Jake's child

by Lindsay Longford

  4 'Just so long as I keep her happy." Walt patted his gray hair. "Snow on the mountain, fire inside!"

  Sarah rolled her eyes.

  4 'Believe me, she loves every minute of it!" Walt hugged Sarah. Sixtyish and burly, he reminded her of her dad, who had died while she was in college. 44 See you around, gorgeous. Charlie, let's go." Walt handed her a folded wad of money.

  4 Too much, you only fished one time." Sarah handed him back three twenties.

  44 Keep it, doll. It was worth it just to see your pretty face. Anyway, we wouldn't ever get fish if it weren't for you." Walt shoved the money back in her fist. 4 'What's a rich, old fool like me going to do with all my money? I'd rather give it to a pretty woman any time!" Walt squeezed behind the steering wheel, and the two men waved as they pulled out of the driveway.

  Walking back to the house, Sarah breathed early morning dampness deep into her lungs. Whistling quietly and thinking about her uninvited guests, she dropped her muddy shoes at the door and headed for the shower.

  Jake still puzzled her. She wasn't stupid. She knew he had a reason for landing on her doorstep. She hadn't figured out what it was yet, but she would. If he thought she believed his story, he had another think coming.

  Until she knew why he'd knocked on her door, she'd let Jake stay, but she wasn't going to drop her guard again the way she had last night. She'd been vulnerable to his kisses, and the day spent with Nicholas had triggered those impossible thoughts. In the clear light of morning, her reactions seemed even stranger.

  Sarah shook her head as she walked quietly up the stairs. She'd figure it out. The morning sunlight cast its benediction on the old hall carpet. She couldn't resist poking her

  head in where Nicholas and Jake slept. With the tip of her finger, she edged the door open.

  The long, heavily muscled length of Jake's body met her eyes and startled her into immobility. His briefs gleamed whitely against his brown skin. Touched by faint light, his muscles coiled under that skin, tempting her fingers to touch and see if they were as sleek and powerful as they looked. Jake's uplifted arm draped over his face, pulling his powerful chest into profile and making concave the ridges of his stomach where dark hair narrowed towards that bright whiteness which drew her eyes.

  Jake's empty hand, a muscular bridge, stretched towards Nicholas's rumpled and equally empty bed, but through the open window Sarah heard the boy's humming.

  Sarah wouldn't have moved for any amount of money. The sight of Jake's powerful maleness, defenseless now in sleep and tenderness, pulled at her. Just as she inhaled, Jake's arm moved, and she saw his watchful brown eyes open.

  She didn't know what to expect, whether he would cover himself or perhaps be angry. What she didn't expect was his lazy smile.

  "My, what big eyes you have, Grandma," he whispered.

  Before she realized what she was doing, she whispered back, "The better to see you with."

  Jake's mouth curved, and Sarah went hot as she realized what she was saying.

  "Naughty Red Riding Hood," he murmured, still not moving as silence settled around them.

  "It was the wolf's fault," she retorted. "He tempted her."

  "Do I, Sarah," Jake whispered, "tempt you?" His chest moved as he breathed deeply.

  Melancholy shaded his banter and made her rethink her smart-alecky retort. "Maybe," she replied, caught in the spell cast by quiet and sleepiness.

  "Only maybe?"

  His bleak smile touched her and made her forget all her resolutions.

  "Think how it might be between us, Sarah."

  She did. She thought about how it would be to stroke those long ropes of muscled male, how it would feel for him to touch her with those big hands, how it would be to lie draped over him, how it would be to say goodbye to Jake... and to Nicholas.

  Before she could shake her head, Nicholas's rat-a-tat-tatting on the tin wash bucket shattered the hush, and Jake added, "Well, can't blame a man for trying, sweetheart, but don't surprise a man when he's waking up and vulnerable to a sexy woman and not expect him to let you know how he's feeling. Sorry if I shocked you." Irritated, he lifted up on his elbows. "You better go, Sarah, before I really try to tempt you." He placed one thickly muscled thigh over the side of the bed.

  "You don't shock me." Sarah tilted her head.

  "No?" He stood up.

  Sarah didn't move. His briefs rode low on the bones of his hips and she felt overwhelmed by the sheer force of his maleness. He was big, tough, and he wanted her. The contemplation of how it would be to be wanted—and taken—by him kept her standing there as he moved toward her. Even before he touched her, she felt his heat.

