Land of My Heart

by Tracie Peterson

  “I’m glad you’re here. Koko loves you so. I’ve often wanted to thank you for being so kind to her. She’s got such a gentle heart. I knew your mother would break it over and over, and I just couldn’t let that happen.”

  “I don’t blame you,” Dianne said softly, remembering her mother’s anger. “I think Mama was afraid—afraid of what she didn’t understand or know to be familiar.”

  “Yes, I believe you’re right. Susannah never did abide those who were different. Be they people with skin of a different color or people of higher means or lesser.”

  “But she loved you, Uncle Bram. No doubting that. She used to talk about you all the time. Your letters were like cold water on a hot day.”

  “I loved her too. I’m sorry we parted on bad terms. I never meant to hurt her, and I feel responsible for what happened.” He paused for a moment, as if seeking the right words. “I don’t know if you will understand this or not, but when a man marries, I believe he owes his allegiance to his wife. I believe that’s what God calls us to do—calls us to leave our mother and father—or sisters, for that matter. Your ma wanted me to put Koko aside, to hold my blood family in higher esteem. I couldn’t do that. It wouldn’t have been fitting in the eyes of God. I hope one day you’ll understand and forgive me.”

  “There’s nothing to forgive, Uncle Bram. I already understand, and I can only hope that I will one day find a man as loving and devoted as you.”

  Bram leaned forward and grew serious. “Promise me something.”

  “If I can.”

  “Promise that if anything happens to me, you’ll be there for Koko and James.”

  “Of course,” she said, not understanding his concern. “They’re family now and family endures together.”

  Bram let out a heavy sigh. “I just need to know that you won’t let them … well … that they won’t have to resort to … going back to the Pikuni.”

  Dianne shook her head. “No, not unless Koko honestly felt that was better. But why would she? She’ll have this wonderful ranch and the new house you plan to build her.”

  Bram said nothing, so Dianne took the opportunity to ask him a favor in return. “I’d like to go to Virginia City with you next week. If you aren’t worried about Koko being here without me, I’d appreciate getting to come along.”

  “I think that can be arranged. It has been a long time since you’ve been away from here. Do you miss the big cities back East?”

  Dianne chuckled. “Not really. Sometimes I miss the convenience, but nothing more. I love my life here. I can’t imagine ever wanting to live anywhere else. I hope, if and when I find a man to marry me, that he’ll be content to remain right here. In fact, maybe I’ll find a man in Virginia City. One who will work for you and show an interest in me all at the same time.”

  “In case you haven’t noticed, missy, I’ve got a whole crew of men who’d do nothing but show you interest if you gave them the time of day.”

  Dianne laughed and got to her feet. “I’ve looked that herd over, Uncle Bram. There’s nothing there that strikes my fancy.”

  Bram stood and gave Dianne a gentle hug. “Then we’ll go looking elsewhere. If you find one that fits the bill, we’ll bring him home and get him molded into shape.”

  Dianne leaned up on tiptoe as Bram bent down. Kissing him gently on the cheek, Dianne whispered a prayer of thanks for her uncle’s love.

  “I love you, Uncle Bram.”

  “And I love you, darlin’. Now you’d best get to bed. We’re gonna start working with that sorrel gelding in the morning, and I know you want to be a part of that.”

  “Absolutely. I’ll see you in the morning.” Dianne headed into the house, the trip to Virginia City rapidly overrunning her thoughts. I’ll put flowers on Mama’s grave, and I’ll look into buying some more fabric. Then I’ll find me a husband of first-rate quality.

  CHAPTER 29

  VIRGINIA CITY HAD GROWN SOME IN BUILDINGS AND CIVILITY, BUT to Dianne it seemed that the population had diminished considerably. She couldn’t help but wonder if the lure of goldfields farther north had robbed the territorial capital of its residents. It was to be expected, she thought. After all, most of the people had wandered in from the California goldfields, restless and desperate to find that place where they might get rich easily—without ever having to work for it. It seemed only natural that they should wander once again after learning that the tales weren’t true.

