The Frog Earl

by Carola Dunn

  Naturally, Maria was full of curiosity about Harriet's noble companion. Harriet hoped she managed to persuade her that his bringing her was purely a gallant gesture, and practically forced on him by Mimi. When she described how Mimi had extorted two dances at the assembly from Lord Litton, Maria laughed and agreed that nothing could be read into the viscount's escort.

  They returned to Salters Green in the late afternoon. Lord Litton drew up his team before the vicarage gate and reached into his coat pocket.

  “You must think me very remiss at paying my debts,” he said, “when you sang to me so delightfully the other evening. Here you are. I trust it is sufficiently plain for you.”

  Harriet fumbled a little as she unwrapped the tissue paper and took out a fan. The sticks were varnished bamboo, quite plain enough to satisfy scruples—and to disappoint. Opening it, she found an exquisitely delicate painting of wild roses, palest pink on white parchment. There was nothing half so lovely in the shops of Salters Green; he must have gone to Nantwich or Chester to buy it.

  “Oh,” she breathed, “it is quite, quite perfect.”

  “When the wild roses are blooming,” he quoted himself—was he looking at her flushed cheeks?— “I wonder why anyone would choose to spend June in town.”

  Taking his hand to descend from the curricle, Harriet knew that, if she never saw him again, as long as she lived she would remember this day.

  * * * *

  After a day spent with Wickham, Simon left Intrepid in the Mere House stables and went into the house. He reached the entrance hall just as Gerald came through the front door.

  “Have you had a pleasant day, coz?” he asked, grinning. “I've never seen anyone so neatly maneuvered. Mimi's something of an expert, of course.”

  “Miss Lassiter is a kindhearted girl,” said Gerald enigmatically.

  Before Simon could inquire as to his meaning, Baird appeared and scooped a couple of letters off the hall table.

  “The post, my lord,” he announced. “If you want your letters presented on a silver salver, I fear you will be forced to wait a few minutes, as I'm cleaning it.”

  “Ah, yes, I seem to recall that one of the vital duties of a butler is cleaning the silver,” said Gerald. “Hand them over, man.”

  “My lord.” Bowing, Baird complied.

  Gerald glanced at the addresses as he and Simon headed up the stairs to change. “Oh lord,” he groaned, “one from my mother. And one from Billings, who, I surmise, has been forced to divulge my whereabouts. I daresay my sins were bound to find me out sooner or later.”

  “Sins?” Simon asked, still puzzling over his cousin's description of Mimi.

  “You may recall, coz, that I left the makings of a scandal behind me in town and retreated here to avoid Mama's interrogation. The tabbies will have informed her long since that I encouraged Lady Elizabeth to hope for an offer and then abandoned her.” Waving to Simon to follow, he went into his dressing room, took a paper knife from his dressing table and broke open both seals.

  “Oh yes, Lady Elizabeth. But that was ages ago—it seems like another lifetime.”

  “A nine-days wonder, no doubt; she will have snared another suitor by now. But Mama will want the full story from my lips. Yes, a pressing request that I satisfy her curiosity in person.” He turned to the second letter. “Now what has Billings to say in excuse for disobeying my instructions?”

  “I suppose you had to tell your agent where you were going in case of an emergency.”

  “Precisely, my dear fellow. There are matters it is unfair to expect an employee to take responsibility for, such as a row of cottages burned to the ground and three families homeless. Mama was in despair and Billings had to tell her he knew where to find me.”

  “That seems reasonable. You can't expect Aunt Cecilia to deal with such a disaster alone.”

  “No, I shall have to go to Crossfields, alas. I shall leave at dawn tomorrow. Do you go with me?”

  “I can't leave now.” If he went away, Simon felt, he would somehow forfeit the kiss Mimi owed him. “No, I still have much to learn from Wickham.”

  “You will also learn from watching me deal with this matter, you know, and I shall be coming back as soon as possible.”

  “Coming back to Cheshire?” Simon asked in surprise. “Why? You usually only come for a few days and you've been here for weeks.”

