Donut A Day

by Sattler, Gail

  “I thought we talked about this yesterday.”

  He helped himself to another large slice of pizza. “Not really. Besides, last night I was talking about the case to the staff sergeant. He asked a few questions about my informant. That’s you.”

  Sarah nearly forgot to breathe. “Informant?” she squeaked. Visions of filthy and desperate junkies with long, unwashed hair making clandestine meetings with undercover cops all dressed in black flashed through her mind. She was none of the above.

  “Jeff, he’s one of the staff sergeants, mentioned about coworkers. He reminded me that we haven’t talked about everyone else who works there. If other employees might be involved or have seen something, it’s not a good idea to poke around and ask questions. Yes, we want to know, but if you start asking people, your cover is blown. And with the likes of Kincaid, that would be very dangerous.”

  “Then what am I supposed to do?”

  As soon as the words left her mouth, she realized what she had done. She had just admitted, in not so many words, that figuratively she was going to stay out of the closet, but she hadn’t intended to stop looking for information that would lead to Kincaid’s arrest, even if that meant Donnie would go down with him. Not only was the money laundering illegal, the source that money was coming from was drugs, and now Donnie was selling drugs too. She couldn’t not do something when she had an opportunity to stop an ongoing problem to society. She thought of all the children she would be teaching when she finally finished at the university and how badly children and teens could get messed up on drugs. She would do whatever could be done to get the pushers off the streets.

  “All you can do is watch and listen. If you hear other staff talking and something comes up that sounds suspicious, tell me about it. Then the police can decide if it means anything. I guess what I’m trying to say is, all I want you to do is keep your eyes and ears open and don’t do anything else.”

  “And stay out of the closet.”

  “That’s especially where I don’t want you to go.” Matt lifted a piece of pizza to his face and opened his mouth.

  “But what if I need the broom?”

  Matt froze. He sighed, closed his mouth, and lowered the pizza to his plate. “You know what I mean. By the way, while I was out today, I bought you something.” He leaned to one side and patted a cell phone on the side of his belt. “And I bought this for me.”

  While he was still sitting crooked, Matt pulled a small velvet bag out of his pocket.

  Sarah’s breath caught. The bag he held was specifically for jewelry. As he untied the silk string, she saw the outline of something round at the bottom of the bag. The only round piece of jewelry she could think of was a ring.

  She didn’t want a ring from Matt. A ring meant emotional connection. Commitment. It implied a relationship. She didn’t want to get involved in a relationship that had no possibility of a future. She couldn’t contemplate a life of being married to a man who one day might never come home from work. Therefore, she wasn’t going to let such a relationship begin.

  It didn’t matter what kind of ring it was. Even if it were a simple mood ring. She couldn’t accept it.

  Before she could think of a way to turn him down that wouldn’t hurt his feelings, he poked two fingers in the bag, and groped inside. Slowly, he started to pull his fingers out. Along with his fingers followed a gold chain.

  Sarah allowed herself to breathe. As he repositioned his grasp on the bag, she recognized the logo as that of a well-known, fine-quality jewelry store. The logo and the bright shine of the chain told her it was real gold. A chain, she could accept, although she felt hesitant about accepting something so expensive.

  She didn’t know why Matt would want to buy her something so fine, especially jewelry. He’d kissed her once, but that had been under emotional duress. They didn’t have the kind of relationship that warranted expensive jewelry. Still, she couldn’t not accept it. Even though Matt, the cop, frightened her, she was becoming increasingly fond of Matt, the man. Out of uniform, she liked him very much.

  As the last part of the chain appeared from the bag, so did a round pendant about the size of a penny, dangling from the chain. It appeared to be a locket, because it had a small clasp on one side. However, the gold color of the pendant didn’t shine the same way as the necklace. On the locket’s case was a strange embossed pattern more suited for a child than an adult. Considering the cost and beauty of the necklace, the size and quality of the locket didn’t match.

  He slid his chair closer to hers. “Turn around, and I’ll put it on you.”

