“Jesus Fucking Christ! What are you doing here? What is going on? I can’t see this, what are you doing?”
Daniel, please calm down, she said, this time a bit louder. This is important.
“This cannot be happening. This is not you. You’re—you’re—dead!”
Daniel’s mother smiled, although her face was more blurred than the rest of her. Daniel could feel her soft skin holding his hand gently. He could smell her smell, the smell only she had. It was a mixture of ivory with moth balls. He wasn’t sure why moth balls, but it just was—it was how his mom smelled.
Daniel, I am no longer in physical form, yes—
“This is not happening. Do you hear me? This is not happening. I can’t see you like this, I can’t, I’m sorry, I can’t. I can’t handle this.”
Daniel was 100 percent freaked out. He couldn’t breathe. His mind was racing trying to make sense of what he was seeing. She was standing right beside him. It was her and he couldn’t believe that it was her. It didn’t make sense. She had to leave. He needed her to leave. She could not stay.
“You have to go mom, you have to go! Please go. I’m sorry,” Tears now streamed down Daniel’s face. “I can’t, I can’t do this. Please go. Please go.” Daniel put his hands to his face and sobbed.
Shhh…love. It’s going to be all right. He felt her hand softly rub his back.
Then, he felt a slight breeze of cold air at the foot of the bed. His tears stopped and he looked over to the right where she had been standing. Only she was gone.
For some reason, Daniel now felt calm and sleepy. He laid back down, his mind somehow detaching from what had only moments before occurred, his body heavy, aching for the support of the bed. Immediately, he drifted off into a deep sleep. And there, he saw his mother. This time he did not feel afraid. It was only a dream and he couldn’t feel or smell her the way he had before. He was safe now.
“Daniel, there’s something you must know.” This time, his mother wasn’t whispering. They were sitting in the living room where he had grown up, and it felt like the most natural thing in the world that they were talking.
“Yes, mom, what is it?”
“Shelby is the girl you’re meant to spend your life with.” She looked at him pointedly, neither smiling nor frowning. She had always been good like that—able to deliver any news with such grace.
Daniel simply nodded.
“I want you to fly her over here to be with you. Call her tomorrow and tell her about my visit. She will understand and she will come to you. It’s time now, Daniel. I didn’t want to get overly involved before, and thought giving you both little hints would be enough. But, you’re both far too stubborn and independent. So, here I am. You cut yourself off from me energetically by blaming yourself for my physical transition. I couldn’t reach you, your energy was so heavy and so filled with self-loathing and grief. Shelby was the opening, so I could connect with you again. The fact is Daniel, you have an important destiny to fulfill here in this lifetime and Shelby is a big part of that. You two need each other.“
His mother got up off the couch and Daniel stood up with her. She wrapped her arms around him and whispered gently in his ear, “And I am so proud of you. You have become a wonderful man.”
# # #
The birds chirping outside his window woke Daniel up. He could still feel her arms wrapped around him and the beauty of her words. Tears streamed down his face, and although he attempted to wipe them away, they kept flowing. It was as if he had been crying all night in his sleep. Daniel rubbed his eyes as the details of the night became more clear to him.
His mother, his dead mother, had visited him from the other side. And while she had tried to give him a message in-person, because he wasn’t able to handle that type of communication, she penetrated his dream and gave him the message that way. Either way, what had occurred was real, Daniel could not deny that. His mind drifted briefly to Shelby, and how he had reacted so negatively by pushing her away when she shared the messages she was receiving from his mom, as well as when she warned him about Kaley. Now, he knew without a shadow of a doubt, that it was true. Shelby wasn’t trying to soothe his pain out of her care for him, she was actually communicating with his mom, who was now communicating with him. Shelby only had his best interests at heart.
That stewardess had been right, Daniel thought. Visiting the islands did put him in touch with another reality. A reality in which the veil between the physical and the non-physical was almost non-existent.
# # #
“Housekeeping.”
