Rejected (Imperfectly Perfect Book 2)

by Lym Cruz

  The sensation was all-consuming. It frightened me. I took my attention away from Ezra and glanced at our surroundings. Although it was dark, with the flashlights, he would see me. I recoiled. I didn’t want to disappoint him.

  “It’s okay.” He lowered his mouth to brush it against mine. “I told you I would wait.”

  I wanted to cry for being so weak.

  “We should get going anyway.” He peeled his body away from mine. There wasn’t any resentment in his voice, only kindness. “We don’t want any wild animals to attack us.”

  Biting back the sadness, I stood. “I thought you said there weren’t any.”

  “Did I?”

  Chapter Eighteen

  Ezra

  Christina pulled up her hair and tied it at the top of her head. I stopped at a traffic light, glanced at her cleavage then focused back at the road. I shifted in my seat restlessly as my mind wandered to lewd places. Then I remembered her aversion when she noticed I could see her. How she thought so little of herself was beyond me. Christina was beautiful.

  “What?” she said looking at her phone. “You’re staring. I can feel it.”

  I hadn’t even realized I was staring. “I want to show you something else next weekend.”

  “Are you my personal tour guide now?” she taunted, locking her phone. The light that was illuminating her face vanished.

  “Something like that.”

  I pulled up in front of her building and killed the engine. This was the dreadful part when we had to part ways. She chewed her lip. I bet she was thinking the same.

  “Spend the night with me?” she blurted. Her voice was full of apprehension.

  “Christina.” I ran a hand up my face. “We have a deal and I don’t want to break it. If you lock me in a dark room and take advantage of me, I won’t have the willpower to resist.”

  “No asshole.” She turned to me, her eyes searching mine. “I want you to stay with me tonight. I don’t want the day to end just yet.”

  I leaned towards her, held her face and slid my lips against hers. Christina reached for me, putting her small, warm palm at the back of my neck.

  “Neither do I, but you have to promise me that there will be no funny business.”

  “Ezra,” she moaned. “Let’s go up.”

  She parted her lips and kissed me. First lightly then more urgently, her tongue in my mouth, her lips tilted against mine, her breasts pressed to my chest, sending an indisputable message.

  “Let’s go up, please,” she insisted. “Don’t leave.”

  She slithered her lips away from mine, moved up from my jawline to my ear. She nibbled on my earlobe whispering, “I want you as I’ve never wanted a man before. Don’t deny me this.”

  Her admission made my pulse thud and desire spread throughout my body.

  She took my hand and placed it on her lap, guiding it along the warm skin of her inner thigh beneath her skirt. “See how wet I am.”

  I groaned, my dick pushing hard against the material of my jeans. Christina released my hand and parted her legs. I glided higher until I touched the hem of her underwear.

  She was drenched.

  Swiftly, she tugged my hand away and leaped over to straddle me. She pulled up her skirt allowing her to adjust comfortably on my lap. The feeling of her body on mine sent a shiver up my spine, but when she pressed her lips on my neck and softly sunk her teeth at a place, I didn’t know was this sensitive, it nearly knocked me off my senses.

  I wrap my arms around her. She circled her hips over my cock and I lowered my hand to touch her luscious, round ass.

  “Do you want me, Ezra?”

  “You know I do.”

  “Then prove it.”

  “Christina, I promised you—”

  “We’re not doing anything, just kissing.”

  She pressed her lips against mine and I parted my own, welcoming her tongue. Her grinding grew intense, her light moans consistent and the kiss escalated to full-blown lust. Her tongue was deep in my mouth, I pulled her down applying pressure on my swelling cock. Then I slipped my hands down her knees then up again beneath her skirt, caressing her inner thigh. She squirmed and undid my button and fly, reached inside my pants and held me in her warm hand.

  “Christina,” I growled. “Fuck, Christina.”

  I wanted to tell her to stop but I couldn’t, I craved this contact. Tighter, she ran her hand from the tip all the way down to my base, and then up again. I glided my fingers under the lace, brushing past her clit, and she winced with a moan of pleasure.

