Searching Hearts Box Set: Books 1-5

by St. Clair, Ellie

  The sight as she stripped down to her undergarments was equally breathtaking. She caught his look. “It’s not as if this is something you have not seen before,” she said. “But I will leave on a layer to protect your modesty.”

  She grinned and began to climb up the rock face to the top of the outcropping.

  “Is that safe?” he called up to her. “How do you know if this pool is deep enough to dive?”

  “Because, Captain,” she said. “I have dived off this rock face too many times to count, and explored the depths of this pool.”

  With that, she raised her arms overhead and dove cleanly into the green below, disappearing beneath the surface. She broke through the water, laughing.

  “My, but that feels wonderful. Come, Captain, join me this time.”

  As she walked out of the water, her thin layer of clothing stuck to her skin, and it was all Thomas could do to keep himself from removing that layer as well. He shed his shirt, but left his pants to keep from embarrassing himself as he followed her up the cliff wall. He stood at the top, looking out at the forest below. After she dove in again and cleared the surface, he followed her, the thrill of adrenaline shooting through his veins before the cool water engulfed him.

  He came to the surface with a laugh on his lips, turning his head to find her in the water next to him.

  “You’re a good swimmer, Captain,” she said. “I’ve heard many of the English nobility would drown should they find themselves in this predicament.”

  “There is a lake on my family’s estate,” he explained. “My brothers and I learned how to swim from the groundskeeper and his children. It’s a skill that has served me well, it seems.”

  She began to swim back to the shore when he caught her arm.

  “Eleanor,” his face had a serious quality to it now. “Thank you for bringing me here.”

  “You’re welcome,” she regarded. “You are the first I have shown this place to. In truth, I do not know why I brought you, but I felt it may speak to you as well.”

  He didn’t respond, but pulled her in with one arm, the other holding them above water as his strong legs kicked below. He took her mouth with his, kissing her with building passion and desire. She responded eagerly as she had before, a willing partner of fire as the cool waters lapped around them.

  She groaned and wrapped her arms around his neck to deepen the kiss, her fingers encircling themselves in his hair as her legs wrapped around his waist to bring herself closer to him. He gripped her tighter as they began to slowly slip underwater, her passion overcoming him. She finally broke away as they both came back to the surface for air.

  They swam to shore, but before he could say a word she shushed him, one finger on her lips. He looked at her with question, and she cocked her head over to the right. Grabbing her clothes, she motioned for him to follow her into the brush as she pointed ahead.

  There, children ran through the trees in the distance. They were minimally dressed, and, he realized, inhabitants of this island. They laughed as they jumped over tree roots and followed a well-worn path. Minutes later, their mothers followed, some carrying babies, others foraging along the path as they went.

  When they were well out of sight, he turned to her.

  “Did you know these island were inhabited?”

  “Of course,” she responded. “I had thought they were keeping to the other coast of the island, but perhaps they have moved. We have an understanding. We barter with them, and they allow us to visit the islands now and again, leaving us in peace.”

  “The children, they seem so…” his voice trailed. “Happy.”

  “Of course they are happy,” she said. “Why would they not be?”

  He shook his head, unsure.

  “You must do something for me,” she said quietly.

  “What’s that?”

  “Never tell anyone about this place. About what you’ve found here, about this island. The British, they have a propensity to take over, and I don’t want to be the reason these people would lose their home or their way of life.”

  He slowly nodded, agreeing with her. She wasn’t sure what he would think of that, due to the family he came from and the life he led, but he seemed to understand.

  “Are you hungry?” he asked her. “Perhaps we should eat before heading back to the ship.”

  The thought of returning filled him with dread, but this was an escape, a day away. His life awaited him.

  * * *

  They had dressed and were retracing their steps back to the beach when they both stilled, hearing crashing through the brush approaching behind them.

  “What do you suppose that would be?” he asked her warily.

  “I’m hoping…” she turned as suddenly the wild boar broke through the grasses, approaching them at a fast pace.

  “This is why I need a weapon,” she called to Thomas, who didn’t respond, but pushed her behind him as he calmly stepped in front and neatly killed the boar with a fatal strike of his sword.

  “Well,” she said, impressed. “I didn’t know you had that in you, Harrington.”

  “I didn’t become a captain only because of my family’s connections,” he said, laughing at her incredulity. “Ye of little faith. I do have some skills to my name.”

  She nodded her assent.

  “It’s not the pig’s fault we were here,” he said. “We were trespassers on this land, and I’m sorry he died for it.”