  He gripped her shoulders for a second. "I'd like to kiss you silly, Sarah Jane Simpson." He pushed her gently against the door. "You know that, don't you?" Dark and heavy, his words blanketed her.

  She nodded.

  "I'd kiss those pink lips until they were red and swollen and I'd tempt you, Miss Simpson, oh, yes, I'd tempt you down paths I don't think you've ever gone." His head lowered to hers.

  Clean and sharp, his scent enveloped her. Being seriously tempted by Jake began to sound like something she wanted very much.

  "And you know what, sweet Sarah? I think you'd lead me down paths I've never gone, either." His voice was low and sad, "But I don't know if I could find the way back."

  She didn't have the slightest idea what he meant, but he sounded so desolate that she touched her fingers to his face. His bristly cheek rubbed the palm of her hand, sending tingles through her.

  "Would you leave me there, Sarah, or would you take my hand and show me the way home?" He rubbed and rubbed, but so lightly that the touch was a caress against the sensitive skin of her wrist. "And if you left me there, Sarah, what would be left for me?" For a moment he buried his face in her hand.

  "Jake, I don't know what you mean," Sarah whispered. Jake was still for a moment and then he answered, but so quietly that she wasn't sure she'd heard him. "I want you, Sarah Jane Simpson, that's what I mean, and I'd like to take you right now in your sweet-smelling room and fill up my senses with you. And then I'd want to have you all over again, and that, sweetheart, scares the daylights out of me." He laughed and she felt his breath in her palm.

  "It's not possible. You're just passing through, you and Nicholas."

  "Ah, yes. Nicholas." Jake straightened.

  "You have to take Nicholas back home."

  "But what if it weren't like that, Sarah? What then?" His fists pressed on either side of her face against the door. "If we're talking about fairy tales, wouldn't that be a swell one? Happy ever after and all that?"

  Sarah felt the brush of his crisp leg hair against her thigh.

  "Weren't you the kind of little girl who curled up under that oak tree out there with your illustrated Brothers GrimmV His fingers slid to her hair. "I can see you out

  there, you know, dreaming your dreams, your legs dangling over the edge of your swing. Did you dream of a knight on a white horse coming to sweep you off your feet?"

  He slipped the strands of her hair between his fingers and she turned her head away. A Jake bent on serious tempting was a very dangerous Jake. All her bones had turned to jelly.

  "I'm not a knight on a white horse, Sarah, but I could sweep you off your feet." Low and rough, the words invaded her senses. "I could make you forget about fairy tales for a while." His thumbs touched the skin of her eyelids. "Wouldn't you like that, Sarah, being swept off your feet?"

  His face was so near that she couldn't think. Oh, yes, she could see how she'd like having Jake sweep her off her feet, leaving her no time to think of consequences, no time to think of the future. He could do it, too.

  He smiled and touched her nose with his. "Eskimos kiss like this. Nice, isn't it?"

  "Hmm." She'd never known her nose had so many nerve endings and all of them connected to some aching place inside of her. "Very." She rubbed her nose against his.

  "See how easy it would be, sweethear
t? See how nice?"

  "But nice isn't quite the word, Jake." She turned her head.

  "No? And here I'm trying so hard to be a nice guy." His lips moved near her ear, and the tip of his tongue touched the rim. Briefly. Too briefly.

  "Ah, that's nice, Jake." She shivered.

  "I thought it might be." He chuckled as his elbows bent and he lowered his chest to her, his hand sliding to the back of her head and tugging at the braid of her hair, urging her head back.

  Her heart was racing and her mouth was dry. She'd never wanted a kiss in her life the way she wanted Jake's kiss. His lips hovered over hers, waiting.

  It was the waiting that did it. Her pulse thundered so hard that she couldn't hear anything except her own heart. She

  leaned forward, met his lips with hers, surrendered to the wild surge. And then she opened her eyes. Sharp with desire and judgmental, Jake's intent eyes pierced her to the depths of her being, so much hunger and emptiness and caution looking back at her.

  He couldn't know how naked he was. Sarah drew back. She wasn't ready for Jake and his hunger. The stakes were too high.

  "No, Sarah?" His lips moved lightly against hers. "Perhaps you're right." He lifted himself away. "But it would have been nice, I promise you." His smile was rueful, frustrated.

