3rd World Products, Inc., Book 5

by Ed Howdershelt

  She chuckled. "Okay."

  At the parking lot, I made a field pedestal that looked about high enough, said, "Glider on," and floated across the parade field to the hospital's helipad entrance. A sign in the corridor pointed me to Admissions and I jogged up the ramp, arriving just as Barnes walked in from the parking lot.

  In the office, I stepped over to the coffee pot and said, "Three suit off," then tossed Barnes a sloppy salute. He stopped cold and stared at me.

  As I pulled a foam cup off a stack, Danvers asked, "What's wrong?" then she saw me. "What are you doing here?"

  Holding up the cup, I said, "Getting a coffee."

  "Where's... uh, Sue?"

  "'Uh, Sue' is currently guarding your laptop from Markland."

  Marching up to within a few inches of me, she glaringly hissed, "Your computer has my computer?"

  "No, she doesn't 'have' it, Danvers. She's just guarding it, and you need to come up with a way to find out whether the NIA already has everything that was in it the last time Markland messed with it."

  "You're telling me someone's been using my laptop?"

  "Not 'someone'. Markland. He was in your BOQ room."

  Her anger was almost tangible as she shot back, "How the hell would you know...?"

  I turned around and filled the coffee cup as I keyed up a field screen. Danvers gasped and stepped back from it. Barnes gasped and stepped forward to try to touch it.

  When the cup was full, I poked the flapping lips icon and sent a cooling field into my coffee during the brief wait.

  Linda's face appeared and she asked, "Yes, Ed?"

  "Hi, Fearless Leader. Here's the skinny; Cole Markland is NIA and he's had his grubby little hands on Lena's laptop, which he used to tip the Army captain now staring at your lovely face to stop Sue and me in downtown Landstuhl for a passport check."

  "Interesting," she said, her left eyebrow arching.

  To Barnes, I said, "Show her the printout, Cap. She's my boss." Thumbing at Danvers, I added, "She'll probably want to see it, too. She's the real persnickety type."

  As Barnes unfolded the paper, Linda said, "We'll dig a little at this end, Ed. We knew Markland was NIA; they didn't bother keeping it a secret. On the other hand, they told us their only interest was in debriefing the hostages, which wouldn't include tampering with a 3rd World employee's computer."

  Barnes held the paper smack in front of the screen and asked, "Can you see this okay?"

  I reached to pull his display back a foot or so and Linda said, "That's fine now. Got a copy." Her eyes flicked to the front of Barnes' jacket. "Captain Barnes, I'm Linda Baines, head of security for 3rd World. Your insignia tells me you're an MP."

  "Yes, ma'am."

  "For the record, do you confirm receiving this message?"

  "Yes, ma'am. It came as an instant message from Danvers, then Markland called to say he'd be handling the matter."

  "A message from my computer?!" Danvers asked in a disbelieving tone, "Not likely, Ms. Baines. I use 128-bit encryption on everything."

  "Danvers," said Linda, "You're admin, not field. Ed could show you how to bypass your entry codes and use your machine in about ten minutes, and I've no doubt at all that Markland could do the same."

  "Gee, thanks, lady," I said. "Now I can't feel special anymore. By the way, my main reason for calling was to see if you'd tell Danvers that I think she's an officious pain in the ass and an obstacle to progress. She doesn't seem to hear very well past all the brass in her ears."

  "Ah. I thought it might be something like that. Danvers, you're admin. He's field. When you're in the field, the field op calls the shots and you either accept that or you don't get another out-of-office assignment."

  Sue pinged my implant as Linda finished speaking. Putting a finger to my temple to let Linda know something was up, I answered, "Yes, milady," which spared Danvers the immediate need to respond to Linda's words. Barnes and Danvers looked at me oddly. Linda simply waited.

  "Ed," said Sue, "Markland's in the BOQ building and heading toward Danvers' room."

  "Thanks, Sue." Turning to Barnes, I said, "Markland's on his way to Danvers' room. Even if you catch him in the act, you probably won't be able to keep him long, but it's probably worth the effort in other ways."

