Rocky Mountain Mayhem

by Joan Rylen

  Vivian peeked with one eye, then promptly shut it. “It’s too bright.”

  Lucy smacked Wendy on the butt, then yanked her covers off, too. “Up!”

  “I thought we were here to relax,” a sleepy Wendy said. “That’s exactly what I’m doing.”

  Lucy jumped from one bed to the other. “We’ve got big plans today. We work out, then we spa, then we bike ride in Vail, then we fire pit. Come on! Get up up up!”

  “Bike ride?” Wendy moaned, still in bed.

  “Yes! Vail Village reminds me of Switzerland, so picturesque. I’ve already reserved bikes for us today at 5, and I know the perfect place to watch the sunset. I even bought special snackage for the occasion. Then we’ll ride back into town and go to dinner at Hail-Yeah, the only ‘casual’ place in Vail.”

  “When did you go to Switzerland?” Vivian threw a pillow at Lucy.

  “I haven’t, but I’ve seen pictures.”

  “Whatever,” Wendy said and rolled out of bed.

  Vivian thought about the day’s activities, and that spa idea was enough to get her moving. “I’m in for your itinerary,” she said to Lucy, then grabbed her comforter and a box of white powdered donuts and joined Kate on the balcony.

  “Mornin’,” Kate said and took a sip of her coffee. “Breakfast of champions, I see.”

  Vivian popped a whole donut into her mouth. “Roo row rit.” She coughed, and a cloud of powdered sugar floated in the sun’s rays.

  Wendy had poured herself a bowl of cereal and stepped out just in time for the sugar cloud. “You should balance that with a banana at least.”

  Vivian shook her head and licked her fingers. “I think I’ll just balance with another one of these.”

  Lucy and Kate grabbed granola bars for breakfast, then the girls changed into their workout gear.

  Vivian knocked on Nelson’s door and let him know about their workout and spa plans.

  Lucy marched down the hall. “The workout starts now. Forget the elevator, we’re takin’ the stairs down.”

  Kate slumped her shoulders. “That’s eight floors.”

  “Nine, actually. We’re going down to the lowest level. You can do it.” Lucy pushed open the door to the stairwell.

  The girl’s steps echoed as they marched down the nine floors. Their soles squeaked on the turns as Lucy periodically cheered them on.

  Overall, not too bad, but she can forget it if she expects me to go up this way! Vivian thought.

  “Ladies, ladies, ladies!” Lucy chanted as they walked into the gym. She took in all of the equipment and was happy to find everything they needed. “Have I got something fantastic in mind for us today! I’ve been working with a new trainer and I have written up some of my workouts for us to try. It’s a circuit that we will do three times – you may feel like you are going to die, but I assure you, you won’t!”

  Vivian kicked a machine. “I have high blood pressure, remember. Don’t kill me.”

  “You’ll be fine.” Lucy went around the gym setting up the various stations and providing a demonstration on each one. Vivian, Wendy and Kate made faces and sounds at each of the activities. Without missing a beat, Lucy got everyone in position and yelled, “On your mark, get set, go!”

  Moaning and groaning, her reluctant subjects began the workout. Lucy, with her unwavering enthusiasm, refused to allow even the slightest amount of slacking off and ignored the “drill sergeant” and “Trainer McGuire” comments coming out of the girls’ mouths.

  As round one neared completion, Lucy was just getting warmed up. The other girls sounded as if they were injured, or perhaps, dying.

  “So much whining!” she yelled, then tossed them each a towel. Lucy took a quick sip of strawberry-infused water. “If y’all are this worn out after one round, this should be your wake-up call – this is exactly what you should be doing several times a week so you don’t die.”

  Wendy, who was actually the least whiny during round one, got off of her machine and draped her towel around her neck. “I’d like to be able to walk tomorrow, so I’m done.”

  “Come on, Wendy, you can do it. Keep going,” Lucy encouraged.

  “Nope, stick a fork in me. I’ll be in pain as it is, but no need to add insult to injury.”

  Lucy was disappointed, but knew better than to mess with Wendy when she’d made up her mind. She focused her attention to Vivian and Kate, who, after seeing Wendy’s retreat also said they were done.

