The Andy Warhol Diaries

by Andy Warhol

  Kent Klineman was at the office talking to Fred and me about the Cowboys and Indians portfolio he’s commissioning.

  Went to the Eric Fischl show at the Whitney and it was really interesting. The paintings are off, the perspectives are wrong, but somehow they’re right. They’re like Playboy illustrations. Talked to Eric. Thanked Mary Boone for having us.

  Thursday, February 20, 1986

  There was a lunch at the office for three of Paige’s advertisers and also for Billy Boy to give him a Barbie portrait. Bettina was with him. Rupert came up with some work before he was going off to Patrick’s funeral. Anthony d’Offay was there from London to check on the Self-Portraits.

  Ended up the day watching the Letterman show with Ron Reagan, Jr. on and he’s really changed. I was surprised he was so forward. And Letterman was just so thrilled to have him on. And the daughter’s got a People cover for her trashy book, so the whole family is out there hustling.

  Friday, February 21, 1986

  Worked all afternoon. Rupert didn’t come because he was still at the funeral. Live for today, Dear Diary. Worked really late.

  Saturday, February 22, 1986

  At the office Sam tried to take pictures of me that I need to work from for the Self-Portraits for the English show, and I’d done my hair in curlers and everything and he just couldn’t get it right, and when Sam can’t get something right right away he gets frustrated and quits and has sort of a tantrum and I can see why he never finished school.

  Sunday, February 23, 1986

  I went to church. I still haven’t paid the guy for the raffle. I didn’t win, and so do you think I should mail it to him, the $100? I don’t know, I guess I will.

  Fred called and said the Hammer & Sickles went low. My prices were up until that de Menil auction and that brought them down. And Tony Shafrazi’s show was bad for everyone. If he’d only waited and done it this year. There was no rush, and then it would’ve been that we’d be still painting together. But then all shows are like that—you have a show and then it’s over, and you’ve used up all your material.

  Monday, February 24, 1986

  Cabbed to the office to meet Rupert and he was back from the funeral ($5). I didn’t talk about it until later that night because I didn’t want to bring it up, but he said it was weird. And Edmund calls Rupert all the time, at all hours, because he’s so nervous. I invited Rupert to a movie after work.

  It was a busy afternoon with people coming by. Gael came in to show me pictures of Joe Dallesandro that Greg Gorman took for Interview, and God, he’s still so handsome, he looks really good—his skin is really strong, I guess.

  Oh, and Dolly Fox is dating Steven Greenberg and asking me to find out what the story on him and Margaux is. She said he picked her up at 8:00 and she was with him till 5:00 and he wants to see her again on Tuesday.

  Saw the Rob Lowe skating movie, then took Rupert to Serendipity for cake and the waiters sang and he felt better ($20).

  Tuesday, February 25, 1986

  Jean Michel called and said he found a dead person in his backyard yesterday. He called the police and they were in the backyard all day, and by 6:00 they still hadn’t taken the body away. He was from the flophouse next door. And Jean Michel sent the cat that didn’t catch rats down to Atlanta, he sent it on a plane for $100 down to some gallery there. The poor cat probably never got taken care of—I mean, can you imagine being a cat in the hands of Jean Michel?

  Tried to work with Fred and with Vincent, but my room is so filled with junk, I can’t pull out of it. I tried on wigs from Fiorucci but it looked like too much of a big-hat wig, too outrageous. This is for the Self-Portraits. Paige called a couple of times from the fat farm she went to and it was fun talking to her. The Music issue is going to cost us a lot. Cyndi Lauper is the cover.

  Thursday, February 27, 1986

  Oh and that lady Halston was supposed to bring down for a portrait cancelled, but I mean, anybody who keeps telling you she’s got a check for $999 million in her pocketbook is either having a nervous breakdown or she’s on coke.

  And Arnold Schwarzenegger never called back. He was going to have Maria Shriver’s portrait done for a wedding present and then her mother and cousins, too.