  “Keep still,” I said.

  With one hand, I fisted her hair and brought her lips to mine. The more I circled my thumb on her clit the more she moved, not only her hips but her hands stroking me faster each time.

  Abruptly, she unsealed our lips. Her head flopping back hitting the steering wheel and the horn blared. I chuckled and pulled her skirt up to her waist and she spread her legs even wider. I wish it wasn’t so dark.

  Shifting her panties to the side, I eased two fingers inside her feeling her walls contracting. She moaned and flexed her hips forward. She was a silky perfection. I wanted to put my mouth on her and lick off her arousal but we were confined to limited space. My thumb found her clit again, she cast herself forward, buried her head on the curve of my neck. She took my cock in her hand with ferocity, pumping fast and moaning loudly. Every stroke took me higher. I increased the pressure and pressed on her clit.

  I was on the verge of tipping over.

  Christina quivered. “Ezra—Ezra,” she panted.

  Hearing my name roll off her tongue, craving more made me explode, I thrust my hips and came on her hand. Her body slumped over me and I held her as we both fought to steady our shabby breaths.

  “Do you think anyone saw us?” she said sluggishly.

  It was dark outside, I looked around and there was no movement. “Funny how you only thought of that now, but I hope not.”

  “Ezra ...” She dragged my name a syllable longer.

  “Hmm?”

  “Will you stay with me tonight.” She rested her head on my shoulder. “Don’t leave me alone.” It sounded more like a plea than a question.

  “Yes.” I caressed her back. “I will stay as long as you promise not to seduce me again.”

  Giggling, Christina stretched and then hopped back to the passenger seat adjusting her skirt.

  I pulled off my shirt to clean my mess. “You give one hell of a handjob.”

  She was biting her lip, growing shy again. It was funny how she transformed from a minx to this cute, timid girl. One would never guess she was begging to be touched minutes ago.

  In her apartment, I let her have a shower first, then I did. When I stepped back into her room, I found her sitting on her bed in oversized, pink pajamas, daydreaming with a cute grin on her lips. I don’t think she was aware of my presence. I leaned against the wall, watching her.

  Each day with her was another day I fell for her smile, her laugh, her mean-girl persona. I recognized the feeling swamping my chest. I’d felt it before, but never had I experienced it with such intensity. Or with this deep desire to protect her, and take away all of her pain. Falling for her was not planned. Yet somehow kissing her lips stopped the world from spinning. Around her, I forgot my problems for a while.

  Guilt shadowed my thoughts. Steering clear of her was the right thing to do, yet I wasn’t certain I could. For one, it would break her and second, I didn’t want to. I was being selfish but I couldn’t walk away from her.

  She raised her eyes and her smile widened. “I have nothing that fits you. You’ll have to sleep with a towel around your waist.

  “Or with nothing.” I dropped the towel and threw myself on her bed. It was like falling on cotton candy. The mattress was beyond soft, exhaling, I relaxed.

  “Cover yourself.” She cast a pillow in my direction.

  I pulled the bed sheets up to my waist. “When did the no sex in the light rule start?” Her e
yes wavered back and forth, bothered by my question. “Hey, it’s me. You can talk to me.”

  She sighed. “Since after Denzel. Normally, I’d meet a guy in a bar or club. I’d go to their place—or wherever we ended up. I’d slip out after they’d fall asleep or before the crack of dawn. That way I wouldn’t be there for the rejection.”

  “That’s presumptuous. How do you know they’d reject you if you never stuck around long enough to find out?”

  “I just know they would.”

  “No, you assumed they would. Personally, I don’t think that’s true.”

  We were quiet for several minutes, staring at each other. I ran my knuckles down the side of her face and over her arms. She moaned and shut her eyes.

  “There was a guy, Robert,” she said. “We hooked up a few times—in the dark.” She snorted. “From the start, I told him that I was all about the sex—no strings attached. He agreed and we saw each other a lot. Robert treated me well, even called sometimes just for the heck of it, and we’d hang out without any sex.