  "I know." Already Sarah regretted her decision, but the moment had passed. She'd finally gotten smart. She was in no shape to take on Jake Donnelly.

  Jake drew his finger lingeringly down her throat. "Get out of here, Sarah, while I can still remember why I should let you."

  "But—"

  "Now. Because if you stay, I won't let you go a second time. I won't remember that it's not nice to seduce little girls who dream of knights on white horses, sweet Sarah, so go while you can." He opened the door and shoved her out.

  Sarah looked at the closed door for a second, her whole body aching, feeling the lure of Jake's longing and need. Her lips trembled on her whisper, "You're a fraud, Jake Donnelly." Her fingers burned where they brushed the door. As she turned to her room, she heard Jake call out the window to Nicholas.

  Gathering up underwear, sleepshirt and socks, Sarah stretched. She couldn't remember being this drained in years.

  She couldn't get Nicholas out of her mind, and Jake-sure, Jake was shaking her world like a dog with a rag doll. It would be nice having the two of them around for a while, she thought drowsily.

  Barely awake, she leaned her forehead against the shower wall, smiling as she soaped and rinsed. Jake was like a half-wild dog, circling around a camp fire but reluctant to approach its warmth, but with Nicholas, Jake came in out of the cold.

  Throwing the sleepshirt over her still damp body, she tumbled into bed. If she could just sleep for four hours now, she'd be a new woman. Oddly, her last coherent thought as her head hit the pillow and stayed there was about Nicholas's ears.

  Through layers of sleep-chained consciousness, Sarah heard voices. She wanted to put her feet on the floor, knew she was going to stand up any second.

  "Let her sleep, sport. She's tired." A door closed quietly.

  "She wouldn't want to sleep, Jake. Sarah likes to get up and do things. She told me so. She's gonna be real mad if we leave her out."

  "I don't think she'll mind if we make breakfast while she sleeps. Let's go down and see what we can find."

  "This is a big mistake. Sarah promised we'd go fishing today, and she really wants to. I told her I'd bait her hook." Nicholas's voice faded away, and with an insistent tug sleep summoned Sarah.

  Downstairs, Jake opened cupboard doors. The neatly lined shelves didn't surprise him. Flour, sugar, oatmeal, all in tidy glass jars. Safe... unlike Sarah. He'd let her get to him again, and he couldn't afford to. He had to keep his hands off her. He'd seen the wad of money in her pocket. God only knew where she'd gotten that kind of cash. "What's in the fridge, sport?"

  "Lots of good stuff. Some weird stuff. How about a sandwich? I used to make sandwiches for me and Dad." Nicholas tilted his head inquiringly.

  It was just the way Sarah tilted her head. "I think we need rib-sticking food if we're going fishing. Any eggs in there?"

  "I don't like eggs, Jake. You ever think about eggs? I saw a movie once. You know where eggs come from, Jake? Yuck." Nicholas screwed his face up in disgust.

  "You got a point there." Jake tried not to laugh. "No eggs, then."

  "How about a jelly sandwich? Here's that guava stuff Sarah makes. It's sticky. I had some yesterday."

  "You're really big on sandwiches, aren't you?" Jake squatted down to look in the refrigerator.

  "Sure. They're great. Look, Sarah's even got squishy white bread. I love squishy bread." Nicholas squished the bread.

  Jake took the bread. "What about cereal?"

  "Nah. A sandwich."

  "A sandwich, huh. Let me think a minute." Jake poked behind some boxes, opened the meat drawer. The kid was too skinny. He needed a good breakfast. "Okay, but it has to be a Jake's Special. Fair enough?"

  "Sure. What you want me to do?" Nicholas pulled a chair over to the counter. "You know something, Jake? Me and you do neat stuff together," he confided, leaning against Jake.

  "Yeah?" Jake shifted to make Nicholas comfortable and then lopped off margarine and tossed it into a cast-iron skillet. The lump sizzled and melted.

  "Dad didn't do stuff. But he was tired a lot," Nicholas added loyally.

  "That was tough." Jake slapped three pieces of bread in the skillet and topped them with ham and cheese before slicing a brilliant red tomato onto the cheese and finishing each sandwich with a slice of bread.

  "Jake, I'm hungry. When are these Specials gonna be ready?"

