4 Waxing & Waning

by Amanda M. Lee

  “You have a list? You think so much of yourself it’s sickening,” he said.

  “And you all are at the top of my list,” I said. “Now go.”

  “You can’t win this,” Paul said. “We’re stronger than you.”

  I didn’t bother to swallow my laugh. “If that’s true, then why does Blake want me so badly?”

  Paul’s face contorted.

  “Think about that, skid mark,” I said. “And don’t come back here.”

  When I got back inside the house, Tally was gone and only Kelsey and Paris remained.

  Kelsey answered my unasked question. “She’s upstairs pouting.”

  “Good. Let’s get the bonfire going.”

  We carried everything into the small yard, positioning Kelsey at the fence gate to keep a lookout. Once the fire was going, we used sticks from one of the trees to push things around, making sure everything was roasted. Once we were satisfied, we gathered together to watch the last of it burn.

  “I’ve been thinking,” Paris said. “I think we should destroy the amulet.”

  “I was thinking about that, too,” I admitted. “We’re not sure what it does, but since only evil people seem to want it, I’d be happy ensuring that none of them get it.”

  “It’s probably the safest thing,” Kelsey agreed. “It might be powerful, and in the right hands it could do some good.”

  “We don’t know who could do good with it,” I said. “Let’s get rid of it. Can you do it, Paris?”

  “Yeah,” she said. “I’ve been corresponding with my mom. She’s sending a box of supplies for us. It should arrive tomorrow. It will still take me two weeks to get everything ready.”

  “At least it’s a plan.”

  We stayed outside until the fire died, poking through the ash and making sure there was nothing there to betray us to Blake’s cadets should they try to search through the remnants.

  “Is it wrong that I’m looking forward to taking them down?” Kelsey asked.

  “If it is, then we’re all wrong together.”

  Thirty-Two

  I didn’t see Rafael for two days. When he did return, he looked tired. Since vampires didn’t sleep – at least as far as I knew, at least – that was telling.

  “You look horrible.”

  “Thanks,” Rafael said dryly, settling on the couch next to me.

  “When was the last time you … do you sleep?”

  “I rest.”

  “When was the last time you rested?”

  “When did you come here again?” He forced his tone to be light, but the amusement didn’t make it all the way up his face and to his eyes. “Where is everyone?”

  “I’m the only one here.”

  “Will they be back?”

  I shrugged. “I’m not expecting Kelsey or Paris. They’re with Seth and Kevin. I have no idea about the dimwitted duo.”

  Rafael pursed his lips. “I don’t think you should stay here alone. Not now. Not with everything that’s going on.”

  “Why not? It’s not like anyone can come in.”

  Rafael made an exasperated sound in the back of his throat. “I see you’re back to form.”

  “You say that like it’s a bad thing,” I teased. I sobered when my eyes took in his drawn countenance. “What happened?”

  “I’ve been meeting with a variety of … let’s just say interested parties,” Rafael said. “The Academy has been on the move.”

  “What are they doing?”

  “They’re wiping out every nest they can find.”

  “I thought you didn’t like nests?”

  “The nests here aren’t true nests,” he said. “They’re more like nestlets.”

  “What’s a nestlet?”

  “Just a small nest,” Rafael said.

  “Why didn’t you just say that?”

  “Why are you always so difficult?”

  “I think it’s just the way I was born,” I said. “Tell me about the nestlets.”

  “At least twelve of them have been wiped out in the past six months,” Rafael said, leaning his head back against the couch. “They’re just gone.”

  “I hate to seem ignorant, but you’re kind of used to it, so I might as well just go for it,” I said. “How many vampires are on this campus?”

  “The campus? Not that many,” Rafael said. “The area is a different story.”

  “Meaning?”

  “Most vampires don’t want to hang out on a college campus unless they’re hunting,” he said. “The vampires stay off of the campus if they can help it, picking different locations to feed. College girls are easy to … bend.”

  “That’s so demeaning and gross,” I said.

  “Would you prefer we pick harder game and kill them?”

  “People aren’t game,” I said. “They’re people. You may not like them, but college girls are still people.”

  “Barely,” Rafael grumbled.

  “If it’s any consolation, I don’t think that they’re killing them,” I said.

  Rafael raised his head, his eyes questioning. “What do you mean?”

  “Why would they need two teams to kill the same set of vampires?”

  “I don’t know.”

  “I think they’re collecting them for some reason,” I said.

  “What reason?”

  “Well, I’ve been giving it some thought,” I said.

  “That’s frightening.”

  I ignored him. “Can the resurrection stone be used to control vampires?”

  “Yes.”

  “Wouldn’t it make sense that Blake wants the stone for that exact reason?”

  “Yes.”

  “You’ve already figured all of this out, haven’t you?”

  “Yes.”

  “I’m just a talking monkey to you sometimes, aren’t I?”

  “I don’t like monkeys.”

  I rolled my eyes. “Why haven’t you told me?”

  “Why do you think I’m here now?” Rafael asked. “It’s certainly not for the company.”

  “What crawled up your butt and died?”

  “This place,” Rafael hissed. “I hate this place.”