  I think I confused his kindness for something else. Later, he met someone. A thinner, taller someone and I was history to him. I wish I could say that he was a jackass, but he wasn’t. When he realized I wanted more, he let me down gently. I just couldn’t accept it.”

  I pinched the bridge of her nose. “Are you still in love with him?” I said the words with ease but my heart was heavy as if being held by a boa constrictor.

  “I never was, Ezra,” she said, smiling. I think I let a loud breath escape my chest as relief swept over me. “I was confused. I never felt half the things I feel when I’m with you. You walk in and it makes me smile. You touch me and it affects my entire body. I trust you. I can talk to you about things I don’t even talk to my friends about.”

  “Are you professing your love to me?”

  “No jerk.” She kicked me under the covers. A blush took over her face. She was so cute. “I hate you so much that I can’t stay away from you.”

  Chapter Nineteen

  Christina

  Quietly, I left the bed before Ezra woke up. I took a quick shower and put on a long, black dress then stepped onto the scale. I was okay with the reading but I looked in the mirror and scoffed, unsatisfied with the person on the other side. I brushed my hair, applied light makeup and swiped on some cherry gloss on my lips.

  When I walked out Ezra was talking on the phone. He blew me a kiss. Foolishly, I grinned. His hair was loose and ruffled and his voice hoarse.

  “I’m sorry,” he said into the phone. “I’ll drop by later in the day. I promise. I love you.”

  I narrowed my eyes with a mocking grimace after he ended the call. “Who do you love?”

  “Jealous?”

  “Me? Never!”

  “My aunt. I should go see her. It's been a while.”

  He rose from the bed, stretched and his morning erection was visible. I covered my face embarrassed on his behalf. I’d never really seen a fully naked man before under so much light. He called my name and I peeped through my fingers.

  “I’m starving.” He ran his hand through his hair, pushing it back from his face. “I think I could eat a horse.” On his way to the bathroom, he passed by me and kissed the top of my head.

  “How can you walk around like that? Doesn’t it make you uncomfortable?”

  “No.”

  While he was in the shower, I ran to a café nearby and got us both breakfast and by the time I returned, he was dressed in freshly laundered clothes. After breakfast, we laid on my bed looking up at the ceiling.

  “Do you have paper and pencils?” he inquired.

  I shifted on my elbows. “I think so. Do you want to draw?”

  He nodded. I climbed off the bed and found a few plain sheets of paper, a pencil and brought it to him. “Lie down and close your eyes,” he ordered, sitting up.

  I knitted my brows. “Are you going to draw me?”

  “Just do as I say.”

  “Why would you want to draw me?” I hopped back onto the bed.

  “Indulge me for a while, and please lie down.”

  Grumbling, I laid on my back.

  “Now describe yourself to me.”

  “What? If you’re going to draw me, I don’t need to describe myself. Are you blind all of a sudden?”

  Exasperated, he said, “Christina, shut your eyes and describe yourself to me.”

  “I have a bad feeling about this.” I exhaled, closing my eyes. “Um, I’m a short brunette with dark eyes.”

  “No. I mean in detail. Tell me how you see yourself when you look in the mirror.”

  I pressed my lips together not sure where he was taking this.

  “Do you trust me?” he asked and I nodded my response. “Describe yourself.”

  I inhaled and blew out a long breath. “Ezra, I can’t do that.”

  “Pretend I’m not here and you’re all alone talking to yourself.”

  “But—”

  “Just try it.”

  “Fine.”

  It was hard finding the words to do what he requested when I had nothing good to say about myself. In my head, the image was vivid, I could picture every flaw on my body. I swallowed down a hard knot forming in my throat. Ezra’s hand skimmed over the skin of my face, calming me.

  “Talk to me, baby, I want to know what you think.”

  “I have straight black hair, past my shoulders. Dark eyes that are too close together, my eyebrows are thick and my lips are thin—almost like a line was drawn on my face. My ears are too far behind on my head. My nose is sort of okay, it’s pointy but a bit stuffed at the bottom.