  The stories Dianne had heard on the trail west had been enough to keep people entertained for hours. The very idea of picking up nuggets the size of your fist had people changing their destinations from Oregon to Montana in a heartbeat.

  “Looks like they’ve gone and got citified,” Bram mused as he eased the wagon along Wallace Street. “Less of the riffraff in the streets to be sure, although I see they’ve added a new saloon.”

  Sitting beside her uncle, Dianne looked left and right, taking in the sights and making mental comparisons. He was right. The streets seemed much more orderly, and there were many lovely clapboard homes, homes that certainly hadn’t been there when she had lived in town.

  “Looks like the sawmill is doing a booming business,” Morgan said, seeming to note the focus of Dianne’s thoughts. Zane and Morgan had accompanied them, Zane to get information regarding army enlistment and Morgan to hear all the news that could be had about the territory.

  “We’d best check out the hotel and see if we can get some rooms,” Bram said. He then motioned to the back of the wagon. “I know you’re anxious to get those flowers on your mother’s grave, so why don’t you go ahead on up to the cemetery and I’ll take care of the hotel.”

  Dianne nodded. “Should I take the wagon or ride Dolly?”

  “The road’s pretty steep. I’d take Dolly if I were you. You boys go with her so she’s not alone.”

  Zane and Morgan nodded. “We’d figured to pay our respects,” Zane added.

  “Good. Then I won’t worry about our girl. Who knows what kind of ruffians she might run into.” Dianne wasn’t all that concerned. The town seemed much calmer than when she’d lived here and spent considerable time by herself. “You boys go on down to the livery and let them know what we’ll need.”

  “Sure thing, Uncle Bram.” They turned their horses in unison and headed to the stable.

  Uncle Bram pulled the wagon up in front of the hotel. “I’ll check on whether they have any rooms available while you get Dolly saddled,” he told Dianne as he helped her down from the wagon.

  Dianne went immediately to work, hoisting her saddle from the back of the wagon as if it were no heavier than a picnic basket. She’d grown strong over the past years. She was able to do a great many things that she’d found impossible when they’d first arrived. Saddling her own horse was just one of them.

  “They have plenty of space,” Bram announced, coming back just as Dianne was gathering up the wildflowers she’d picked for her mother’s grave. “You go ahead, and when you come back, just ask for your room. It’ll adjoin the room the boys and I will share.”

  Dianne took up Dolly’s reins. “We won’t be long. I’m getting pretty hungry, so I’m betting the boys are feeling fairly done in. I notice the hotel also has an eatery; do you suppose it would be all right to get our supper there tonight?”

  Bram grinned. “I had the same thought myself. How about you see to your delivery, then come back and wash up. I’ll let them know we’ll be planning on a meal posthaste.” He glanced down the road. “Ah, good. Here come Zane and Morgan.”

  Dianne mounted Dolly. “Come on, boys, we’d best get to it.”

  They rode to the cemetery, commenting about the town and all its changes. Dianne found the place a bit more appealing than when they’d lived there, but only marginally. There still weren’t any trees of substance, although it appeared several folks had planted small saplings in the hopes of regrowing the forest that had once surrounded the town.

  The tiny cemetery was nestled up in the hills n
orth of town. The roads there were indeed steep and not very accommodating. Dolly, as surefooted as ever, handled the trip easily, however, and Dianne had little trouble keeping her seat and balancing the flowers across her lap.

  “It’s such a lonely place,” Morgan said as they approached the collection of graves.

  “Yes, but the view is quite impressive from this high up,” Dianne said as she dismounted. Dolly whinnied softly as if agreeing. Dianne dropped Dolly’s reins, knowing the mare would not wander. Dianne had worked hard for two years to teach Dolly this was her signal to stay put. The mare had learned quite well.

  Morgan and Zane, taking the hats from their heads, remained mounted and quiet as Dianne took the flowers to their mother’s grave. She brushed away the bits of debris and noted that the new headstone, ordered on their previous fall trip, had been put into place.

  “It looks nice, doesn’t it?” Dianne asked, looking to her brothers.

