“Hey, Tasha.” I spoke in a cheerful manner as my heart beat to a fast pace. I didn’t think I would run into her today.
“Hello.” She looked at me as if she didn’t remember where she knew me from.
“I’m Melody. Rodney introduced us at the club awhile back.”
She smiled and said, “Oh, hey. I was trying to figure out where I knew you from. I haven’t seen you in a while.” Tasha was Rodney’s sister.
That’s because I’ve been busy stressing over your brother. “Yes, I’ve been busy with my business and with my daughter’s sports and stuff.” I kept a friendly smile pasted on my face.
“Oh, that’s cool. Well, let me go and tell my beautician that I’m here, and I’ll be right back,” she said as she walked to the back. She was an attractive dark-skinned, plus-size chick. She had flawless skin, and she always dressed nice. She was older than me, but I didn’t know her age. Rodney really didn’t talk much about her. All I knew about her was that she had two young boys, and that she worked as an administrator at a daycare center.
When Tasha came back to the waiting area, she sat right next to me. “So, how have you been doing?” She crossed one leg over the other and sat up straight in her chair.
“I’m good. How about you?” I said with a forced smile. I kept it short because I wasn’t going to tell her how I really felt.
“I’m good, life is good. When was the last time you saw my knucklehead brother?” she asked without taking a breath. I knew that was coming.
“Um, I talked to him yesterday.” I was becoming uncomfortable. I wasn’t used to talking to her, so I didn’t want to get too personal, but I did want to pick her for information about my baby’s father.
“Well, that’s cool. I’m glad y’all are still cool. I know he’s got some crazy shit going on in his life. But he talked about you in the past, and he really cares about you.” She smiled jauntily at me.
He really cares about you. Those words made my heart smile. I knew Rodney cared about me; we’d been through a lot of stuff together. It was just good to hear someone else say it for a change.
Then I wondered what she was talking about. Rodney and I hadn’t really discussed anything he was going through. He was kind of distant with me, and I didn’t want to pry information from him. I just thought he would talk to me when he felt like it. I didn’t want to run him away. He knew I was there for him when he needed me.
“Yeah, we’ve been talking, and he said he was becoming overwhelmed with the situation he was in,” I lied, trying to push more information out of her.
“So, you know about ol’ girl?” she asked me with questioning eyes.
Is she talking about the chick that’s been living with him? “You’re talking about the girl that’s staying with him?” I asked, hoping she would tell more.
“Damn, y’all must be real tight for him to tell you about what’s going on. So, he told you that the chick ain’t trying to leave? My brother is crazy ’cause he just won’t put her out. They got the blood test back, and the baby is not his, so I don’t know why he just don’t put her out. She’s got some type of hold on him. He tells me that he cares for you. I always tell him that he needs to get his act together because he’s too old to be—” She paused. Then she said, “He needs to just get his shit together.” I knew she wanted to say that he was fuckin’ around, but she stopped herself because that was her brother.
I was also glad to know that the blood test confirmed that the baby wasn’t his. I wanted to jump for joy, but I didn’t. I stayed calm and collected. So, Rodney was telling me the truth when he said he didn’t want her there, but I already felt that in my heart because that whore wasn’t even cute. He just felt sorry for her, and he’s got a good heart, so he wasn’t gonna put her and her baby out in the streets. But I was going to do something about that situation real quick.
I wanted to smile, but I didn’t because I didn’t want her to see my emotions. “He just doesn’t want her to be on the streets,” I confessed. That’s what he told me. I looked at Tasha, and it looked as if she wanted to say more. I tried to give her time to say what was on her mind, but then Deedee called me to her chair. Damn! Tasha told me to give her my number so that we could do lunch some time or just kick it. She locked my number in her phone, and I went to get my hair done up.
33
Asia
Our honeymoon was over, and I had a great time on the island with my hubby. I never imaged it to be that beautiful. It was like paradise, and I didn’t want to leave. If it weren’t for the kids, Steve and I would’ve stayed a few more days. But they were blowing my phone up because they couldn’t wait to hear how much fun we had, and they were excited to see what we brought back from the island for them. Steve and I had to purchase another suitcase to pack all the souvenirs we bought for the kids. I couldn’t wait to see their faces when they got their gifts.
When we made it home, I decided to take the kids to their favorite spot, Chuck E. Cheese’s. They hated that we were gone for a week, but they did enjoy spending time with my mother and stepdad. I hadn’t talked to Melody and Sasha since I came back in town, so I told Melody that I wanted to hook up with them so I could tell them about my trip. Melody said that she would let Sasha know and that we could meet at San Marco’s, a Mexican restaurant located on the south end of town. They had good food and the best margaritas in the city.
Sasha and I had been distant ever since I hooked her up with David. David and I had spent one night together in college, and we had just been cool after that. When I saw him in the club eyeballing Sasha, I told him who she was, and they ended up getting together. I didn’t think that Sasha’s married ass was going to go home with him, but she did, and I guess that’s what caused her divorce. But I was going to be the grown up about the situation and apologize to her. Life was too short, and we needed to squash it. Besides, I heard she had a new guy in her life, and I was happy for her. Now that I had my husband, I wasn’t mad at her anymore for marrying my high school crush. Everything was good; Sasha and I could get back to how things used to be between us.