  Barnes looked at Danvers and said, "Just tell me he's not supposed to be in your room."

  "What?! Go, damn it! Stop him!"

  Looking at Linda and me, Barnes grinningly said, "I'll take that as a 'yes'," and took a small radio out of a belt holster. He told whoever answered to run over to the BOQ and arrest Markland, then put his radio away.

  Linda asked, "Anything else, Ed?"

  "Maybe later. Doubt it, though. Markland won't know any more than absolutely necessary and there's nobody else to question just now. Looks as if you get to do all the digging."

  Nodding, she said, "Okay. Captain Barnes, it was nice meeting you and thanks for your assistance. Goodbye, all."

  She poked her 'off' icon and I dissolved the field screen. Passing his hand through the space where it had been, Barnes asked, "Where'd it go?"

  "Nowhere. It was made of energy. Now the energy's free for other uses."

  "I don't think I understand how... Energy doesn't just stand still, does it?"

  Shrugging, I said, "I just use the the fancy toys."

  Turning to Danvers, he asked, "Do you use them, too?"

  Danvers glanced at me before answering, then said, "In our offices, yes. To a degree. Nothing quite like that."

  "You can't use them outside your offices?"

  Shaking her head, she said, "No."

  "But he can. Why's that?"

  Looking at me as she spoke, Danvers said, "I don't know."

  As Barnes looked at me, I said, "And I can't say. How long can you guys hang onto Markland?"

  "Probably no longer than it takes for him to call his boss. They'll slap 'national security' on it and we'll be out of the picture as soon as they come for him."

  "Come for him?" asked Danvers, "You won't just let him go when they tell you?"

  Barnes grinned. "If we catch him in your room, it's breaking and entering and maybe burglary, depending on what's in his hands or his pockets at the time. Someone will have to appear in person to sign him out of our hands. A report will be filed instantly, and because he's a civilian government employee, copies will go to several agencies. The charges will either have to be dropped, proven false, or reasons for a security cover will have to be given. Are you going to drop charges?"

  "Hell, no!" snapped Danvers.

  "Maybe," I said. "Depends on whether Linda needs leverage with the NIA or not." Looking at Danvers, I added, "But don't worry, she won't tell you to drop the charges unless she's made a pretty good deal."

  Nodding, Barnes said, "Seen it before. Interagency relations can be a real hoot, can't they? What'll you do now?"

  Sipping my coffee, I said, "Head home."

  Danvers looked incredulous. "What?! After all that's just happened?"

  "My job was to unsnatch the hostages and drop 'em here. Markland's your problem."

  Barnes' gaze at me narrowed. "You got them out?"

  "Yeah. Sue and I and two others who'd probably prefer to be nameless. We did a little damage, so there'll probably be something about it on the news."

  Tossing my coffee cup in the trash, I said to Danvers, "So Markland's all yours, ma'am. Work his ass over on general principles. And try to be a little nicer to the next field guy who drops in. We're very sensitive, y'know."

  Holding my hand out to Barnes, I said, "Next time I'm in the area, I'll try to have a stamp in my passport."

  He laughingly shook hands and replied, "Yeah, sure. You do that. Don't make me come after you again."

  Chapter Eleven

  As the three of us headed for the helipad entrance, Sue popped into existence beside me and said, "Markland is in custody and I've taken the liberty of calling the flitter down."

  "Thanks, milady. We..."<
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  Barnes had gasped and stopped walking. Danvers had screeched softly as she'd backed away a couple of steps.

  Rather than cobble up yet another half-assed explanation for a strange occurrence, I just continued walking, took Sue's arm as I whispered, "Three suit on," and stopped us to one side of the sliding glass doors.

  Sue followed 'suit', so to speak, then she asked through my implant, "Why are we invisible, Ed?"

  "We'll be able to leave in peace. Let them get the doors."

  Danvers and Barnes rushed to the spot where we'd disappeared, looked around, then looked through the glass doors to see if we were outside and headed toward them.

  The doors opened for them and we followed them outside. As the doors closed behind us, we walked around Danvers and Barnes toward the helipad.

