cameron. He was a long, skinny baby, while Cameron had been short and fat. Our mom had let him name them both, so he named Taylor after his late father, and Cameron because he always liked unisex names. Her nickname was Cammie, though.
“I want to go see them again,” she stated. “I want them to be permanently in our lives, and to grow up knowing that we’re their older sisters, and we would do anything for them.”
“I’m sure John will let us see them again, but I don’t know how we could get that last part to happen.”
Ella smirked. “I know how. It’s obvious. John isn’t over Mom, and I’m sure Mom wants to be in their lives. She loved him. All we have to do is get them back together.”
“I don’t know,” I said hesitantly. “I’m not a matchmaker.” I can barely handle my own problems. How would I fix someone else’s? “Besides, haven’t we intruded on Mom’s life enough for one week?”
“But Lena, what if it could help Mom for the better? Maybe she wouldn’t be so depressed if she was in the twin’s lives, and was back with John. She wouldn’t be restricted by marriage anymore.”
I was about to respond when someone said, “Hey.” I turned my attention from Ella to Carter, who was standing on the sidewalk in front of the house.
“Hey Carter,” Ella responded, glancing sideways at me and smiling. She hurriedly pushed herself up and out of her chair. “I, uh, need to pee,” she said. “Nice to see you again, Carter,” she called out behind her as she hurried inside the house, leaving us alone.
“I didn’t mean to make her leave,” Carter said. I almost groaned at the fact that he wasn’t oblivious to her leaving in order to give us privacy.
I nodded, not knowing what to say. So instead of speaking, I just patted the now empty seat next to me. He sat down.
He was quiet for a second so I spoke up, saying what was on my mind. “I thought you were going to call?” Not just show up, I thought.
Carter turned his head to me and smiled, showing off the dimples that dotted each cheek. He was two shades darker than when I saw him a few days ago on the beach.
He lowered his head, and sighed. “Yeah, well, I decided to come by. I feel like we have a lot of things that we left unsaid the other day, and I don’t think we can move on without talking everything out. Certain things should be said in person.” When I met his eyes, he gave me a soft smile.
I instantly got nervous, knowing that he was referring to how I ended things. He wanted me to answer some questions, and clear up the reasons why I said what I said and ended things with him. Now all of my reasons seemed stupid. I couldn’t think of one good thing that truly couldn’t be worked through.
Nonetheless, I still opened my mouth and apologized, just as Carter opened his to say the last thing that I thought he would.
“I’m sorry.”
“I want you back.”
“Wait, what?” I said after his words had registered in my mind. Now I was confused.
Carter stood, lifting the chair with him and turning slightly to be closer and facing me before he sat back down. He reached for my hand, and then gripped it tightly in his. My palms were sweaty from the heat, but my hands felt nice in his. They were large, and comforting. He rubbed his thumb over the back of my hand slowly as he said, “I remember everything you said to me last year before you left, but I don’t care. We were so close for a long time, and then you left and I didn’t hear from you for months. It was torture. I tried to move on when you left, but I just couldn’t get over you.” He squeezed my hand. “I even went on a date with April a few months ago as a last resort to try and get over you. That was very…” he trailed off as he searched for the right word. “Awkward.”
I forced an amused smile to cover up the annoyed feeling that washed over me. April was one of the girls that hung out with Carter’s group. She was gorgeous. Short, curvy, and naturally tan, with thick, curly hair that stopped at her shoulders. She was mixed; her mom was black, and her dad was El Salvadorian. All of the boys thought she was so exotic, but in reality she’s just a bitch. She never liked me—not even before I was dating Carter. I bet she felt smug about finally getting to go on a date with him. I couldn’t help but be satisfied that he hadn’t been interested in her. Ha.
“What was awkward about it?” I asked, although I truly didn’t care as long as it hadn’t worked out.
Carter’s cheeks burned, and he looked at his feet, then looked up and met my eyes. “Don’t laugh,” he ordered. “And also, don’t be mad. We were broken up, and I was trying to get you out of my mind.”
I nodded slowly, hoping this wasn’t headed where I thought it was.
He sighed, and shook his head slowly. “We had sex after our first date, and I started to call her Lena before I caught myself.”
My eyes widened, and before I could stop myself I let out a loud laugh. The idea that she had been so easy was funny, but so was his almost name slip. Carter and I had only slept together once. It was right after my parents told me we were moving. It had been both of our first times. I was a little hurt that he had slept with someone else so easily, but I had broken up with him, and moved across the country. I didn’t expect him to wait for me, and he didn’t expect me to wait for him. I just hadn’t had a connection with any guys other than him.
Carter scowled at me. “I said not to laugh.”
“I couldn’t help it. It was pretty funny.”
“No, it’s not. I felt like shit afterwards. I think she really liked me, and I used her.” He sighed and ran his hand through his hair.
I squeezed his hand. “You’re a good guy. I’m sure she got over it.”
He nodded in response. “She did. She still talks to me; we just pretend like it never happened. At least, I do.”
I didn’t want to ask what that meant. Instead, I said, “I am sorry though.” He stared into my eyes. “About what I said before I left,” I clarified.
Carter nodded.
