Anger Is a Gift Sneak Peek

by Mark Oshiro

  “It can be intimidating,” Moss admitted. “I also feel like I should give you a heads-up.”

  “About?”

  “Esperanza’s adopted. Her parents are white, and they’re … well, they’re nice people. Just kind of intense sometimes. They mean well, though.”

  “Ah. Got ya. I’m sure I’ll be fine.” Javier gave him a smile. “I mean, I’ll be with you.”

  “Oh, stop it,” Moss said, rolling his eyes, but he couldn’t help smiling back.

  They made their way inside, through the massive eight-foot door that felt like it weighed a ton. Moss moved to the side in the foyer and slipped his shoes off and gestured at Javier to do the same. There were three potted plants hanging from the high ceilings in the front room, and it made the house seem impossibly larger than the outside led you to believe. Moss could hear voices coming from the next room and, feeling unusually bold, he reached out and grabbed Javier’s hand before leading him into the dining room where their friends were. Javier looked at him, surprised.

  “You gonna be okay here?” Moss said softly. “I know this place is ridiculous.”

  Javier squeezed Moss’s hand. “Yeah,” he replied. “Promise.”

  They walked into the dining room. Rawiya and Kaisha lit up when they entered the room, and the others—Bits, Njemile, and Esperanza—turned around to greet them. As Esperanza got up, her gaze resting solely on Javier, Moss spoke up. “Hi, y’all. This is my friend Javier.” His heart rate sped up, a nervousness coursing through him, but when he saw how excitedly Javier was greeted, he figured that there wasn’t a need for him to worry. Esperanza slid up next to him, her face close to his.

  “He’s still hot,” she whispered.

  “I know, right?” Moss whispered back.

  She flashed him a grin and returned to the table. As Moss and Javier took the only empty spots, Esperanza’s mother came out of the kitchen, a large Crock-Pot in her hands. Bits rose to get out of the way, and Rebecca Miller placed it on the table. “Is everyone here?” she asked her daughter. “I thought it would be a good time to bring out the chili I made.” She beamed at them, and her dangling emerald earrings sparkled alongside her smile. She kept her brown hair tied back from her face, and Moss thought the earrings looked good on her.

  “I’ll get bowls and spoons,” Esperanza said, rising from the table and then making a silent count of those at the table. When she left the room, Rebecca smiled at the group.

  “I think I’ve met all of you at one point!” she said excitedly. “But if not, I’m Esperanza’s mother, and you can call me Rebecca, please.”

  They all nodded their heads or said hello to her, except for Kaisha, who had her attention directed solely toward her laptop. She simply raised a hand to acknowledge her. Seconds later, Esperanza returned with her father, Jeff, who carried half of the bowls for the table. His hair was lighter than Rebecca’s, but they both looked like all the scientists that Moss had seen in the sci-fi films he’d grown up on. They both had long hair tied back and a fashion sense that hadn’t been updated in twenty years. “Hello, everyone,” he announced loudly. “Welcome to our home!”

  Rebecca continued talking. “Now, I didn’t know what everyone liked, so I figured that some chili would be filling. It’s vegetarian, so you should be fine, Rawiya.”

  Rawiya beamed at her. “Thank you for remembering.”

  “We’ve got some cheese or sliced onions if you want, but feel free to ask for anything if you need it.” She ladled chili into the bowls and passed a steaming dish to each of the people at the table. Jeff had popped back into the kitchen and came back with a tray of corn bread. “My mother’s recipe,” he explained, setting it down on the table. “And she grew up in the South, so I swear it’s good.”

  “That’s what I like to hear,” said Moss. “Nice to see y’all again. I feel like I haven’t seen you in forever, Jeff.”

  Jeff waved a hand dismissively at Moss. “You know how it is with our academic work. It takes over our lives.”

  Bits didn’t even wait for the chili to cool down before they stuffed a spoonful in their mouth. Moss watched them chew it for a bit before they spoke. “Not very spicy,” they said, and then they promptly took another bite.

