Is It Wrong to Try to Pick Up Girls in a Dungeon?, Vol. 12

by Fujino Omori

  “Big brother…You were right. Thank you…for fighting for all of us.”

  He buried his face happily in my stomach, and his words…saved me.

  Like the others, he doesn’t know a thing about the Xenos. But to me, it sounded almost like he was affirming the existence of Wiene and Lido and all the others. There were definitely tears in my eyes as I quietly hugged him and returned him to the group.

  “…”

  Now, I stand here on the city walls thinking back on that scene while enjoying the sensation of the wind blowing between the parapet and the path. Slowly, I turn around.

  I sense a presence and hear the footsteps of two people. A moment later my visitors appear at the top of the steps leading to the upper level of the wall.

  “Hey there, Bell.”

  “Sir Hermes…”

  The god with yellow-orange hair is with his follower Asfi. He lightly tips his feathered traveler’s cap in greeting.

  Just then, I notice something.

  “Um…What is that red mark on your face? It looks like someone kicked you…”

  “I stopped by your home on my way here…Ha-ha, when I met Hestia she drop-kicked me.”

  I break into a sweat at the unexpected mention of a dropkick right as Asfi lets out a sigh. Hermes—with the imprint of Hestia’s foot clear on his handsome face—laughs hollowly. But it’s easy for me to guess why Hestia acted so violently.

  “Bell—I’m sorry.”

  As if he’s read my mind, Hermes straightens his back and apologizes to me. Then he holds his cap to his chest and bows, looking for all the world like a nobleman. I stare at him. Asfi seems surprised, too, apparently not expecting this, either.

  “I wanted to apologize about the incident with the Xenos. I used Gros and the other monsters even though I knew it would hurt you.”

  Five days ago, after sending off Wiene and the others, I fought against Gros and the winged Xenos. I know now that was part of Hermes’s plot. He backed the Xenos into a corner and hoped I would destroy them. No doubt Hestia attacked Hermes when he showed his face at our home because she was mad about his scheming.

  But Hermes doesn’t tell me why he did it. All he says is, “Do you hate me?”

  “…I don’t know,” I answer honestly. “I can’t forgive what you did to Gros and the others…but you’ve saved the goddess and me many times in the past. I…don’t know what to think.”

  Was he simply acting with the capriciousness typical of a deity and enjoying the situation as a welcome distraction? If he claimed that, I might believe him. But instincts say that he wasn’t helping us and acting behind the scenes merely to amuse himself. I think he was acting in line with a certain ideal or his own Will.

  Hermes rises from his bow and smiles at my response.

  “If you don’t forgive me, that’s fine, too. You don’t need to understand me. But—I’m probably going to keep on meddling in your life. I know you might resent me for it now, and later as well.”

  “Why?” I ask.

  “Well…because I’m a fan of yours.”

  I’ve heard that phrase somewhere before. But right now, the expression on Hermes’s face isn’t his typical gentle smile. Instead, his narrowed eyes and upturned corners of his mouth remind me of a deity looking down on his children from the heavens.

  “Anyhow, I’ve done what I came to do. I wanted to take responsibility for my evil plot now that I’ve been exposed. I’ve already made my appearance before Hestia, too, so I’ll take my leave.”

  He replaces his cap on his head and turns away from me. Then, like a temperamental wind, he leaves.

  “Bell Cranell…If you can look at things rationally, I ask you to not hate him.”

  Asfi has remained behind, and for a moment, she gazes at the receding figure of her patron deity like a mother minding a troublesome child.

  “Despite what he did, he was worried about you,” she says before bowing and turning on her heels.

  I watch the two of them disappear down the stairs. Just then, as if taking their place, another visitor arrives.

  “—Well, well. I never guessed my visit would coincide with the god Hermes’s.”

  “Fels…”

  “I see you’ve guessed it’s me. I seem to have poor timing, as the deities like to say.”

  Shrugging off a veil, the black-clad mage materializes from thin air. Fels is wearing a black hood that hides the wearer’s face and gloves of the same color. The ghostly mage turns toward me, still about five paces away.

