Forget the Yellow Brick Road

by Liz Green

  The Captain listened intently as Dorothy unloaded. Secretly, he was proud of where she found herself, that she was finally allowing herself to acknowledge and feel her truth.

  Just as she finished, Dorothy said, “Is there room on that boat of yours for one more?”

  The Captain chuckled to himself, but with great sincerity replied, “Of course, Dorothy, but remember it is a yacht, not a boat.”

  That afternoon, Dorothy typed up her resignation letter, packed up her desk, and called a taxicab. She walked to the CEO’s office with a handbag on one arm and a box of her belongings on her opposite hip. As she dropped the envelope on his desk, he looked up at her in a perplexed manner. “It’s not hard to guess what is contained in that envelope, especially considering you have a box in your arms,” the CEO said. “Where are you going?”

  Dorothy did not even pause. She strutted toward the elevators and called out over her shoulder, “I’m off in search of my success.”

  When Dorothy arrived home that afternoon, she packed her bags and caught a direct flight to the tropics to join The Captain on his yacht. He was so pleased to see her, and Dorothy could not have been more pleased to see him.

  During the weeks that followed, Dorothy pitched in by working on the yacht but still had plenty of time for relaxation and reflection. The guests who arrived only two days after Dorothy’s arrival were a wonderful family. The couple treated her like a long-lost friend and were great sounding boards and advisers. Dorothy was surprised by how admiring they were of her courage to quit her job and go in search of her true life’s purpose.

  She enjoyed the coming and going of all the guests on The Captain’s yacht. Each of them had a different story to tell, and their successes were varied. She was intrigued but also naturally curious about their journeys and about the moments in which they knew that they had achieved success. The guests were also interested in Dorothy’s story. They even asked her for advice on financial and economic matters. She was honestly surprised by how rewarding it was to share her knowledge with others.

  The most liberating part of her tropics experience was the few days she spent alone with The Captain between guests’ arrivals, and the staff had been dropped ashore for time off. The two of them would wake when they wanted, go where they wanted, eat what they wanted, swim when they wanted, and sleep when they wanted.

  Under strict instruction of The Captain, Dorothy was not spending any time forcing decisions or fretting about what was next for her. She promised him that the only thing she was committing herself to for the time being was spending the winter with him. Her only goal was to tan her legs, hang her feet over the edge of the yacht, and dangle her toes above the crystal-clear blue waters in girly freedom.

  A season later…

  CHAPTER 19

  Attack of the Guilts

  The winter season had passed, and Dorothy and The Captain returned to the city for the summer. When they arrived at the marina, a welcoming party was waiting for them: Trent; Scott Crow and Brian; Tim Woods, with his teenage daughter, Fiona Miller, and their newly adopted daughter; and Catherine Lyons, with her husband and two children. Dorothy had fled the country as soon as she resigned from her job at The Organisation, so there had been no time for anyone to say good-bye. They were all excited to see their beloved friend for the first time since last summer.

  It was almost like old times, but better, Dorothy thought. Each friend had a different story to tell, and all were eager to hear about Dorothy’s decision to quit her job and head off to sea on an adventure.

  Trent had just returned from a mountain-climbing expedition and told them of the life-changing experience he had while standing on a mountain top at sunset. He recalled what his guide had said to him. “Take a look over the horizon. Take a look at the sun setting over those peaks over there,” the guide had told him. “Where are all the people who love and care for you in this world, and what might they be doing right at this very moment as you stand atop one of the highest peaks in the world? Be grateful for all you have, and be grateful for all those who love you and care for you, because, in a heartbeat, things can change. Remember the people you love and thank them for being there. Let them know you care about them, too, and remember that there is nothing in this world more powerful than the love and affection of the people around you. The only way to measure a person’s riches is not by the material possessions he or she may have but by the relationships one maintains. Remember what is important, and focus on it.” Trent was uncharacteristically emotional as he shared this life-changing moment. He finished by shocking the group with his plan to leave his job to start an adventure travel company for troubled

  teens.

  Scott Crow animatedly detailed his successful re—

  election, the trials and tribulations he had faced, and the highs he had experienced. Although he knew he would have the support of the gay community for many of his initiatives, he was proud that the majority of his supporters were from the broader community. He told them about the point in time when he knew he had made the right decision to become a politician in order to make a difference. It was at a regular council meeting. A young woman with her two-year-old child was sitting in the back row, attempting to keep her child quiet and still with little success. During the question-and-answer session, she stood up and approached the microphone.

  “I am a twenty-year-old single mother,” she said, “and I was struggling to get a job because I was unable to complete any additional studies after finishing high school and had never had a job. But recently I attended the free job skills program started at the community centre where they taught me basic computer, customer-service, and interview skills. I just wanted to come here tonight to thank you all personally as I started working in my first job ever on Monday.” The free job skills program was an initiative Scott had passed through the council despite much initial resistance from other council members. At that moment, he knew that leaving his corporate career for one of public service had all been worth it.

