Her Deadly Secret

by Chris Curran

  He took a breath and walked back to the van to head for home.

  Rosie

  The police were there soon after Rosie got in. Her knees felt so weak she had to sit on the sofa and regretted doing so when they stayed standing. It felt so like the time of Alice’s death.

  They asked how well she and Alice had known Natalie Grant. She had tried to think what to say on the drive back from Bexhill, but had been so overwhelmed with a sense of dread that her mind seemed to have shut down.

  At least she could truthfully say that she hadn’t known Natalie at all. Yes, she could have been one of the youngsters from the local schools that her dad taught for free, but Rosie had nothing to do with them. Thank goodness they didn’t press her on whether Alice might have known Natalie.

  One of the detectives made a note. ‘Your mother and father are living together again. Are you reconciled with him too?’

  A deep breath. Keep close to the truth, but don’t get in too deep. For now, that seemed her best option. ‘No, I’ve seen him a few times since his release, for my mother’s sake but, as far as I’m concerned, he was found guilty and admitted his guilt and that’s the end of it.’

  ‘You still think he killed your sister?’

  As if it was that simple. ‘Like I said, he admitted his guilt.’

  They seemed satisfied and left it at that.

  After she closed the door on them she made a cup of tea, her hands trembling so much she spilled almost half of it on the worktop. She wiped it up then sat in the kitchen drinking what was left, until her heartbeat began to return to normal.

  Once Fay was home, she tried to put it all to the back of her mind until she could talk to Oliver. They would have to discuss it properly now. She needed to tell him everything, to see what he thought.

  But as soon as he got in, she knew it was no good. He looked exhausted and hardly spoke while they ate. Fay had him smiling a few times and he insisted on putting her to bed. But when he came down, he collapsed on the sofa, head back, eyes closed.

  Rosie sat beside him and he put his arm round her. ‘What say we go over to France for a look round next week?’ he said. ‘I’m really tired and I’m due some leave.’

  ‘Fay has another week and a half at school. We can’t go till she’s finished.’

  He sat up and turned to face her. ‘Oh, come on. It’ll be a week and a half of wasting time. And we can stay in France for free. That friend of Mum and Dad’s will lend us a place while we’re looking. You and Fay can stay the whole summer.’

  ‘But the school won’t sanction it. They’re very hot on that kind of thing. We can go as soon as term ends. It’s not long, and Fay has parties and things she doesn’t want to miss,’ she said.

  Oliver leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees. ‘You’ve no idea what it’s like at work. The job move was a mistake. It’s not just the travelling. The firm is so old-fashioned. They’re all stuck in their ways and old man Ferguson tries to blame me for anything that goes wrong.’

  ‘I’m sorry,’ she said, rubbing his back. Her voice wobbling on the words. ‘I should have noticed how bad things were for you.’

  He kissed her gently. ‘It has been difficult, but it’s only work. What’s worse is that you seem to have drifted away from me lately.’

  When she looked into his eyes he smiled and whispered, ‘I love you so much.’

  That was what mattered. Oliver loved her and she loved him. Her life was him and Fay. All the rest of it was ancient history. She kissed him again and smoothed his cheek with her hand.

  ‘Let’s go to France as soon as term ends, shall we? Forget everything except you, me, and Fay,’ she said.

  Loretta

  Loretta had the food on before Pearl got home. Shepherd’s pie, a favourite with both the kids, but also something that could sit in the oven for a while without spoiling. She had rung Will and suggested that Dex should come to her for dinner so she could talk to him. Will was happy to bring him over then disappear. ‘He can stay the night with you and come back here in the morning. I’ve spoken to him and he listened, but I’m not sure much of it went in. You might have more luck.’

  When the front door opened, Pearl didn’t call out. She obviously didn’t expect anyone to be home and Loretta listened as her daughter sighed and set off upstairs, her footsteps slow and heavy. She sounded so weary that Loretta felt her throat swell and her voice, when it came, was thick.

  ‘Pearl, baby, I’m in the kitchen.’

  Pearl smiled when she came in and took a deep sniff. ‘Mmm, that smells good. Are you home all evening?’