  “Would you like some hot sauce or something?” Rebecca asked. “I’m sorry, I didn’t want to make it too spicy or anything.”

  Bits pursed their lips. “You got Crystal’s?”

  Rebecca snapped. “Yep! I’ll go get it now.”

  Bits smirked at Esperanza. “Your mom knows what Crystal’s is,” they said.

  “We are only clueless some of the time,” Jeff joked. He leaned in toward the table. “Though she picked up the food habits from me,” he whispered.

  Once the chili was passed out, Jeff lingered behind his daughter. “So what’s the plan, then? Esperanza has given us an idea of what’s happening.”

  “And it’s just awful what happened to your friend the other day,” Rebecca added, returning with the hot sauce, which she dropped off next to Bits. “Just awful.”

  “Well, did your mom give you an address?” Esperanza asked, looking at Moss.

  Moss pulled his phone out of his front pocket. “This one,” he said, sliding it across to her. She took it and nodded.

  “That’s over near 27th, isn’t it?” she said.

  Moss nodded. “We’ve got to get these out before Friday, since the meeting is going to be that night. Kaisha?”

  She took that as her cue to stop working. “Okay,” she said, and she turned her laptop to face them all while pulling a bowl of chili toward her. She shoveled a spoonful of it into her mouth. She swallowed and began again. “The Facebook event page is done, and it’s disguised as best I could as a party invitation.” She gestured toward the computer, and they all leaned forward to get a better look.

  “So, we invite people we know to the page?” Njemile asked. “That’s all we’re doing?”

  “No, but it’s a start,” Kaisha said. “I mean … I’d like it if all of you started using Tor, maybe set up some two-factor authentication on your devices, took some steps to protect your own privacy.”

  They all stared at her, silent in confusion.

  Kaisha sighed. “Baby steps,” she said, more to herself than the group. “The event is set to invite-only; you can’t find the page unless you’ve been invited. I’ve made myself and each of you an admin on the event page so you can invite anyone you trust.”

  “How do we know who to trust?” Bits asked.

  “Do you really think that the administration is going to care about this?” Rebecca asked. “I’m not even sure that I know what you are planning to do, and I’m standing right here.”

  “The point is to get everyone to meet at the Blessed Way Church on Friday evening,” Moss explained. “We’re not planning what to do about the metal detectors tonight; we’re hoping to use the meeting itself to do most of the planning. And we’d just like to do what we can to make sure that the school doesn’t know about it until they can’t ignore it.”

  “Think of it like a meeting of spies,” Rawiya said. When they all turned to look at her, mostly amused, she added, “What? It’s exciting to think of it like that!”

  “We’re not spies, Rawiya,” Njemile said. “At least not yet.”

  Rawiya raised a finger. “But we might be,” she retorted.

  “Nah, it’s more like we’re Dumbledore’s Army,” said Kaisha. “You know, organizing in secret to fight off the Dark Lord.”

  “Now that is a great analogy,” said Moss. “Wait, but which one of us is Dumbledore?”

  “Ew, can no one be Dumbledore?” Rawiya said. “I’d rather not have one of you secretly planning to let us die to beat some snake-faced dude.”

  They all laughed at that, but Esperanza’s father stepped forward. “Why not just make it a public meeting?”

  “The element of surprise,” Kaisha explained. “Moss’s mother was right about this plan. I think this would be a lot mor
e shocking if they didn’t know what we were planning.”

  “Think about how every protest goes down in this city,” Njemile said, looking at Esperanza’s mother. “The police know it’s happening, they show up in droves, it lasts an hour, and it always ends terribly.”

  “You think the police will show up?” Rebecca said. Moss heard it in her voice for the first time that night: hesitation. “I don’t want you doing anything dangerous, Esperanza.”

  Esperanza frowned. “Exactly how dangerous do you think this meeting will be?”

  Moss jumped in before Rebecca could answer. “It’s just a meeting, y’all, I promise. It’s not even the actual protest. Even then … we should probably wait to overreact until we know what it is this protest will even be.”