  Tim Woods and Fiona Miller had a very different story to tell. They had an incredibly stressful but wonderful experience adopting their baby daughter from overseas. After a year of forms, financial payments, and waiting, the adoption agency sent them a videotape of a newborn baby girl. They both said the moment they saw the baby girl’s eyes looking up at them on that video they knew she was their daughter. Now, five months later, they said it seemed as though she had always been a part of their lives. Fiona explained how much she loved Tim’s biological daughter, but they had always wanted to conceive a child together, unfortunately infertility prevented them from doing so. Fiona always maintained hope that someday they would have a baby together. They named their wonderful healthy baby girl Amy, because it meant “beloved,” just as she truly was.

  Since the night they celebrated Scott’s decision to enter politics, Catherine Lyons had been planning to set up her own learning and development consulting agency. Dorothy was thrilled to hear this news. After finally gaining the support of her husband, registering her business name, designing and printing her business cards, and setting up a home office, it was then only a matter of landing her first client. During the winter, after receiving a referral from a close colleague, Catherine met with a potential client and pitched her services. All the friends listening knew how difficult it would have been for Catherine to pluck up the courage for that meeting, so they were all the more excited to hear that she received the purchase order for the work just one week later. She promptly resigned from her job and began the adventure of self-employment. Catherine said she remembered her first day working from home. Her husband had dropped the kids to school. Dressed in her comfortable tracksuit and slippers, Catherine turned on the computer and began to work. She was worried that the project was only going to last a month, but she received three calls that same day from people within her network who had heard she was now consulting and were eager to meet with her to discuss her services. Catherine then knew she
was finally on her way.

  As Catherine finished telling her story, the friends turned to Dorothy, as though she had more of her story to tell. She had already told them about the disaster of not being offered the CFO position and her joy while sailing through the tropics with The Captain. They knew Dorothy well, however, and knew there was still one piece of the jigsaw missing. Trent asked, as if on behalf of everyone on board the yacht, “What’s next for you, Dorothy?”

  It was now midnight, and everyone had recently left the yacht to go home. Standing on the back deck, Dorothy looked across the water, where the reflection of the moon shone brightly back at her. Not too far off in the distance, the tall city apartments and office buildings, of which one was her own apartment and another the office building she had worked in for so many years of her life, had turned off their lights and gone to bed for the evening. Dorothy reflected on why she was unable to answer her friend Trent’s question. She did not know what was next for her. She knew she needed to find her success, but she was not sure how or even exactly what it was. Perhaps she should go back to the work she knew, go back to working in one of those buildings. Maybe a break was all that she had needed. Finance was all that she knew. What else could there be?

  The Captain was watching Dorothy as she stared up at the city skyline. He had wondered how she would adjust once they returned from the tropics, what she would choose to do with her life and whether or not she would get sucked back into the vortex of the familiar.

  He left Dorothy with her thoughts for a while and then approached her and wrapped his strong arms around her. Her body felt tense, but then she dropped her head back onto his shoulder and relaxed against him.

  “Dorothy,” he said, “you can do or be anything you want to. I will support you in any choices you make.”

  Without thinking, Dorothy exclaimed, “But what about my plan to follow the yellow brick road? That’s all I know.”

  The Captain wisely responded, “The plan you set for yourself when you were twenty is not necessarily the right plan for you today. Dorothy, it is important for you to reevaluate your plan based on your changing needs, wants, and values.”

  “But I would be failing my father,” she said. “I would be letting him down.” She sounded despondent.

  “You know better than that, Dorothy,” The Captain said. “Honestly. Not only is this life yours and not your father’s, but there is only one failure and that is in falling down and not getting back up again.”

  He spun Dorothy around, held her face in his hands, and looked deep into her eyes. “It’s time for you now to let go of your guilt and release yourself from those shackles and find your purpose, define your values, and create for yourself a vision for the future.”

  The following week…

  CHAPTER 20

  The Delicate Art of Change

  It took Dorothy more than a week after her return to muster the courage to go back to her apartment. She suddenly felt so fragile and afraid. The Captain reassured her that everything would turn out fine if she just trusted herself enough to take one step at a time. To move too quickly at this stage may be counterproductive, he said.

  The apartment was exactly how she had left it, just a little dustier. Dorothy was shocked by how claustrophobic she felt in the enclosed rooms and walked straight to the windows to sweep open the heavy curtains. On the coffee table sat the box that contained all the office belongings she brought home the day she resigned. She confidently picked it up and slid it onto the highest shelf of the wardrobe in the third bedroom.

  Reflectively, Dorothy strolled through each room of her apartment. She noticed the contemporary Austrian crystal chandelier that hung dramatically from the centre of the ceiling in the lounge room, above the full leather sofa and chaise. The high-gloss kitchen with shiny stainless-steel appliances and her prized espresso coffee machine. The beautiful remodelled bathroom had natural-stone floor tiles, mosaic wall tiles, and a decadent spa bath. Then she entered the bedroom, which had a king-size bed, and the converted second bedroom, which served as her walk-in robe and dressing room containing her designer clothes, shoes, and bags. The third bedroom was a home office. Dorothy was surprised at her lack of attachment to most of the things that she had accumulated throughout the years.

