Circles the Trilogy (Secrets and Lies)

by Carla Buchanan

  At this point I feel sorry for the Judge. He keeps his composure, but I can see that he knows what he is supposed to say, but he can’t bring himself to say it. He probably genuinely believes that I’ve had a miscarriage since his expression is somber but composed at the same time. I see Mrs. Bryant squeeze his hand as she steps forward, pulling Daryn along with her. Judge Bryant allows her to step up to the microphone. They stand there, a united front, as Mrs. Bryant answers their questions. Well she doesn’t really answer their questions, she gives her own little mini speech.

  She looks up at Daryn. He nods as if he is giving her the go ahead to say what she is about to say. “First, I would like to thank everyone who has come to support my husband today. This morning, our family received some devastating news. Our son Daryn and his fiancée had been expecting their first child, but unfortunately our Sasha has suffered a miscarriage. As you can imagine, this is a hard time for Sasha and Daryn. Together our family made a decision that Sasha would not be ready to make this appearance after just finding out about her loss this morning. She sends her love and support for this endeavor my husband and our family have embarked upon. We hope that you respect her privacy as my son and his fiancée grieve over their loss. Thank you.”

  Daryn kisses his mother and they all wave to the crowd. More questions are thrown their way but they exit the platform and then the video stops.

  I sit there stunned by what I’ve just witnessed. I don’t know what to feel in this moment. All I know is that while I was not there, a part of my life was being planned for me. I can’t even imagine the types of questions that I will have to answer over the next few weeks. I know that Mrs. Bryant has told the media to give us privacy, but I have no doubt that she probably already has interviews lined up. She will use this lie to gain the sympathy vote and it will work.

  “So I need you to make this clear for me. Did you know she was going to do this or did you not know?” At this point I can feel myself getting angry. He is being purposely vague about his part in all this. I think he thought the video would make me feel better, but it has only made me forget about the night we had together and instead made me angry. I don’t want to be paraded around in front of the media. I don’t want to be used as some pawn to help Judge Bryant win an election.

  “We discussed a few ways we could cover for your absence, but in the end I left the decision up to her. I think I had a feeling she would use the miscarriage angle but I wasn’t sure. I knew she was leaning towards it since she said it would be best for the campaign. Sasha, I’m sorry.” I am sitting on the side of the bed turned away from Daryn. He slides in closer to me and attempts to kiss me on the neck. I pull away. I’m angry. The anger is turning into fury so I get up and walk into the bathroom to take a shower. I think if I speak again, I may something I will regret later on.

  As I’m entering the bathroom, my worst fears come true when he says, “Wear something nice today, Honey. We have an interview with the Society page reporter from the paper. They’ll be asking about the wedding and taking pictures.”

  “And asking about the ‘miscarriage’,” I say under my breath as I go into the bathroom and shut the door. I’m not sure why I’m so angry now and I wasn’t this angry yesterday. I guess actually seeing the deception on display right before my eyes makes it more real. It makes me realize how truly despicable Mrs. Bryant is for coming up with this and Daryn is for agreeing with it. What does it say about me?

  ***

  Hours later, the interview is over and I am exhausted. After getting ready this morning, Daryn and I had a private breakfast meeting with his mother where she drilled me on the possible questions that would be asked in regards to the wedding, the election, and the ‘miscarriage’. Of course, once the interview took place, Daryn did most of the talking and was able to lie so smoothly that I wondered if I knew Daryn at all. If he could easily lie about something so important then I wonder what else he has lied about.

  During the interview Daryn held my hand. My hands were sweaty and shaky and I stuttered over the questions I made an attempt to answer. We did just as his mother told us. We gave each other loving looks and laughed at the appropriate times, but of course it was all fake. Well at least my part was fake. My mind was on other things, or more specifically, other people. I couldn’t get my mind off Quinton and the day we’d had together. I kept replaying the way my jaws hurt from smiling so much that day.

  I can’t seem to go a few minutes without thinking about his lips on mine and the way I fantasized about him while I was making love to Daryn. I probably should feel some way about doing that, but really I don’t. That may say something about me or the kind of person I am but I don’t care. I am taking my punishment like a woman and if I have to be punished by being married to Daryn for the rest of my life, I plan to take those moments I had with Quinton and hold on to them for dear life.

  A week later, after a hand full of interviews for the paper and a couple local television stations, I’m exhausted. My anger and complete exhaustion must show on my face because everyone believes the story without question which is good, I guess. It seems as though the hoopla surrounding the miscarriage announcement is beginning to die down. The only reporter that is still like a dog with a bone is that stupid Society page reporter. She is ruthless in her pursuit and she doesn’t seem at all satisfied with the story we’ve given her. She may not be so stupid after all. I’m beginning to think she knows something more, but I have no idea what it could be. She seems to be focused on me for some reason like I am the one who is running for office.

  Our engagement party is put off, thankfully, but it is only pushed back a few weeks and now it will be held on Independence Day. I have to give it to Ella. She is a genius at timing and image and having the engagement party on the holiday will get a lot of free press for the Judge.

