Christmas Cloches and Corpses

by Leeson, Gayle

  “Stop being so nervous,” he insisted. “Everyone will think you’re terrific.”

  I’d worn navy wide-leg pants and a checkered blazer à la Katherine Hepburn. I hadn’t wanted to show up overdressed, but I’d wanted Jason’s family—his parents, in particular—to know I was trying to make a good impression.

  I followed Jason into the kitchen where he placed the pudding into the refrigerator.

  A woman with shoulder-length silver hair came to kiss him on the cheek. “What have you got there?”

  “Banana pudding,” he said. “I can hardly wait to dig into it. Granny, this is Amanda.”

  Granny took my hand in both of hers. “It’s a pleasure to meet you. I’ve heard wonderful things about you.”

  “Thank you.” I smiled. “You have a gorgeous home.”

  “Aw, now, I can’t take credit for that,” she said, releasing my hand.

  “Yes, she can,” Jason said.

  “You’re right—I can.” She laughed. “Take care of her, Jason. The piranha is in a decent mood, but that could change at any second.”

  “The piranha?” I asked.

  “Jason’s mom,” she said quietly.

  “Ah, so you’re his paternal grandmother.”

  My observation made her snicker. “Nope, but I know my daughter, and she can be pretty prickly. But she’ll warm up to you eventually.”

  The piranha. That set my mind at ease.

  Jason led me through the dining room and the living room, introducing me to people whose names I tried to remember but knew I’d forget. At last, an elegant brunette with perfectly applied makeup turned blue eyes the same color as Jason’s on me. The piranha.

  “Mom, this is Amanda. Amanda, this is my mom, Peggy.”

  Peggy Piranha—it was even alliterative.

  Extending my hand, I said, “Peggy, nice to meet you.”

  She briefly shook my hand. “You, too.” Turning her attention to her son, she said, “Hi, sweetheart. You look thin. Are you eating enough?”

  “I’m eating plenty.” He took my hand. “Come on. I want you to meet my dad.”

  Jason’s dad had blond hair and brown eyes. I couldn’t see any resemblance between the two of them at all until the man smiled.

  Beaming, he reached out and shook my hand. “Hello, there! You must be Amanda. I’m Joshua Logan—call me Josh.”

  “Nice to meet you, Josh.”

  I’d barely uttered the words before Jason had to catch me when a child slammed against my legs.

  “Careful!” A woman tried unsuccessfully to catch the child. “I’m sorry,” she said to me as she passed. “Here, Cody—use your inhaler.”

  Inhalers, inhalers…does everybody use an inhaler these days?

  “Does Cody have asthma?” I asked Jason.

  “Yeah, why?” he asked.

  “I just wondered. I’ve encountered three people within the past twenty-four hours who have inhalers. It seems odd, that’s all.”

  Jason’s dad retrieved an inhaler from his pocket. “Make it four. I have asthma too.”

  “That’s the thing,” I said. “One of the women didn’t even have asthma.”

  Frowning, Josh said, “I don’t know why she’d use an inhaler then. Is she a drama queen who maybe wants people to feel sorry for her?”

  The words tumbled from my mouth as if they were emerging from my subconscious: “Or it could be she needs an excuse to get into the medicine closet.”

  “You think someone is using an inhaler to get into the medicine closet at the nursing home?” Jason asked. “Who?”

  “Sally Jane. She says she and the nurses put their purses in there to keep residents from getting something harmful.” I hated to do it, but I had to. “Jason, I have to leave.”

  “Of course. Let’s go.”

  “No,” I said. “You stay here and enjoy your party. I wouldn’t dream of taking you away from it. I can call—”

  “Nonsense. Why should you get to have all the fun of exposing a—” He looked around at the children playing nearby. “A bad guy?”

  “Your mom will hate me,” I said.

  “I’ll handle her,” Josh said. “I can tell this is something important. You two go.”

  “Thanks, Dad. I’ll call you later and fill you in.”

  On the drive to Winter Garden, I called Grandpa.

  “Is the potluck over already?” he asked.

  “Not exactly.” I explained to him that I had a revelation about Sally Jane. “She told me she volunteers on Saturday, so would you please go stay with Dwight until we get there?”

