Summer on Main Street

by Crista McHugh

  Birthday. Oh, God.

  “Shit!” Jack squeezed his eyes shut at his suddenly throbbing temples.

  “What?”

  “What time is it?”

  “Uh… Eleven-thirty-two. Why?”

  Dammit. Way past Lindsey’s bedtime. And Beth’s. “I forgot Lindsey’s birthday. Fuck!” Beth had even texted him today to remind him.

  “See? Told ya. You don’t have time to be a dad. Not a good one anyway.”

  ***

  Beth’s phone beeped from the nightstand. She set down the book she’d been trying to read and grabbed the phone. A text from Jack. Call if still awake.

  She stared at the small screen a few moments, then set it back on the nightstand. She knew exactly why he was calling. Too little, too late.

  Lindsey had waited all day for him to call, she’d told her friends at her party how her daddy, Jack-Mack, was going to call on her birthday. She’d even asked to stay up late. She’d finally fallen asleep, exhausted and sad, about an hour ago.

  Knowing she wouldn’t be able to concentrate on reading, Beth set her book aside and turned off the light. She closed her eyes and rolled to her side, bunching up her pillow. She turned to the other side. She rolled to her back and stared up at the dark ceiling.

  With loud sigh, she grabbed her phone and pressed Jack’s number, prepared to read him the riot act.

  He answered in the middle of the first ring. “Beth, I’m a total shit. I feel horrible.”

  The sincerity in his voice deflated her anger like a pin to a balloon. She scooted up against the headboard. “It’s not me you need to apologize to,” she said softly.

  “Is she mad at me?”

  I’m mad at you. She thought about lying and taking it easy on him. But if he wanted to learn how to be a good dad… “She checked my phone almost every hour today to see if you’d called. She was pretty disappointed.”

  There was silence on the line, and Beth imagined him cocking his head, and scratching the back of his neck like he did when he was mad or irritated.

  “I don’t suppose she’s still awake?”

  “No. She’s been in bed a while now.”

  Jack swore under his breath. “God, I’m sorry. This is just the type of thing my own dad used to do to me and I told myself I’d never do that if I ever—” His voice caught. “I’m no better than he was.”

  “Your dad used to forget your birthday?”

  “Every single one of them.”

  Her heart ached for the little boy he used to be. “How did he make it up to you?”

  A dismissive sound echoed through the phone. “He’d have some sort of expensive, elaborate present delivered to me the next day. On my tenth birthday, it was my own race horse.”

  Her brows rose. Wow. “And did that work? Did that make everything okay?”

  It was a moment before Jack said, “No. I didn’t want all those things. I just wanted—” He coughed, probably trying to hide the fact that his voice had caught again.

  Beth thought of Lindsey today, so sad her dad hadn’t called. Now she imagined that happening to her every single birthday. The thought made her want to punch Ed McCauley. He might be a legendary baseball player, but he’d been a shitty father.

  “What would have made it up to you?” she asked. “What could your dad have done to make it better?” She curled into the pillow, tugging the blankets up around her shoulders.

  His sigh was loud in her ear. “If he would have called me and just admitted that he screwed up. And if he’d apologized and told me he wished he could have been with me. Even if it was a lie, that would have helped. He just never put me first.”

  “Then I suggest you call Lindsey in the morning and do what your dad never did for you.”

  ***

  “Payback is a bitch,” Beth said through the earpiece of his cell phone as Jack pulled up in front of Lindsey’s school.

  “I’ll never forget her birthday again. I swear.”

  “I’m sure you won’t.”

  “You’re loving this, aren’t you?”

  “Absolutely. I’m just picturing you in the show and tell line. A pet frog, a new pair of shoes, you, a new Barbie doll.” Her laugh echoed over the line.

  He groaned, just thinking about the humiliation of being “shown off” to a classroom of first graders. When he’d called Lindsey the morning after forgetting her birthday and asked how he could make it up to her, this is what she wanted.

  “I think I’d be less nervous in the ninth inning of a no-hitter in Game Seven of the World Series. It would be easier if you were here with me.”