  Loretta waved her glass of red. ‘What do you think? Dinner’s on and Dex is to be back for the night too. Now stay and talk to me for a minute.’

  Pearl poured herself some orange juice and stood leaning on the worktop, one slim brown leg crossed over the other.

  How beautiful she was.

  ‘What?’ she said.

  ‘I was just thinking how lovely you look. How proud I am to be your mum.’

  Pearl laughed and tossed her hair so that the beads clicked together, not at all abashed, as Loretta would have been at her age. Enjoying the compliment without a trace of false modesty. She bounced down onto a chair with a grin. ‘Well, we know where I get it from, don’t we?’ The smile faded and she crossed her arms. ‘So, come on, Mum – tell.’ Nothing got past her.

  ‘It’s just that things are really hotting up with this case.’

  ‘And?’

  Loretta took her hand. ‘I’ve been so glad to have you here, baby, but I think you should go to Dad’s for the next couple of weeks till all this is sorted. I’ll be doing some late nights. Don’t want to be worrying about you here all alone.’

  ‘Well, I could always ask one or two of my lovers over to keep me company.’ A belly laugh. ‘Your face, Mum. OK, if it makes it easier for you.’ She headed for the stairs. ‘Call me when food’s ready. I’ll ring Dad with the bad news.’

  Ten minutes later she bounced down again. ‘I called Dad and told him I really didn’t want to be away from here.’ Loretta, checking the shepherd’s pie, stopped with the oven door still open. ‘But it’s all right. Dex is missing his own things too and Dad can get to work just as easily from here, so he’ll come over any evening you’re working. He’ll bring his airbed and kip down on Dex’s floor, if you’re going to be away all night. OK?’

  What could she say? ‘Fine, if he’s happy to do that. We’ll have to hope I can wind things up quickly. The airbed’s not going to do your dad’s back any good and I doubt Sandra will be happy with the arrangement.’

  Pearl smiled a wicked little smile as the front door banged open. ‘I’ll tell my baby brother.’ At the door, she looked back. ‘Then I’ll make myself scarce so you can have that heavy mother and son talk, eh?’

  Although she knew she needed a clear head, Loretta refilled her glass as she listened to the hum of their voices in the hall. At least Dexter sounded upbeat. But when he saw her sitting at the table, he put on that surly expression she hated. She forced a smile – keep it light. ‘Hiya, Dex. Shepherd’s pie OK with you?’

  ‘’Spose so.’ He took a can of Coke from the fridge and stood opening it. When the fizz dripped down the side, he licked it off, then gulped down most of the can in a few huge swallows.

  Something about his thin throat, with its oversized Adam’s apple, made Loretta look away, her own throat constricting. ‘Sit down, will you? I can’t talk with you looming over me.’ Everything about him was too big and too clumsy, and she caught a whiff of sweat as he dragged back a chair and sat, making the table shake. ‘I do know what it’s like, Dex, I’ve been there too.’

  ‘Oh, yeah?’ He was determined not to make things easy.

  ‘Yes. You never really knew your grandma, but she was very religious and after my dad died that’s all she was interested in – the church. She was a strict Catholic and, if she wasn’t in there cleaning or doing the flowers, she was helping to organize
parish events.’ Dexter was looking into space; he’d heard all this before. ‘The point is I had no one to talk to and I was the only black girl in my year, one of the few black kids in the school. Like you I got into some fights.’ He was looking at her now. ‘Oh, yes, I did, but I soon realized there was no point. It hurts no one but yourself.’

  He snorted and took a big swallow from his can. ‘Errol was the one who got hurt. I had to show them they couldn’t diss me and get away with it.’ His long lashes fluttered and she remembered how proud she’d been of them when he was little. Always wondered where he got them from.

  ‘This wasn’t the Errol who used to be your mate in the primary, was it?’

  ‘Yeah, but it’s different now, Mum.’

  ‘And you’re not ashamed of hurting him?’

  He moved back and forth in his chair, not looking at her. ‘You don’t understand. I didn’t wanna hurt him, but they wouldn’t stop, they just kept on. Kept on about you.’

  ‘And it’s really nice that you wanted to defend me, but there’s no need, Dex. I’m used to it. It comes with the job.’