  4 'We have to flip them over and fry the top side." Jake handed a spatula to Nicholas. 'Think you can do that?"

  Nicholas gripped the spatula in a tight fist and jammed it under one of the sandwiches. Tomato and bread flew sideways.

  "Slow down, sport." Jake held Nicholas's hand under his bigger one and showed him how to ease the spatula all the way under while flipping quickly. Nicholas's eyebrows met in concentration.

  Jake felt a pang as he thought about leaving Nicholas. He could teach the kid a lot. Nicholas picked up things like a sponge. He couldn't leave him with a mother who disappeared during the night. "Good job. That's the way," he encouraged, as Nicholas flipped the other two sandwiches.

  "I know," Nicholas asserted. "It's not hard. I'm gonna get the sodas now, Jake. You can make coffee if you want it, but soda's better."

  "Whoa!" Jake grabbed the tail of Nicholas's shirt. "No soda for breakfast, kid. Milk. Or juice."

  Nicholas frowned. "Why not?"

  "Not good for you."

  Nicholas jammed his fists on his nonexistent hips and glared at Jake. "You say that a lot, Jake, but you eat doughnuts and stuff. And you drink soda."

  "But not for breakfast. Here," Jake handed him a glass. "Milk."

  Nicholas took it and trudged to the refrigerator. "Dumb stuff, milk. You ever think about milk, Jake? You know where it comes from?"

  Coming in on the tail end of the exchange, Sarah stifled her laugh.

  "Jake's right, Nicholas," she said as she stepped inside. "You need milk. When you get older, you can drink what you want."

  "How old I gotta be?"

  "Oh, about as old as Jake, I think. That would be old enough."

  Nicholas assessed Jake. "I dunno, Sarah, that'd be a long time to wait. Jake's awful old."

  Jake grunted. 'This old man's ready for something to eat. You know how us old folks are. We get cranky if we're not fed on a regular basis."

  "So do pit bulls." Sarah wrinkled her nose.

  "And you know how dangerous they are when they're riled, don't you?" Jake noticed how Sarah's lips dented in when she tried to hold back her smile. Her lips had been silky warm He frowned. "Sit down and eat, Nicholas."

  Nicholas giggled. "I didn't mean to hurt your feelings, Jake." He turned to Sarah. "When we going fishing?"

  "D
on't push it, sport." Jake cut Nicholas's sandwich into quarters.

  "No, it's all right. I promised I'd take him. Just let me wake up a bit and we'll see what we need, okay?" She smiled when Nicholas looked relieved. "Were you worried?"

  He chewed a nail. "Sometimes people forget promises. Jake doesn't, though."

  Jake's hard face softened as he spoke to Nicholas. "Promises are important, kid. I told you that."

  "Do you keep all your promises?" Sarah took out milk and a tall glass.

  "I don't make promises." But of course he had. He'd promised to take care of Nicholas.

  Sarah opened the silverware drawer and removed an iced tea spoon. She put the spoon in the glass and poured coffee in as she thought about Jake's comment. "You never make promises?"

  He tilted his chair back. "Very seldom." He frowned as he watched her.

  Sarah wondered if he remembered what he'd said before he sent her from the room. Hadn't that been a promise? "That's a hard way to live. People need promises and com-

  mitments from other people. They need to know they can count on each other." She added three spoonfuls of sugar to the hot coffee and then poured in cold milk to the top of the glass. Vigorously stirring, she sank into a chair.

  "Most people make easy promises that aren't worth a hill of beans. So what difference does it make if I don't make any?"

  "I'm not sure." She ran her finger around the chilled rim of her glass. Jake sounded annoyed. What kind of life had he had to make him so distrustful? Even in her darkest moments, she'd never been that cynical. "Don't you get lonely?"

  "No." But she noticed that his eyes slid to Nicholas.

  "What happens when you do make promises?" Sarah persisted, wanting to hear the words. She drank her iced coffee and watched as Jake chewed his sandwich.

  "Then I keep them." He scowled and answered her question before she asked it. "Always."

  "Then you're a person people can depend on." Sarah didn't like the shadow that moved over his face. He looked as though he wanted to argue but couldn't. She let him off the hook. "That's enough serious talk for the morning, right, Nicholas? Don't you think we need to head out to the lake before the day gets away from us?"

  "Yeah!" Nicholas shoved his plate away and leaped up.