When the Heart Falls

by Kimberly Lewis

  As he was getting into his truck, all thoughts of Andy shot from his mind when he heard a panicked bellow from somewhere to his left. He scanned the area, narrowing his eyes. He heard it again and his pulse dipped then raced. Finally, he spotted the feeder-calf, flailing on its side in the blowout at the top of the catstep.

  Chapter 2

  Andy’s heart rate hadn’t quite returned to normal yet, but at least she wasn’t glancing in the rearview mirror every five seconds anymore. It was clear she had made a clean escape.

  She traveled the familiar road to her grandparents' ranch, wondering what had gone wrong. She started this weekend out on a high in her most favorite place in the world: Tyler, Nebraska. Photographing of her cousin’s wedding was a welcome break from the misery of taking pictures of nameless families and their milestone events.

  Her mind filtered back to yesterday afternoon. She had been so excited to see her grandparents, to breathe the fresh air and simply stare at the Sandhills bursting in summer glory. It warmed her heart to see the ocean of rippling grass, the splash of vibrant pinks, yellows, blues and whites in the wildflowers scattered across the hills and the sparkle of fresh water bubbling up from the ground, pooling into ponds like a million tiny diamonds on the prairie.

  She had parked outside the church, its towering steeple casting a shadow over her car. Giggling at the cowboy perched on his horse in the parking lot; she had to force the urge to curtsey from her legs when he tipped his hat to her. She gathered her gear from the trunk and slammed it closed with her elbow.

  She was home. She loved that she could actually hear the cattle calling in the distance, the rustle of wind through the cottonwoods, even the blinking of the lone yellow traffic light rhythmically ticking. Stepping into the vestibule had made her want to reach for her Sunday bonnet.

  Alone in the peace of the country church quaintly decorated with wildflowers and ribbon, Andy felt the presence of tradition. She heard the voices of past generations echoing in this cherished place. She sat in the last pew, relishing the serenity before she set up her equipment.

  The wedding party, including her parents, filtered in throughout the next thirty minutes. The conversation with her parents had been typical. Her mother criticized her chosen outfit of black skirt, which was too short, sleeveless white top, which was too revealing, and lead foot in an impractical strappy sandal since Andy had arrived an hour before them.

  She could only picture the nightmare four-and-a-half-hour drive had she decided to travel with her parents. She would’ve pitched herself from the car before they made it fifty miles.

  Her father, on the other hand, had hugged her, kissed her cheek and told her she was beautiful. She could always count on him to diffuse the charged atmosphere. Then he escorted her mother to the waiting room with the rest of the family, allowing Andy to get to work.

  Andy placed the last of the lighting. “Okay. I’m going to need the wedding party to line up in front of the altar.” She watched through the lens of her camera.

  And that’s when her fate shifted.

  Bam. A shiver shot down her spine when she met those intense hazel eyes through her lens.

  Her finger froze and so did her heart. She lost all awareness of where she was or what she was doing. Just like that. Lightning. Her eyes locked with the best man’s eyes and she was sunk. She was confused, numb, and breathless.

  Her racing heart and sweaty palms pulled her back to the present. Her memory was so vivid, tears burned in her eyes. She ran a shaky hand through her hair, loosening her ponytail and leaned her elbow against the window. Why did he have to be so damn hot? She wanted to scream and turn the car around. She wanted to go back to him, wanted it so much her heart threatened to burst.

  Her stomach turned with shame, because she had wanted him. The moment she saw him she wanted him. She couldn’t tear her eyes off him. And she knew he felt the same way. It was written across that rugged face.

  She remembered taking the shots before the ceremony; her fingers felt stiff, her palms sweaty and a sigh of disgust escaped her lips at her lack of professionalism.

  Then, during the ceremony, their eyes met and sparks flew. It was all but fireworks in that church and it wasn't the bride and groom. Somehow she had made it through the ceremony and captured all of the pictures she wanted to get.

  Her body warmed with the memory of his deep voice whispering in her ear at the reception. Well, as much of a whisper as it could be over the loud reception music. And she smiled as her mind replayed the events of last night.

  “Do you always make it a habit to gaze intently at the best man?”

  Her breath caught in her chest and the tingles were still coursing down her body as he came around in front of her, standing almost toe to toe. Her brain ceased to work.

  Normally she would have cut a man down to size for starting out with such an arrogant line; she tried not to encourage the egotistical type. But the truth of his statement had her squirming.

  He had removed his jacket and tie and rolled the sleeves of his white shirt, showing tanned, muscular forearms. The two buttons at his collar were undone, revealing smooth bronze skin. She finally raised her eyes to his and saw them glowing with humor. Her cheeks burned. He knew she had checked him out and liked what she saw.

  “I was not gazing intently at you.” Andy didn’t know how she had gathered the strength to push her words past the lump in her throat.