  ‘So why do you have to do that job then? Everyone hates the Feds.’ He looked at her with hot eyes. The rash of tiny pimples on his chin and forehead, and the way he tried to control that quavering croak of a voice, made her want to stroke his face and tell him she’d do anything to make him happy.

  ‘I joined the police because I knew there were still some bad people working for them. Some officers who come down on kids, especially black kids, for no reason. But the best way to stop that is for more people like me to join.’

  ‘Dad doesn’t think so.’

  She wasn’t getting into all that. ‘You’ve talked to Dad. What does he say you should do if this kind of bullying happens again?’

  He pushed back his chair and laughed. ‘Tell Mrs Taylor.’

  She laughed too. ‘Like you’re ever going to do that, eh? Anything else?’

  He looked at her, scrubbing his face with his fist. ‘Tell him or tell you before it gets too bad.’

  ‘That’s a good idea. Can you try to do that, if we promise just to talk it through with you?’ Was this doing any good? ‘Or at least talk to Pearl and see what she thinks?’

  ‘OK.’ He threw the can at the swingbin in the corner, smiling at her when it went in.

  Don’t lose it. ‘Will you promise me you’ll think about what I’ve said?’ She had to be content with a nod. ‘Good. And I promise I’ll try to be better at spotting when things aren’t going well for you. But first you’ve got to apologize properly to Errol. Dad and I will be there and we won’t let them blame everything on you.’

  ‘OK, yeah.’ From past experience, she knew that there was no point in going on at him. They’d made peace and Will had said he was behaving well at home. And maybe it would be all right. She knew he was a good kid, deep down.

  When Loretta pulled into the hospital car park early the next morning, she was surprised to see DS Davis’s car. He got out, leaning on his door as he lit a cigarette. ‘How’s things your end, Loretta?’ he said, his voice friendlier than usual.

  ‘Hi, Martin.’ She could be friendly too. ‘We’re still not getting much out of her. Seems in a trance most of the time. Partly the fault of the medication, although they’re saying she’s not on anything too serious now, but I think she’s just cut herself off from it all.’

  ‘Even her own daughter’s murder, eh? Well, I suppose that makes sense if she did it.’

  They walked towards the main entrance. It was a dull morning, not particularly warm and, as Loretta breathed in Davis’s second-hand smoke, she was tempted to ask him for a cigarette. But, no, she was determined to stay off them for Pearl and Dexter.

  At the entrance Davis dropped the fag end and pressed it out with his shoe. ‘Fancy a coffee?’

  ‘OK.’ It made sense to try to work together amicably. Loretta knew that, basically, he was a good copper. She had made sure to tell him everything she’d found out from Joe and Clara right away, and the last time they spoke he had been a bit friendlier. A case like this was a strain on everyone.

  When they were at a table she smiled at him. ‘You’ve found something.’ She spoke softly, although the place was empty.

  ‘Yeah, we’ve finally got hold of Hannah’s so-called confession folder from Pastor Jerome. It wasn’t easy. He was spouting about confidentiality, secrets of the confessional, and God knows what else. But when we applied a bit of pressure he let us have it. And by the way, there’s a whole filing cabinet of these folders in his office. They’re sealed and he says no one ever sees them; he’s no idea what they contain, but I’ve got my doubts about that.’

  Loretta could smell the tobacco on his breath. Oh, she could do with just one drag. ‘What was in Hannah’s folder? Anything new?’

  ‘No. No mention of the father, which is what we were hoping for. She admits to having a baby – “outside wedlock” was the phrase she used – but doesn’t say who with.’

  Loretta sighed. ‘Not much help then?’

  He chuckled. ‘I wouldn’t say that. She also confesses to killing a girl called Alice and describes it just like she did to you.’

  Loretta put down her cup. ‘What?’

  ‘Yep, the whole kit and caboodle. She came in through the French windows and was surprised to find this girl, Alice, in the room. Alice knew she was pregnant, called her names and, when Hannah pushed her away, the girl fell back and hit her head on the marble mantelpiece. She doesn’t mention where this happened, or the fact that she was called Natalie at the time, but otherwise, it fits in completely with what she’s told us.’

  ‘So she really did it?’ Loretta said.