  On her way to the apartment, Dorothy had picked up the daily newspaper. It had been such a long time since she had read her hometown paper. She grabbed it from her bag, flopped onto the bed, and began aimlessly flicking through the pages.

  An hour later, she woke up, not realising she had fallen asleep. She had rolled onto the paper unknowingly while sleeping. Now, as she rolled back over, one of the pages stuck to her hand. She shook her hand, but the page did not fall off. Peeling away the paper with her other hand, she noticed a job advertisement glaring back at her. The notice was small, and not set in bold type, but, for some reason, it jumped out at her from among the other text, articles, and advertisements on the page.

  Before she lost her nerve, Dorothy picked up the phone and called the number of the recruitment agency. After a lengthy discussion, both the recruiter and Dorothy thought she would be more than qualified for the job.

  Two weeks later, Dorothy had not only moved in with The Captain onto the yacht, she had also leased her apartment, put all her belongings into storage, and started her new job as a financial accountant for a well-respected not-for-profit organisation. The company created the position to fill a six-month paternity leave contract. Dorothy believed this job would be the perfect stopgap until she decided what it was she really wanted to do.

  The office of the not-for-profit organisation was a little run-down, but it was full of life and activity. The people she worked with were passionate and earnest, with a genuine desire to make a difference in the world around them. At first, Dorothy felt like a fraud, as her motive for being there was not in line with that of the others in the office. Over time, however, inspired by the energy and enthusiasm around her, Dorothy was bouncing out of bed in the morning, genuinely excited about getting

  to work.

  During one lunch break, Dorothy was sitting with Cynthia Greggs, the not-for-profit organisation’s CEO. Cynthia was someone Dorothy admired. Cynthia took the role of national CEO four years ago and quickly brought focus and rigour to the not-for-profit organisation, which was previously a loose collection of state-based bodies. Dorothy had learned in her short time working there that, through drive, passion, and dedication, Cynthia had been responsible for ensuring the fledgling charity became unified and flourishing. She successfully developed critical partnerships with businesses and operationally refined processes and systems. Cynthia built cohesion and better communication between the state bodies and developed an important governance model. She also identified four key values for the not-for-profit organisation to focus on: support, research, awareness, and advocacy all of which resulted in the amazing success the not-for-profit organisation had achieved in recent times.

  Dorothy’s curiosity won that day. She asked Cynthia, “Do you aspire to anything more than this?”

  When Cynthia looked back at her in confusion, Dorothy continued, “You know, do you aspire to being a CEO of a for-profit organisation?”

  Dorothy had seen the same look on Cynthia’s face before, however, on the face of another whom she could not quite place quickly enough before Cynthia replied, “Dorothy, this would have to be the most rewarding job I have ever had,” Cynthia said. “Sure, I might not get paid what other CEOs get paid, but in this job, I get to make a difference in others’ lives and go to sleep at night with satisfaction and a clear conscience.”

  The Captain had noticed quite a shift in Dorothy since she began working with the not-for-profit organisation. He was quietly confident that the lessons Dorothy was learning and the change she was undertaking were going to be good for her good for both of them. Little did he realise, however, the enormous change that lay around the corner for both of them.

  The end of summer appr
oached, and soon it would be time for The Captain to leave again. Neither of them had raised the issue as they both hoped that if they did not talk about it, they might not ever have to deal with it. One Saturday afternoon, The Captain returned to the yacht to find Dorothy lying sick in bed. She had been complaining for more than a week of feeling unwell, but she had not been sick enough to warrant spending a beautiful day in bed. That was until now.

  “Dorothy, are you OK?” The Captain consoled.

  “I think so,” Dorothy answered, unconvincingly.

  “What do you think might be wrong?” he asked.

  Dorothy looked up at The Captain and saw that he was clearly terribly worried about her. She had been to the doctor earlier that week, and he had seemed quite concerned and taken blood to run a series of tests. When Dorothy had called to retrieve the results over the phone, she was asked to return to the surgery to meet with the doctor in person. This request did little to put her anxiety to rest. She returned to the doctor that Saturday morning, feeling the most ill and weak she had ever felt, to receive the results. His words were still reverberating in her head.

  Dorothy sat up in bed and took The Captain’s hands in hers. Her heart was beating loudly in her chest, and she wondered if she would even be able to say the words aloud. Closing her eyes, she took a deep breath, opened her eyes, and gulped. “I’m pregnant,” she said.

  The Captain’s expression froze. She was not expecting jubilation, but she sure was hoping for some words of encouragement or support. After politely excusing himself, he left her in the stateroom all alone. She watched as he walked down the hall and up the stairs to the saloon. They had not talked about having children; in fact, they had not even talked about marriage. Dorothy was terrified that she was going to be left to do it all on her own. She imagined the worst. She was sure that The Captain was out on deck, pacing back and forth and gasping with shock.