  “Oh no, no, no,” Lucy said, showing no mercy. “It gets easier. Keep at it.”

  Round two was surprisingly quiet. Lucy assumed that they either needed all of their breath for the workout, or simply didn’t have enough oxygen to make a sound. Either way, she was happy they had cooperated and remained encouraging of their efforts.

  “Last round!” Lucy yelled.

  Vivian and Kate responded in unison. “Thank God!”

  Lucy rolled her eyes and continued to push them through exercises. Vivian and Kate’s form rapidly deteriorated and they did a few less reps despite Lucy’s vigilance, but they managed to complete the workout. At the end of the last set, Vivian and Kate threw themselves on the floor, gasping.

  “I can’t believe you do that almost ever day, Lucy.” Vivian sucked in some air. “I think my lungs are collapsing. Call a medic.”

  “You did great for never working out. If you keep at it, you, too, could have my fine form.” She did a Vanna White sweep up and down her side.

  Kate bent her knees, but otherwise made no move to get up. “I don’t have time to do this on a regular basis.”

  “You have to make time.” She glanced at the floor, then back to the girls. “There’s no telling how many germs you’re rollin around in down there. Y’all should get up.”

  Vivian and Kate stayed put and continued their death rattling.

  Lucy offered them each a hand and helped them up. “Might want to hit the hand sanitizer on the way out.” She pointed to a dispenser, turned and headed toward the door. “You’ve been detoxified of all, well, some of the alcohol you’ve consumed, and this workout is going to make you appreciate your massages all the more.”

  “But I wanted to feel good in my massage,” Kate said. “I hope the pain searing through my body doesn’t interfere.”

  “That’s exactly why I stopped,” Wendy said. “I was thinkin’ ahead.”

  Lucy harrumphed at that.

  “As long as my masseur is cute and has strong hands,” Vivian said as the door to the gym closed behind her, “I’m going to forget about pain and stress and everything else. My relaxation begins now!”

  26

  THE torture of Wonkita’s workout behind them, the girls headed to the locker room to shower before their massages.

  Once clean and comfy, they each claimed a lounger in the ladies lounge.

  Vivian looked over at Lucy. “I notice you avoided the Gravitron during our workout today.”

  Lucy gave her the stink eye.

  “What? I’m just sayin’.”

  “Say nothing.”

  Kate looked at Vivian. “What’s a Gravitron?”

  Vivian glanced at Lucy. “It’s an amazing piece of exercise equipment that, unfortunately, isn’t for the short in stature.”

  Lucy huffed, then walked to the beverage station. “I don’t need to hear this story. Living it was bad enough.”

  Wendy put down her magazine. “This sounds good.”

  “Oh, it is,” Vivian smirked. “We were in college and Gabrielle had free visitors passes to her gym, so the three of us went.

  “Lucy wasn’t the gym connoisseur she is today, and neither of us knew how to work most of the machines. I stuck to the usual equipment, you know, stuff like the rower and the treadmill, but Lucy wanted to try out the Gravitron. It was smack dab in the middle of the gym. It must have been their newest toy, and they were showing that bad boy off.

  “She decided to give it a whirl and stepped on the platform. She was then automatically boosted up to a
bar about eight feet in the air.”

  “Boosted her up?” Wendy interrupted.

  “It had some kind of hydraulic motor or something. I dunno, but it kinda just popped her up there. It was really cool.”

  “Huh.”

  “So Lucy grabbed the bar and pulled herself up to where her chin was just over it. Well, the little booster step then went down, leaving her hanging there.”

  “Oh no.”

  “Oh yes. She hung on for a few seconds, her feet dangling, and started searching frantically for a step, any step. Of course, the platform was long gone and she didn’t know how to make it come back up.”

  “Did you help her?” Kate had a blanket pulled up to her nose and was giggling behind it.

  “I didn’t know what to do, so down she came with a loud thud!” Vivian smacked her hands together. “She was sprawled out, flat on her ass.” She laughed again at the memory.

  “Is this where you helped her?” Kate asked.