  He nodded. ‘Looks like it. I mean this testament was written thirteen or fourteen years ago, if the pastor is to be believed, and he swears no one has had access to it since.’

  ‘I bet she couldn’t bring herself to admit how violent the attack was, so wrote that she just pushed the girl. And that’s the story she’s been telling herself ever since.’

  Davis took a big swallow of coffee and leaned back with his arms crossed. ‘I’m guessing it started with a push. Maybe the other girl was screaming at her, telling her she was in big trouble, and Hannah/Natalie panicked and hit her with the poker to shut her up. Of course, they never found the poker; so, she probably calmed down enough to get rid of it, which meant there was no link to her that way, and she was often at the house for lessons along with loads of other people – fingerprints and DNA weren’t much use in narrowing down suspects during the original investigation.’

  Loretta nodded. It made sense. ‘I can buy that. But does it get us any closer to Lily’s murderer?’

  ‘The MO is similar. An attack of rage, a murder weapon – this time a stone – that just happened to be at the scene and that we’ve never been able to find.’

  ‘And Lily’s phone has disappeared too.’

  Davis leaned forward. ‘Exactly. I’d say it gets us very close indeed.’

  Joe

  Joe had been at the hospital all morning, feeling bad that he’d been away so long yesterday, but he couldn’t sit there any longer. Had to get out for a bit. The police and the medical staff had all told him he shouldn’t talk any more about the other murder. Or about Lily.

  Dr Patel said Hannah was making good progress and they might be able to discharge her very soon. ‘We’re trying to keep her as calm as possible.’

  She didn’t seem much better to Joe. Mostly they sat in silence except when Hannah started crying again. Then there was nothing he could do. He tried rubbing her shoulder or stroking her fingers, but she didn’t seem to notice. Had gone away from him again.

  He couldn’t face the coffee bar so he headed through the car park towards a pub he knew up the road. It wasn’t a great place, but they did food and chances were it would be quiet at this time of day. After the way the reporters had lurked around at the start he was still wary.

  As he left the h
ospital grounds he saw someone standing at the entrance and lowered his head to hurry by.

  ‘Mr Marsden.’

  He recognized the young voice – Samuel Barnes. ‘Sorry to bother you, Mr Marsden, but I was wondering how she is. Lily’s mum, I mean.’

  He owed the lad and it would be good to talk to someone who had known Lily. ‘She’s out of danger, but still pretty low,’ he said.

  Joe was always a fast walker and Samuel was almost skipping to keep up. ‘And is there any other news? You know, about Lily?’

  They were at the entrance to the pub and Joe said, ‘Look, I’m going in here. Let’s have a drink, shall we?’

  It was bleak enough inside, the dark floorboards sticky, even this early in the evening; but at least they were the only customers, and Joe pointed Samuel to a table in a far corner.

  ‘What’ll you have?’

  ‘It’s all right. I mean, nothing, thank you.’

  He ordered a couple of sandwiches and a bowl of chips – the boy looked half-starved – and brought a pint and a Coke over to the table. The lad stared at his drink as if it was poison.

  ‘It’s just Coke and I can’t sit drinking on my own, so get it down you.’

  Samuel took a gulp. ‘Thank you, sir.’ He turned the glass round and round on the table, adding more sticky rings to the scratched wood.

  ‘Have the police talked to you recently?’ Joe asked.

  ‘Yes, about Lily saying she was close to tracing her biological father.’ Samuel glanced up for a moment, his eyes flickering back to his glass as they met Joe’s gaze. ‘And they keep asking about the argument with her mum.’

  ‘What have you told them?’

  ‘Mrs Marsden was dead against Lily looking for her real dad. Said it would upset you. But Lily didn’t believe that. She thought maybe her mum was ashamed of him. It didn’t matter to Lily what kind of person he was, though. She just wanted to know.’

  Joe nodded, and the boy took another gulp of Coke. ‘That’s when I thought of trying to get hold of her mum’s testament for her.’

  ‘You said they had a fight?’

  ‘Yeah, but that was at the same time as the brethren found out about us meeting on our own. So, I had to stay away. When I did see her, she said they’d had such a big row that she nearly walked out and left home.’