  Sue asked, "Where are we going now?"

  "Away from the the shrieky woman, mostly. I'm going to crack a beer, put my seat back, and maybe watch the news."

  I couldn't see the flitter, but my implant tingled as it landed in front of us. When we entered the flitter's field, it became visible. We stepped aboard as Sue spoke.

  Sue appeared and said, "Her voice shouldn't have sounded shrieky to you, Ed."

  "It didn't, after you tuned my implant. I was referring to her personality. Three suit off. Flitter, take us up to a hundred feet and park us over the theater building for now."

  "Yes, sir," said the flitter, moving us as directed.

  Grabbing a beer from the cooler, I plunked myself into the pilot's seat and put my feet on the console. Sue took the seat on my right.

  Several moments of silence followed as I opened my beer, sipped it, and remembered another time of my life as I studied the base from end to end.

  Faces flashed across the screen of my mind. Most of them were still attached to names, although not all. Some were simply attached to events or places.

  Too much time and too many changes. It just wasn't the same place at all. Might as well plan some time to make a real tour of the new Europe that had replaced mine.

  "Flitter," I said softly, "Fly us to Landstuhl castle, please. Hover a hundred feet above it."

  "Yes, sir."

  Glancing at the console, I said, "Stop saying that, flitter. If I want confirmation, I'll ask for it."

  The flitter remained silent as the hospital complex receded behind us and we headed for the dark stone walls of hillside-neighbor Schloss Landstuhl.

  Fresh stone and lighter-colored mortar stood out along three of the walls and turrets; it looked as if they'd made considerable -- if not terribly rapid -- progress with restoration.

  I rose to walk to the side of the flitter and stood looking over the hills around us, taking another hit of beer as I focused on one hillside in particular.

  There were multi-level apartments where I'd made a hard, short run and launched a hang glider for the very first time back in 1972. At the bottom of the hill was a gas station and some kind of store.

  "Fuck growth and progress," I muttered. "Flitter, take us back to my house."

  We rose quickly into the sky as I took another sip of beer and added my usual, "Please," as something of an afterthought.

  Turning to Sue, I emphasized the word 'you' as I said, "Quiz time. Why do you think Markland had Barnes stop us?"

  She instantly responded, "He knew we had no entry stamps and expected us to be detained."

  "More, please. Detained on base overnight, then shipped to the embassy. Why? To what gain for whom?"

  "Information for his agency, I suppose."

  "That's where it ends for me at the moment, too. The NIA can't be ignorant about who we are. They'd also have to know about PFM's and Steph's plans to market them; that much is public knowledge since the Orlando glider meet. What else would they want to know badly enough to hijack us and risk having Linda put her boot up their collective asses?"

  Sue snickered. When I looked at her, she said, "People have created some very expressive phrases. I've scanned numerous recent NIA records, but I haven't discovered anything that would appear either to be an answer or lead us to one."

  "For something like what Markland did, there likely won't be any records. He may even have improvised the stop."

  I sipped some more beer and watched the world roll by far below us for a time, then said, "Y'know, Sue, the 'spy vs. spy' crap used to be kind of fun back when I was twenty-something and new at it. The FBI, CIA, DEA, DIA, NSA and all the other acronym-outfits had to literally be forced to share info with each other, so conning each other out of info was as big a game as snookering the Commies."

  Sue smiled at me, but made no response.

  Sipping again, I said, "Now terrorism is the new bugaboo and we've got the goddamned Patriot Act -- a truly misnamed document if ever there was one -- and because of it, they've created another half-dozen or so domestic and international espionage agencies who duplicate each other's efforts because they all still have to be forced to cooperate with each other."

  Draining my beer, I tossed the bottle over the side to bright oblivion and said, "Seems to me that if we truly have a government 'of the people, by the people, and for the people', then the 'people' it's representing at the moment would have to be as conniving, greedy, and paranoid as the Commie witchhunters of the McCarthy era, back in the fifties."

  The console came on and a car commercial ended, then a very attractive woman with an 'all news, all the time' network said, "And now our top stories," and was replaced by footage of the ex-hostages stepping off the flitter at the Landstuhl.