  Was this the same man she had met in the brig just days before? Eleanor wondered to herself. Had she been surprised at his actions, she was incredulous at his depth of feeling for the animal.

  “Well, Captain,” she said. “I can assure you, there are many more where that came from. Shall we not return it with the ship? It will feed many of your crew over the next day or two.”

  He nodded his assent and picked the boar up as they returned to the boat, still where they left it, high on the beach.

  “You know, Harrington,” she said as they rowed back to the ship. “You’re not such a bad sort, for a Navy Captain.”

  He laughed at that. “And you, Eleanor, are not such a bad sort for a pirate.”

  “You enjoyed yourself today, did you not?”

  “I did.”

  “This is what freedom tastes like. This is what piracy affords you — the chance to do as you please, to take breaks from life when you need them. Do you see why I live the life I do? Why we all do?”

  The spell of the day was broken as she brought up the pirate life. He understood what it offered, but there was still the trade off of this life for the lying, the thievery, and the murder that came with it.

  “It’s not worth it, Eleanor,” he responded. “I have morals. I have honor. That, you will never understand.”

  “I understand better than you will ever know,” she said. “Continue for Arenwack Castle. I cannot wait to hear what you find there.”

  Silently assenting, he nodded, and later that evening, chartered the course.

  16

  The nights on the return passed somewhat tortuously for Thomas. Ever the gentleman, he continued to sleep cramped on the window seat. Eleanor thought it was ridiculous considering their previous encounter, but he insisted. Between the window seat and knowing she was lying in his bed just feet away from him, it had been difficult for him to get any sleep, but he refused to touch her again, to take whatever was between them any further, while the gap in the way they lived their lives lay between them.

  Now, Thomas strode through the port at Arwenack Castle, his eyes roving over the street beggars. For once, he’d dispensed with his usual uniform, although it was strange to be walking through the town without his hat. He simply did not command the same respect.

  Clearing his throat, he addressed one of the beggars, who turned lazy eyes on to him.

  “You there, what do you know of Captain Adams?”

  “Captain Adams?” the man replied, his countenance brightening almost immediately. “Is he in port?�
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  Thomas shook his head, registering the disappointment that flickered over the beggar’s face. “Why do you ask?”

  The man frowned and held out his hand. Thomas pulled a crown from his pocket and handed it to him, suddenly aware of just how thin the man was.

  “Captain Adams is good to us,” the man explained, biting down once on the coin with dirty teeth, ensuring that it was genuine. “He shares his wealth with us. No one else helps us except him.”

  Thomas' frown deepened. “He’s a pirate.”

  “And a good one at that,” the man retorted, pocketing the coin. “He always returns with more gold. Who else around here treats us the same way he does? No one. No one cares for us.”

  Thomas shook his head. “That’s probably because many of you would waste their generosity on drink.”

  The man’s face darkened, his dark eyes almost black as he glared at Thomas. A chill washed over him as he took a step back, realizing his error.

  “You know nothing of Captain Adams,” the man sneered, settling back against the wall. “He’ll know if you spend his gifts on drink or on whores. If that be the case, you won’t get another penny from him.”

  “How does he know?” Thomas asked, trying desperately not to believe the man. He gave the man another crown, only for him to cackle with laughter.

  “Captain Adams has eyes and ears everywhere,” he replied, grinning wickedly. “If he don’t want to meet you, then you never will.” Lifting one eyebrow, he stared insolently at Thomas. “And, since you are Captain Harrington, I don’t think Captain Adams will be anywhere near this port. He’ll know you’ve arrived. You are one person he does not want to meet.”

  Thomas turned on his heel and stormed away, hating that, despite his lack of uniform, the man had easily recognized him. Apparently, he could not be invisible here.

  Walking back towards his ship, Thomas stopped between some barrels and tried to get his thoughts in order. What the beggar had told him was a reflection of what Eleanor had told him. There was no way for her to get word to the port, and certainly not to that one specific beggar. Which meant only one thing.

  What Eleanor had said was true.

  Thomas shook his head violently, in an attempt to dispel the thought. He did not want it to be true, for that would change what he had always believed about Captain Adams — and about pirates in general, he supposed. Adams had slowly become less of a brute and more of kind-hearted man right before his eyes, and Thomas hated it, for it meant the past three years had been a senseless pursuit of a good man.

  He did not want to face Eleanor again, not now. He had too much to consider but, given that the ship would be leaving again in the morning, he had very little choice. Besides that, he still had no idea of what to do with her. Thomas made his way out from amongst the barrels and back towards his ship. He would stay on deck for as long as he could before retiring for the night. He just had to hope that Eleanor would be asleep by then.

