by Simone Elise
I ran a hand through my hair.
“Chloe, you listening?”
Glancing up at Dan, I saw him frowning at me.
“Sorry, I was thinking,” I replied before shrugging my shoulders “What do you want to do?”
Dan glanced at the lit-up TV with the Xbox logo and then back at me.
“You can play if you want, Dan.” I smiled at him. “I don’t mind watching.”
Dan laughed and then pushed me slightly backwards. “Whatever, Chloe, like I am going to play the Xbox when you are here.”
“You have before,” I pointed out and fell on my back. “I don’t really mind.”
“Why don’t we go for a run?” Dan offered. I turned on my side and glanced out at the night sky.
“It’s a school night though,” I muttered. But the night sky looked so appealing.
“I can’t believe you just said that, Cho.” Dan got to his feet. “Come on, we haven’t run together in forever!”
“It hasn’t been forever.” I frowned sideways at him. “But it does sound like a wicked idea.” I grinned as I leapt up and planted my feet on the floor.
“Though my awesome wolf abilities will kills yours, like always,” I teased and walked towards his door with him trailing slightly behind.
“Whatever, Cho.” I opened the door.
“Where are you guys going?”
We both glanced at Alec as he stood casually in his doorway, across the hall from us.
“What are you doing? Just hanging outside your room waiting for us to come out?” Dan shot at him before closing his door. “Figures. You were always a freak.
Alec rolled his eyes and crossed his arms. “Whatever. Get lost.”
“Planning on it,” Dan threw at him as he walked to the staircase. “Coming, Chloe?” he asked me.
I was still paused by the door looking at Alec. Perhaps he was bored?
“Do you want to come?” I asked Alec. “We are going for a night run.”
Alec narrowed his eyes at me. But before he could say, anything Dan spoke up.
“He’s not invited, Chloe.”
I rolled my eyes at Dan. “Don’t be rude.”
“No. I don’t want to come.” Alex huffed. “Like I would want to hang out with you two.”
“Fine. Whatever. I offered,” I shot back at him. I really didn’t like his tone.
“Night, Ace,” I threw over my shoulder and skipped down the stairs behind Dan. When he reached the bottom step, I launched myself onto his back.
He took a moment to adjust to my weight. But once he got his balance, he placed his hands on my legs as they wrapped around his torso.
“Mom, Dad, Chloe and I are going for a run,” Dan sung in no particular direction. We both knew they would hear us wherever they were in the house.
“Ok. Have fun!” His mom’s voice floated from the kitchen.
See, these were the positives of being a werewolf. Going for a night run wasn’t frowned upon. In fact your parents encouraged it. Though sometimes they would pipe up and say something if it was a school night. Well, my parents would. But not Alice and Brett. They were awesome like that.
“So where do you want to run?” Dan asked as I lowered myself off his back and stood on his front porch.
“Back into the town? We could do a few laps, run along the forest line?” I offered.
“Sounds thrilling.” Dan grinned. Nodding my head we walked to the tree line.
“Hey, Chloe?”
“Yeah, Dan?”
“Your mate, do you still speak to him?”
I picked up my pace and kept my eyes on the trees we were nearing.
“Yeah, sometimes.” I muttered. “So, you ready?”
I began to undo the cord of my shorts and walked behind a tree, slightly out of his view, as I ripped my clothes off.
Dan didn’t bring it up again. Nor did he ask why I changed the subject so quickly. Arching my back, I transformed into my little grey wolf. Dan’s large tan wolf had his back to me, his tail flicking.
I pushed his side as I sprinted off, and he chased after me.
Grinning my wolf grin, I lowered my head and the trees began to blur as our speed picked up.
***
Puffing, I feel to my stomach in the forest line, near a park. I was wrecked, had it, completely worn out. Whatever line meant I was stuffed. Yeah, insert that.
I could hear Dan’s laughter rumbling around my mind’s walls. He nudged his head into my side and wagged his tail.