A knock on the door surprised Daniel. He had opened the windows and was letting the sun pour in, but had not been able to venture outside. From the moment he opened his eyes, he had this unquenchable desire to…write. He had been at his laptop for two hours and could not stop.
The knocking came again.
Daniel got up and opened the door, dressed only in board shorts, his chiseled chest and six-pack abs fully exposed.
“Sorry, I don’t need any housekeeping—“
“Well Daniel, I don’t think there’s any housekeeping at the condos, but tea service is as close as you’re gonna get.”
Kaley Hamilton stood in front of him dressed in a coral halter dress and wedge sandals, along with a tray of tea, scones, and fresh fruit.
“May I come in?
“Actually Kaley, I am really into something right now. I woke up with the storyline for my next novel and I haven’t been able to stop writing.”
“Listen, Daniel, I’m really sorry about last night. I would like to spend some time later today together to talk more. We’re all going out on the boat snorkeling if you’d like to join us.”
“You know Kaley, I’m feeling inspired and want to focus on my writing. But thanks so much for bringing me tea.”
Daniel grabbed the tray and shut the door. He didn’t have time for Kaley’s antics this morning. He had writing to do.
# # #
It was right around 2 p.m. when Daniel stopped writing. He had spent six hours glued to his laptop. And now, he was famished, yet exhilarated. He had never written anything like what was pouring out of him, but he couldn’t stop. He was shocked that what was coming out onto the page appeared to be a historical romance novel. Whatever was happening was not something he was painstakingly crafting, it was coming through him. Daniel had never had this type of experience with writing before. Typically, it was pretty painful and anxiety producing. He usually agonized over the plot and where to take it next. He had experienced that few days before the Willamette Writers Conference, when things were flowing well for him, but it wasn’t even comparable to what he was feeling now. The words flowed out of Daniel and it felt like he was remembering a story he already knew—almost as if he was re-creating a story he had known long ago.
Daniel threw on a shirt and walked outside. Kaley and her crew had already departed and, other than the distant sound of the ocean and palm trees blowing in the wind, the world around him was quiet. He took a deep breath of the floral air and sighed. He had never felt this at peace before.
Just then, he felt his phone vibrate in his shorts pocket. It was Shelby.
Had MOST amazing reading from a psychic @ Saturday Mkt. Can’t wait 2 tell u bout it! Xo
Shelby. Daniel had let himself get so caught up in the novel, he hadn’t taken the time to fully process what his mother had shared with him. Hell, he hadn’t even had time to fully process the fact that his dead mother had visited him. He needed to tell Shelby. But could he tell her his mother’s guidance that they were meant to be together in this lifetime? He wasn’t so sure. But, he did need to get her to Maui to be with him. And he did need to let her know she had been right all along. As it turns out, about pretty much everything.
And Kaley Hamilton—what in the world was he going to do with that nutty lady? He didn’t care how incredible she appeared to be as an agent, he was so angry that she lured him to Maui under false pretenses. Although there were p
lenty of upsides to her exaggeration of the truth: it was gorgeous, he really loved Jonathan and Emily, and Richard and Sarah, and somehow Maui had served as a portal for his mother to appear to him. Even so, he didn’t feel like he could trust her. Wasn’t that exactly what Shelby had said? And she had been right. Daniel knew he could trust Shelby. And he knew he would rather self-publish his books than work with someone who was dishonest. Knowing his mother was proud of him set him free from all of the rules he had created for himself—like the supposition that he was only truly a writer if someone else published his work.
Standing there, looking out over the beauty of Maui, Daniel knew what he had to do.
He picked up his cell phone and dialed Shelby’s number.
# # #
“So, spare no details—is it as gorgeous as the Internet and game show prize offerings make it out to be?” Shelby’s voice was light and full of energy. Daniel immediately felt himself relax; hearing her voice was so soothing to him.
“Well, it’s beautiful, but not near as gorgeous as you,” Daniel couldn’t believe his own cheesiness, but he also couldn’t help himself. The last several days were worlds away from the time he spent with Shelby and now he couldn’t wait to have her near him again.
