Awaken My Heart

by Maria K. Alexander

  She slid inside the bed and stretched her arms over her head, giving him a sleepy grin. “Don’t be long.”

  Nick smiled and backed out of the room. In the kitchen, he splashed cold water on his face and downed half a bottle of water while considering his next move. He was banking on one thing, and if it didn’t pan out, he wasn’t sure he’d have the strength to refuse her.

  With a second water bottle in hand, he moved to the bedroom. One look and he breathed a sigh of relief. The light from the living room cast a soft glow against her face.

  Fast asleep.

  Nick brushed a hand over her hair and along the side of her face.

  Lifting the sheet, he covered her beautiful body.

  There was only thing left to do.

  It was time for a cold shower.

  ****

  Ashley’s first conscious thought was of the small pulsing pain in her temples. She furrowed her brow and closed her eyes tighter against the predawn light.

  She shifted her legs and paused when she encountered a pair of longer legs intermixed with hers. Then she became aware of a large body behind her, heat radiating in waves.

  What the hell?

  With her mind fuzzy, Ashley forced herself to remember the events of last night.

  Limo…

  Champagne…

  Shots…

  Dancing…

  A hand not her own palmed her stomach, and rough whiskers scraped the side of her neck. There was only one man they could belong to…

  Nick.

  Oh God. What had she done?

  She pushed through the grit and slowly blinked her eyes open a crack. Rather than the soft violet and green comforter of her own bed, she was wrapped in a navy blue duvet.

  And Nick.

  Along with the realization came the awareness of something long and hard pressed into her back.

  And getting harder the more she squirmed.

  Oh God…had they?

  She felt along the top of her thigh, grateful when her fingertips encountered the soft feel of a cotton T-shirt. Where had that come from?

  She thought again to last night—no easy feat—and remembered them dancing at the club and Nick driving her home. Only he didn’t take her home because they were at his place.

  The rest of the details came flooding back. Had she really begged him? Oh God, she had, and hell if it hadn’t been abso-freaking fantastic. And now what?

  Damn Patty for pressuring her to do shots last night.

  Ashley needed to get home, but first she had to escape from his tree trunk of an arm that had her pressed intimately against him. She inched toward the edge of the bed.

  “Going somewhere?” Nick asked, his voice sleep-roughened and sexier—if that was even possible.

  “I need to get up, please,” Ashley said and tried to pull away from him.

  “You’re not going to be sick, are you?”

  “No, I’m fine.” A total lie because Ashley was far from fine, but she wasn’t going to get sick.

  “Then there’s no need to get up.”

  Except there was. How did she tell him she could get all too used to waking up in his arms? It wasn’t real. None of this was real.

  “Stop overthinking, Ash. You’re making my head hurt, and I’m not hungover.”

  “Thinking sort of hurts at the moment.”

  “I’m sure.” The bed shifted from his weight. “Here.” He held out a bottle of water.

  She sat up enough to take a long drink, appreciative of the tepid water that quenched her thirst.

  He held out two pills. “Take these for your head.”

  She obeyed, grateful he’d had the foresight to be prepared.

  “Better?”

  She nodded but still wouldn’t look at him.

  He took a swig from the bottle before placing it on the nightstand. Then he turned her so she faced him. His lower half was clothed, which was a relief, although the way he wore the low-slung athletic shorts was nothing short of sinful. They molded to his fit torso, the silky material cupping between his legs and straining from the bulk of his erection.

  Thinking it safer, she stared at his chest and was reminded of how it felt to run her hands and mouth along all those firm muscles. If her mouth hadn’t already been dry, seeing him spread out like a centerfold would have done so.

  Chancing a glance, her breath caught at his razor-stubbled jaw, disheveled hair, and sleepy bedroom eyes. Yeah, she was in so much trouble.

  He ran a hand along her face. “You’re beautiful in the morning. I’ve always wondered.”

  Her heart pounded. “Wondered?”

  “You left before I woke up that morning. I’d always wanted to know what it would have been like to wake with you in my arms.”

  Her breath caught. “I’m sure I look a wreck.”

  She felt a wreck.

  “Not to me.” He pulled her across his chest.

  His bare chest.

  “Go back to sleep,” he murmured. “It’s early.”

  “I can’t. Once I’m up, I’m up.”

  And based on the thick erection between them, so was he.

  “Then pretend to go asleep.”

  How could he be so casual about what happened between them?

  “Nick, I’m sorry about last night.”

  “For what exactly?”

  “All of it. I got drunk at your sister’s bachelorette party and threw myself at you.”

  “I wasn’t complaining.”

  “Still, I’m embarrassed by the way I behaved. How can I ever look at your sisters again?”

  “Vicky was in no condition to cast stones. Besides, you were having fun. It happens to the best of us.”

  Not to her. Not in fifteen years. She’d learned her lesson by overindulging and never had more than a glass or two of wine.

  “Thanks for taking care of me and for not taking advantage of the situation.”

  “You’re welcome.” He stroked her hair and without realizing it, she snuggled closer to him. “The things you said last night. Were they true?”