  Kaisha pulled her laptop back to her, swiveling it around. “I also designed some party invitations with the address that we can print out and give away in person,” she said quickly, hoping to move the conversation in a new direction. “To anyone who doesn’t know, it looks entirely normal. That’s how we’ll get people who aren’t on Facebook.”

  “Make sure to email that to my mom,” Moss said. “She’ll get people in the neighborhood to pass it around.”

  “Can’t she hand it out on her mail route?” Rawiya suggested.

  Moss shook his head quickly. “Oh, no, no, no,” he said. “That’s like … super illegal. I don’t think my mom wants to lose her job over this.”

  As the group shifted the conversation to the logistics of getting the invitations out as quickly and efficiently as possible, Moss reached under the table again to grasp Javier’s hand. “You doing okay?” he whispered softly to him. “You haven’t said much throughout this.”

  “I’m good,” Javier replied. “I’m just getting used to everybody. Watching. Observing.”

  Moss gave his hand a squeeze, and Javier returned it. When Moss turned back to the group, he caught Esperanza’s smirk; she’d been watching them. He felt heat rush into his face, but he was pleased it didn’t bother him.

  The conversation moved along. They spoke about Reg for a bit and Kaisha provided updates about his progress, which wasn’t much different from what they knew that morning. More therapy loomed in his future. “What about Shawna?” Kaisha asked. “I haven’t seen her since last weekend.”

  “Apparently her dad’s filing a lawsuit next week,” Njemile answered.

  “Good,” said Rebecca. “I hope they get everything they ask for and more.”

  “Amen,” said Bits.

  “Esperanza,” said Jeff, and he turned to look at his daughter as if he was asking for permission. “If you don’t mind…”

  “What’s up?” She removed her glasses and set them on the table in front of her. “Is it getting too late?”

  “No, not at all,” he said. “You all can stay as long as you need to. I obviously haven’t talked it over with your mother, but … can we come to this meeting?”

  Moss tilted his head. “Really? Y’all wanna help?”

  “We’ve been out of town a lot this year,” Jeff explained. “And this seems like a good opportunity to get more involved.”

  “I agree,” said Rebecca. “Plus, I’m intrigued. I want to help plan if I can.”

  Moss traded looks with the group. Kaisha nodded subtly, and no one else seemed to indicate that it was a bad idea. “I think that would be cool,” he said. He then added, “If you’re cool with it, Esperanza.”

  “This isn’t your fight,” she told her parents. “You have to understand that.”

  “But we care about it, too, dear, and—” Rebecca began.

  Esperanza cut her off. “I’m not saying you can’t care. I just don’t want a repeat of my science project in eighth grade.”

  Moss tried to hide a giggle, but heads swiveled in his direction.

  “See?” Esperanza said. “Moss knows exactly what I mean.”

  “Don’t throw me under this bus!” he shouted.

  “Oh, come on, Moss,” she said, smiling. “You probably would have told them the same thing.”

  Javier raised his hand. “I’m sorry, I’m new here,” he said. “What are y’all talking about?”

  “Yeah, even I don’t know this story,” said Kaisha. “What’s up?”

  Moss had never seen the Millers act bashful, but they gazed at one another, scarlet cheeks and tight lips, and they looked like shamed children. “We … we may have gone overboard for Esperanza’s project once,” Rebecca said slowly.

  Jeff winced. “We may have projected a lot of ourselves into it.”

  “‘May have’?” Esperanza sighed. “You took it over! My teacher was convinced I cheated for the rest of the school year!”

  “They’re all being modest,” Moss explained. “That was the most complicated eighth-grade science exhibit on soil in the history of the world.”

  “I’m serious, though,” she continued. “If you two get involved, you have to sit back and listen. You have to make sure not to make it about you.”

  Moss experienced a flash of a memory then: Esperanza, days earlier, making the college fair about herself. She takes after them and she doesn’t even realize it, he thought. He said nothing.

  Jeff had his hands up in conciliation. “We promise,” he said. “No going overboard.”

  Rebecca made an X gesture over her chest. “Cross my heart,” she said.