  Friday, February 28, 1986

  Sam and I went to the Eastside Cinema to see Hollywood Vice (tickets $12, popcorn $5). The people behind us complained that they couldn’t see over my hair, so that threw me and we moved over two seats. I didn’t move my backpack with me, though. During the movie the Exit door opened a few times. After it was over, we left, and when we got outside I realized that I hadn’t taken my bag, so Sam went back in to get it and it was gone. So then we looked everywhere, in all the bathrooms and things, and in all the trash baskets, and we told the people at the theater, but it wasn’t anywhere and they don’t care. It had bank statements and makeup and an ashtray from a restaurant and receipts. No keys. Three oranges, telephone bills, my Prudential health insurance cards, some money. So we ran around the block checking every trash basket, Sam felt terrible, and a big truck almost ran into us but missed us and ran into a lamppost. So I went home and I felt violated. They stole the monkey off my back. But it’s actually a relief. I’ve decided I won’t replace it.

  And my brother told me that Victor Bockris has taken out an ad in the Pittsburgh paper about getting people who knew me to talk to him for the book he’s writing about me.

  Sunday, March 2, 1986

  Went to church and saw Adolfo and felt a little hurt because he walked right by and didn’t say hello. In my mind I always picture him in a little Chanel-type suit. I believe they should wear some version of what they design.

  Went to Christie’s and Phillips, and since my bag was stolen I’ve had invasion dreams. Nutty dreams with invasions. Went home.

  Sam and PH picked me up and we went to the Hard Rock Café for Paul Shaffer’s live radio show (cab $7). And Paul had Christopher Reeve there, and he said he loved the Greg Gorman pictures of him in Interview. And Peter Frampton was there and two Grateful Deads and two Cars. And we met Steve Jordan, the drummer in Paul Shaffer’s band on Letterman, and he’s just adorable—he’s intelligent and sexy.

  I was mobbed by little girls on the way out and signed autographs and then we got a cab and I gave Sam money to drop us off ($7).

  Wednesday, March 5, 1986

  Jay’s back from Paris and he said he had a good time there. All the de Menil family was there, too, because Pierre Schlumberger died (phones $2, newspapers $2).

  When I got to the office I caught the tail end of a lunch for this guy named Stringfellow who was opening a club on East 21st Street and he acted funny and left in a weird way, so I began to think that maybe it was because I hadn’t been at the whole lunch. And Fred didn’t understand, either, what the problem was, but then later Paige called the girl who was with him and found out that that was the problem, that he was offended that I wasn’t there. He’s English. But then later on he called and did take an ad.

  Friday, March 7, 1986

  It was freezing out. Went with the nutritionist I met on the blind date to see Out of Africa at the Greenwich Theater. It was two and a half hours long. It’s another one of those movies where nothing happens—they do this and then they do that and then they do this and then they do that, but there’s no action.

  Saturday, March 8, 1986—New York—New Hope, Pennsylvania—New York

  John Reinhold picked me up with his Japanese car and we went to New Hope to talk to Rupert about art projects. His house is like a stage set. Rupert is the grand man around town with two Bentleys. The house was a mill, it looks like old Rome with the ruins in parts. Four Persian cats. Fireplaces working all the time. His cousin, a girl, came from New York to make a cake for us and she baked bread, too, which was the best thing.

  New Hope is 90 percent gay. We went to a place called Ramona’s and a drag queen served us and people were there drinking at 2 P.M. Gay old guys. It was too gay for me, it drove me craz
y. Like a time warp. A gay hotel-motel. The drag queen looked like Rupert’s mother with the blonde beehive. She had on pants but a four-inch leather belt really tightening in her waist. And a guy came over and said Rupert was an alien and Rupert said, “I am not an alien. I am Rupert Jason Smith” (lunch $60). And then Rupert said I had to leave the drag queen a big tip since she stayed open for us (tip $25). Gave me goosebumps. Then we went to places run by gay sons and fat mothers. Antiques places. Then we went back to the house and the girl had made a dessert, and we ate lots of bread. Then at 7:30 we left for New York and then after John dropped me off I remembered that I’d been invited to Chastity Bono’s birthday party.