I left the kids with Steve and jumped into my car to go meet Melody and Sasha. I decided to dress casual with a pair of stonewashed jeans and a black shirt that had FLAWLESS printed across the front. When I walked into the restaurant, I saw Sasha. She just gave me the stank face right before Melody got up to give me a hug.
“Hey, girl. You’re lookin’ cute,” Melody said.
“Thanks, you do too,” I said. I knew that Sasha wasn’t feeling me, but I didn’t give a damn. I went over to her and gave her a one-armed hug since she didn’t get up from her seat. It was time to squash the beef, and it looked like I was gonna be the one to mend our relationship.
“Did y’all order y’all’s food yet?” I asked.
“Nope, we were waiting on you,” Melody answered as she took a sip from her drink.
“What you drinking?” I asked as I picked up the menu from the table.
“Girl, I don’t know. I forgot what the waiter said this concoction was. I told her to give me the best cocktail drink, and she brought me out this. It’s pretty good too.” Melody smiled and took another sip. Sasha was looking at her phone as if we weren’t even sitting at the table together. So rude.
After the waiter took our order, we chitchatted about the wedding.
“Yo’ wedding was the shit. Everybody came out to support you. I was shocked to see Uncle Bobby’s old-school ass up in the mix. He looked a hot mess,” Melody laughed out loud.
“Leave that man alone. He just loss his wife; he’s probably still mourning,” I said.
“Girl, he probably is, but he knew he could have put together something else to wear. That suit was outdated when Ronald Reagan was president,” Melody said, and we all burst out laughing.
“But on a serious note, I’m so happy that you and Steve finally tied the knot. It seems like he’s a much better dude since he got out of prison,” Melody said as she chewed her food.<
br />
“Yes, he is a good dude, and the kids love him. As long as my kids are happy, then I’m happy. But I do love him; he’s getting his shit together. His business is booming, and he’s such a caring and giving person. So, yes, he has changed a lot,” I said.
“What’s going on with your love life, Sasha?” Melody asked.
Sasha raised her eyes from her food and said, “Girl, I’m living my life like it’s golden. As a matter of fact, Lamel and I are going to Jamaica in a week,” she boasted.
“Are you serious? Damn, girl, he must have a lot of money for y’all to be goin’ way out there,” Melody spoke with excitement.
“Yeah, he’s paid. I told you that his parents owned a law firm.” She smirked with confidence.
“I know you’re gonna have fun. I wish I had someone to take me somewhere out of Toledo. Shit, I would be satisfied with a trip to Chicago. Anywhere. I ain’t hard to please,” Melody moped.
Melody looked as if she was gaining weight. I noticed her face was a little fuller, and her hips were spreading. I hoped it was just food and not pregnancy. From the last I heard, she and Rodney were still not on the same page. Let my mama tell it, they weren’t even in the same book. My mother and Aunt Darlene were always talking, and my mother knew how to get things out of people before they even knew that they had slipped and told her.
“Melody, you sure are looking good with that extra weight you put on.” I smiled.
Melody’s eyes widened, and she swallowed hard. In a nervous tone, she said, “Thanks.”
That heffa was pregnant. I wanted to say something, but I didn’t. When she was ready to tell us, she would. I hoped she wasn’t hiding it because she was planning on having an abortion.
The table was quiet while we finished our food, and Sasha still hadn’t said a single word to me. “Sasha, I want to apologize to you about the incident with David. We were cool in college, and what we had wasn’t nothing. I just thought it would be cool to introduce y’all when he asked me who you were. I didn’t have enough time to tell you that we had hooked up once back in the day.” I spoke sincerely.
“Girl, please. Why are you bringing that up? That was so yesterday. I ain’t thinking about that man and what y’all had. My life is good, and like I said, my man and I will be taking a private jet away from here. I can’t be happier about the space I’m in now.”
Sasha was definitely giving me attitude, but I didn’t care. I just wanted to get that off my chest. I’d been trying to be a better person. I knew I had done some dirt in my life, and I had been thinking about giving myself to the Lord. After that scare I had with Lance, maybe if I prayed and went to church at least one Sunday out of the month, God would get that devil out of my life for good. I hoped he was done harassing me.
“Well, I’m glad y’all can get past that bull from the past. We’re family, and we need to stick together and keep the nonsense and drama out of our circle,” Melody admonished. She was always trying to fix other folks’ broken relationships, but she couldn’t fix her own. I just nodded my head in agreement. I wanted to hurry up and finish my food so I could get back to my husband. We were newlyweds, and I didn’t want to be away from him too long.