  “Sure. I’m on my way.”

  After speaking with Grandpa, I called Ryan. My call went to voice mail, so I left him a message setting forth my suspicions.

  I ended the call and put my phone back in my purse. I hoped Grandpa or Ryan could get to the nursing home before anything bad happened to Dwight.

  At the nursing home, Jason and I hurried inside to the nurses’ station. Penelope was manning the desk. Didn’t that woman ever get a day off?

  “I need to see Sally Jane,” I told her.

  “Sally Jane isn’t here today,” Penelope said. “She called in sick.”

  “Is she diabetic?”

  “No.” Penelope’s face was like a sheet of granite. She was obviously tired of me and my interference.

  I glanced down the hall and saw Ryan coming from the direction of Dwight’s room. I rushed to meet him.

  “How is he?” I asked.

  “Dwight is great. He and your grandpa are playing gin rummy,” Ryan said.

  Looking around to see if Penelope was listening—she was—I said, “I’m sorry for making you come here for nothing. Penelope said Sally Jane isn’t diabetic.”

  “That doesn’t mean she isn’t up to something shady in the medicine closet,” he said. “I’m having my friend, Roger, install a security camera in there first thing Monday.” He looked at Penelope, who’d come to linger a few feet away from us. “In the meantime, I want you to keep a log of everyone going in and out. I’m shocked you weren’t doing that all along.”

  Her lips tightened. “Forgive us for trusting our fellow employees.” She stormed off toward her desk.

  “One thing you learn in law enforcement,” Ryan told Jason and me. “Don’t trust anyone, especially around drugs or money.”

  Chapter Twenty-Nine

  O n Sunday, I was still feeling like an idiot. I’d ruined Jason’s party and gotten Grandpa, Ryan, and the nursing home staff in an uproar over nothing. I encouraged Jason to go back to the party, but he wouldn’t go. He insisted on staying with me. We wound up shopping for Sienna’s gift and a dessert tray for the Secret Santa reveal at Shops on Main.

  After feeding Jazzy and getting ready to face the day, I wrapped the presents to take to the Secret Santa party. I’d found a spy kit I thought would be perfect for Sienna. It had rearview glasses, a black light illuminator, a miniature microscope, a fingerprint kit, and a guide to Morse code. I wrapped her gift in paper emblazoned with female superheroes.

  I wrapped Ms. Oakes’ “home for the holidays” ornament in white paper adorned with silver snowflakes and topped it with an artificial white poinsettia.

  Kissing Jazzy on the top of her head, I explained that she couldn’t attend the party today because there would be too much chaos in the building. She didn’t seem to mind, and I thought she’d be happy having the house to herself for a while. And, yes, as a child, I did watch too many cartoons that gave human characteristics to animals.

  I put my packages into the car and drove to Shops on Main. I actually dreaded seeing Jason. By now, his mother would have told him how terrible I was, and he’d know it was true because I’d dragged him away from his grandparents’ party for no reason. If he’d told her what had happened, she’d be convinced I made it up in order to get out of there. I mean, sure, I was nervous, but I wouldn’t have come up with an excuse to duck out of the family party.

  Pulling into the Shop
s on Main lot, I saw several vehicles, but Jason’s wasn’t one of them. I was glad I got there ahead of him.

  I went inside hoping for a pep talk from Max, but she wasn’t there. I’d have thought she’d love being around the festivities, but then I thought she must’ve spent most of the night watching over Dwight again. I was sick of the way this entire week had gone. Maggie was angry with me and might never let me see Zoe again. I’d falsely accused Sally Jane of tampering with medicines at the nursing home. And I’d ruined my chances of making a good impression on Jason’s parents. What else could go wrong?

  Connie greeted me in the foyer with a warm hug. “Hi, there! Don’t you look beautiful?”

  “Oh, Connie, I messed up so badly yesterday.” I told her everything that had happened.

  “Now, I’m sure everything will be fine. Everyone makes mistakes, and no one makes a good impression on their boyfriend’s parents at their first meeting.”

  I looked into Connie’s lovely, kind face. “Really? You didn’t immediately win over Will’s parents?” I found that hard to believe.

