“Come on. I didn’t come all this way just to let all this lobster go to waste.”
His voice was several degrees lighter. Hayden opened her eyes and found him smiling at her.
“I guess I’ll have to be patient,” he conceded. “Now please show me how in the world do you eat one of these things.”
****
After the most satisfying meal Ben had ever experienced, he insisted on seeing Hayden’s lighthouse in person.
“I love the painting you left me. Now I want to see the real thing.” What he wasn’t saying was that he had to see the structure that he viewed as his biggest rival.
“Sure, we can walk over that way on the way back to the inn. It’s a bit nippy, but I’m sure that you’re used to more than a little October wind off the Atlantic.”
They walked hand in hand to the little wooden footpath that bordered the cliffs on the shoreline. Along the way there were built-in binoculars that people could drop a quarter in and see the boats on the bay up close. Clarksport Head Light stood on higher ground, but close to the edge of the cliff. Its west side was cast in a glow of peach sunset, which blended softly with the purplish twilight from the east.
The imposing structure was exactly how she’d captured in the painting she’d given him. The real thing, however, was much more alluring and he could see why she was so taken with it. The grass around the white structure was a washed out green, much like prairie grass, but he supposed that in the summer it would be neat and a bright green that would contrast nicely against the sky and lighthouse.
“It’s gorgeous,” he murmured and pulled Hayden to a stop so he could admire it and the thundering of the waves against the rocks below. The ocean made a crashing that reminded him of a fierce thunderstorm. The expanse was as impressive as any sight he’d seen. He’d been down to the coast of Florida and California before, so the he wasn’t completely unfamiliar with the ocean, but the wildness of this coast was unexpected.
He moved his gaze away from the ocean and looked at Hayden who had turned to face him. Her cheeks had taken on the cherry red glow from the chilly wind off the water. Her hair danced across her eyes and forehead in a curly banner. For a moment he couldn’t decide which was more enthralling, Hayden or the Maine coast. Then Hayden smiled, the tip of her tongue peeking out between her even white teeth and her eyes sparkled like the sun on the water. It was Hayden and would always be Hayden.
“Come on, we’re almost there,” she prodded, pulling him onward. “It’s going to be dark soon.”
He let himself be led on toward the light as Hayden launched into her best tour guide mode, disclosing the history of the building and the surroundings. She spoke with the knowledge of someone who took great pride in her town and for a second Ben wondered about the chances of her leaving this home of hers behind.
“We’ll have to come back when it’s lighter out.” There was an element of disappointment in her voice when they stood at the wrought iron fence that separated the path from a nasty twenty-foot drop down to the querulous water below.
Ben nodded. The salty air was refreshing, but his hands were becoming raw and he looked forward to getting into the warmth. Although if they went back to the inn, he didn’t want to say goodnight to Hayden just yet. They weren’t finished talking, but quite frankly, talking wasn’t exactly the first and foremost thing on his mind. He wanted to feel her kiss again and the pressure of her body against his.
He’d briefly met Carl before they headed out for dinner and had immediately liked the big blond man. He was content that Hayden had a good man looking out for her while she was in Maine. However he didn’t think Carl would be too keen about the other thoughts revolving around his head.
In silence they finished the quick walk back to the Widow’s Walk Inn. Grateful for the fire that burned in the brick fireplace in the living room, Ben got close to the flames and held his hands out to the heat.
“It’s awfully quiet here,” he commented, noticing the lack of anyone else in the house. A light next to the sage green sofa had been left on, but that was the only indication that someone had been in the living room.
“Carl is being kind to us. I’m sure that as soon as we got in, he left for his rooms.” A small smile played on Hayden’s lips and her eyes dipped down in a demure glance at the floor. The pink tint to her face could’ve been the result of the chill of their walk or it could be that she was suddenly shy about being alone with him.
“Well, why don’t we sit down and you can tell me more about your plans for Primrose.”
Hayden got them coffee and then they settled down on the couch in front of the fire. Hayden curled into the crook of his arm and disclosed her ideas, asked for his thoughts and in all they spent the evening brainstorming her ideas for the old guesthouse.
It felt so damned right, the way they were snuggled close together. Couldn’t she see it? It couldn’t possibly be just his imagination the way they fit together so perfectly, the way they could talk as if they’d known each other for years. Hayden just had to see it and want it.
With a cat-like stretch, Hayden yawned and nudged her head against Ben’s shoulder.
“What time is it anyway?” Ben asked. Night pressed against the windows and the fire had died down to glowing embers in the grate.
“Nine o’ clock,” Hayden replied. “Feels like midnight.”
And this is the part when she gets up and says goodnight, leaving to go to her rooms while I go to mine. It wasn’t the happiest thought, but Ben tried to be realistic. Tried not to get his hopes too far up.
She didn’t get up though. “You must be beat.” She let her head rest on his shoulder. He wrapped his arms around her and gathered her closer. An intriguing combination of salty air and wood smoke clung to her and the scent was far sexier than any expensive store bought perfume.
“Mmm,” he consented. As a matter of fact the long day was only just starting to catch up with him. It was hard to believe that just this morning he’d been in South Dakota. “But I don’t think I could sleep for hours.”