  He raised doubting dark brows. “Mmm.”

  “I wasn’t.” She set her jaw and narrowed her eyes. “I’m a photographer and I have to capture people’s most important moments. I look at everyone intently.” He grinned at the challenging glare she sent him.

  Her breath caught with the graze of his skin against hers as he took her drink from her hand and set it on the closest table and replaced it with his own hand. He started toward the dance floor, pulling her behind him.

  “What are you doing?” Her nervous plea annoyed her. But they were already among the other dancers and he had turned around to face her.

  He placed his hand at her waist and brought her into close contact with his body. Too close. But she didn’t pull back. Whether it was because she was still in shock from the commanding way he was treating her or because every part of her body was magnetized to his, she didn't know.

  “I’m dancing with you, Andy.” He took the first steps, leading her into a Texas two-step. Another jolt of shock paralyzed her for a second. But his smooth steps and the tug of his hand snapped her into movement. She had to stutter step to catch up to him.

  “Who’d you ask for my name?” she asked after her senses made a small recovery. The use of Andy instead of Andrea told her it must’ve been a close relative of hers with the exception of her mother.

  He grinned at her and continued moving them expertly around the floor without looking where he was going; his comfort spoke of all the women he must have practiced with. Andy shook off that thought.

  “No one. I know who you are.”

  The smug look on his handsome face pricked her temper. She didn’t like being toyed with, but when she opened her mouth to give him a rude awakening she caught the playful glimmer in his eye.

  “Who are you?”

  Another smile lit his features but before she could ask more he spun her out and back in, tucking her neatly into the curve of his chest so she was facing out with his arms wrapped around her stomach.

  “I can’t believe you don’t recognize me.” His deep voice tickling her ear again sent a shiver down her spine, turning her insides to warm honey. “I could almost be hurt by that.”

  Andy smiled in spite of his arrogance. “Give me a hint.” Her voice wavered and just as she took a deep breath he spun her to face him without missing a step.

  God, he was a great dancer. She had to bite her lip to keep it from trembling.

  Their faces were centimeters from each other. Andy actually flickered her glance to his lips, felt his breath against her own. She tensed
for his kiss, wanted it and knew she shouldn’t, but it didn’t come. He pulled back, and Andy honestly felt disappointed.

  She dragged her eyes from his firm lips surrounded by a dusting of dark hair to his teasing, intense hazel eyes staring into hers. His strong hands pull her closer, his legs bumping hers as he led her in circles around the dance floor. She was completely unaware of anyone else’s presence.

  Then he quirked a brow, pretending to think over the question she had forgotten.

  “Let’s see.” He squinted up and scrunched up his mouth. “The last time you saw me I was sixteen. Scrawny, with curls on top of my head.”

  Andy had barely recovered from their encounter to smile at his description. She tried envisioning this extremely good-looking, well-groomed man as the boy he was depicting.

  “It was Thanksgiving weekend,” he continued in his light-hearted tone, “and I had just come inside the house after I wrecked my dirt bike on an embarrassingly easy jump.”

  Before he had finished, realization dawned on Andy and she dropped her head to his shoulder, shaking it back and forth. She felt his hand tighten on hers.

  “Oh my God.” She raised her head to look at him with new eyes. “Jason McCoy.” Andy knew she was glowing, but she couldn’t help it, she was genuinely glad to see him.

  Jason smiled back at her and it made her hands tremble. The feeling of joy was replaced by disappointment and embarrassment. The man she had been mentally undressing, the one with the magnetic eyes, deep voice and muscular frame was a kid. The man swirling her senses as he twirled her around the dance floor, making her feel things she didn’t know she was capable of feeling, the man she wanted desperately to kiss was her ex-boyfriend's younger brother, which made him younger than she was. Which made him off-limits.

  Andy sunk lower in the driver's seat with her hand pressed to her forehead, drowning in mortification with the memory of what she had allowed to happen.

  Bile was rising in her throat with the cadence her conscience was drumming in her as she drove along the dirt road. He’s Josh’s brother, how could you?

  How could she have slept with her ex-boyfriend's brother? Jason was not an option for her. But she hadn’t recognized him at first. She didn’t know the best man she was tingling from head to toe over was Jason McCoy. She just knew he had her in a tailspin and made her heart thump through her shirt.

  Remembering how Josh McCoy had treated her when they were together, the awful things he said and did, the cheating, the lying, should have made her run when she discovered Jason’s identity.

  Nine years ago she would’ve turned herself inside out to please Josh. He was her childhood love, her college love. Andy shook her head. She had been so stupid to love a man incapable of human compassion. A selfish son of bitch who loved no one but himself.

  Andy pulled her car to a stop in front of the white picket fence surrounding her grandparents’ house. This was the first easy breath she had drawn since flying from the hotel fifteen minutes ago and the incessant pounding in her head had dulled to a rumble. Sliding her sunglasses down her nose, she leaned over to check her reflection in the rear view mirror.