  Neesa and I are still strained. I have not had a chance to sit down and have a decent conversation with her since this whole thing started and I feel guilty. We send the occasional text to check on one another, but I’ve been staying with Daryn so I haven’t seen her.

  I feel so alone not seeing Neesa every day though I have had a constant stream of people coming in and out of Daryn’s condo. My mother has now accepted everything that went down, Saleena is still jealous, and my brother, Samuel, is the only one I feel comfortable around. He is the typical man who doesn’t want to discuss wedding plans or miscarriages, or Senate races. I love him for it because we talk about his life and his new job he’ll be starting soon. He’ll be moving away from Atlanta and heading to West Coast to work for one of the top technology firms in Silicon Valley. I’m so proud of him and I so glad that he is getting away from this place. I’ll miss him but he is his own man. Like me, he doesn’t really like being a part of these circles that tell you who to date, how to behave, or what clothes to wear.

  He reminds me of Quinton with his cocky streak that all of the woman love. He is confident, slightly arrogant yet he has a sensitive side to him that others rarely get to see. I see it when I’m with him and it is mostly pity, but that’s okay. I like to see the softer side of him just like I liked seeing the softer, sweeter side of Quinton.

  God, I miss that man.

  It has only been a few weeks since I spent that day with Quinton and I can say that I think I fell in love with him from the moment I saw him. I know it seems ridiculous to think that I am in love with someone I’ve only known a few weeks, but I think he knows me better than Daryn will ever know me.

  Quinton is intuitive, smart, ruggedly sexy, and attentive and I feel I can talk to him about anything without being afraid of being judged. I wish I could call him or go see him at his office. I wish I knew what he thought about how we left things that day. I wish I could talk to him and find out what he thinks about the coverage of the supposed miscarriage. I wonder does he believe I lied to him when I told him that I wasn’t pregnant. I wonder all of these things but it doesn’t matter because I don’t have his number and I can’t ri
sk going to Watch Records even though my best friend works there.

  ***

  The past month has been hectic. It’s the day before the engagement party and I convinced Daryn that I need to stay at the apartment tonight. I tell him that I need to spend some time with my maid of honor and he reluctantly agrees. I think me staying with him for these past weeks had more to do with the fact that he and his mother thought that I may crack and reveal our lie to someone, but I would never do that no matter how much I want to do so.

  When I walk into the apartment, I smile. Neesa is in the kitchen making one of her famous smoothies. I run over to her and jump on her. I apologize over and over for being such a bad friend, but she simply brushes me off.

  “Oh my God, I’ve missed you soooo much,” I squeal at Neesa.

  She laughs at me. I know I’m acting childish, but I love this girl so much and this is longest I’ve gone without seeing her since first meeting her. I want to know about everything she’s been doing and if she’s seeing anyone. I also want to ask about Quinton, but I’m afraid to hear what he may have said to her about me.

  She pushes a green smoothie across the counter to me and I sigh. This feel like home. I’ve missed these mornings where we sit sipping on smoothies and talking about the interesting things going on with her while she listens to me complain about how I don’t fit into the social circle I’m forced to be a part of.

  “I’ve missed you too, girl. We have so much to catch up on. I shouldn’t tell you a damn thing since you have basically abandoned me, but I can’t contain myself.” She does exaggerated movements with her hands while she is talking and I wonder why she is being so animated since it is so unlike her. Then I see it. A flash. Light catches it and I scream at the massive rock weighing down the ring finger on her left hand.

  “What the fuck?” I scream at her and pull her hand toward me. I almost make her knock her smoothie off of the counter in the process, but this is so great. She beams at me and when I ask her if this is from Roc she nods and starts to cry. I never see her cry.

  “Sasha,” she says between sniffles, “I am so happy. I mean, I know this is fast but it feels so right.”

  “I know, Sweetie. But why didn’t you tell me? I didn’t even know you and Roc had started dating.”

  She hesitates for a second. “I – I didn’t want to throw my good news in your face when I while you were going through so much. You have to remember that I know the truth about the miscarriage. I know the truth about your feelings about getting married to Daryn. I just didn’t –”

  “Don’t you dare. I love you. I’m ecstatic for you. And I want to hear everything. Tell me how this started and got to this point. It’s only been a couple months so it had to be a whirlwind romance.”

  She is so giddy, I can’t help but feed off of her excitement. She tells me that the night after my whole drama started there was an event that got out of hand. Roc pulled this guy in the off of her who was drunk and not taking no for an answer. The drunken guy couldn’t keep his hands to himself and when she slapped the guy, he reached down and put his hands around her neck. With her being so petite, the guy had her up off the ground. There were so many people in the club that night that no one really noticed what was going on; luckily, Roc wasn’t one of those people. Just as the guy was about to drop her to the floor where she would have surely broken a bone, Roc stepped in.

  With very quick reflexes, Roc approached the guy from the side, punching him in the jaw. As the guy went down, Roc caught her before she fell to the floor. Other members of security stepped in and tossed the guy out of the club and Roc literally carried her away to Quinton’s limo. He brought her back to the apartment and stayed all night. He wouldn’t let her lift a finger for the next two days. He waited on her hand and foot. He went out and got pain medicine for her, he cooked for her, and he even ran baths for her. She said that he was the perfect gentleman, choosing to sleep on the couch each night he was there.