“I’m dying,” I huffed into his mind and a small howl of laughter left his large mouth.
“What was that?”
Dan’s body dropped to the ground next to mine and we remained hidden in the forest shadows, listening to the human’s voice.
Dan and I now both took in the family playing in the park under the glow of the streetlights.
If I were in human form, I would hit my forehead. If I were in human form, I would curse nonstop. Because this wasn’t just any human family. No. It was Xavier’s family.
Dan’s eyes snapped to mine full of surprise. “That’s Mr. Clark.” His voice floated in my mind and I nodded my head.
The boys were kicking the ball to each other, while Xavier was walking hand in hand with Emily. Both were smiling at their children. Who took night strolls?
There he was, holding her hand, laughing with her, walking in the fresh night air with their children. When they came to a stop, Emily turned around and stood on her toes to kiss him. I watched Xavier pull her tighter into his chest.
I didn’t need to see this. I couldn’t see this. It was like acid being washed through my body. It hurt. It made me physically sick to watch.
I began to edge backwards, sliding my body away from them. My wolf wanted her dead. I could charge at them and hit her, take her down in one bite. Kill. That was all I needed to do. Abruptly, I flung my body around and took off into the forest. I heard Dan quickly do the same, not understanding my sudden need to get away from them.
I lowered my head and kept charging forward. My tiredness now gone, all of a sudden my body found a new wave of energy; or perhaps we all find the needed strength when we need to run from something.
***
“Chloe, slow down!” Dan shouted in my mind. But his house was coming into view and I didn’t stop. Even though my body was aching, I ignored the pain that shot up my legs as I kept pushing myself.
Finally, I leapt into the air and transformed back to two legs, landing on the dirt in human form and naked. I scooped up my clothes, not even caring I had just given Dan a full show.
Xavier wanted her over me. What did she have that I didn’t? What could she give that I couldn’t? I could love him harder. I could give him an endless life of love.
I pulled the top over my head and slipped my shorts on, not even bothering to find my underwear. I was covered. That was all that mattered.
“Chloe, what the hell is wrong?” Dan roared and grabbed my upper arm, bringing me to a stop.
My chest was heaving as I stood still for the first time in what felt like hours. I knew my eyes were covered with hate and anger.
“Nothing. Nothing is wrong,” I snapped back. I tried to pull my arm out of his grasp but failed, as he just tightened his grip and kept his eyes locked on mine.
“Don’t lie to me.” His face was stern and sweat dripped from his forehead. If he was sweating, I was sure my face was plastered with it; red, hot and sweaty I would be.
“It’s Xavier,” I replied dryly.
“Mr. Clark? What about him?”
“He’s my…” Pain crossed my face as I said it, “my mate.”
Dan’s face twisted in shock before going blank. “He’s your mate.”
“Yes.” My expression dried of aggression. “And he doesn’t want me. He already has someone.”
Self-pity, pain and sadness filled my stomach as I said those words out loud.
Dan stood there frozen, staring at me. I pulled my arm from his grasp now with ease and walked off in the direction of his house.
Had I made a mistake telling Dan about Xavier? If I had, I guess I would just add it to the list of my mistakes, which was becoming endless.
Chapter 10
I stepped out of his bathroom dressed and freshly showered. Dan sat on the end of his bed. I noticed his fresh change of clothes. He locked eyes with me as soon as I opened the door.
I stood there, letting his eyes search mine. He was looking for something and I wasn’t sure what it was. The hot water had erased the burn from my muscles. Now they only ached.
“The woman he was with tonight. Is that the one he chose over you?”
Dan’s voice was rough as he spoke. A lot of other people wouldn’t bring it up. They would wait for me to mention it first. But Dan knew me, and he knew that if he didn’t push me to open up, I wouldn’t. I had told him the foundations. Now he would push me to tell him the rest.