  She didn’t turn around immediately. Instead, she watched Matt, with his large fingers, fumbling with the dainty clasp. Sarah knew she could open it easier than he could, but she didn’t want to spoil the moment for him.

  When he finally managed to open it, he held the necklace open. Sarah squirmed in the chair so her back was mostly toward him so he could drape the chain around her neck and refasten the clasp.

  “I want you to wear this, especially when you’re at work.”

  She raised one hand and pressed the locket to her chest. The chain itself was virtually weightless, but in comparison, the locket felt quite heavy. She found it very odd that Matt would choose such a fine chain, and, to put it bluntly, pick such an ugly, mismatched locket.

  “Thank you. This is such a surprise. Is there a picture of you inside?”

  She ran her fingers along the grain of the pattern. She didn’t want to like Matt, but she couldn’t help herself, she did. She hoped against hope that he had put a picture of himself inside.

  “Nope. No picture. It’s a transmitter.”

  Sarah’s fingers froze in the center of the locket. “It’s a what?”

  “Open it. Can you feel the little button in there? That was the only locket I could find that would fit the housing. I glued it inside.”

  As instructed, she flipped the clasp. She craned her neck and tried to focus on what should have been a picture. Sure enough, a small metal casing with a red button in the middle was glued inside the locket.

  “How romantic. . . ,” she muttered.

  Once more, he patted the cell phone, then reached for another piece of pizza. “If you push that button, I’ve got the receiver here. It’s set to vibrate and not ring so I can wear it when I’m on duty. If I can’t attend, I’ll radio for backup, and someone else will come. Just remember, with no ability for voice transmission, you have to understand that if you push it, I’ll assume you’re at Donnie’s Donuts, and that’s where I’ll go. The vibration-only kind was the only one that would fit inside a small locket. The ones that can transmit a voice are too big to hide.”

  Visions of the commercial for infirmed or elderly people living on their own, wearing similar things around their necks, flashed through her mind. She reached up and ran her fingers through her still-brown hair.

  “I don’t know what to say.”

  Matt wiped his mouth with the napkin and dropped it on the plate. He’d eaten at least half a large pizza by himself, just for lunch. “Say you’ll wear it every second you’re at Donnie’s Donuts, and if something happens, you’ll push the button.”

  She snapped the locket closed. “I will.”

  Matt stood. “Great. Before I go back to bed, I’ve got a few things to do to get ready for work tonight, so I’ve got to go. You can finish the rest of the pizza.”

  Sarah stood as well, and followed him to the door. Just as the last time when she saw him out, as she reached for the doorknob, one of his feet blocked the way, so she couldn’t open the door.

  He reached down and gently lifted the locket and ran his thumb over it. “I’m worried about you, Sarah. This has mushroomed into much more than simple money laundering. If Kincaid is supplying drugs to Donnie, he’s supplying elsewhere. With his history, this could be the catalyst to a very big drug operation.”

  Still touching the locket, Matt used his other hand to tip up her chin. “Stay safe, Sarah,” he
muttered. His head lowered, and his eyes began to flutter shut. “Please stay safe. For me.”

  She couldn’t help it. Before their lips met, Sarah had already closed her eyes. When his mouth covered hers, Sarah thought her knees would buckle. He kissed her so sweetly she had to hold onto his waist for dear life.

  Too soon, he pulled away. “See you around sometime,” he mumbled as he opened the door and left.

  Sarah stood with her feet frozen to the floor, staring at the back of the closed apartment door.

  Once again, she touched the locket and ran her fingers over the pattern. Her eyes started to burn, and she blinked to keep them from overflowing. Coming from Matt, the locket, such as it was, truly was the most romantic gift she’d ever received. Even though it was only meant to wear to work, she wondered if maybe she’d never take it off.

  She turned around and walked into the bathroom to look at herself in the mirror, wearing the locket.

  The transmitter really was totally concealed and inconspicuous. Just like something out of a James Bond movie.