  “Then why are you here?”

  “I had unfinished business when I came here,” Rafael said. “I was hunting the witches who killed my family.”

  “Tara’s family,” I said, thinking back to the night at the Alpha Chi house when Tara had tried to burn Rafael at the stake. “She’s gone. Why did you stay?”

  “I thought she was gone long before that night,” he said.

  “And yet you stayed,” I pressed.

  “I had no place else to go,” Rafael admitted. “Everyone I know is gone. Everyone in my family is gone. They’ve been gone for more than a century. It’s just me.”

  My heart went out to him. “You could try to find a new family.”

  “I think that’s simpler for someone like you, someone who makes friends so easily,” he said. “I’m not like you.”

  “I don’t make friends easily,” I scoffed. “People hate me.”

  Rafael snorted. “You do make enemies easily, too,” he conceded. “You also inspire loyalty. Look at Paris and Kelsey. You keep putting them in danger, and they stay. It’s not because they have a higher purpose, it’s because they’re drawn to you.”

  I didn’t know what to say, so I remained silent.

  “You have a way of drawing people in, and I’m one of those you cast under your spell,” he said. “You’re frustrating, and annoying, and so sarcastic I want to rip your tongue out at times. Yet, I’m still drawn to you.”

  I was starting to feel uncomfortable, an emotion Rafael must have picked up on. “I know you will never feel that way about me. I’ve known for a very long time. I don’t know why I persisted in pursuing you, but I know that you want the wolf.”

  “Rafael,” I protested. “I’m such a mess that I don’t know what I want.”

  “That’s not true,” he said. “You’ve
always been drawn to him. And, while you like me and find a certain joy in torturing me, you only see me as a friend. I’m actually fine with it.”

  “You are?”

  “I’ve watched some of your shows,” he said. “The ones with vampires and humans, and they make me laugh. I mean, when you really think about it, what does a centuries-old vampire have in common with a girl who has lived twenty years and who is still finding herself?”

  “You’re saying we have nothing in common,” I said.

  “We have common goals,” Rafael corrected. “Other than that, though, you’re right. We have absolutely nothing in common.

  “I don’t care what boys Kelsey and Paris are canoodling with this week,” he continued. “I certainly don’t care what jeans and jackets are in, or what celebrity is currently in jail. I find no joy in the mundane things a person your age finds happiness in.

  “It’s not a fault of yours,” he said. “It’s not a fault of mine. It just is what it is. I find you entertaining at times. I also find I want to beat my head into the wall when you won’t shut up. I will always try to protect you, but I will never be able to give you what you need – and you are incapable of giving me what I need.”

  I sighed heavily. “I don’t … .”

  “You’re not going to hurt my feelings if you admit you love the wolf,” he said. “I’ve known that for quite some time. He knows it, too.”

  “He lied to me. He betrayed me.”

  “Did he? Because, from where I’m standing, he’s done nothing but try and protect you since the first moment he saw you,” Rafael said. “Yes, he knew about Laura and didn’t tell you. Did you ever consider that he did that because he was trying to save you from what happened?”

  “No,” I said honestly. “I think he did that because he had to follow his stupid pack’s rules.”

  “I can’t pretend to understand how a pack works,” Rafael said. “I can tell you that Aric has been going against his pack, at least where you’re concerned, since the beginning. He takes them on for you. He argues with them for you. He battles them for you. He fights for you, even if you don’t see it.”

  “I still don’t know if I can accept the pack,” I said. “If it was just him, it might be a different story.”

  “That’s something I can’t help you with,” he said. “You two will work that out on your own – and I have no doubt that you will work it out. It’s inevitable now. I do know that Aric has put himself in grave danger this year so he can protect you.”

  “You’re calling him Aric now? What happened to calling him the wolf?”

  “I’m tired,” he said. “I’m not thinking straight.”

  “I don’t want to ever hurt you,” I said. “You’ve been really good to me. And, yeah, I like to irritate you because, well, it’s just fun. It’s like when my dad’s friends come over to the house for poker and I purposely irritate them.”

  “You see me as you do your father? That’s … odd.”

  “I didn’t mean anything by it,” I said. “You’re just so … serious.”

  “I wasn’t always serious,” he said. “I just think my idea of fun and your idea of fun are vastly different things.”

  “I guess.”

  “The good thing for you is that the wolf seems to have the same idea of fun as you do,” Rafael said. “You should embrace that and run with it. It’s not easy to find. When this is all over with – and I think that will be happening soon – the two of you can start over.”

  “What will you do?”

  Rafael shrugged. “We shall see.” He got to his feet. “I’ll stay in the yard tonight. I don’t want you staying here alone.”

  “Why don’t you sleep on the couch?”

  “What if one of your roommates sees me? Are you up for explaining that?”

  “I don’t care,” I said. “As long as you’re not watching me sleep, everything will be good.”

  Rafael rubbed his forehead tiredly. “I would be lying if I didn’t admit that resting inside didn’t hold some appeal.”

  I slapped my knees with both hands. “Well, it’s settled. I’ll get you a blanket.”

  “I don’t need one.”