  “Were you hiding all this time?”

  “Yes…I thought I’d probably fly into a rage if I came face-to-face with Hermes, so I waited until they left.”

  I sure am getting a lot of visitors today.

  It seems Fels hasn’t forgiven Hermes, either. It may be dislike, or perhaps it’s more accurate to say that the mage is filled with complicated feelings toward the god. In any case, Hermes seems to be earning himself a lot of ill will. The image of his wryly smiling face and slightly pained words rises in my memory.

  The black robe quivers as if its wearer is sighing, then Fels’s gaze falls on me.

  “Now that everything is finally wrapped up, I came to see how you were doing. Are you feeling like your old self again?”

  “Yes.”

  “…Your expression has changed quite a bit. The news of your level-up to Level Four just arrived at the Guild…To me, you look nothing like the Bell from several days ago—although of course I don’t have eyeballs,” the skeleton jokes, peering at me in admiration.

  So it’s like I’m a completely different person…Is that really true? I certainly can’t tell.

  What I am sure of is that the desire to get stronger blazes much more fiercely within my chest than it did before.

  “Bell Cranell, can I ask you a question?”

  “What is it?”

  Fels pauses for a moment, then speaks slowly.

  “Have you decided…what to do next?”

  “…”

  I remain silent. In order to catch up with my idol, to keep my promise to Wiene, to settle matters with my rival…I know what I need to do. I’ve already decided. But it takes me a few seconds to put it into words.

  “I’m planning to go into the Dungeon again. So I can…become stronger.”

  As the wind whistles around the towering city wall, Fels stares at me. The gaze I give in return doesn’t waver. The mage nods.

  “You seem to have made up your mind…But I also detect a hint of indecision.”

  “…”

  “I don’t want you to die. Just like Lido said in the Hidden Village, that’s my honest wish. And for that reason, I intend to meddle in your affairs a bit—although I may not be able to completely eliminate your hesitation.”

  The black-clad mage quietly lifts one hand.

  “Bell Cranell, I’m going to give you a reason to fight.”

  Fels points beyond my feet, at the landscape spread out far, far below.

  “You must clear the deepest floor of the Dungeon. If you don’t do that, the human race and the Xenos will never be able to coexist.”

  “…!”

  Fels continues speaking as I stand stock-still, staring.

  “Of course, Ouranos and I will continue to help them…but in the end, if you can’t manage this, then the future we both hope for is not likely to arrive.”

  The deepest floor of the Dungeon.

  It takes a minute for the words to penetrate every corner of my being and for me to comprehend them.

  Slowly, I open my mouth to speak.

  “What…is on the deepest floor of the Dungeon?”

  What is the Dungeon? I’ve posed that very question to the goddess before. Fels answers me in a quiet voice.

  “Your vow…and how you’ll settle your battle.”

  The words, so quiet they are nearly drowned out by the wind, drop in the space between us.

  Fels hasn’t explained the reason why I need to clear the dee
pest floor of the Dungeon, nor how that’s connected to the Xenos. The only thing that’s been revealed is the hard truth, and the Will that most likely originates from Ouranos.

  “Bell Cranell, if you want to help Lido and the other Xenos…then please find a way to keep moving forward.”

  “…”

  “May the light accompany you on your journey.”

  Having finished speaking, Fels shakes out the veil, throws it on, and vanishes from sight. The sound of measured footsteps fades away, and silence descends around me.

  Alone on the city walls once again, I turn and stare out at the scene before me. A huge tower brushes against the heavens, and below it, an enormous maze sprawls across the bottom of the earth.

  On the thirtieth floor of Babel, the titanic structure at the center of Orario, an abnormal din filled the halls. A Denatus was under way.

  Deities young and old, male and female, were attending the so-called advisory council, which was about to begin. All of them had too much time on their hands.

  “It’s been a while since the last Denatus, hasn’t it?”

  “That’s because right when it was time to hold one, Ikelos Familia went and caused all that trouble.”