“Aren’t you Mr. Smooth! What’s that Hawaiian air doing to you over there Daniel?”
Daniel chuckled. Shelby truly had no idea what the Hawaiian air was doing to him. But, he was eager to tell her—in person.
“There is definitely something in the air Shelby, and it’s incredibly powerful. I really want to tell you all about it…but, I thought it might be a lot better if I told you in person.” Daniel paused.
Shelby strained her ears trying to decipher if she had heard him correctly. Was he asking her to come to Maui right now or was she going to have to wait over a week and a half to get the scoop? She remained silent; she wasn’t about to risk totally sticking her foot in her mouth—again.
“Shelby, are you there?”
“Yes, I’m here,” she said quietly.
“Well….” Daniel took a deep breath, Shelby’s silence was making him feel uneasy about what he was about to say next. Perhaps she was still upset after their argument and didn’t want to come to Maui. How would he handle that? Daniel wasn’t good at vulnerability unless he was certain that it would be reciprocated. But now, he had put it out there, and since the whole thing came via orders mandated by his mother, he had to follow through. As he exhaled, he said, “Would you like to fly to Maui tomorrow and spend the rest of the time with me? I found a flight leaving out of Portland tomorrow at 8:35 a.m. And before you respond, I also want to apologize. You were right—about everything—but more specifically, about Kaley. I’m sorry I didn’t trust your intuition more. And I really would love to have you here with me. I regret that I didn’t ask you sooner.”
Shelby felt goosebumps cover her arms and flow up and down her entire torso. Of course she wanted to go! After Daniel’s mother told her she was supposed to go to Maui with him, she had scoped out her available vacation time. As for her boss, she planned to tell him that she had a last-minute opportunity come up that she couldn’t turn down. Secretly, she hoped he would fire her, so she could focus on her jewelry business and collect unemployment. But, either way, she was most definitely going to Maui.
Shelby’s silence made Daniel more uncertain still, so he continued, “And don’t worry about paying for airfare—that’s on me. Kaley’s business account is paying for the condo, so you’re good there, too. Just bring money for shopping and anything else you’d like to do. If you want to go, that is.” Daniel was rushing his words now, trying to get it all out. Now that he made up his mind, he could feel the depth of his mother’s words. Shelby needed to be there with him. He wasn’t sure why, but he just knew she had to be.
“Daniel, of course I’ll come meet you in Maui. I would love to.” Shelby could barely contain her excitement. “And thank you for your apology, but you have to know that I’m the one who’s sorry. It was none of my business. I should have trusted that you knew what you were doing and didn’t need my two cents.”
“Shelby, let’s agree to leave that disagreement in the past. We’ve each owned our piece, but in the future I want to hear your intuitions. It’s my job to learn how to receive them more thoughtfully.”
“And my job to be more gentle in my delivery,” Shelby chimed in.
“Yes, perfect. So we’re settled then?” Daniel was grinning from ear-to-ear. Maybe everything was happening exactly as it was meant to.
“It’s settled,” Shelby said.
“Great! I’ll book the ticket and send you the confirmation. Do you think it will be a problem with work?”
“Don’t worry about that—I’ll take care of it. In fact, while you’ve been gone, I’ve had a lot shifting over here. I’ve got my jewelry line—even though it’s just a few pieces, but growing—on Etsy.com and I’ve got more orders coming in. So, I’m okay if Dillon Turkin fires me for taking a vacation with one day’s notice.”
Daniel had been so invigorated when he woke up that he didn’t fully think through the consequences of Shelby coming to Maui at the last minute. He didn’t want to be responsible for something as serious as her losing her job. He remembered how critical it was to receive a regular paycheck before he started writing full-time. It had allowed him to pay off his bills and save up enough money to feel safe to take the plunge. The realities of his plan began to sink in, as his left brain returned to its familiar place of logic and doubt.
“Well, Shelby, please don’t do this if it’s going to cause problems for you at work. I don’t want you to be without your job and a paycheck.”