  “You don’t feel cold, I know,” I said. “That doesn’t mean you can’t look normal and cuddle with a blanket while sleeping on the couch.”

  “Fine.”

  “We could watch a movie together,” I suggested. “It’s still early. Friends watch movies together all of the time.”

  “What movie?”

  I thought about messing with him, suggesting something I knew he would hate, but he looked so worn down I couldn’t bring myself to do it. I reached over and picked up the remote control, handing it to him. “Your choice.”

  “Is this a trick?”

  “Nope.” I moved toward my bedroom to get the blanket. “Rafael?”

  “Yes.”

  “Thank you for … everything.”

  “Don’t thank me yet,” he said. “Thank me when we’ve finished this. When it’s all over, when everything is settled, then we can talk about thanks. Your wolf is going to owe me a big favor as it is.”

  “I knew you two were working together,” I griped.

  “Yes, you are truly a bastion of intelligence and virtue.”

  “And you say I’m the sarcastic one.”

  Rafael arched an eyebrow. “Maybe you’re rubbing off on me.”

  Thirty-Three

  “So, tell me again, who thought it was a good idea to have a party at a house where no one can enter?”

  April was starting to draw to a close and, while the nights weren’t warm, the huge bonfire Tally and Kristy had lit in on the back lawn took the edge off the night. Kelsey, Paris and I were standing on the back porch watching about fifty people mill about on our tiny lawn.

  “Tally insisted,” Paris said. “She said she wanted to have another party before the school year ends. We only have a few weeks left.”

  “Where are they going to go to the bathroom?”

  “The neighbors are having a party, too,” Kelsey said. “I guess they’ll go over there.”

  “This has disaster written all over it,” I said.

  “Doesn’t everything we do have disaster written all over it?”

  “Pretty much.”

  “Why should this be any different?”

  I shrugged. “Just keep your eyes peeled for any of the guys from the Academy,” I said. “They’ll try to break in if they can.”

  “That won’t be a problem in another few days,” Paris said. “We’re almost ready on that front.”

  “Good. I’ll be glad when it’s over.”

  “Do you think destroying it will end things?” Kelsey asked, her eyes hopeful.

  “Probably not,” I said. “It’s not going to be a Covenant College spring without a big showdown. I just hope, when this one happens, that we’re the ones with the upper hand for a change.”

  “That would be something different,” Kelsey said.

  “Speaking of different, how is Kevin?”

  “He should be here in a few minutes,” she said, smiling. “We’re going to cuddle by the fire.”

  “I wouldn’t use the word cuddle,” I said. “Guys don’t like to cuddle.”

  “They cuddle,” Kelsey protested.

  “Yeah, but you can’t call it cuddling,” Paris agreed. “That makes it seem less manly to them.”

  “Men are so stupid,” Kelsey said. “They should just agree with whatever we say and be done with it.”

  I snorted. “That only happens in romance novels.”

  “Yeah, well, I’m going to start a new trend,” she said. “In my new world order, men are going to look at their women with nothing but adoration and do everything they say – and they’re going to like it.”

  “Good luck with that,” I said.

  “You just wait,” Kelsey said. “It’s going to happen. It’s going to be awesome.”

  “What’s going to be awesome?”


  I recognized the voice before I turned around. When I saw Caitlyn, I plastered a tight smile on my face. Since our altercation in the hallway, we’d only interacted in class – and as infrequently as possible even then.

  “Who invited you?”

  “Tally and I are friends,” Caitlyn said. “She invited me.”

  “She’s not very bright,” I said, focusing on the figure standing a few feet behind her. “Aric.”

  “Zoe.”

  “How are you this fine evening?”

  Aric placed his tongue in his cheek, his dimples poking out as he regarded me. “I’m fine. How are you?”

  “Fanfreakingtastic,” I said. “Things just couldn’t be better.”

  Caitlyn narrowed her eyes suspiciously. “Why are you in such a good mood?”

  “Because I’m awesome,” I replied. “I’m just basking in my general greatness.”

  “You think a lot of yourself, don’t you?”

  “You have no idea,” I shot back. “The beer is over there.” I pointed. “Have fun.”

  “I have to go to the bathroom,” Caitlyn said. “Can I go inside first?”

  “Nope.”

  “Why not?”

  “The bathroom is broken,” I said. “You have to use the neighbors’ bathroom.”

  “If the bathroom is broken, why did you throw a party?”

  “You’ll have to ask Tally,” I replied. “It was her idea.”

  “Oh, Kevin is here,” Kelsey announced. “You don’t need me, right? You can be mean to her all on your own.”

  “I think I’m up to the challenge,” I agreed.

  Aric’s shoulders were shaking with silent laughter, while Caitlyn’s were doing the same for an entirely different reason. “I don’t need to put up with your abuse,” she said.

  “Then leave.”

  “Tally invited me.”

  “Then stay,” I said. “I don’t really care what you do. You’re not my concern.”

  Seth picked that moment to interrupt, handing cups of beer to Paris and me. He smiled at Caitlyn and Aric, picking up on the hostility, but clearly not sure how to react. “Good evening, ladies.”