  “Thank you,” said Esperanza. “So please tell me that someone has any gossip aside from all this serious stuff, because I have the best story about this guy in my Algebra II class.”

  The conversation swirled around the table as Njemile, Kaisha, Rawiya, and Esperanza all swapped the latest info they had on their fellow classmates. Jeff and Rebecca seemed to have understood that there wasn’t much they could contribute, and they drifted away from the table and headed upstairs. Javier brushed Moss’s hand with his fingertips, then turned toward Esperanza and cleared his throat. “Sorry to interrupt,” he said, “but I was wondering if I could maybe ask a question?”

  “So polite,” said Njemile. “Please tell me you’re marrying him soon.”

  Moss rolled his eyes. “You’re the second person to say something like that to me,” he said.

  “Second?” Javier said. “Who was the first?!”

  He dismissed Javier with a wave, but Esperanza jumped in. “What did you want to know?”

  “Well, Moss here says I’m bold, so lemme fulfill my destiny: What’s it like having white parents?”

  Njemile gasped in the most dramatic manner possible. “Javier! You can’t just ask someone why they have white parents!”

  He laughed. “There’s no tactful way to ask that question! I guess I just never met someone like you.”

  “Man, you are really forward,” she said. “I respect that.” She sighed, however. “I mean, it’s got its positives and negatives. I was adopted pretty young. My parents immigrated here by not-so-legal means before I was born, but … well, what little I know is that I got separated from them not long afterwards. By … the government.”

  Javier shook his head. “Can I guess? ICE?”

  She nodded. “Again, I don’t know much. Adoption washes away a lot of history, especially from kids like me who were put in the system so early. But my parents adopted me from a state agency, and they’re really the only parents I’ve ever known. I love ’em a lot, and they’ve been pretty awesome to me.”

  “I feel like there’s a ‘but’ coming next,” said Javier.

  She shrugged. “I mean, they can be ignorant like any white people, and I had to teach myself the sloppy Spanish I do know. People question my identity all the time cuz of my last name or the way I talk, but all in all, it’s not the worst thing. I’m lucky to have them.”

  “Cool,” he said. “I’m probably a jerk for asking that, so I’m sorry for putting you on the spot.”

  “And he apologizes before he’s asked?” Njemile said. “Moss, where did you find this fine specimen of a man?”

/>   “Stop it!” Moss said.

  Esperanza smiled back at Javier, a thankful expression on her face. “No, I appreciate you asking,” she said. “It’s complicated, but I do like talking about it.” She leaned forward. “So what are your parents like?”

  “Yeah, we don’t know much of anything about you,” Kaisha said, leveling Moss with a stare.

  “My mom’s great,” Javier replied, smiling. “Dad hasn’t ever been part of the picture. He left a long time ago. It’s just me and her. And she just loves Moss,” he added, reaching over and rubbing him on the back.

  Moss leaned away from him briefly in embarrassment, but it was enough that the others caught it. The questions came in an unending stream.

  “So how long have you two been hanging out with each other?” Kaisha asked, leaning forward.

  “Is Moss a good kisser?” Rawiya asked, her eyes flashing with humor.

  “Is it true that he likes it if you rub his scalp?” Esperanza offered.

  “Do you foresee marriage in your future or are you just testing the waters?” asked Kaisha.

  “You gonna break Moss’s heart?”

  They all turned to look at Bits. “What?” they said. “It’s an important question.”

  Javier didn’t seem to know who to look to, and yet Moss was surprised when he locked eyes with him. “I won’t,” Javier said, a warmness in his face. “Promise.”

  And without any hesitation, Javier began to talk to Moss’s friends, answering their questions as each was launched at him. Moss knew they were being difficult because they cared. But Javier didn’t seem to mind. God, he’s so attractive, he thought.

  The interrogation was still going strong when Jeff and Rebecca returned. Moss was familiar with this particular dance between Esperanza and her parents. It meant that they felt it was time for Esperanza’s friends to head home, but they were so hopelessly awkward that they couldn’t bring themselves to say it, lest they seem uncool. Moss knew what to do, though.