  She said she couldn’t take it any longer so she made her move. She called him into the room one night saying she was in pain. He started to massage her neck where the bruises were. She turned in his arms and kissed him. He protested, saying she wasn’t ready for him in that way since she was still healing but Neesa wasn’t trying to hear any of that. She said she hopped off the bed and started to strip right in front of him. He couldn’t resist after that and they have seen each other every day since.

  She said that she never expected to propose so soon but there is no way she would’ve said no. They’d professed their love for one another only after a week of dating, but it was the past weekend when he’d proposed.

  He’d insisted that they walk through the park after going to lunch one afternoon. She really wanted to go back to his place and have sex, but he’d turned her down. She said she was so angry that he would have the nerve to turn her down that she pouted in the car on the way to the park and during most of their walk. She said there were a lot of people at the park that day and as she walked through this one group of people, they started to sing Barbara Streisand’s song, What Are You Doing for the Rest of Your Life. She said she really didn’t understand what was going on until Roc stopped her in the middle of the group as they started a slow dancing flash mob around her. When she turned around to him, he was on one knee before her.

  By the time she finishes the story we’re both bawling our eyes out so we barely hear the knock on the door.

  “Oh that is probably him now. I told him that he has to get your approval before we’re officially official,” she says laughing through her tears. She gets up and goes to the door and when she opens it, the show they put on has me blushing all the way down to my toes. They are a sight to see with her only being a couple inches over five feet and him being and him being a few inches shorter than seven feet. He looks even more buff than he did the night at the club with his simple distressed jeans, white t-shirt and slip-on sandals. I can see exactly what she sees in the gorgeous monster of a man and I can also see how much in love they are. I start to cry all over again. My sniffles get their attention and they pull away from each other, both of them grinning like idiots.

  I walk over to him and give him a huge hug. “Nice to see you again, Roc. Thank you for making my friend happy!”

  Roc doesn’t say anything. He simply nods and hands over a bag with the very familiar green, white, and red Krispy Kreme logo. “Thanks, Baby,” she says to him before pulling on his t-shirt so he’ll bend down and give her another kiss.

  I slowly move away before their exchange turns heated again. “I’ll just give you two a moment. I’m going to go in my room and return some calls.” I walk a few feet and turn around to them. “Oh and by the way, Roc, you’re officially official now because you definitely have my approval.” He thanks me in that deep voice of his and I disappear into my room.

  Ten – A Messed Up Night

  I don’t have any calls to return, well I do, but I don’t want to. Talking to my mother, Daryn, or Mrs. Bryant right now will simply ruin my good mood. I’m sure they’re interrogating Daryn on why he would allow me to return to my apartment the day before the engagement party. Ella has already informed me that she wanted me to do a final fitting today as well as go over how Daryn and I will make our entrance. She also wanted to go over how I will wear my hair and makeup, but I neglected to tell Daryn any of this for fear he’d try and make me stay.

  I needed to get away and spend some time with my best friend and now I’m glad that I did. I’ve missed so much over the past weeks and I don’t want to miss any more. I smile as I think about Neesa and the fun we’ll have planning her wedding and I tear up again. I hate to be jealous of her, but I am. Don’t get me wrong, I couldn’t be happier, but I so wish that I could have that kind of happiness for myself.

  As if someone is reading my thoughts, my phone rings. I don’t recognize the number, so I don’t answer. A moment later I get a text from the same number.

  Unknown Number: I heard f
rom a reliable source that my Society Girl would be around today. I’m downstairs. Mind if I come say hello?

  My whole body heats up at the thought that Quinton is downstairs. I look at the text and smile. I want to see him so badly, though I don’t know if this is a good idea. I take a few minutes before I respond though I realize how rude it is to have him waiting.

  Me: Sure. Come on up.

  I sit my phone down and run into the living room. I immediately realize that I didn’t tell him the code to the elevator or the number for our apartment. I let a string of curses and start to go get my phone when Neesa stops me.

  “Roc already went to get him. I put Roc on the approved list as well as Quinton.”

  I lift an eyebrow at her. I wonder how she knew I would say yes to allowing Quinton up to come see me, but this is my best friend and she knows me well enough that I don’t even have to question her.

  My heart is beating fast and my palms are sweaty in anticipation. I have a horrible thought and look over at Neesa, but today her ability to read my mind in uncanny because she says, “I had Daryn’s name removed from the list since Roc had been over here so much. I didn’t want him to walk in on anything he didn’t need to see. Plus, I figured if you came here, it would be to get away from him and that would defeat the purpose if he could just walk in.”

  I grab her and pull her small frame to my body. I practically crush her as I plant a kiss on her cheek. The door swings open and I hear Roc say, “Damn. Y’all could’ve waited for us. We want to join in on this party.”

  It’s the most I’ve heard him say, but it makes us all laugh. Neesa goes over to him and smacks him playfully on the chest. “Okay, Rochester, don’t make me say your full-name in front of everyone.” He quickly snaps his mouth closed.