Hayden twisted so she was looking at him. There was a definite sparkle of mischief in her russet eyes. “Really? And what do you think you could do?”
Ben took the bait. He lowered his head and took possession of her lips in one swift move. The scent that clung to her also left a taste, mixed with coffee. He took it in, consumed it and her as if she were the sweetest ambrosia in heaven. A moan escaped her mouth against his as she pressed herself closer, dragging her hand up over his chest to the base of his neck. His whole body reacted to the embrace, every one of his senses gravitated to the touch of her mouth, her tongue and her fingers and revolved around the passion that flared between them.
His hand dropped from her shoulder down to her waist, exploring the curve of her body that was so familiar yet so wonderfully new.
Hayden’s mouth swept away from his, skimming against his jaw and down along his neck. Her touch was light and teasing but it did wonders to stoke the fire that threatened to overtake him.
“Sweetheart,” he whispered, trying to be voice of reason where reason hung on by a spiders thread. “We’re either going to have to stop this or take it somewhere else.”
“Your room,” she murmured against his mouth. “Quickly.”
They turned off the lights in the sitting room, put the screen across the fireplace and, hand in hand, went down to the guest room at the end of the hall. Without turning on the light, Ben turned to Hayden and slid his hands under her sweater, pushing it up so, with her help, it was off her body and onto the floor. Hayden kicked it away, busying her fingers with the removal of his shirt. In her haste, three buttons popped off, but he didn’t care. His thirsty gaze drank in the vision of her pale skin against the turquoise material of her bra. Hardened nipples taunted his patience. He ran the palm of his hand over one, up to the strap, then slid the thin, silky band off her shoulder before reclaiming her mouth with hungry urgency.
As soon as fresh
air struck his skin, Hayden pulled him down onto the bed so his body was poised over hers, but with a swift, neat move, she had him underneath her and straddled his hips. She skimmed her fingers up his torso, starting from the waistband of his black jeans up to his shoulders.
The room was cast in an eerie glow of the moon that was somewhere unseen. Hayden’s face was as dark as her hair and Ben longed to see the desire in her eyes, but couldn’t move. Her hands traveled back down to his waist. Without taking her gaze off him, she unfastened the button and tugged at the zipper, pulling it down inch by torturous inch. The anticipation was nearly as electrifying as what he knew would come next. He closed his eyes tightly as her fingers trailed just inside the edge of his jeans. With every touch of her hands, his breath came harder and faster. Just when he thought that her teasing caress would be the end of him, she pulled away and removed her bra then pushed her pants down over the swell of her hips so she was completely naked.
The first time they’d made love, they were both under the shelter of the blankets of her bed. Though he’d touched and tasted her body he’d never really gotten a chance to look at it like she was now, kneeling at his side, soft and curving and tempting.
“God, you’re beautiful,” he whispered and ran his hand up her leg until it came to rest on her hip.
A smile touched her lips as she gently lay her hand over his.
He wanted her in his life. To go to bed like this every night, to wake up to her face and warm, inviting body every morning. He wanted her right this moment, every bit of her to surrender to his desire, and to give into her own. His need pushed and pulsed and was driving him mad.
Making love to Hayden this time was about taking their time so they could discover each other, finding each point of pleasure. Each feathery brush of skin was a promise of love and the hope of forever. Neither spoke, but they didn’t have to, only the sound of each ragged gasp broke the quiet of their night. Ben made love to her like it was their first time and their last. One thing was certain, he was never going to forget this night and he hoped that Hayden wouldn’t either. That she’d see that they were made for each other, belonged with each other.
Gray morning light crept into the bedroom as he cradled Hayden against him. At last she was asleep, her breathing soft and rhythmic. He closed his eyes, but didn’t think he’d be able to sleep at all. Too many thoughts and feelings drifted around his head, not the least of which was his future with this woman.
Chapter Eleven
“Yeah, I understand. If I can get a flight out, I should be there by this evening. I’ll call you as soon as I know something. Okay. Talk to you soon.”
Hayden had heard the high-pitched ring of Ben’s cell phone but had remained under the comforter as he climbed out of bed to answer it. She kept her gaze on his face, the sleepiness in his eyes quickly evaporating into alertness as he listened to the voice on the other end of the line.
A call this early in the morning could only mean trouble and the frown that pressed his lips into a tight line was a sure confirmation. Ben pushed a hand through his sleep-mussed hair, making it stand up in spiky points. He paced the room with an agitated step.
Only when he disconnected himself from the call and sat heavily on the edge of the bed did Hayden push back the quilt and sit up. A heaviness had settled onto her heart. She knew what was coming. Ben was going to leave and as soon as he could.
She reached out and placed her palm on his back and rubbed. “What’s going on?”
Ben shifted on the bed so she could see his face and the worry etched in his handsome features. He pulled her hand to his thigh and squeezed it. “Looks like I have to leave this morning. As early as possible. That was Tuck on the phone. There was a fire on the ranch early this morning. Started in one of the utility sheds and jumped to the bunkhouse. One of my guys is in the hospital. I have to get back and take care of this.”