  “My neck is too short. My boobs are big, huge actually. I have no waistline and my hips are wide. My butt is the size of a bus and my legs are disproportionate, and my thighs are much larger than my calves. My body is covered in stretch marks and I’m fat. My arms are flabby and so is my stomach.”

  It was depressing hearing myself utter those words aloud and I was aware of how I sounded, but I was being honest.

  “Can I open my eyes now?”

  “Not yet. I’ll tell you when.”

  I think I laid there, waiting for about thirty minutes, but it felt like forever, before he told me to open my eyes. When I did, the first thing I wanted to see was the drawing. He rolled off the bed not allowing me to look at the paper. I treaded behind him until he halted in front of my full-length mirror.

  “I want you to look at the girl in the mirror,” he said and I did. It was the same image I saw every morning. “Did you get a good look at her?”

  “Yes, Ezra,” I said melancholically, expressing my annoyance. “I’m well acquainted with her.”

  “Now look at her.” He handed me the piece of paper he sketched on.

  As I fixed my gaze on the paper, there was a silence to my soul. My blood chilled, the coldness bringing the synapses firing in my brain to a complete standstill. Part of it was pain. Part of it was shame. And part of it was being forced to stare reality in the eye.

  The pain, however, smothered all other emotions throbbing within me, quickly building towards wrath. I blinked and a tear fell landing on the page, smudging the outline of the drawing. There was a scream of agony that rippled from deep within, forcing its way from my mouth. It was as if my terrified soul had unleashed a demon.

  How could he do this to me?

  “What the fuck is this?” I snapped, nearly balling the paper up to shove it in his mouth. “Is this supposed to be funny?”

  I blinked faster, sending tears streaming down my face. The swelling in my throat grew larger, engulfing me in suffering. With one hand, I swiped angrily at the tears, but more tumbled down my cheeks.

  “Calm down, Christina.” He raised his hand to touch me. I backed away.

  “No, I won’t calm down,” I roared. “Fuck you, Ezra. Leave!” He perched both his hands on his hips and stayed put. “Did you not hear me? Get the fuck out of my house.”

  He didn’t move. Th
ere was a look of compassion across his face almost as if he felt what I was feeling. That only aggravated my fury.

  With shaky hands, I lifted the paper and gave it another glance. My stomach twisted.

  I tossed the paper at him and then launched myself in his direction. With clenched fists, I punched his chest and at the same time tried to kick him.

  Easily he grasped both my wrists with his hands, crossed them over my body and wrapped me in a deep hug. I continued to wrestle, kicking my feet and twisting as roughly as I could.

  “Calm down, Christina,” Ezra begged, “just listen to me.”

  “I don’t want to hear anything.” Salty droplets rolled down my face and dripped from my chin, drenching my dress. “Let me go.” I sniffed. “Let me the fuck go.”

  “Okay. Okay …” Slowly his grip slackened. “I’ll let you go.”

  When he released me, I added all the strength possible and swung my hand in the direction of his face. The open-handed smack was as loud as a clap when it stung his cheek, leaving a red welt behind. He saw it coming, yet he didn’t stop me.

  The impact hurt more than I’d anticipated. I pumped my fists to ease the ache.

  “I opened up to you and you do this to me?”

  Ezra massaged the side where I hit him. “Christina this isn’t to make fun of you. I would never. Ever. Do such a thing,” he whispered in a soft tone. “Hurting you is the least of my intentions.”

  He bent, picked up the paper and held it in front of my face. “Look at it. I drew what you described. Exactly, how you described yourself.”

  I stared at the paper numb like the world was slowly disappearing before me. Or maybe it was me who was fading away. I was void. The black hole in my heart, the one deep inside my soul, slowly took territory, absorbing me completely. He was trying to prove that this deeply flawed image was all in my head. That I provoked my own suffering and worse, that I was indeed crazy. The confrontation was shredding me apart.

  Ezra

  I waited for the storm in her eyes to abate. My intention wasn’t to hurt her. I anticipated she’d be upset, just not that much. She was tiny but had one hell of a swing and to be honest, I deserved it.