  “Who could possibly host a Denatus in the middle of such a racket?”

  The meetings were supposed to take place every three months, but due to events surrounding the Xenos, the latest one had been postponed. Now, after repeated delays, the deities were chatting excitedly as they gathered in the large hall. Some were even stretching in preparation, though there was no reason for it whatsoever.

  Hermes isn’t here…Well, maybe that’s for the best. If I saw him again so soon after his visit, I might drop-kick him again!

  Hestia was sitting at an enormous table that could seat fifty. She craned her neck around. She still hadn’t forgiven Hermes for what he’d done, and just thinking about it got her worked up. She scanned the faces in the hall. Loki, Freya, Miach, Hephaistos, Takemikazuchi, and Ganesha were all present…Aside from Apollo and Ishtar, who had been banished and sent away, the crowd was almost identical to the one at the last meeting. But a lot had happened in those three months, including the conflicts between her familia and those belonging to Apollo and Ishtar. Hestia couldn’t help thinking back on the dizzying swirl of events and reflecting on the richness of time in the mortal plane.

  “I am Ganesha!! More importantly, I am the facilitator of this meeting!”

  “No way!”

  “Ugh, if Ganesha is moderator, I’m going home…”

  “Wait, wait, don’t be hasty!”

  “All righty then! I, Ganesha, will recount the recent events in the city!”

  The god in the elephant mask energetically got the meeting started. First came the regular briefing, where information about the city and other locations was exchanged. But despite Ganesha’s enthusiasm, the briefing ended almost before it had started.

  “Any questions? Speak up—I’m happy to answer any questions you have!” Ganesha prodded. The attendees, however, seemed to want nothing more than to get things over in a hurry. This was depressing to Ganesha, who had devoted himself day and night to maintaining the peace in Orario.

  He’s not going to mention the Xenos, is he…?

  Hestia felt slightly apprehensive about the topic, but it seemed that Ganesha wanted to hold his tongue, too.

  “Okay, let’s move on to the Naming Ceremony, then…” Ganesha announced spiritlessly. The instant he did, the mood in the room transformed. The deities were suddenly full of life and exploding with excitement.

  “Yes, finally!”

  “This is what I was waiting for!”

  “It’s the only reason I showed up today!”

  Everyone grabbed copies of the Guild documents that were being passed around the table and eagerly began flipping through them.

  The last page was what caught the attention of many in the group. That’s where they found the information about the white-haired human, hurriedly updated at the last minute by Guild staff, just like it had been at the last Denatus. The Little Rookie, Bell Cranell.

  “I’ve never seen a kid pop up at the Denatus so many times in a row.”

  “Yeah, can you believe he leveled up twice, from Level Two to Three and then Four? My goodness.”

  “Insane!”

  Voices rippled out from around the oval table. They were all exuberant, joyful cheers of support. The goddess of beauty smiled sweetly, while the goddess of tricksters narrowed her eyes and hummed a tune.

  How was the boy able to grow so rapidly?

  None of the deities in attendance uttered such an insensitive question as that. Everyone agreed that someone who had shown himself capable in a decisive fight with the minotaur was worthy of being called a hero. Their grins deepened and spread around the table.

  It’s okay; it’s going to be okay…

  Meanwhile, Hestia’s expression became stiffer and stiffer as the other deities grew more excited.

  Our group is more respectable now, with a big home and everything. Our familia has even leveled up alongside Bell…Yes, things are really different from how they were three months ago…! And my own ability to speak up should be improving, too…!

  The young goddess squeezed her hand into a fist. Dripping sweat and struggling with her internal worries, she focused all her energy on avoiding a title that might embarrass Bell.

  Soon, the Naming Ceremony would begin in earnest.

  “Now then, let’s get right to giving Bell his new nickname!”

  “Wait, let’s save the main dish for last!!”

  “Yeah, someone else at Loli’s place leveled up, too.”

  “Yeah, yeah…that Pyonkichi kid, Wel-something-or-other, right?”