Shelby laughed. “Daniel, I’m a big girl and I know it will all work out. I’m not going to hold you responsible for losing my job.”
They hung up the phone with a little tension remaining between them. Daniel worried that somehow he was losing his mind, quite possibly hallucinating his mother’s presence and guidance, and now he could be responsible for Shelby losing her perfectly good paying job. What was he thinking just pulling more money out of his dwindling savings to fly her to Maui at the last minute anyway?
His mind had returned with some serious issues around the events of the past 24 hours.
Shelby felt frustrated that Daniel’s concern was his alleged responsibility if she lost her job. Their connection was so strong, but he seemed to doubt it often or get pulled into his head whenever they came to a new intersection. Why did he ask her to fly over at the last minute if he was going to get all worried about her job? Shelby shook her head. Sometimes she wondered if she had made the whole thing up—visits from his mother, messages from the other side. Was she actually the crazy one?
Chapter 7
“Aloha, welcome to Hawaii.”
Shelby felt butterflies in her stomach as she walked off the plane and into the Kahului airport. Travelers circled all around her, everyone knowing exactly where they were going, and Shelby feeling confused about her true purpose for being in Maui. Daniel had asked her to come join him, then acted flustered, almost taking back his invitation at the thought of Shelby losing a job she didn’t love anyway. To top it off, he hadn’t really communicated with her since their conversation yesterday.
What was she doing?
The job had been a non-issue. Her editor actually seemed surprised that she would make such a ballsy move, congratulated her for snagging a guy that could fly her to Maui and then asked her to write a piece about traveling from Portland to Maui. So, she was still gainfully employed, and her jewelry line was continuing to blossom. Now she was on her way to see a man who she felt intuitively was her next partner. But, did he know it? That was the real question. A question Shelby was intent on receiving the answer to on this trip.
“Shelby! Over here.”
Shelby turned to see Daniel standing near the baggage claim area in the open-air portion of the airport. He was smiling. Shelby couldn’t help but smile in retur
n. The nagging tension she had felt earlier seemed to disappear.
She walked quickly over to him, her blonde hair being softly tousled as a light Hawaiian breeze blew through the baggage corridors.
“Daniel Tillman.”
“Shelby Hanson. I missed you.”
Shelby jumped up, wrapping her arms and legs around Daniel. His hands gripped her thighs, his thumbs rubbing them softly. Their lips met in unison and the disconnect, the tension, and the questions all faded away. Daniel’s lips enveloped hers and Shelby felt herself sink into his body even further. She didn’t care who was watching. This was her man.
“God, I missed you.” Daniel sighed into her blonde locks as he held onto her. “The thing is, I didn’t even realize how much until right now.”
“I know,” Shelby whispered back.
She had kept herself busy while Daniel was away, but she had felt their disconnect as soon as the argument happened at the frozen yogurt shop. Now that they were together like this, she felt her strong feelings for him fully met and accepted by him. In this moment, they were unified and on the same page.
As Daniel set Shelby back down, he stroked her face softly.
“Thank you for coming here to be with me. I’m sorry for being such an ass on the phone about your job. I know you know what you’re doing and I apologize for indicating anything otherwise. It’s sort of ironic, right? Me getting frustrated that you implied that I didn’t know what I was doing with Kaley and this publishing retreat, and then you having to deal with me not fully trusting that you knew what you were doing with your job and coming here. Two different sides of the same coin, eh? We just may be the perfect fit.”
Shelby’s eyes filled with tears. He was not only aware of the dynamic between then, but he was apologizing for his part in it. She couldn’t believe how blessed she was to have such an aware man in her life. Not to mention sexy. Shelby didn’t know if it was the week apart or the fact that they hadn’t had sex yet (probably both), but either way Daniel looked so good she wanted to disrobe him right then and there in the airport. He was wearing blue Bermuda shorts and a white T-shirt with flip-flops—in true Hawaiian style, and absolutely devour-able in Shelby’s eyes.
Following Bliss (The Quest series) Page 10