  And that gave Sarah an idea.

  Thirteen

  Sarah started the car, but she couldn’t drive away. Not yet.

  The pastor’s words echoed through her head, and she couldn’t turn them off.

  She picked up the bulletin, which she’d scribbled full of notes as the pastor talked, and she read what she’d written.

  She wanted to talk to Matt, but he had gotten off work at seven o’clock that morning, if he got off on time. He was going back to work at seven that night, and he needed his sleep. Her next choice would have been Gwen, except she knew Gwen and Lionel were going to Gwen’s mother’s house for lunch.

  Therefore, Sarah did the only other thing she could think of. She turned off the car and stomped back into the church. Going against the flow of the people, she made her way all the way to the front, where the pastor was standing talking to someone. When the other person moved away, Sarah stepped forward.

  “Excuse me, Pastor? Can I ask you something?”

  He smiled. “Certainly.”

  “You said this morning that doing good deeds won’t get you into heaven, but you can’t get into heaven without doing good deeds. I don’t get it.”

  The pastor wrinkled his brow while he thought for a minute. “Good question. Think of it this way. Do you believe in Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior?”

  “I. . .” Sarah let her voice trail off. She’d listened to the pastor talk about believing in Jesus for four weeks in a row. She thought back to the things she’d been taught as a child, when her neighbor used to take her and any of the other neighborhood kids who would go to church. She thought of the things Matt had said about Jesus and how Jesus died so that those who believed would have eternal life. This morning, the pastor had read the very same thing right out of the Bible, which was God’s Word.

  She believed in God, and she believed that what God said in the Bible was true.

  “Yes. I think I do,” she said.

  The pastor crossed his arms and smiled. “If you’re not sure, then think of it this way. If you left for work, and halfway there you thought you left an element on when you were cooking. Would you turn around and be late for work to go home and turn it off?”

  “Well, no. I probably would have thought I was imagining it and hadn’t left it on, so no, I wouldn’t go back.”

  “Then you didn’t really believe you left it on. If you really believed, you would go back, even if it made you late, and your boss docked your pay. It’s the same way when you believe in Jesus as your Lord and Savior. Even bad people do some good deeds, for their own reasons. Are you doing good deeds just because it feels good to do them, or because Jesus wants you to, even if they are hard to do or cost you something? If you do something only because Jesus wants you to, then you really believe.”

  Sarah’s head swam. Matt hadn’t explained it like that.

  “That’s the difference. If you believe in Jesus and love Him, then you will do the good deeds because He wants you to, regardless of the cost. It’s the motivation that makes the difference to God. He also says that when you see something that needs to be done, if you love Jesus, you do it because He is Lord of your life. Talk is cheap. God wants action to prove your faith, because it’s the faith that opens the doors to Heaven.”

  “The Bible says that?”

  “Not in exactly those words, but, yes, it says that.” He reached over to a nearby table, picked up a Bible, and paged through it. “Right here in the book of James. See where it is?”

  A sinking feeling hit Sarah in the stomach. She did believe, but she’d never thought about having to prove it. Did she really believe enough to want to prove it? “I think I had better do some reading. Do you know where I can go to get a Bible?”

  The pastor lost his smile. “I’d give you one, but the Sunday school gave the last one away today. You can get a Bible from the Christian book store a few blocks away.”

  Sarah checked her watch. “Great. I’ll go there.”

  The pastor smiled again. “You’ll have to wait until tomorrow. They’re closed on Sundays.”

  Sarah nodded. “Okay. Then I’ll make a stop on my way home from the university tomorrow. Thanks for your help. I should go now.”

  Sarah drove straight home. She found herself pacing. She really wanted to understand but didn’t want to wait a full twenty-four hours before she could start reading. Not only did Matt own a Bible, but his was also filled with all sorts of nicely written notes that would probably help her understand.