He didn’t say anything, so I continued. I felt like I needed to make him understand. I didn’t want him to think that I had ended things because I no longer had feelings for him, because from the way just holding his hand shot tingles up my arm, I knew that wasn’t true. “I didn’t think I would be coming back. When we left, my parents said we were done with California. My grandparents would come see us, not the other way around. So I was scared we wouldn’t see each other again, and I didn’t want you to wait around for me if we couldn’t make it work out. Long distance relationships kind of scare me, and I had been going through so much emotional stress already. So, I just said whatever I could to try and make you hate me enough to no longer want to be with me. I’m so sorry.”
Carter nodded slowly. Then, he stood to his feet, and pulled me up as well. He held me at arm’s length as he said, “Yeah, I figured that out. I know you well enough to realize you were trying to hurt me. That doesn’t mean that it didn’t hurt, because it did, but I just felt better knowing that it wasn’t how you truly felt.”
I stood in front of him, staring into his eyes. The streaks of green and speckles of gold were mesmerizing.
“I want to make it work now,” he said quietly. It came out almost as a whisper.
“But I leave again at the end of summer.”
“I know, but your mom is here now, so you’ll have to come visit.” He looked so hopeful. It was so cute.
I didn’t know what to say. I was lost in my thoughts. Could I make a long distance relationship work? Could we just have this summer, if I couldn’t?
When I didn’t say anything, Carter’s face fell. “I get it if you don’t have an answer for me right now. I just wanted to be with you again.” He shrugged, dropping his hands from my arms. “Just call me when you make a decision.” And with that, he left. I watched him walk down the street with his head held low until he disappeared around the corner.
I hadn’t even realized that Ella had joined me until she said, “That’s the smell of defeat. Poor guy. You should give him another chance.”
Chapter 16
Ella skipped ahead of me, her black flip-flops slapping the wooden boardwalk as she went. “I want some fries,” she called back to me, turning her head over her shoulder and smiling innocently.
“I’m not buying you any fries,” I responded. “You know that.”
She groaned and came to a standstill. “You’re stingy with your money.” She crossed her arms.
I laughed. “Sure am. Especially when you have your own money and you purposefully leave it at home.” She had the idea that she would save up as much money as she could from the money Dad had given us so that she wouldn’t be broke when school started.
“But I want some fries. You’re my older sister, you can’t let me starve.” She pouted, poking out her bottom lip, but I wasn’t falling for it.
“That’s what you said about the ice cream, the pizza, and the chicken kabobs I refused to buy you.”
She rolled her eyes. “That’s only because you’re saying no to everything. That slice of pizza was bigger than my head. It could’ve lasted me all day.”
“Yeah, well, if you’re so hungry then let’s go home.” I waved Grandpa’s car keys from their lanyard.
“I’ll pass,” she responded, just like I had predicted she would.
We’ve been trying to stay out of the house since Mom had caught us with her journal because she was still angry. She spends a lot of time in her room, and whenever she comes out to use the bathroom she has tearstains on her cheeks and puffy eyes. I truly didn’t realize she would be this angry. I understood her initial anger, but it was a week later. Why was she still so sad? My grandparents have been trying to get her to see her therapist, but she refuses to leave the house, so instead we called her doctor and got procedural instructions to follow on how to behave around her. We have to check in on her every hour so she knows we care, and so that we can keep an eye on her.
“Gabby!” a voice screamed from behind Ella.
Ella spun around and screeched when she saw three girls approaching her.
I only remembered the name of one of them, Trinity, who was standing in the middle with a huge smile on her pretty face. She had a flawless olive complexion, and long black hair that was always in tight, natural curls. She was tall, thin, and very friendly. I had been in the same grade as her two older sisters, Miya and Tammy. They were a nice family. Ella had been friends with them since elementary school, but they had gone separate ways in high school for a while before becoming friends again at the end of the year. I hadn’t known that she had kept in touch with anyone from our old life. I sure hadn’t.
“Hey guys!” Ella yelled, running to hug the girls.
“Oh-Em-Gee,” said the muscular girl on the right, who was grinning widely. She had a pretty chestnut skin tone, and muscular legs that were covered by a pair of athletic shorts.
“I knew you were back but I didn’t think we would run into you!” screamed the one on the left. She had smooth brown skin, and her hair was done in individual braids that were pulled up into a neat bun. She was nearly as tall as Trinity was, and was wearing a T-shirt that said, ‘I can’t hear it unless you cheer it!’
Trinity clapped her hands excitedly. “You have to walk the boardwalk with us. We’re looking for a new bathing suit for Tia.” She smiled at the cheerleader. “And Preshá wants to find a pair of pink knee-high socks for her breast cancer awareness soccer tournament this weekend.”
Ella glanced back at me with a begging look on her face. “Do you mind?” she asked.
I shook my head no. “Not at all. I’m going to find a spot on the beach right here, and sit for a while. Just come find me when you guys are done.”
“Thanks,” Ella called as they headed off, everyone talking at once.
I smiled as I watched them walk off. I was glad they had kept in touch, and I wished that I had kept in touch with some of my friends.
Once their group had disappeared into the steadily growing throng of people who filled the boardwalk, I found an entrance to the beach and went to find a spot to sit. The first thing I did after I sat down was scribble my name into the sand.
I had so much to think about with everything that was going on, and it seemed like I never had any time to just sit and think. I had been in San Diego for nearly a month now, and I had already run into two people from my past: Eleanor and Carter. My plans of lying low and going home without seeing anyone had been ruined, but I was also reminded of what life had been like here.
Scarlet Awakening (Sweet Secrets #2) Page 9