34
Sasha
I really wasn’t in the mood to look at Asia, let alone speak to her fake-acting ass. I knew I shouldn’t have agreed to go out and eat with Melody. I knew she would have something up her sleeve. She didn’t tell me that Asia would be joining us. When she arrived, I almost got up from my seat and walked out. But I had decided to stay because my mouth was watering for the tasty and fulfilling steak burrito they served. I didn’t say anything to her; I acted as if she wasn’t even there. That trick was such a hypocrite. She mentioned that she was thinking about going to a Baptist church so that God could forgive her of her sins. She had better be careful that she doesn’t get struck down when she walks through the doors of the church. She was so confused about life and her place in it. She didn’t know what the hell she wanted to do.
Last year she talked about becoming a Muslim because Steve told her that he was reading the Quran while he was locked up and that she needed to try it out. Melody asked her what made her decide that she wanted to join a Baptist church. That fool said that she was touched after she watched Kanye West’s Jesus Walks video on BET. She said she wanted to right her wrongs. I almost choked on my drink listening to her dumb ass.
She went on and on about how she was being a better mother and how she thought she needed to give thanks to God for delivering her. That was another reason why she said she wanted to start going to church. That was something new to my ears because all Asia did was call her kids names and talk down to them. She would call them fat ass, bastards, and retarded right in their face. I didn’t want kids, and I didn’t even like being around them, but I wouldn’t call them names to their face because I knew that would affect their self-esteem.
As I drove home from the restaurant, I thought about the talk my mother and I had yesterday. I couldn’t believe she didn’t remember that she had done those horrible things to me as a child. And I couldn’t believe that a doctor had diagnosed her with a mental illness, and she wasn’t getting treated for it. After she left my apartment, I googled schizophrenia and found out that it was a disorder in which people interpreted reality abnormally. It affected how a person thought, felt, and acted. It couldn’t be cured, but treatment may help. In severe cases, patients could see or hear things that were definitely not real.
I read that some of the signs of the disorder were hearing or seeing something that wasn’t there. The patients could experience constant feelings of being watched, and they would oftentimes increase in withdrawal from social situations. I also read that the disorder caused inappropriate or bizarre behavior and irrational angry and fearful responses to loved ones.
As I read, I looked to see if it was genetic and found that the article I was reading said schizophrenia had a strong hereditary component. I, being my mother’s child, had a 10 percent chance of developing the disorder. When I read that, it sent chills up my spine. I didn’t want to read any more. What if I was in that 10 percent? My head started to throb at that thought.
I lay my head down for a few minutes to see if that would help. My mind wandered back to my childhood when my mother would lock me in the closet and tell me that she did that because someone was watching us or spying on us and trying to kill me. Her situation was crazy, but how in the world was she able to live a normal life and not take any medication after I left home? She had told me that she didn’t believe what the doctor had told her, so she just walked out of the hospital.
I decided to do a little more research, and as I scrolled down the page on my computer, I saw that delusions and hallucinations were disturbances that were added to the person’s personality. My mother was definitely delusional and paranoid; she always thought people were after us. She also would hear voices.
After I read all the information that I found on the Internet, I went to YouTube and watched interviews on people with the disorder. It brought tears to my eyes to hear what the people went through when dealing with issues in their everyday life. In the back of my mind, I thought that I should have someone talk to my mom to see what she can do to make her life better. But when we talked, she acted as if she hadn’t had any symptoms.
She asked me why I hadn’t told anyone that she did those things to me when I was young. I told her that I was scared to talk because I thought I would be taken from her and put in foster care. She understood where I was coming from. Then she dropped the subject and walked away like we weren’t talking.
I wanted to spend more time with her, just to see how she acted throughout her everyday life. I told her that I forgave her for treating me the way she did because she didn’t mean to do it; she was ill. It was crazy because we hadn’t seen each other in years, and I carried so much anger around toward her. Now, I just wanted my mother back. I told her she could stay with me for a while. She look
ed at me as if I were a ghost. Then she told me no. She said she wanted to be in the comfort of her own home. I didn’t know what it was, but I was really worried about her, and I wanted to be there for her.
35
Melody
It was late at night when my doorbell rang. Immediately, I knew who it was, and as pissed as I was at him for standing me up the last time, I decided that I would let him in. I quickly threw on an oversized shirt and my extrathick robe to keep him from seeing my size and opened the door to let him in.
“You missed me?” He asked that question as if everything between us was okay.
“No,” I said, but I was lying. Of course I missed him.
“You gon’ turn on a light in this piece and let me see that pretty face of yours?” he questioned as he stepped inside and closed and locked the door behind him.
“Boy, it’s almost midnight, and I’m half asleep. I ain’t trying to turn on no lights and wake myself all the way up. What the heck do you want?” I snapped at him.
He was looking so good standing there that I was immediately wet for him.
“I want to talk,” he said as he stepped around me and gave me that smile that made me fall in love with him.
“Mmm-hmm. That means you want to have sex with me. But the answer is no.” I spoke with anger in my voice. Rodney didn’t seem to hear me as he gently gripped my shoulders and spun me around until my back was to the door he had just stepped through.
“Come on, bae,” he said as he stepped closer to me, forcing me to step back until my behind hit the door. “Trust me, I really do want to talk.”
“No, Rodney, you want to fuck.” I squinted my eyes angrily at him.
“I promise you I want to talk.” He spoke sincerely.
No Perfect Affair Page 14