  For the life of her she couldn’t remember.

  “My memory’s a little fuzzy. What things?”

  “About the men you dated after we were together.”

  Oh, damn her blabbering alcohol brain that caused her to speak her mind in addition to shed her inhibitions.

  “Do we have to talk about this?” she asked.

  “I’d like to know,” he whispered.

  She sighed, and her head pounded harder as she prepared to bare her soul to him. “When I moved to California, I was busy with my new job and getting the house situated for my dad. I didn’t have time for dating. Finding out I was pregnant stopped any chance. Years after Sean was born, an adjunct professor who worked with my dad asked me out. I felt obligated to go.”

  “And?” he asked when she was silent.

  “We dated a month before I slept with him. It was the first time since the pregnancy and you and…there wasn’t a connection. Here I had this handsome guy who was interested in me and all I could think about was…”

  Nick lifted her head off his chest to meet her eyes. “Was what?”

  She took a breath before pressing forward. “How he didn’t make me feel the way you made me feel.”

  “Should I be sorry?”

  She poked him in the ribs. “I dated a couple other times with similar results. It seems I attract studious types who understand the mechanics of sex but not the rest.”

  “You attracted me,” Nick said.

  “And I’ve never understood why. I’d pretty much convinced myself if it hadn’t been for the alcohol we’d never had been together.”

  “You’d have been wrong.”

  “Then why, Nick? Of all the women you could have had—and all the single women at the wedding wanted you—why me?”

  “I’ve always dated the popular girls. Playing sports in high school gave me access to those types of girls. I was young, horny, and it
was easy.”

  “I hated those girls. Not because they got all the guys but because they seemed fake.”

  “You were right. I used to hate when Franny would be a bitch to someone because she could. She was different when we were alone. It was an act to hide how insecure she was—and believe me when I tell you she was insecure. During the times we weren’t together, I dated different types of women.”

  He shifted to face her more. “I wanted someone I could talk to…someone who could see me as more than Nick the jock. I’d never found that until I met you.”

  Her eyes widened.

  “Don’t look surprised. You’ve met my family, so you see my childhood was full of love and laughter. I wanted someone who I could build a life like that with.”

  “Didn’t you get that with Franny?”

  Nick shook his head. “I got the kids and sense of family, but there was a lot of contention between Franny and my family. Maybe it was because they thought of her as the girl who trapped me into marriage. They tolerated her at best.”

  “Your marriage wasn’t happy?”

  “It was busy and fulfilling in some ways, but life with Franny was a challenge. Every. Single. Day. She resented that the pregnancy was making her fat and stopping her from going out to the clubs.”

  “That’s selfish.”

  “Franny is selfish.” He paused and stroked a hand down Ashley’s side causing her to shiver with need. “I didn’t make love to her again until our wedding night.”

  Her eyes snapped to his.

  “You didn’t?”

  “I couldn’t after you. I know we did things backward, but I had wanted to see if a relationship was possible. I still do.”

  Ashley bit her lip. “What if I don’t know whether I can have a relationship?”

  “Why would you say that?”

  “Because I’m not from a family like yours. When my mom left, my dad and I were broken. It took years for us to find our way to what would become normal for us.”

  “That doesn’t mean you aren’t worthy of having your own family.”

  “What if I can only be the way I was with you when I’m drunk? What if I can’t perform when I’m plain old me?”

  A devilish smile lit up his face. “Are you drunk now?”

  Slightly hungover, although not as bad as she thought she’d be, but not drunk. “No.”

  “Neither am I.” He rolled forward until she was pressed fully against his erection. “What do you say we do a little experiment?”

  Nick didn’t give her a chance to reply before he swept the T-shirt over her head. She wanted to blame the cool air against her bare breasts as the reason for the pebbling of her nipples and shiver that ran through her, but who was she fooling? Having Nick gaze at her as though she were a pagan goddess was both disconcerting and arousing.

  She’d never done the morning-after scene. The uncomfortable moment when you wanted to scurry away before you had to talk about what happened and the reason why it should—or should not—happen again.

  Nick leaned forward and pressed his lips to her temple. “Stop analyzing. You’re only allowed to use your five senses during this experiment.”

  She couldn’t help but smile. “Oh? What do you want me to do?”

  He pushed aside the covers and leaned over her. “Feel, Ashley. I want you to lie back and feel.” He circled a nipple before pinching the point between calloused fingers.

  She moaned.

  “And that. Lots of moaning.” He replaced his fingers with his mouth. “Tell me what you like and don’t like.”

  He pushed her breasts together and pressed his face into her cleavage. The scratchiness of his scruff made her shiver.

  “Cold?”

  She shook her head. She was on fire, a mounting volcano in the early stages before eruption. And based on the combined efforts of his hands and mouth, it wasn’t going to take her long to explode.

  His mouth alternated between sucking her nipples and laving them with soft and steady strokes of his tongue. Each time he tugged harder, moisture pooled between her legs. She thought she could come alone from him doing just that.

  When he switched to her other breast, his hands moved lower and along the waistband of her bikini panties.