  “It looks good,” Zane murmured and Morgan nodded in agreement. Both seemed most uncomfortable with their task.

  Dianne took pity on the boys. She placed the flowers at the foot of the stone and whispered a prayer before climbing back atop Dolly. The wind picked up and blew her wide-brimmed hat from her head, but the loose rawhide straps under her chin kept it from going any farther than her back. Wisps of blond hair blew delicately across Dianne’s face.

  She sighed and looked down across the town. “I guess we’d best head back.”

  They moved back down the hill at a leisurely pace. Dianne wanted to say something more, but she didn’t. The twins remained silent as well. It was as if a door had so completely closed on that part of their lives that they had no desire to reopen it. Dianne wondered if they felt guilty over what had happened. They’d never talked about it. Never once since their mother had died.

  “You know,” she began, “I think in spite of all that happened, losing the girls and Mama, it was still right to come west.”

  The boys said nothing, so she continued. “I used to feel really guilty about Mama dying, but I came to realize that everything is in God’s timing. I can’t keep a person alive if the Lord is calling her home. And I can’t change things once everything is said and done.”

  “But sometimes it’s hard to understand God doing things like He does,” Morgan said. “I can’t say that I’d do it all over again if I had the chance. I might have come on my own, but I would never have voted for bringing you girls.”

  “Me either,” Zane said in a barely audible voice. “Montana doesn’t seem like a good place for women.”

  “Well, I beg to differ with you,” Dianne said. “I feel like Montana is a home I never knew. It feels right living here, and I’ll be just as content to die here as well.”

  They reached the hotel and the boys took the horses to the livery while Dianne made her way inside. Someday she’d show the twins that Montana was the perfect place for her. She wasn’t sure what it would take to convince them, but she’d show them.

  “I’m Dianne Chadwick. My uncle arranged a room for me,” she said in greeting to the hotel clerk. “His name is Bram Vandyke.”

  The clerk, probably ten years her senior, smiled and leaned forward. “He did indeed, but he didn’t tell me what a purty young thing you were. Are you married?”

  Dianne knew that for every available woman in Montana, there were at least fifty bachelors lined up to court her. She didn’t want to hurt the man’s feelings, but he definitely did not fit her idea of husband material.

  “No, but I am in a hurry to wash up and get something to eat.” She smiled and added, “So if you’d give me the key and direct me to my room, I’d be much obliged.”

  The clerk looked at her for a moment, as if trying to decide if it was worth his trouble to try sweet-talking her again. Apparently he figured her to be determined. He reached behind him to the cubby box and pulled the key out for her room.

  “Do you need help with your things?” he asked, his tone sounding hopeful.

  “No, my uncle should have seen to my bag. Besides, my two brothers are right behind me. They’ll bring anything we’ve forgotten.”

  He nodded but looked very disappointed.

  Dianne hurried to her room and unlocked the door to find that Uncle Bram had already opened the door between the two rooms. Her bag was on the floor at the foot of her bed and the draperies had been pulled back to let in the light.

  “Uncle Bram?” she called, peering around the adjoining door.

  “I’m here. Just washing this grime off my neck.” He was bent over the washbasin, water dripping from his neck and beard.

  “I’d probably better do the same,” Dianne said. “Give me a few minutes and I’ll be ready.”

  She closed the door between the rooms and went to her bag. Pulling out a fresh blouse, she bemoaned all the wrinkles. For all her care, there was very little she could do on the trail to keep herself neat and orderly. Koko had told her that’s why buckskin was so nice, and in truth, the jacket Koko had made for Dianne from doeskin needed a dusting but otherwise looked just fine.

  Dampening the blouse a bit helped to pull some of the wrinkles out, but it still wasn’t to Dianne’s liking. She quickly rid herself of the blouse she’d worn on the trail, however, and after washing up, donned the new blouse, wrinkles and all. She was just combing out her hair when a knock sounded on the adjoining door.

  “Come in,” she called.

  “Are you ready yet, sis? I’m famished.”