  “Nice, Andy.” She rolled her eyes, then retrieved the brush from her purse, removed the haphazard pony tail and tried to tame some of the tangles from her long hair. After a few strokes she gave up the effort and snagged her baseball cap from the glove compartment. She licked her fingers and ran them under her eyes, attempting to wipe away the smudged mascara.

  She abandoned that unattainable task too. She would have to sneak into the bathroom to get cleaned up as quietly as possible. The last thing she needed was to draw extra attention to her early arrival.

  She opened the gate and walked up the brick path to the screen door. As soon as she was within reach, the heavenly scents of Grandma’s breakfast cooking filtered into the air.

  With a smile she entered the kitchen and was greeted by the sight of her grandmother wrapped in a floral apron, pouring batter onto the steaming waffle maker. Belgian waffles. Her favorite.

  The door slammed behind her. Without looking in her direction, Betty spoke.

  “Good, Andy. You’re here earlier than I expected.” Her voice spoke plainly but Andy heard the underlying meaning in her greeting.

  Choosing to ignore the unspoken question she grabbed a piece of crispy bacon from the plate and nibbled on it.

  “I thought I’d get an early start for home. I need to see how Megan’s doing.” She leaned against the deep ceramic sink. Careful not to let her grandma see her appearance, she kept her head bent and her attention on the bacon.

  “I’m sure your sister is faring just fine. She probably sweet-talked some gentleman into doing her fetching.”

  Andy laughed. She was probably right. Megan could get a guy to do just about anything for her. Oh Megan. Andy could cry. Why had she picked this weekend to sprain her ankle playing sand volleyball? Andy really could’ve used her sister’s help. Megan would’ve kept her from doing something stupid.

  Betty continued to prepare the bounty of food for her family with the same effortlessness she always displayed. The efficiency was inevitable when you spent your life cooking and caring for a family and various ranch hands.

  Andy shoved the rest of the bacon in her mouth and excused herself from the kitchen. She felt dirty and disheveled. Her body screamed for a shower, but that was out of the question. She slid along the wall, practically leaping past the doorway into the living room to avoid being seen by her parents.

  She escaped into the bathroom as the effects of a hangover and the weight of the events after the wedding reception sunk deeper into her mind.

  Andy freshened up as best she could then inspected herself in the mirror.

  Not bad, she thought, noting the smudges under her eyes, the general puffiness around her face and the complete lack of color. I could pass for a hospital patient recovering from food poisoning.

  With her hands gripping the sink and a determined stare, she tried to give herself a badly needed pep talk. That lasted all of ten seconds. She bowed her head, her eyes stinging with tears. She had felt so good last night, been happier than she could remember feeling. And now in the harsh fluorescent bathroom lighting, she felt the misery of loneliness and doom.

  Chapter 3

  Collapsed on the edge of the bathtub, Andy could still hear the music reverberating in her ears. She could still feel herself smiling when she realized she had been dancing with an old friend of sorts.

  “It’s no wonder I didn’t recognize you,” she said with a warm smile. “You were swearing and covered in dirt and blood with an enormous bruise forming on your forehead.” The memory swept vividly over her on the dance floor.

  His jeans were torn and he had uttered every profanity in the book before realizing she was there and then had blushed red from his hair to his toes. Sputtering apologies, he retreated down the hall to the bathroom as fast as his injured leg allowed him.

  “And now look at you, you’re…” She paused to give him another look over. “All grown up.” Those were the first words that had come to mind.

  “Yep. That’s me, a full grown-man now.”

  Her remark had obviously struck a nerve with the tone he just gave her. But she only remembered him as a kid. He was what? Four years younger than she was at least? With those sparkling eyes focused on her she couldn’t really remember, or think straight, or care.

  She knew in the back of her mind the songs had switched at least once, maybe twice, but he had expertly kept her moving so she hadn’t thought to stop.

  “You’ve grown into a very handsome man.” The words slipped out before she had a chance to check them and her cheeks instantly burned. She diverted her eyes to his shoulder, but he tilted his head to pull her gaze back to him.

  His white teeth gleamed through the completely adorable lop-sided grin. “Thank you.”

  It was almost a whisper. Andy swallowed hard, her limbs numbed and streams of heat seeped t
hrough her veins. His eyes dipped to her mouth, her breath caught and trembled in her throat. Anticipation built and throbbed in her core. His head leaned in a fraction as she focused on his open lips, but he backed off for the second time.

  “Well, with being from the same gene pool as Josh, I had a fighting chance anyway.”

  The moment shattered, Andy stiffened with the mention of Josh, and she hardened inside.

  “So how about we go over to that table to get you off those killer heels and proceed to get embarrassingly drunk?”