  “So hot. Your body is burning up.” He stroked her through the silky material, and Ashley’s body jerked off the bed.

  “You won’t be needing these.” He slid them down her legs until she was bare before him. Her breath came in small pants. He’d brought her right to the edge with very little effort.

  “So beautiful.” He kissed her stomach, her hip, her thigh. Everywhere but where she wanted him to kiss her.

  “Nick,” she gasped, writhing against the mattress.

  “What, honey? Tell me what you want.”

  “Touch me. Kiss me. Down there.”

  He moved up to her mouth. “As you wish.” Then he continued the torturous journey down her body.

  He slid a finger past her damp curls to where she was moist and hot. “So hot, so tight.” He pressed a second finger inside, and she raised her butt off the mattress.

  She was shaking, desperate for release.

  Just as she was about to plead with him to finish the job, he stroked her swollen nub, and she cried out, coming in a delicious series of tremors throughout her body. She’d barely caught her breath when she felt his warm breath between her legs.

  “Let’s see how quickly you can do that again.”

  His tongue replaced his fingers, and he sipped from her. “So sweet.”

  She was already vibrating again, her head thrashing back and forth on the pillow. She bit her lower lip to prevent from calling out, but when he sucked her clit, she lost the battle and cried out his name.

  Her heart pounded, and she fought to catch her breath. Every part of her body was hypersensitive and aware of him beside her.

  “Wow. How did you do that?”

  “It’s easy when you are such a willing and cooperative subject.” He ran his hand along her stomach to cup her breasts. “You just need to know how to touch.” He pinched her nipple, sending another jolt to her center.

  “I’d say you definitely know how.”

  “You were halfway to coming before I even touched you.”

  She opened her eyes and gazed into his molten-chocolate depths. It hadn’t gone unnoticed he hadn’t pressed for his own release. The evidence of his arousal and the power of knowing she did that to him brought a smile to her lips.

  With her fingertip she circled a nipple, pleased when it puckered from her touch. His chest was beautiful, with a light sprinkling of dark hair. His shorts had ridden low and the tip of his cock protruded over the waistband. She brushed across it, pleased when he sucked in a harsh breath.

  That’s also when she realized he was shaking from exertion. He’d been loving and tender, making sure she found her own release—twice just this morning—yet hadn’t asked for anything in return.

  And now, after he’d given her more than she thought she had in her to give, it wasn’t enough. She wanted all of him.

  She slid her fingers under his waistband and began to lower them.

  He covered her hands with his own. “No reciprocation is necessary. This experiment was about you.”

  That he could be selfless while clearly fighting for control tugged at her heart.

  She pushed aside his hands. “The experiment isn’t over.” Then she lowered the waistband to reveal his shaft, thickening at her examination.

  He kicked off the shorts, and Nick naked and aroused was her sexiest fantasy come true. She stared, wanting to commit this vision to memory.

  A bead of liquid spilled out, and Ashley used her thumb to rub it over his swollen tip.

  He stopped her hands again. “As much as I love that, for me it’s one and done. And I’m right on the edge.”

  “Condom?” she asked.

  He paused only for a moment before he nodded at the end table closest to her. “In t
here.”

  She rolled away to open the drawer. With fumbling hands, she opened the new box—had he bought them with her in mind?—and removed a square packet.

  He took it from her and quickly sheathed himself. “Are you sure?”

  To answer him, she pushed him onto the pillows and straddled him. Reaching between her, she guided him to her entrance, bracing for a snug fit. It’d been so long for her, and Nick was larger than any of the men she’d ever been with.

  She went slow, and from the perspiration that lined his forehead, Nick wasn’t kidding about being on the edge.

  “It’s been a while for me, and you’re…are you sure you fit last time?”

  He laughed and flipped her beneath him. “I absolutely fit.” He kissed her, his tongue coaxing her to relax. “It’s been a while for me too, Ash.”

  She recalled him saying that last night, and his admission made her feel better. She relaxed and let him work his magic.

  He bent her right leg, spreading her further than before, all the while pushing until he was fully seated. “You okay?”

  Was she okay? He filled her so much, she thought she may explode. There was only one thing she needed.

  She thrust up. “Move, Nick. Now.”

  He growled and did exactly as she asked, ravishing her breasts all the while pumping into her hard and fast. The tremors of sensation pulsing through her were so intense she wanted to close her eyes, except she needed to see his face. She yanked on the back of his head and pulled his mouth to hers. Tongues tangled with feverish desperation.

  Despite her having already come twice, the orgasm was building again, the need so strong she wasn’t sure she’d ever recover from the reality of making love with Nick.

  “Faster,” she pleaded and moaned when he complied.

  Reaching between them, he stroked her and she shouted, tears streaming down her face as she came for what seemed an eternity. He grunted and followed her, his eyes never leaving hers as he made her feel everything she’d feared she’d never feel again.

  Chapter Nineteen

  The bell above the door to Decadent DeLites chimed as Nick opened it. Although he had eaten a full breakfast with Ashley hours earlier, Nick’s stomach growled at the sugary smell of cinnamon, spice, and more.