  Lucy turned from the beverage station, dunking her tea bag. “No, she never helped me.”

  “It was funny. I did my usual point and laugh, then pretended to not know her. I am ashamed to admit, but then I walked away.”

  “You did not.” Wendy threw her magazine at Vivian, which missed.

  “I did.”

  “It really is amazing she’s still your friend,” Wendy said.

  Lucy grabbed a dried banana chip and threw it at Vivian. “That thing almost killed me!”

  “Oh, you were fine, and it was damn funny!”

  The door to the ladies lounge opened and a tall, thin, middle-aged man wearing a tight black T-shirt and black slacks entered.

  “I’m looking for Vivian,” he said.

  Vivian picked up the dried banana from her lounger, popped it into her mouth and waved. “That’s me!”

  “I’m Stefan. I’ll be providing your massage today.”

  “Excellent,” Vivian said, as he turned back toward the door. She turned to the girls and gave a thumbs up. “See y’all later in the grotto!”

  Stefan led her down the hall to the Snowflake room.

  “Please disrobe to your comfort level, remove any jewelry and lay face down here,” he said as he pulled back the sheet. “Do you have any areas that require special attention?”

  “My lower back sucks since I had the twins, but other than that, the usual. I don’t want any of that deep tissue, stick-your-elbow-in-my-back business, either. I just want to feel good. You know, relax.”

  “I understand completely.” He folded the sheet on the massage table back, smoothing it gently. “The table is warmed and ready. I’ll be back in a few moments to begin.” He stepped out and closed the door behind him.

  Vivian didn’t have on any jewelry or a stitch of clothing, so she placed her robe on the hook on the back of the door and slipped under the sheet. She stuck her face into the oval cutout and wiggled around to get comfortable.

  I bet this will be the best massage ever.

  She closed her eyes and took a deep breath. It smells wonderful in here. I wonder what that is. Juniper? Not piney enough. Juniper mixed with something? She took another deep breath. Lavender? Honey? Heck, I don’t know.

  She turned her attention to the music. Are these chanting monks? The next song began and sounded like wind blowing through trees, caressing a chime from time to time. While she enjoyed it, she’d enjoy it more if her masseur was already at work. What’s takin’ him so long? My time better not have started yet.

  After another couple of minutes, the door opened and shut with a thud.

  The masseur stood over her and cleared his throat loudly, then cracked his knuckles, one by one. Apparently ready, he slid the sheet down to her waist, then poured warmed oil onto her back. He rubbed his hands back and forth across her back, though not with much finesse. He moved from her upper back, to shoulders to neck, then abruptly to her lower back, almost on her butt. Vivian squirmed a little, and he moved back up to the middle of her back.

  As he worked she could feel him close to her. His breath was steady as he glided his hands along her back, running them along her side and occasionally touching the side of her breasts.

  After a few minutes he pulled the sheet up to her shoulders, then flipped it off of her feet and legs. He pushed it high, all the way up to the top of her thighs.

  Don’t they usually do one leg at a time?

  He squirted oil onto her right leg, then began kneading her calf, working his way up.

  I hope he comes back to my feet. That’s one of my favorite parts.

  He went up over her knee, both hands around her thigh, his fingers getting a little closer than professional boundaries dictated.

  This is gettin’ weird. I didn’t take this for a happy ending kind of place.

  She was about to say something when he started on her other calf.

  He has the roughest hands I’ve ever felt for a masseur.

  As he began to work his way up past her knee, she knew she was going to have to say something. His touch had become even more sensual.

  An “mmmmmmmm” escaped his lips as his hand moved up her thigh, moving the sheet and exposing her ass.

  That’s it!

  She sat up and flipped over, grasping at the sheet to cover herself.

  What the…

  27

  HOLY shit what are you doing here?” Vivian yelled.

  He put his hands up in defense. “Take it easy, take it easy.”

  Vivian jumped off the massage table and tugged the sheet around her. “Craig, get the hell out of here.”

  “Vivian, I need to talk to you. Don’t you know how much I love you?”

  “You are a maniac. Get out of here!” She made a break for the door.