“Yes.” My voice was dull as I walked to the couch and sat, crossing my legs under me, letting my eyes float back to his. “She’s human.”
I let out a soft sigh and continued to explain. “He already has a family. Those two children that were with them are his. Well, theirs.” I shook my head. It hit me harder saying it out loud. “He loves her. He wants a human over me. How twisted is that?”
Dan’s expression remained blank as he watched me. He knew I was strong person. I didn’t put my emotions out on display.
“So he denied you then?” Dan pressed for more information. But he already knew Xavier denied me. That little was no secret to anyone. Everyone knew my mate had denied me. They just didn’t know why or who it was.
“Yes, on my birthday.” I shook my head as I remembered the pain. “I didn’t know why though. I only found that out recently.”
“Who knows?” Dan asked and arched both eyebrows “About him? Who else knows?”
“My parents, Chad and the elders. That’s it. The elders and dad thought it in my best interest and Xavier’s to keep it secret.”
Dan looked glumly at me for a moment. He saw the pain that flashed through my eyes as I mentioned his name.
“So you guys would be in the middle of the separation?” His lips twisted up slightly and his face was full of pity. My reaction caught him off guard.
“No.” I shook my head and curled my fingers into fists. “We were meant to, but he changed his mind, and I fought it for so long.”
“What do you mean?” Dan frowned at me and pushed himself up from the edge of the bed and came to sit next to me on the couch. “So he wants you then?”
“No.” My voice cracked and I knew the tears weren’t far off. “He doesn’t know what he wants. He loves her, but he doesn’t want me to separate from him either.”
“So he wants you to just wait for him to make his mind up?” I heard Dan’s disgust.
“Yes. He wants her, but he wants me too.”
“He can’t drag you along like that!” Dan spat. “What sort of man puts his mate through that kind of rejection and pain?”
I shrugged my shoulders and let my eyes drift to my lap as I unclenched my hands. “I think he wants me to wait in the corner, until he can’t have her anymore.”
“Oh, Chloe.” Dan’s voice was full of pity and his large hand gently reached out for mine.
“I am trying to move on from him. I am trying to go through with the separation. Like he wanted before, that I fought him on. Now that I’ve realized we had to do it, that I have to let him go, he won’t let me.”
Dan wrapped an arm around my shoulder and pulled me closer into his side. “So you are stuck in limbo,” he muttered dryly.
“He doesn’t want me, but doesn’t not want me,” I spoke into his chest. “And every time I see him with her or I’m near him, it hurts.”
Dan rubbed his hand up and down my arm. I let my head fall onto his shoulder, my wet hair sinking into his shirt. My grip on his hand tightened as I held onto him for dear life. I felt like I was about to crumble into pieces and he was the only one holding me together.
“What do your parents think?” he said softly. “What do they suggest you do?”
“I haven’t told them about his decision not to separate,” I muttered. “But my mom is encouraging me to see humans.”
“So that’s why you are seeing that human guy,” Dan said softly.
“Yeah, Cole’s a great guy though,” I said. “But it doesn’t help when I take one step away from Xavier and he pulls me back two.”
“So that’s why he went to your parents about you going away with me.” Dan shook his head. “That explains a lot.”
“Yeah, that’s what sparked his sudden interest in my schooling.” I unclenched my hand from his and trailed my finger over his palm. “He sees you as a threat.”
“So he should,” Dan huffed “Can I ask you something?”
I nodded my head.
“Did you sleep with me to make him jealous?”
I looked him dead in the eye.
“No.” My voice was firm “I wanted to move on from him. I didn’t even think of him finding out until Scott mentioned it.”
Dan’s body seemed to relax a bit and his face softened. Did he think I was using him as chess piece? Did he think I was using him to make Xavier jealous?
“I didn’t do it to make him jealous. Actually I have been doing everything possible lately to decrease his jealously. Which is why I try to not touch you in front of him, though that was blown out of the water when you kissed me at the sports day.”