  “This is one of the few times I’m thankful for my commute,” she said with a giggle. “No way could I get there from the call center in time.”

  “Wish me luck,” he said. “Will I see you later?” He hadn’t seen her since the day he’d snuck out of her house like a coward—the house they’d made love in all afternoon, evening and night. Damn. He needed to stop thinking about that.

  “I’ll be at the shop when you drop her off after school. Have fun!”

  ***

  Jack felt like he was at the center of a very heated congressional hearing. Or the Spanish Inquisition. From the second he’d stepped foot in Lindsey’s classroom, he’d been stripped bare and hung up to dry.

  Lindsey had squealed when he arrived, throwing herself into his arms. While he waited his turn to be “shown”, he sat in the back of the classroom in a desk several sizes too small while the kids showed off their treasures. After a very shy boy showed everyone his most recent Lego creation, it was Jack’s turn. Lindsey ran to him, grabbed his hand and tugged him to the front of the class. He stood in front of the white board as she introduced him as her new daddy. Which had prompted one of the kids to ask if he and Beth got married. Great.

  But luckily, the questions turned to baseball. He could handle that. Easy peasy.

  “Are you not good enough to play in the major leagues anymore?” First question from one of the boys. Hmm, maybe not so easy.

  “Can I have one of your rookie trading cards? I can sell it on eBay and make tons of money.” Seriously, kid?

  “Have you ever been hit in the face by a baseball?” Well, yes. Actually. “Did you cry?” Yes, but just a little.

  “Did you know that Mario Santana has a better batting average than you?” Mario was his backup catcher, while Jack was rehabbing his injury. These kids are six, right?

  “Rowdy Rodriguez got hurt like you did and his game was never the same.” Damn. Are these kids ESPN reporters in six-year-old kid disguises?

  He answered the rapid fire questions as best he could, thinking a root canal might be more enjoyable. Nothing much could be worse than this.

  He was wrong, as he soon discovered when baseball talk turned to what most of the little girls were interested in.

  “Are you going to marry Lindsey’s mommy?”

  “Are you going to buy Lindsey a huge mansion to live in?”

  “Are you and Mrs. Darrow boyfriend and girlfriend?”

  “Did you get Mrs. Darrow a really ginormous diamond ring?”

  “Are you going to buy Lindsey a horse?”

  And on.

  And on.

  And on.

  Lindsey’s teacher, Miss Abernathy, tried to steer the questions back to safer topics, but the girls were relentless.

  “Are you in love with Lindsey’s mommy?”

  “Do you and Mrs. Darrow kiss a lot?”

  Which led Kitty Benjamin—the little girl who’d come to the zoo with them—to say, “They’re probably having sex.”

  Jack was fairly certain his face lit up like the lights at Rapids Stadium. Miss Abernathy gasped and ordered Kitty to step out into the hallway with her, while the rest of the class giggled.

  He was pretty sure that was the toughest moment of his life.

  He was wrong on that account, too, as he learned when he drove Lindsey to Beth’s shop after school. She was working there the rest
of the day, after just working a full shift at the call center. He wished, not for the first time, that she’d let him help out financially. He certainly owed her. And then maybe she could just focus on the consignment store.

  “Daddy?” Lindsey peered at him from across the console of the Audi. It was still so strange to hear her call him that. But it was growing on him. In fact, he realized he liked it. “Kitty Benjamin says if you loved Mommy you’d marry her. How come you don’t love Mommy?” Her big brown eyes were sad.

  Oh, God. His fingers gripped the leather steering wheel and his jaw clenched as he weighed possible answers to her question. What the hell did he say to that?

  “Um, I really like your mom, short stuff. But...” But what, McCauley? “Our relationship is complicated.”

  “What’s complicated mean?”

  “It means... there are no easy answers.”

  “What’s noisy answers mean?”

  Where was Beth when he needed her?

  “Did Mommy make you mad or somethin’?”

  “No, Linds. Your mom didn’t make me mad.” She made him “somethin’” though. She definitely made him somethin’.