  He stepped in front of her and grabbed her arms. “Run away with me. We can be in another country in a matter of hours.” His eyes pleaded, wild and intense. “Grab your things and let’s go.”

  “You are crazy! My kids! I’d never leave them!”

  “We’ll start our own family. Vivian, I love you.” He shook her a little. “We’re meant to be together!”

  “Oh my god! HELP! HELP ME!” she screamed, trying to loosen his grasp.

  Craig shoved her against the wall, covering her mouth with his hand. “Shhh, I have money, Vivian. I can afford anything you want. We can live on a beach somewhere. It’ll be perfect. Just us.”

  Vivian continued to struggle, turned her head away from his hand and screamed again. “HEELLLLLLLLLP!” Her sheet had fallen to the floor, but she didn’t care. All she wanted was to get away.

  The door burst open. “Hands up!” Agent Nelson rushed into the room followed by a security officer. They ran around the table on either side. Nelson reached Craig first and grabbed his left arm, trying to wrap it around his back. Craig twisted and punched him in the face. Nelson hammered Craig with a fist to the nose and another to the gut.

  Craig answered with a double jab to Nelson’s right kidney, who recoiled, dazed.

  “Craig, stop it!” Vivian yelled.

  Craig spun and gave the security officer a right hook that knocked him back into the wall. He slumped to the floor.

  Vivian screamed again. Craig grabbed her arm and ran for the door, dragging her with him.

  Nelson jumped over the table onto Craig’s back, causing the connection between Craig and Vivian to break. Nelson wrapped his arm around Craig’s neck, choking him. Craig twisted and threw an elbow back into Nelson’s face. Crack! Nelson staggered. Craig ran out of the room. Nelson recovered, then got up and charged after him.

  Vivian scooped up the sheet, shielding herself, and ran into the hall. The security officer had recovered and ran out behind her, yelling into his walkie-talkie. “Confirmed assailant, Craig Pearson, Caucasian male, wearing black T-shirt, black pants. Running in spa corridor. Request police backup. Need medical assistance.”

  At the end of the corridor, a masseuse stepped out of a therapy room, right in Craig’s pa
th. He shoved her out of the way. She yelped in pain as she slammed against the wall. Craig flung the exit door open and hauled ass up the stairs into daylight.

  Wendy ran out to see about the ruckus and Nelson smacked right into her, both of them falling to the ground.

  “You okay?” he asked, jumping off of her.

  “I think so,” a startled Wendy answered.

  Nelson took off, back in pursuit.

  Lucy and Kate rushed out of their therapy rooms to Wendy and helped her up.

  Vivian reached them. “Oh my god! Are you okay?”

  “Holy shit! What’s going on? Was that Craig?” Wendy pointed in the direction the men had run. Her face was covered in bright orange goop.

  “Yes,” Vivian said. “Are you bleeding?” She pointed to a red smear on Wendy’s neck.

  Wendy touched the spot and looked at her blood-smeared fingers. “It’s not mine. I think Wade was bleeding.”

  “Where are the police?” Lucy asked the security officer.

  He held up a finger as he listened to the information being relayed. “Subject just ran out west spa stairwell exit. I repeat, subject exited west spa stairwell. Request police backup and medical assistance.”

  Lucy and Kate’s masseurs checked on Wendy’s aesthetician, who was holding her shoulder, whimpering.

  The security officer lowered the walkie-talkie and instructed everyone to go into the ladies lounge. “Stay there. I’ll be back in a few minutes.” He hustled down the hall, toward where Craig had disappeared.

  Wendy fanned her face. “I gotta wash this shit off. It’s starting to burn.”

  Her aesthetician got back into Ridge mode. “Oh yes, I’m so sorry. Let’s get that off you.” Still holding her shoulder, she turned to Kate’s lady. “Please go into my room, get a hot towel and remove her peel. Afterwards, please apply the papaya-infused whipped moisturizer. Liberally.”

  Kate’s masseuse took care of Wendy while the rest of the group went into the lounge and had a seat.

  A bloody-nosed and beat-up Stefan sat in a chair, ice pack to his forehead.