  So I cabbed downtown to Sixth Avenue between 9th and 10th, a Mexican restaurant ($6). The party was in full swing. Every girl was like a movie star, I mean, she’d copied a look. Some looked like Molly Ringwald, there were three or four Madonnas. Cher didn’t come to the party because she and Chastity had a fight. Chastity goes to the School of Performing Arts. Stayed till 12:30 (cab $7).

  Sunday, March 9, 1986

  In the Times it said that Imelda Marcos left 3,000 pairs of shoes in the Philippines. Maybe she was trash, I mean when I think about the type of people they were wining and dining. And they found porno in Marcos’s room. It’s like if somebody went through your apartment and wrote about it (laughs) in The New York Times. “This Is Your Apartment.” That’s a good TV show. “Here are two cups that were apparently taken from the Plaza Hotel. Tell us about them.” They could do it in Russia. In Russia they could really do it. “So, you like wearing ladies’ perfume, Mr. Warhol?”

  Ran into Billy Boy at the flea market buying old bottles of Schiaparelli and Chanel perfume in his powder-green coat. He really puts out the money and just pays whatever they say, he spent about $1,000 I think. He has a good eye, he can really pick out the good stuff.

  Thursday, March 13, 1986

  It was raining hard. Paige and I went over to the Paris Theater and saw Room with a View. Nothing really happens, an Out of Africa-type thing, but it’s beautiful. Good views of Florence.

  Friday, March 14, 1986

  Gee, these artists who’re living the life of Riley. Keith’s just off in Brazil and I hear Fischl’s getting $100,000 a canvas now, more than Schnabel.

  I was picked up by Steven Greenberg in his limo and we went over to Stuart Pivar’s for an advertising dinner. And Paige was in her Chinese robe so Stuart put his on and then Dennis Smith the ex-fireman who wrote a bestselling book put on a caballero hat with a rose in his teeth and he’s Irish, so he was singing and getting ready for St. Patrick’s Day and that was unusual, it was fun. Then he mentioned having five kids, and I don’t know what happened to the wife, so Paige had been interested, but when she heard “five kids” that was too much. But he’s really great, very intelligent. He’s now looking for a hostess.

  Sunday, March 16, 1986

  I went to church. Adolfo was in the last row. Gave the doorman at one of the buildings on the way an Interview, and he was black and I always feel good giving black people the magazine when it’s a black cover like the Grace Jones issue and the Richard Pryor one this time.

  And the Marcoses are still all in the news. Now they’ve found 3,000 black panties. And it’s funny to hear a congressman say, “Why did she need so many panties?” I wish I had the shirt that the Marcos son once gave me right off his back a couple of years ago. And their Bulgari bill was for a million.

  Tuesday, March 18, 1986

  Arnold Schwarzenegger called and said the portraits of Maria were on again.

  Paul Morrissey’s doing movies with David Weisman now.

  I bumped my head yesterday and got dizzy. I think I might have got a mild concussion.

  Then cabbed to meet Paige and Henri Bendel at a Chinese restaurant on 44th and U.N. Plaza (cab $5). Mr. Bendel owned Bendel’s till he sold out in 1955. Now he just has the handmade shoe company, Belgium Shoes. He said he’s lonely so I said why didn’t he get a dog and he said that he had a beagle and then he was walking it on the leash and it went to the curb and a cab just ran it over on the leash. And he had to go back and tell his wife who was still alive that the dog was killed. He’s from Louisiana.

  Went home and watched Letterman and he had some good pet tricks on.

  Wednesday, March 19, 1986

  It was a beautiful day. I had a meeting with Martin Poll and I didn’t know why. I walked over to 57th and Seventh Avenue to his office and he said, “We want to do your life story,” and he started talking about the sixties and interweaving four stories, and I told him that a wonderful movie had already been made on the sixties, and that he should just remake it— The Magic Garden of Stanley Sweetheart—and he said, “I made that movie.” I completely forgot that he had. I didn’t know that. He discovered Don Johnson. He was going to use Richard Thomas and then changed to Don Johnson. So then I mentioned money and he said, “Money? Money? What money? It’s publicity for you.” So I told him he should talk to Fred, that what he should do is just buy the rights to Popism and that we’d be consultants on the movie. PH would do the script. And then he started talking about Viva and Joe Dallesandro and everything and I ran out of there (newspapers $2, cab $6).