  “Then why don’t you wanna marry us?” A little furrow appeared between her eyebrows as she stared at him, expecting him, her daddy, to explain something important to her.

  Oh, God. Us. He was in way over his head. “Um.” He scratched the back of his neck, glad they were almost at the store. He needed help. “Honey, your mom doesn’t want to marry me any more than I—” He cut himself off because it didn’t feel right to tell their daughter that he didn’t want to marry her mom. He also felt the inane urge to cross his fingers behind his back.

  “How d’ya you know? Did you ask her?”

  Shit. Now what? “Uh...” Well, sort of. Then he’d taken it back. He still couldn’t believe he’d kind of proposed. Good thing she had the common sense to tell him no. “Oh, look. There’s a parking space right in front of Do-Overs.”

  Thank God.

  ***

  Zoey barely glanced at Jack when he and Lindsey stepped into Do-Overs, which was odd. Usually, the girl stumbled over herself to be friendly when she saw him, being that he was her boyfriend’s mentor. She turned her back on him as she dusted the display of stuff on the shelf.

  Lindsey raced across the store toward Beth for a quick hug then disappeared into the back room, calling out, “I have to go potty!”

  Beth met Jack halfway across the floor, a wedding dress folded over her arm. She grinned widely. “So? Tell me about show and tell.”

  “It was horrible.” Jack made a face. “I never knew six-year-olds could be so brutal.”

  “Brutally honest, you mean.” She grabbed a padded hanger from a nearby rack, then used it to hang up the gown.

  “I don’t think I can be alone with her anymore.”

  “Her? You mean Lindsey?” Beth’s brows furrowed.

  He nodded. “She was asking me all sorts of questions, stuff a dad should know how to answer, and I just... froze.”

  She adjusted the line of dresses on the rack until they looked just right, even though it looked exactly the same as before, in Jack’s mind.

  “It’s okay to tell her you don’t know the answer to something. She won’t think anything of it. She asked me once why the sky was blue and not green or pink or something. Like I have a clue. So I told her I didn’t know, but we Googled the answer together. It’s blue because molecules in the air scatter blue light from the sun more than they scatter red light, by the way.”

  He shook his head. “Questions like that, the ones I can Google, I can handle. But the ones she was asking were—”

  Beth made a ‘zip your lips’ motion, and nodded to her right. Lindsey had come back into the room. “How was school today, sweetie?” Beth asked, pulling Lindsey into her side for a hug. She was very touchy-feely, always touching those she cared about with a hug, a squeeze, a rub, something.

  Jack wished he was on the receiving end of that constant affection, having her touching him whenever he was near.

  He turned his focus back to the conversation.

  “It was okay.” Lindsey’s voice was quieter than normal.

  “But show and tell must’ve been fun.”

  “Fun” wasn’t the word Jack would’ve used. Torturous, maybe. Hell on earth, perhaps. But fun? Uh, no.

  “I asked Jack-Mack why he didn’t want to marry us.”

  Beth’s wide eyes met his over Lindsey’s shoulder.

  “Questions just like that,” he muttered.

  “You asked him that during show and tell?” Beth asked Lindsey, her tone nearly as horrified as Jack still felt from the question.

  He muttered, “She asked me on the way home.”

  “Mommies and daddies are s’posed to be married!” Lindsey stomped her foot with that last word and stuck out her lower lip into a pout.

  Zoey made a strangled sound and ran into the back room. A door slammed a moment later. Beth stared after her, then held up a finger to Jack and Lindsey. “I need to check on her. I’ll be right back.”

  “You’re not leaving me alone with... with...”

  She leaned in close and whispered in his ear. “This is when you learn the fine art of distraction, Daddy.”

  “How the hell—heck do I do that?”

  She patted his shoulder. “You’re a big boy. I’m sure you’ll figure something out.”

  ***

  Beth stepped out of the back door of the store which opened up to the boardwalk that spanned the banks of the Snohomish River. She’d always thought it a shame that the store fronts on Main Street faced away from the river.