  She looked at the clock. If Matt had to be at the station for his debriefing at 6:30, he probably woke up at 5:45 or sooner. He would probably loan her his Bible for a day until she could buy her own. If she picked it up before he had to go to work, she could dash home and do a little reading before she had to lie down and have a nap to get herself charged and ready for work at midnight.

  Sarah smiled at her own ingenuity. She quickly changed into her pajamas, and set the alarm for 6:00 p.m.

  ❧

  “I’m gone for lunch break, Kristie. Can you watch the front for me?”

  “Sure thing.”

  Sarah nearly ran to the lunchroom. The first thing she did was dig Matt’s Bible out of her purse and open it up to where she had her bookmark. Once settled, she lifted her sandwich, about to take her first bite, and froze. Matt always prayed before he ate. If he were in public, he closed his eyes for just a second and prayed silently. But when in a private place, he took the time to do it properly.

  Sarah laid her sandwich back down on the plate, folded her hands on the table, and closed her eyes.

  Dear God. This is my first time doing this, so I hope I’m doing it right. Thanks for this food and thanks for this job and thanks for Matt, who really is a great guy. Amen.

  Matt.

  With her palm, she pressed the locket to her chest, over her heart. Matt had been utterly shocked when she phoned to ask if she could borrow his Bible. His expression had been priceless when he answered the door. She knew he’d be in a rush to leave for work, so she hadn’t stayed. He’d barely had time to stammer that she could have his Bible as long as she wanted before she ran off with it and drove home.

  As she ate her lunch, she read all the parts that the pastor had talked about, some of them two or three times, until she felt she understood them. Unfortunately, she didn’t have time to read any more before her time was up, and she had to return to work.

  Upon her return to switch off at the counter with Kristie, Kristie’s gaze flitted to the locket.

  Her eyes narrowed as she studied it, then examined the chain. “Did you find your old locket from when you were a kid? That retro look is really in right now, although I personally draw the line at bad jewelry. I guess that locket must be special. Have you got an old picture of your mom and dad in there?”

  “It’s not from my mom and dad. It’s from a friend.” The second the words left Sarah’s mouth, she snapped
her big mouth shut.

  Kristie’s eyes widened. “You mean it’s new? I’m so sorry! I didn’t mean to insult your locket, especially if it was a gift. What kind of friend? A boyfriend?”

  “I. . .” Sarah let her voice trail off. She didn’t want to say it was from Matt, because when he came into the donut shop, he was on duty. She couldn’t tell Kristie not to say anything around Donnie that she was seeing a cop. If Donnie found out, he’d automatically become defensive, and she didn’t want him to try harder to cover up what he was doing. She was actually hoping he’d get sloppy. Suddenly, an idea came to her. She forced herself to laugh, hoping it didn’t sound fake. “Yes, it’s from my new boyfriend, who obviously has questionable taste in jewelry. But I have to wear it, or I’d hurt his feelings.”

  “Is he cute?”

  Matt’s handsome smiling face with his beautiful blue eyes flashed through her mind. Sarah sighed. “Yes, he’s cute.”

  Kristie reached out in the direction of the locket. “Then bad taste is okay. Can I see his picture?”

  In a flash, Sarah covered the locket with her palm to protect it. “I have to get a good picture of him.”

  “Oh, he’s shy, huh? That’s okay. Just make sure and point him out to me if he ever comes in here.”

  “If I remember. I think it’s time for your lunch break now.”

  Kristie had only been gone for fifteen minutes when Matt and another officer came in. She tried to tamp down her smile as they walked up the center aisle toward the counter.

  “Good evening, gentlemen. What will it be tonight? I’ll bet this is. . .” Sarah glanced at Matt. As she did so, she raised her hand and touched the locket. He lowered his eyes for a split second only to acknowledge her movement, then quickly resumed direct eye contact. “. . .a bran muffin and mocha cream night for you, Constable Walker. And for Constable Edwards, a cheese scone and a House-Blend Special.”

  Both officers smiled, Matt more than Constable Edwards. Imagining his smile earlier in no way compared to the real thing, which almost made her knees weak.