  Went to Walter Stait’s dinner party on East 57th Street (cab $6). Then took Sam to Serendipity. Had a hot fudge sundae and the sugar made me tip so much. I felt generous ($25).

  Got home, turned on Letterman and saw the show they wanted me to be the guest on, the one with the monkey with the camera, and they had Dr. Ruth Westheimer on. Wouldn’t it be funny if Dr. Ruth didn’t really have an accent?

  Brigid just called and said that at A.A. everybody in the office was there—Don Munroe, and Yoko Ono’s maid who I like, and Kate Harrington and Sue Etkin and no wonder nothing gets done—we have a bunch of drunks working for us.

  When I called the office yesterday and asked Michael Walsh for a phone number from the Rolodex he was gone two minutes and came back and told me my own number! So I screamed, and he said, “Oh sorry, I guess hearing your name made me look up your number.”

  Thursday, March 20, 1986

  Si Newhouse came to the office and he’s not sure about buying the Elvis and the Tuna Fish.

  Monday, March 24, 1986

  On the news they busted a porno ring, and they were leading the Boy Scout master and the teacher out tied with rope. (laughs) It was odd-looking.

  Went home after dinner with Jean Michel and caught the Academy Awards. Saw Geraldine Page saying she deserved it, and all those old ladies coming out in eight yards of material—Debbie Reynolds and Cyd Charisse and June Allyson and Ann Miller and Kathryn Grayson.

  Tuesday, March 25, 1986

  Maria Shriver called and postponed until next week because she said she’d broken four toes.

  Went to the Grand Hyatt to the Emmys with Keith. I told them I didn’t want to say any lines, so they announced I had laryngitis and that’s why I wasn’t saying anything. But when they announced that, some people laughed—they knew. And then this guy who said he was the doctor of the Emmys came and said he’d fix my laryngitis, so I explained I didn’t really have any.

  After this thing was over, walked over to the office and there was a lunch going on. Mrs. de Menil was with Iolas there, and Fred gave them a tour and he got mad at me because I wasn’t with her enough. Iolas’s bags were lost but he says he loves shopping at Alexander’s to replace the things.

  Wednesday, March 26, 1986

  Oh, these commercials on TV for the Enquirer. Carroll Baker’s doing them this week talking about the book she just wrote about her experiences in Africa in 1970. I honestly think it’s made up. She probably read a nature book and said those things happened to her. Who would know? She talks about being so hungry she bit off a lizard’s head and sucked out the fluid. But I mean, maybe she was giving a blow job in a tent and a lizard walked by and she fantasized.

  I’d invited Sam to the opening of the Fellini movie Fred and Ginger at MOMA. I g
et so involved with Sam, you can waste a whole day with somebody and their dumb little problems.

  And then Fred said, “Why am I working here if you’re not going to be a good artist!” He doesn’t like my work. And I told him that if I did this other stuff, the young kids do it better. Really, what is life about? You get sick and die. That’s it. So you’ve just got to keep busy.

  We got to the museum really early. And after it was over, Fellini was being photographed and he saw me and he was great, he called me over and kissed me on both cheeks and introduced me to his wife who really looks good in person.

  Thursday, March 27, 1986

  Went to Le Cirque to meet Paige and Gael and someone from Young & Rubicam for dinner and Claire Trevor came in with Donald Brooks and she told me I was wonderful and I told her she was and she said, “No, you’re more wonderful,” and I said no, she was. And she ate like Paulette and those women—she had shad roe with three strips of bacon and cigarettes and vanilla ice cream. Then Keith Haring was having a party for his TV segment on 20/20 (cab $6). We got there just as it was over.