  “I want to make sure Aunt Georgina does not sell everything she owns to endow Colonel Lassiter's orphanage.” Though he laughed, Gerald sounded distinctly evasive to Simon's ears. “So, given that I shall return, will you come to Crossfields?”

  “It would be far too complicated to keep switching between my aliases.” Now Simon sounded evasive to his own ears. “I'd be bound to get caught out. No, I'll stay. Give my love to Aunt Cecilia.” He departed for his own chamber.

  Simon rose early next morning to see his cousin off. Watching him canter down the drive, he found his thoughts once more reverting to the puzzle that had kept him awake last night.

  Gerald had once called Mimi a tiresome child; now he considered her a kindhearted girl. Gerald usually spent June in London and Brighton; now he proposed to return to Cheshire as soon as possible. Could the two be connected?

  Surely Gerald wasn't planning to offer for Simon's princess!

  Chapter 16

  The sultry heat and the towering clouds gathering over the gazebo promised a storm by evening, but Mimi and Harriet didn't care. Mimi gazed gloomily at the dead brown flowers on the lilac bushes, symbols of the hopes that had bloomed so recently and withered so soon.

  “I really thought he would come to love you so much he didn't care about being a lord,” she said. “I'm sorry he's gone, Harriet.”

  “It was too much to expect.” Harriet tried to smile. “If all your plans succeeded, you would grow odiously conceited. But I have you to thank for a wonderful day with him, one I shall never forget.”

  “That's all very well, but I shan't let you wither away into a blighted old maid. Once you are married, with children of your own to care for, Gerald Litton will become a romantic memory, to treasure, not to pine over. I've let my campaign lapse but it can easily be started up again.”

  “Sir Wilfred and the others have started calling at the vicarage again. Even Mr. Lloyd has forgiven me for playing cricket.”

  “Yes, but he's forgiven me, too. Nothing I've done has put any of them off for long. I must think of something that will...” Mimi faltered, but went on resolutely, “...that will make Simon avoid me, as well as the rest. I know he could make you happy. Only he doesn't seem to take offense whatever I do, so it will have to be something truly shocking.”

  “Oh no, Mimi, pray do not.”

  “Shh, let me think.” She shivered as a moisture-laden breeze whisked through the gazebo, then the air was still and hot again. The expectant tension in the air reminded her of waiting for the monsoon to break in Bharadupatam. The temples would be full of offerings of flowers and sweetmeats, and dancers hired by farmers to please the gods and persuade them to release the life-bringing rains.

  “Mimi...”

  “Just a moment.” She held up her hand. “I have it! We shall have dancing at Salters Hall one evening next week.”

  Harriet looked at once disappointed and relieved. “That will be delightful,” she said, sounding doubtful, “even if Lord Litton is not here. But what shall you do? Step on your partners' toes?”

  “Much better than that.” Mimi giggled, restored to cheerfulness by the brilliance of her plan. “I shall perform an Indian dance.”

  “What sort of dance?” Suspicious, Harriet probed for more information, but Mimi refused to explain.

  “You will see,” she said mysteriously. “Can you come on Tuesday evening? Good, then I'll go and start writing invitations right away.”

  * * * *

  “Now, lad,” Mrs. Wickham greeted Simon, “I don't want you thinking I approve of assignations, but I know you for an honorable gentleman as w
on't bring trouble to a young lady. Better you should meet in my parlor—just the once, mind, being as she said it were urgent—than off in the fields somewheres.”

  “Miss Lassiter wants to see me? Why on earth would she come here?”

  “Nay, 'tis Miss Cooper. Never say you're after courting the both of them!”

  “Certainly not, Mrs. Wickham, you need not look so shocked. I can't imagine what Miss Cooper wants.”

  “Well, she's waiting in the parlor, lad, so go and find out. Leave the door open, mind.”

  Grinning affectionately at his mentor's plump wife, Simon obeyed.

  Harriet was standing by the window of the comfortable chintz parlor, gazing out at the neat rows of vegetables in the back garden. She turned as he entered and came toward him, looking anxious and uncertain.