Dan looked guiltily at me. “Sorry, I just didn’t want that human guy to think you were all his or something.”
“I don’t want to be anyone’s anymore,” I said, turning my head to lean on his shoulder again. “All love does is hurt me. Feelings are overrated.”
Dan brought his hand from my arm and ran it through my wet hair. I closed my eyes and took comfort in his touch.
“I don’t know what to do anymore,” I said softly. “He won’t let me transfer from his class. He has this control over me and, as much as I think I can pull away from him, he can pull me back in with one tug.”
“I know now, so you don’t have to do it all on your own anymore,” Dan said and kissed my forehead. “And I won’t let him hurt you anymore.”
“Dan, I didn’t want you to get involved in this mess. You don’t have to.”
“But I am. Any guy who is hurting you like this, Chloe, needs to be stopped.”
Pulling my head up from his shoulder, I twisted around to face him. “And how do you suggest I stop him? He has full control over my emotions.”
“Well first off.” Dan shifted his weight on the couch and brought his hand from my hair to wrap it around my waist. “You are coming away with me next week.”
“I can’t. Xavier has scared my parents.” I shook my head, knowing it was hopeless. “They said I have to study and get my grades up.”
“Well, we will do that while we are away. The whole trip it can be our focus.”
I looked at Dan blankly. “No way am I letting you waste your vacation studying with me.”
Dan’s lips twitched up slightly. “I am not leaving you here now, not knowing why you can’t come. It will be fine. I will get my parents to suggest the idea to yours and we can rope Alec into helping. He doesn’t like me too much, but he has a soft spot for you.”
“Is Ace even capable of school work?” I frowned. “He doesn’t really come across as a book smart sort of person.” In fact all the memories I had of Alec involved mucking around or fighting.
“He keeps it hidden well.” Dan smiled and pulled me slightly closer to him. “He’s actually smarter than me, but don’t say I said that.”
For the first time my gloom and doom started to melt and a smile crossed my lips.
“I don’t want you guys to waste your vac
ation though, and I’m not sure my parents would go for it.”
“Come on, Cho. My dad is a professor at a university. My parents and your parents are damn close. I am sure they will listen to them.”
I bit my bottom lip. Dan had a point. My parents would likely listen to his. But guilt began to build inside me as I thought about making Dan study with me for the whole vacation.
“I’m really behind though, Dan. Like really, really behind,” I spoke grimly.
Before I knew what happened, I was on my back and Dan was hovering over me. The smirk on his face made me smile.
“You doubting my skills, Chloe?” He arched an eyebrow. “Because I would be really disappointed in you.”
I placed both hands on his shoulders. “Fine, we will give it a try.”
“Good.” Dan grinned and I saw his eyes move to my lips. Without even thinking about it, I leaned up and softly pressed my lips against his sweet mouth.
I let my head fall back onto the couch. His eyes were soft when I looked into them.
Perhaps the best thing I ever did was telling him.
Chapter 11
Xavier
Emily was sleeping peacefully at my side. I slowly pulled my arm out from under her head. Softly and quietly, I placed my feet on the cold fallboards.
Cracking open our bedroom door, I slid through it quietly and then made my way down the corridor. Heading to the laundry room, reaching up to the top of the dryer, I pulled down the clean clothes I kept up there.
Sliding them on, I reached for the spare set of keys I also kept on the dryer. Grabbing my shoes, I cracked open the back door and slid through it. Just like every night. I walked out in the fresh air.
Instead of using the central locking system on my car, I twisted the key in the door. I am accustomed to the little sleep. Most nights I get between three to four hours, but it’s worth it.
Every night I lay in bed with Emily, waiting for her to drift off to sleep and when she does, I wait another hour for her to enter a deep sleep. Then I leave.
Reversing out the driveway, I let the car roll backwards. On the road I crept for a while until I reached my neighbor’s house and that was when I put my foot down.