  It was Morgan, and he looked at her with such a hangdog expression that Dianne had to laugh. “I’m ready.” She took up a rawhide strip and tied her hair back in a loose tail at the nape of her neck. “I won’t even bother to pin my hair up,” she declared as she joined her brother. “I wouldn’t want to be accused of starving you to death.”

  They found seats in the small hotel eatery and ordered the beef stew and biscuits. The meal was quickly laid before them, along with hot coffee that Dianne found much too strong for her liking.

  “I’ve already heard some news,” Bram said as they dug into their meal. “The hotel clerk told me the town is looking to get itself federal patent. That will require resurveying the city boundaries. Don’t know how long it will take, but they think it necessary with the growing number of people moving to the territory.”

  “But there are fewer people here now than before,” Dianne said. “At least it appears that way.”

  “Well, granted, a lot of the miners have moved on, but the city fathers are hoping to draw in folks who will stick around and not be given over to leaving every time a new strike is discovered.”

  “Well, after supper, I intend to go see what I can find out about joining the army,” Zane announced.

  Dianne opened her mouth to speak but instead found a familiar voice offering a greeting.

  “Evening, Mr. Vandyke, Zane, Morgan.” Cole Selby paused as Dianne looked up to meet his eyes. “Miss Chadwick.”

  “Cole! It’s good to see you,” Bram said as he stood up and shook his hand. “How are you faring? We haven’t heard from you in … what … two years?”

  “I guess at least that,” Cole admitted.

  “Are you here for supper? If so, why don’t you join us?”

  “I wouldn’t want to intrude.”

  “Nonsense. Pull up a chair.”

  Dianne listened to the exchange, never once saying a word. Cole looked a bit thinner, his hair a little longer, but he was still the same handsome man. She swallowed hard but felt like her mouth had turned to cotton. She thought of her ambition to come to Virginia City to find a man who might have the potential to be her husband. Here she was face to face with the only man who’d ever caused her thoughts to go in that direction, yet he apparently had never been inclined to think likewise toward Dianne.

  Cole did as Bram instructed and positioned himself between Morgan and Zane. “Have you been in town for long?” he asked, his gaze once again going to Dianne.

  “No. We just
pulled in. Needed to come for a few more supplies and to find some men who might like to work for me.”

  “I’d like to be considered for that job,” Cole said, surprising Dianne so much that she gave the tiniest gasp.

  Everyone looked to her as if she were choking. “I’m sorry,” she managed to say. “That was rude, but I must say I was surprised.”

  “I am too,” Bram declared. “I always told you I’d hire you back on in a heartbeat, so what made you stay here in Virginia City, knowing I’d give you a job?”

  Cole looked to the table and shook his head. “I haven’t always been right here in Virginia City. But either way, I guess I figured you would have forgotten about that by now or else had enough men to help.”

  They paused the conversation long enough for Cole to put in his order for food and coffee, and then Bram immediately started in again. “Do you have any friends who might like a job? They’d need to be dependable and not given to just hanging on until the next strike.”

  “I might know some,” Cole said, his expression thoughtful. “I figure there might be three or four who could give you an honest day’s work.”

  “I’d like to meet them. Could you bring them by here tomorrow morning?”

  Cole nodded. “Sure. If that’s what you want.”

  A small man who reminded Dianne of Percy Showalter served Cole his supper, then offered more coffee to Bram and the boys. Dianne thought about asking for tea but decided against it. She didn’t want Cole to think she was less than capable of bucking up under the circumstances. She didn’t know why his good opinion mattered to her, but it did.

  As they ate, she thought of all the time that had passed since she’d last seen Cole. How often she had watched the horizon, hoping he might return to the Vandyke ranch. She’d even prayed he might come back, but to no avail. Yet here he was now. Sitting there eating and talking as if no more than a day had passed.

  “So what news have you heard?” Bram asked Cole.

  “Well, there’s Indian troubles aplenty on the plains. A company called the Union Pacific is trying to put in a railroad from Omaha—it’s going to be part of the rail system that goes all the way to the Pacific. When it’s finished it will allow travel from the East Coast to the West.”