  “No. They found me too bohemian—thought I was a hippie.”

  Okay, that I could believe. “But they quickly came to adore you.”

  “I don’t think they truly accepted me until I had Marielle,” she said. “I guess they decided then that I couldn’t be all bad.”

  “You’re wonderful,” I said.

  “I know that, and you know that, but it took them a while.” She smiled. “And Jason’s family will come to love you too. Are those his parents?”

  I froze and felt my eyes nearly bug out of my head. “What?”

  “He’s walking in with a couple who could be his parents.”

  I closed my eyes.

  “Open your eyes, straighten your back, plaster on your brightest smile, and turn around,” she instructed.

  “Do I have to?” I asked.

  “Yes.” She took me by the shoulders and turned me around.

  Yep. There was Jason, Peggy, and Josh coming through the door. I faked a toothpaste commercial smile that would’ve made any beauty queen proud.

  “Hello!” I managed to convince my legs to uproot from the spot where I was standing and move forward. “Jason, how wonderful that you’ve brought your parents.” I introduced the Logans to Connie.

  While the three of them were exchanging pleasantries, Jason sidled over to me and said, “Surprise.”

  “It sure is.” The smile was beginning to make my face hurt, but I didn’t dare let my real feelings show—you know, panic, fear, resentment toward Jason for not letting me know his parents would be coming.

  “After yesterday’s fiasco, I wanted my parents to—”

  “To see me in a better light?” I interrupted.

  “I wouldn’t have put it like that, but…yeah.”

  Josh came over to us. “Amanda, that banana pudding was some of the best I’d ever tasted. I hope you’ll share the recipe with Peggy.”

  “Yeah, no problem. I’ll send it by Jason.”

  “And we’ll send your bowl back.” Josh grinned. “I took the leftovers home with us and made myself sick finishing them off.”

  “I’m glad you enjoyed it.” I saw that Peggy was still conversing with Connie while glaring at me. If Connie couldn’t soften the woman toward me, no one could.

  Ford and Sienna arrived, and she launched herself at my waist.

  “Uncle Ford said you had a present for me!”

  “I do.” Glad for something to do other than endure the awkward situation with Jason and his parents, I went to the tree where I’d put her gift.

  She took it from me. “May I open it now?”

  “Let’s wait until everyone else gets here,” Ford said.

  Peggy Logan still hadn’t said anything to me by the time Frank, Ella, and Ms. Oakes arrived. I decided to take the initiative to speak with her first.

  “Ms. Logan, that’s a lovely sweater,” I said. “I apologize again for having to leave your mother’s party yesterday.”

  “Thank you.” Her face remained stony.

  I tried again. “There are some yummy desserts in the kitchen.”

  “Are desserts all you make?” she asked.

  I didn’t correct her assumption that I’d made the desserts. “No, but I’m not terribly handy in the kitchen. Would you like to see some of my fashions?”

  “Maybe later—after the party.”

  Ms. Oakes instructed us to join her in the kitchen where there were a variety of crudites, charcuterie, and cheeses in addition to the desserts I’d brought. Everyone couldn’t fit into the kitchen at once, and we spilled out into the hallway.

  “Thank you all for coming to this little celebration of Christmas and our success here at Shops on Main,” Ms. Oakes said, lifting a cup of punch. “I wish you all many blessings over the holiday season and the year to come.”

  We all echoed Ms. Oakes’ sentiment in our own way, and then we filled our plates. Frank realized there wasn’t any Christmas music playing, and he hurried to turn it on. I knew I should try to schmooze with Jason’s parents some more, but I took my plate and wandered into the lobby where Sienna was looking at the tree.

  Smiling, I sat on a bench. “Aren’t you eating?”

  “Nah, I’m not really hungry,” she said.

  “You’re too curious to know what you’ll find in that package,” I said.

  She grinned. “I’ll get something in a few minutes.”

  I got up, sat down my plate, and retrieved the gift. “Open it.”

  Eyes widening, she asked, “Are you sure?”

  “I’m sure.”

  Sienna carefully unwrapped her present, and we were both delighted when she saw what it was.