  I tuned out the commentary and watched Barbara and the others meet and greet for a few moments. The image changed to a satellite view of the bunker mountain and the newswoman described it as the place where the hostages had been held as well as a suspected terrorism headquarters.

  A few seconds after she stopped talking, the mountain vented steam and a geyser erupted. Once the top of the column of steam had flattened out enough to obscure the area below, the scene switched to a camera view from one of the surrounding mountainsides as the woman credited the footage to some news outfit that had a crew in Iran.

  We watched the mountain blow up again and the cute newswoman was about to say more, but I tapped the selector icon to bring up 'Stargate:SG1' and looked at Sue as the program's intro faded to commercials.

  "Was turning on the console an attempt to change the subject, ma'am?"

  Shrugging lightly, she said, "I was actually trying to improve your mood. I thought seeing what we accomplished today might do that."

  "It did," I said with a nod and a grin, "I have the attention span of a laboratory rat, y'know."

  Sue returned my grin and put her feet up on the console beside mine. It was impossible not to admire her gorgeous, field-generated legs, so I didn't even try.

  "Oh, I wouldn't say that," she said thoughtfully, "I think your attention span may be somewhat better than that. Most of the time, anyway."

  "Gee, thanks. If I put together a tour of Europe, do you think you can find the time to come with me?"

  Laughing softly, she said, "Well, I'm pretty busy these days, but I might be available. Are you sure you wouldn't rather have Selena and Toni for company on such a tour?"

  "I'd like them to come, but Sel would have to steal time from her new job and Toni's about to start her last semester of college. Got my doubts they'd be able to make the trip."

  "Are you going to ask them anyway?"

  I gave her an 'are you nuts?' look.

  Her questioning expression continued unabated.

  "All right," I said, "Let's say I'll ask them if I don't think it would hurt their feelings to have to say no. Otherwise, I'll tell Linda to make it look like a mission and nobody's feelings will be hurt." Shrugging, I added, "That's if I decide to go. I'm having a little trouble giving a damn at the moment."

  'Stargate:SG1' came back on. The pretty blonde major on the console screen slammed her hand on a big red alert button and declared an unauthorized
incoming transmission as klaxons sounded and red lights flashed. Someone else shouted that they couldn't close the iris or shut down the stargate.

  Hm. Just like 'Star Trek' in that regard; the minute they were needed, defensive systems were very often discovered to be inoperative or inadequate.

  Sue asked, "Because things seemed different?"

  "No, not that so much. Once upon a time -- when I was fifteen or so -- visiting Munich, Paris, or London was just a daydream. By the time I was nineteen, I'd discovered that if you join the right government agency and carefully engineer your way through the maze of possible assignments, you can go just about anywhere you want in the world. So I went."

  Looking at me in silence, Sue simply raised an eyebrow.

  On the screen, guards scrambled to aim M-16's at the big circle as it flushed sideways. Hm, again. After all the times it had taken heavy automatic fire to slow or stop the show's bad guys, the good guys still carried those pissy little M-16's.

  Given that an unauthorized visitor could operate a stargate at all and would feel confident enough to drop in unannounced, I'd have parked a well-entrenched 20mm autocannon at the foot of that ramp and had a couple of LAWs on each side.

  I continued, "I saw the castles, rivers, and mountains. Tried the beers, wines, and foods. Watched the changing of the guard in London and a few other places that do that sort of thing. More or less learned a few key languages and used them for over a decade on four continents. When I looked at the castle this evening, it occurred to me that I'd already seen just about everything that wouldn't change much, so I'm beginning to think a tour isn't really the answer."

  A confident, good looking woman came through the stargate and showed a lot of leg as she coolly scanned the greeting party. A portly one-star general told everybody to stand down and greeted her as an old friend and ally, then she explained why she'd come from somplace other than her usual planet.

  Hm, a third time. No serious effort at caution, even after all the times someone had been duplicated, cloned, infected somehow, taken over by some alien mentality, or had turned out to be working for the bad guys, after all.