  “Right, then, we’ll start by deciding on a name for Welf Crozzo!”

  “Ignis, the Ever Burning.”

  “Perfect!”

  “That’s for sure.”

  “Yes, it’s decided!”

  “As the boy said himself, ‘This is nowhere near enough to quell the fires you stoked in my heart.’”

  “Oh, I’m dying!”

  “It’s just right!”

  Just like that, the deities decided on Welf’s nickname. Hestia wanted to protect him, but she decided this was better than most alternatives the crowd was likely to come up with and let it go. All the same, it could be quite a blow to Welf…

  She glanced diagonally across the table. The goddess of the forge, her close friend, had carelessly boasted about Welf’s declaration of love before, and now her words had come back to haunt her. Her eyes were fixed in the opposite direction as she blushed deep red.

  “Two people in Takemikazuchi Familia leveled up as well.”

  “The kid from the Far East!”

  “I’d say Black Locks is a good one.”

  “Chigusa Hitachi…She’s shy, but I can tell she’d make a good wife.”

  “How about Love Bird, Takemikazuchi?”

  “It’s better than Eternal Shadow!”

  The Naming Ceremony proceeded without a hitch, and soon enough, it was Bell’s turn. Hestia, who was experiencing déjà vu, inhaled deeply then held her breath.

  The other deities were grinning and murmuring that the crucial moment had come. As they exchanged glances as if to ask who would start the debate—the elegant goddess of beauty raised her fresh and youthful arm.

  “Might I offer an opinion?”

  “…?!”

  Freya made a move!!

  A murmur passed through the gathering. Not only the terrified Hestia but the Denatus as a whole had reached a peak of nervous tension and excitement.

  “What’s this? Lady Freya herself is showing interest?”

  “So you’re a fan of Bell’s now, are you?”

  “I am indeed. I couldn’t help feeling a thrill as I watched that battle.”

  The notorious Freya had finally laid her eyes on the Little Rookie! This was surely a sign of trouble to come.
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  The deities, who had no inkling of Freya’s true involvement, assumed her interest in the boy to be an inevitable development. After all, Bell Cranell could hardly escape the notice after causing such a stir throughout the city. Some of the deities even suspected the goddess of beauty had developed feelings for the boy and watched in amusement to see what would happen.

  Among the crowd, Hestia alone was feeling extremely on edge.

  “Freya…I trust you’ll choose a good nickname for my Bell,” Hestia said with a smile that did not reach her eyes.

  “Now, now, Hestia, comments like that only make me more nervous,” Freya responded, smiling back beatifically. Even the gods, who would normally be teasing the Goddess Loli in a situation like this, were overawed. Had the final battle of Ragnarök finally arrived?

  Freya brought one hand to her cheek and put on a great show of hemming and hawing before finally flashing a brilliant grin.

  “What do you think of Vanadis Odr, Companion of Vanadis?”

  “Hey, Hey, Heeeeeeeeey!!!”

  Hestia slammed both her fists down onto the table with a loud bang and stood up.

  “‘Companion,’ my ass! Bell belongs to my familia!!”

  “What, you didn’t like my suggestion?”

  “What the hell is there to like?!”

  Everyone knew that Freya was an extremely passionate goddess. For the moment, the deities set aside the question of whether her initial proposal was sincere, a joke, or an attempt to meddle in Hestia’s business and chattered with glee. Her supporters were especially excited to see a display of her queenly behavior once again at a Denatus.

  Even though the boy’s patron deity immediately shot down Freya’s suggestion, she showed no sign of being upset. Instead, she smiled mischievously and withdrew her proposal with a sigh and a “Too bad.”

  “That’s no good! Vanadis Odr, are you kidding? You’re way too obsessed with sex, and it doesn’t make any sense anyway,” Loki commented with a roar of laughter.

  “Okay then, Loki, what’s your suggestion?” Freya countered.

  “Hmm, let me think…”

  Dramatically ignoring Hestia’s glare, which all but screamed, Don’t say anything stupid! Loki raised a finger into the air.