  Zoey also faced away from her, hands gripping the iron railing. Her shoulders drooped and her long, straight hair hung into her face. Beth debated on whether or not to leave the young woman alone, but she looked like she needed a friend. She joined Zoey at the railing, keeping silent as they both peered into the slow-moving waters in front of them.

  “I’m pregnant.”

  The quiet words hit Beth like a punch to the solar plexus. No wonder Zoey had freaked out when Lindsey made that comment about mommies and daddies being married.

  Beth let out a long breath. “You’re sure?”

  Zoey nodded. “I took three pregnancy tests. Bought them in Everett so no one would recognize me.” Her voice sounded forlorn and hopeless.

  “You haven’t told Ryan yet, I assume?” She didn’t need to ask if Ryan was the father, because she knew there was no one else in Zoey’s life.

  Zoey shook her head, then tucked her hair behind her ears. “There’s a rumor going around that he’s getting called up soon.” Her voice caught at the end. “He’s going to leave. Then I’ll be all alone to deal with... this myself.” She splayed her hands across her still-flat tummy as if to protect to her unborn child.

  Beth blinked away the burning in her eyes, and watched a tree branch float down the river. She felt transported back seven years, when she and her sisters had locked themselves in the bathroom and watched the + sign appear on the pregnancy test. She’d been so scared. Felt so alone, even with her sisters’ support.

  “He’s going to be so mad. This will ruin everything for him. I should’ve been more careful.”

  “Zoey.” Beth grasped Zoey’s shoulders and turned the girl to face her. “It takes two to make a baby.”

  “We were so careful, except for that one time.” Her shoulders shook as she sobbed.

  Beth almost groaned. History was repeating itself. She wrapped her arms around Zoey and held her while the girl cried herself out.

  Finally, Zoey stepped away and swiped at her face with her hands and sleeves. “He’s going to think I did this on purpose.”

  Beth had said the exact thing to her sisters. “He cares about you, sweetie. He won’t think that.” At least she hoped he wouldn’t.

  “What if...” Zoey sniffed. “What if he doesn’t want the baby?”

  Beth blew out a long breath. �
��Then you’ll need to figure out what your options are.”

  “What if... he breaks up with me?”

  Beth closed her eyes. “Then he’s not the man you think he is.” And who Beth hoped he was.

  “What if he doesn’t want me or the baby?”

  Then he’s a jerk and doesn’t deserve either of you! “Then you’ll deal with that when the time comes.”

  “Maybe I’ll do what you did and just not tell him.”

  Beth’s skin burned. “That was the wrong decision, Zoey. If I had it to do all over again, I would have told Jack. Look at him and Lindsey now. I should have told him earlier.” She cleared her throat as the guilt threatened to choke her. “But your situation with Ryan is different.” As far as she knew, Ryan had never told Zoey that their relationship was temporary, like Jack had. Zoey and Ryan had talked about their future. Beth and Jack had not. Beth had dreamt about it, and figured she could change his mind about it, but...

  She sighed and stared at the water. And at the bridge. Water under the bridge, how apropos.

  “But what if...?” Zoey bit her lip, as if unable to think the unthinkable, whatever that was.

  Beth touched Zoey’s arm. “Don’t ‘what if’ yourself into making a bad decision you’ll regret later. You need to tell Ryan the truth, then go from there. You can handle whatever happens after that.”

  ***

  When Beth re-entered the store, she saw that a couple of customers had entered the store. Good. Weekday afternoons were notoriously slow.

  “I told them you’d be right back,” Jack told her, “but they said they were just browsing.”

  Of course they were just browsing. The majority of people who came into the shop were “just” browsers. Unfortunately. But she’d worry about the slow state of their business later. Beth put on her happy face and greeted the women whom she recognized from around town. After chatting a few moments, she told them to let her know if they needed anything.

  She headed back to Jack, who stood in the middle of the store with his hands on his hips. “Geez, with all these wedding dresses you should really call this place I Do-Overs, rather than just Do-Overs.”