  “Mr. Hurst, I beg your pardon for arranging this... this unconventional meeting. I am at my wits' end.”

  Taking her hand, he led her to a chair. “Sit down, Miss Cooper, and tell me what I may do for you. I'm entirely at your service.” He took a seat opposite her.

  “You will think me impertinent. Indeed, I ought to have approached Colonel Lassiter, and you may tell me I must do so, but... but...”

  “I'm flattered that you find me more approachable than the colonel. This matter has something to do with Mimi, I take it?”

  “I am so worried about her. I fear the colonel will either take offense, or laugh off my concern, and Mrs. Forbes has little influence over her, you know. You have received an invitation to the Hall for this evening?”

  “Yes, an informal dance, I gather. What is she up to?” Simon hid a smile, finding it difficult to take Harriet's apprehensions seriously. He liked the vicar's daughter, but her notions of propriety were decidedly straitlaced by his reckoning.

  “She means to do something scandalous.”

  He saw a chance to find out what Mimi hoped to gain by her singular behavior. “Tell me, Miss Cooper—I'm sure she confides in you—what's her purpose in doing her best to set up the backs of the entire neighborhood?”

  Harriet flushed scarlet. “She is doing it for my sake,” she said in a low voice, looking down at her hands, tightly clasped in her lap.

  “Pray don't tell me if it embarrasses you,” Simon hastened to assure her, more curious than ever.

  “No, since I have asked your help, I owe you an explanation. You see, before the Lassiters came to Salters Green, several young gentlemen in the neighborhood were... were courting me. But when Mimi arrived, they all switched their allegiance to her. So she decided to try to give them all a disgust of her so that they would come back to me.”

  Simon's heart sang. What a darling Mimi was, what a generous, kindhearted friend! Then he remembered that Gerald, too, had at last recognized her merits. His euphoria faded. As earl, and heir to a marquisate, Simon had been preferred over his cousin by the Incomparable Lady Elizabeth. As a humble bailiff, how could he hope that Mimi would choose him rather than the viscount?

  And Harriet clearly expected him to put a stop to whatever scheme Mimi presently had in mind. That would scarcely endear him to her.

  Though these thoughts flashed through his mind, his silence had been noticeable. Poor Harriet looked ready to sink. Simon leaned across and pressed her hand gently.

  “Thank you for explaining, Miss Cooper. You may trust me to keep it in strictest confidence. Now will you tell me what exactly your enterprising friend has in mind for the delectation of her guests this evening?”

  He wouldn't have thought it possible for her cheeks to grow any redder, but they did.

  “She would not tell me precisely, but I have gathered several hints. I believe she means to perform a... an indecent dance!” she burst out, and hid her flaming face in her hands.

  “Good gad!” Simon had traveled the world. He had seen belly dancers in Egypt and the equally erotic street and temple dancers of India. The idea of Mimi appearing in an English drawing room in their traditional garb, let alone performing, appalled him as thoroughly as the innocent Harriet could have wished. “Good gad,” he repeated, rising to take an agitated turn about the room, “thank heaven you had the sense and the courage to come to me.”

  “Do you think you can stop her?”

  “I can but hope so. If she's ignored your protests, I don't believe it will be the least use expostulating with her beforehand. We'll have to keep a close watch on her this evening and trust that between us we can nip her activities in the bud.”

  “You will not inform the colonel?”

  “No, I think not. I know he's able to curb her with a word, but he's an indulgent father and after so long in India I'm not sure he understands what's acceptable in England. No, it's up to the two of us. I'll rely on you to watch her as carefully as I shall myself, and warn me if you see anything untoward.”

  “Oh yes, I will. Thank you, sir.” Harriet stood up and he came to take her hands. She looked up at him shyly. “You cannot imagine what a load you have taken from my mind.”

  He grinned down at her. “Being Miss Lassiter's friend is a heavy burden at times, is it not? One might say that she is not an example of still waters running deep, but rather of a roaring torrent running deep.”