The initial shock kept Hayden silent for a long moment. She tightened her grip on his hand and slid over closer to him, leaning her forehead on his shoulder. “I’m so sorry,” she said against his skin. “Is he going to be all right?”
She felt the rise of Ben’s shoulder as he shrugged.
“Tuck didn’t know or didn’t tell me. Damn, I don’t want to go yet, but I have no choice.”
Ben pulled away from her, stood up and headed for the dresser where his suitcase was open. He began to get dressed, thrusting his legs into his jeans angrily. Hayden just watched him, wishing there were something she could do for him. Wishing that she could say that she’d come with him. But he didn’t ask and she didn’t offer. She still wasn’t sure what she would do. Having him here, just for the past few hours, however, moved her closer to making her decision. But by the way he was throwing his things into his bag, it didn’t appear as if he was going to ask her to come back with him.
Ben pulled his cowboy boots on then stood and looked at Hayden. She’d gotten up and was getting dressed too, a little more slowly than him, but with the same disappointment.
“Can I at least make you some breakfast?”
Ben shook his head. “I’ll grab something when I get down to the airport in Portland.”
With one step, he was at her side and had her gathered into his arms. She sank into his warm comfort of his embrace, laying her cheek against the smooth cotton surface of his shirt.
“You could always come with me, you know,” he murmured into her hair. His fingers moved up and down her back in a soothing motion similar to the one she’d used on him minutes ago.
“I can’t. Not yet. Not on such short notice.” She felt Ben stiffen, just a bit. Pulling away from him, she turned her face up and gazed at him. There was no sparkle in his eyes this time. Instead they were tinged with regret. His mouth curled up just a bit.
“I understand,” he replied. “But I won’t be back. You need to decide because I can’t go on like this.”
She nodded briefly. “It’s all right, Ben. I know what I have to do.”
“Before I forget, I have something to give you.” Ben released his hold on her and went over to his suitcase and lifted out an old shoebox and handed it to her.
“What’s this?” she asked, examining the ancient cardboard lid. It was worn and dented. Two wide lengths of tape held the top on. It looked like it had been sealed for a long time.
“I don’t know. Jesse asked me to give it to you when he found out that I was coming.”
The box didn’t weigh much and looking at its age she doubted it had anything to do with her latest venture with Gran’s old house and the work he was doing for her. No, this seemed much more personal. Hayden thought of the other little box she took from her mother’s room at Primrose. Currently it was tucked away in an old steamer trunk in her bedroom.
Ben zipped up his suitcase, slipped his leather jacket on and took hold of his luggage. The gaze that he gave her was long and regretful. “Gotta go.”
Hayden nodded again and followed him out of the room until they were outdoors.
The day before had been a display of a picture perfect October day in New England with vivid blues from the sky and ocean contrasting with the fiery brilliance of a few trees that hung onto their autumn leaves. This morning, however, it seemed the color had bled away from the world. A heavy fog twisted sluggishly in the air, condensing over the grayish green grass. A low, mournful wail came from the direction of the head light and Hayden could see the lighthouse’s beam cut through the mist. She hugged the old shoebox to her chest and watched Ben stow his suitcase in the backseat of the white sedan.
“Call me when you get back,” Hayden requested. “Let me know that you’re all right.”
Ben nodded. He seemed reluctant to go and his pale eyes studied her, implored her, to change her mind.
A few steps and she was in his arms, reaching up to touch his cold lips with hers. “I love you,” she whispered against his mouth and pulled away.
“I love you too.”
Ben climbed into th
e car and without looking at her, started the engine and pulled away.
Hayden watched until his car was swallowed by the fog moving in off the ocean, then walked up to the porch, the lonesome call of the lighthouse her only companion.
Inside she retreated to her rooms, grateful that Carl hadn’t yet put in an appearance. She’d have to face his questions soon enough, but for now she had to be by herself. She remembered the box she held in the crook of her arm. Finding out what was inside would be a good way to keep her mind off her breaking heart.
Hayden didn’t move for a long moment. She looked at the box and wondered what in the world Jesse could have sent her. With a sigh, she walked over to the window seat and settled on the cushion and continued to look at the old shoebox, almost afraid to open it. Just one more in a long string of boxes that held bits and pieces of her past, and of her parents’ past.
Gingerly she loosened the tape, lifted the lid off and placed it next to her. This box held letters. There must have been fifty of them. Maybe more. All addressed to Rosalyn Gardner from Jesse. All stamped “Return to Sender”.
The first was postmarked five months before her birth, when her mother was living in Portland, Maine. Hayden slowly opened the yellowed envelope and pulled out the one page letter. A check for five hundred dollars slid out as well and fell on her lap. She hated to read the letter, to probe into the private life between the two, but she did anyhow. The words tried to explain how sorry he was to have left her the way he had, that he wished that they could have ended on better terms, how he hoped the money he’d sent would help her with the baby.
He also asked how she could keep her pregnancy from him. That he didn’t want her to go through it alone and she should come home, that there had to be a way to mend things with her parents before it was too late. And anytime she wanted to come, she should let him know so he could buy her a plane ticket.
Summer on Main Street Page 118