  “Amanda, this is awesome!” She sat it down long enough to give me a hug. “I love it!” Grabbing up the spy kit, she hurried down the hall. “Uncle Ford, look!”

  Jason came and put his arm around me. “I knew she’d love it.”

  I laughed. “I’m glad she did. I’d kinda love to play with it with her.”

  “Don’t you mean detect?” he asked.

  “Oh, yeah, of course.”

  Ms. Oakes came into the foyer. “It appears Ms. Tucker feels the party isn’t moving along fast enough.”

  Great. I feel bad enough about ruining Jason’s party yesterday. Now Ms. Oakes is calling me out like I’m an unruly schoolgirl. Way to paint me in a good light, Ms. O!

  “Sienna wasn’t eating, and I wanted her to have her gift,” I said, feeling lamer by the minute.

  “Well, we might as well open the rest then,” Ms. Oakes said. She went to the tree and began handing out the presents.

  I received a set of watercolor pencils from Frank, and I went over to thank him. “I love these.”

  “You’re ever so welcome. I’m glad you like them,” he said. “Our spy said your coloring pencils were getting a little short.” He looked around. “Where’d she go anyway?”

  Looking around, I didn’t see Sienna. “Let me check in the kitchen.”

  I went into the kitchen to see Sienna standing against the counter. She had her hands clenched at her sides and her eyes were wide and frightened.

  “Sienna, what’s wrong?”

  Almost before I could finish the question, Sally Jane stepped into the doorway. She was holding a small revolver. “I thought you were a good person, but you’re like everybody else. You don’t care that insulin my mother needs is being wasted on dying people—or, worse, discarded.”

  “Surely, there’s some sort of agency that—”

  “Shut up,” Sally Jane said. “You and I are going on a little trip.”

  “I don’t think so,” I said.

  “Cause a fuss, and I’ll shoot everybody in this place—or at least six of them—and I’ll start with the girl.” She waved the gun toward the hallway. “Now, move.”

  “How do you think you can get away with this?” I asked. “All those people are going to see us.”
/>
  “No, they’re not. The girl is going to distract them.” She turned to Sienna. “Go over there and distract those people somehow, or I’m going to shoot Amanda.”

  “What should I do?” Sienna wailed.

  “I don’t know—turn the tree over or something.”

  Sienna went to the foyer. “H-hey, look at me! I’m going to…to turn over the tree…or something!”

  “You’re gonna what?” Ford asked.

  There was the cacophony of voices speaking at once, and Sienna was sobbing.

  “Get ready to move,” Sally Jane said, her voice barely above a hiss.

  I stared down at the gun and saw a sliver of red on the barrel. When she’d painted it, she’d missed a spot. Fake inhaler. Fake gun. I raised my left elbow and brought it up into Sally Jane’s face. I connected and whirled to face her.

  Sally Jane screamed as she crumpled to the floor with her face in her hands.

  I heard Connie exclaim, “Yes, there is a strange lady in the kitchen! Go see who it is, Trish!”

  By the time Ms. Oakes got to us, I had restrained Sally Jane with trash bag ties. Blood from her nose was dripping onto the linoleum floor.

  “Could you please call 9-1-1?” I asked.

  Ms. Oakes nodded but still stood gaping at me.

  “If you don’t have your phone handy, mine is in my pocket,” I said. “I’m afraid to let go of her wrists because I don’t know how long these trash bag zip ties will hold.”

  She nodded again. “I-I’ll get my phone.”

  Spinning around, Ms. Oakes almost collided with a young woman who I could only guess was Krista—because why not? It wasn’t bad enough that Jason’s parents would now be convinced I was a walking nightmare, I was going to make an indelible impression on the building manager’s daughter as well.

  “Dang, blame it!” Max exclaimed from behind my right shoulder. “What in the world did I miss?”

  Epilogue

  Maggie dropped Dwight and Zoe off at my house on Christmas Eve. After Sally Jane confessed to putting allergy medication in Dwight’s cake, Maggie had apologized for accusing me of doping him, but she apparently felt too awkward around Grandpa and me to stay for our party. I wasn’t convinced she wasn’t still holding a grudge.