  “One never knows quite what to expect next,” she agreed, “but I would not have you think I would change her in any particular.”

  “Nor I, Miss Cooper, nor I,” he assured her.

  * * * *

  Simon recognized the spark of mischief in Mimi's eyes as he followed Aunt Georgina into the Lassiters' drawing room. She looked no different from the evening when she had played the sitar to much the same group of people, except that she was wearing an evening gown instead of a sari. Of a deep sea-green, it broke in a froth of white lace about her ankles. Pearls glowed against her dark skin at throat, wrists, and ears, and in her black hair.

  “A goddess of the southern seas,” he complimented her as he bowed over her hand.

  He was overheard by Mr. Lloyd, entering behind him, who muttered something about not expecting blasphemy from an Englishman born and bred.

  She wrinkled her enchanting little nose at Simon, and he winked at her before she turned to the parson. Harriet must be mistaken, he decided. Mimi couldn't possibly be so calm if she were about to commit an unforgivable vulgarity before the greater part of her acquaintance.

  He greeted the colonel and went on into the room. The blue and gray carpet had been rolled to one end, exposing the polished oak floor for dancing, and the furniture was arranged around the walls.

  Simon saw that Harriet had already arrived. Making his way to her, he whispered, “I cannot believe she is planning anything outrageous. She's perfectly at ease.”

  “She does not understand,” Harriet said, looking up at him pleadingly.

  She would have said more, but her father came up at that moment and spoke to Simon. Some minutes passed before he was able to turn back to Harriet and reassure her with a smile, “Don't worry, our compact holds.”

  The room was filling as the rest of the guests arrived. With a card table set up at one end, there was space for no more than four couples to stand up, Simon saw. Including himself, the usual five young gentlemen were present. Judith Cooper had come, and the Marburys had brought a chubby young lady, a cousin staying with them, so there were five young ladies also.

  Mimi was aware of the problem. She joined Simon and Harriet at that moment and said, “I needn't request your cooperation, Mr. Hurst, as one can always find a gentleman willing to sit out a dance, but Harriet, I hope you and Judith won't mind taking a turn as wallflowers. I cannot ask Sophia or her cousin. I daresay it's the duty of a hostess to yield the floor to her guests, but I should like to stand up once or twice.”

  “Of course,” Harriet said. “I shall go and speak to Judith at once.”

  She and Simon exchanged speaking glances. As long as Mimi was dancing with a partner, presumably she couldn't get up to anything too dreadful. The moments they must watch out f
or were the sets she sat out.

  Mrs. Cooper had opened the harpsichord and was looking through the music.

  “May I have the first dance, Princess?” Simon asked.

  She looked at him consideringly. “Well, I don't know. You tricked me into standing up with you at the assembly.”

  “Trickery is something you should know about,” he said, grinning. “I'm not claiming you owe me a dance, but do grant me this one.”

  She laughed and curtsied. “Thank you, sir, that will be delightful.”

  Sir Wilfred came up as she laid her hand on Simon's arm and turned toward the floor. He frowned, obviously disgruntled. In Gerald's absence he had doubtless expected to regain his former precedence, but after all, this was an informal hop not a grand ball. Mimi graciously granted him the second set.

  “And after that I'll take my turn to sit out,” she said to Simon, who at once resolved that nothing on earth should make him stand up for the third set.

  He danced the second with the Marbury cousin, who bounced through the figures with an enthusiasm he enjoyed. As the final chord twanged from the harpsichord close beside them, his gaze at once searched out Mimi.

  She came over to invite Mrs. Cooper to take a rest from playing, then signaled to Waring to bring the vicar's wife a glass of wine. With a sparkling smile at Simon, she moved on to make sure that all her guests had their desired refreshment. He watched her stroll about the room, exchanging a few words with Lady Thompson, the squire, the vicar. Her graceful movements had not changed, but she had gained in confidence since the dinner party that had been her first effort as hostess. She was at once gracious and friendly.

  He could imagine her at his side, growing with him into the positions of Earl and Countess of Derwent, and later Marquis and Marchioness of Stokesbury.