  Unfortunately for Thomas, it was not to be so.

  * * *

  Eleanor sighed heavily as she sat down at the table, her stomach rumbling. Harrington had been gone for most of the day and she had not had a single thing to eat since breakfast. It was now well past retiring hours and he still had not returned, even though she had heard his voice on deck a few hours ago. She had stared through the window to look at the port, wondering if there was any way to signal for help, but had eventually given up. He had said he would release her, and she believed him, for now at least. Should he not hold true to his promise there would be plenty of opportunity for escape. At the moment, there was still some crew on the deck and she could not exactly simply smash a window and dive out into the water. The chances of her being caught were much too high.

  Finally, the lock turned and Harrington walked in, his eyes widening slightly as he saw her waiting for him.

  “Where have you been?” she demanded, thumping her fist on the table. “Are you intending to starve me to death? I have not eaten for a good many hours!” Attempting to rise, Eleanor had to sit back down in her chair as a wave of weakness washed over her, from hunger as well as sitting in one place for far too long.

  “Sit, please,” Harrington mumbled, rushing to her side and helping her to sit back down carefully. His face was red as he looked down at her, apparently a little alarmed over the lack of color in her face. “I do apologize, Eleanor. I quite forgot and didn’t want to charge any of the crew with coming in here alone. Let me go and fetch you something now.”

  “Fill the plate!” Eleanor replied, hating that she was showing any kind of weakness in front of him. He rushed from the cabin, leaving the door unlocked.

  Eleanor eyed it for a moment, wondering if she should take the opportunity to make her way out on the deck and find a way off the ship.

  She dismissed the thought, as she was far too interested to discover what it was Thomas has found at Arwenack Castle. Had he spoken to someone who had told him of Captain Adams’ generosity? Were his thoughts on pirates changed in the least? And whatever could have taken him so long?

  He was back within a few minutes, a tray of food in his hand as he made his way through the door. Putting it on the table, he glanced at her in surprise. “You didn’t try to escape, then.”

  Eleanor didn’t answer, reaching for a hunk of bread the moment it was put on the table.

  “I thought you would have,” he said, shrugging out of his coat and flinging down his hat onto a chair. Sitting down opposite her, he watched with a slight smile on his face. “That’s the second thing I’ve been surprised about today.”

  Choosing to satisfy her stomach before her many, many questions, Eleanor ate the warm stew, bread and then an apple. Finally, her stomach stopped grumbling and she caught the captain’s eye.

  “What was the first thing?” she asked, watching him carefully. “The first thing you were surprised about?”

  He sighed heavily. “I didn’t want to believe you but you were telling the truth about Captain Adams.”

  Eleanor struggled not to let the triumph she felt show on her face. “I told you so, Harrington.”

  “Thomas, please,” he muttered, glancing away from her.

  Surprised at his sudden willingness to allow her to call him by his first name, Eleanor nodded, running his name over her lips. “Thomas, then.”

  “I don’t understand,” he said softly. “What I learned today goes against everything I know.” He looked up at her. “Why did the Navy force me to seek a gentleman pirate for so long, when I know there are others out there — bloodthirsty, cruel men — who I could have caught instead?”

  Troubled eyes met hers, making her inwardly wince for the struggle he was going through, even though she didn’t want to feel anything for him. There was a vulnerability about him that was beginning to shine through, hidden underneath the layers of Navy training. He was showing himself to be a very different man from the one that had laughed in her face in the brig.

  “You don’t like it here,” Eleanor found herself saying, seeing the confirmation in his eyes. “You want to be free, but the Navy has you bound. Even if you have some freedom now to choose what you will do next, you will always be bound by their laws, their way of life. It’s not the freedom you’ve been searching for.”

  He shook his head, a grimace on his face. “And you think pirating is the answer.”

  It wasn’t a question, more of a statement, but one that Eleanor could not help but agree with. “Your perceptions of a pirate’s life and character have already been changed,” she murmured, tentatively reaching across the table to brush his fingers with hers. “Why not consider your own life?” She felt him start as she touched him, but he did not move his hand away. Without his Navy hat and coat, he seemed more like an ordinary man, one that was struggling with his thoughts and his decisions.

  “You need not be a pirate, Harrington,” she continued, quietly. “Just as my father did not have to be one of the cruel, bloodthirsty pirates
you talk about. You also, however, need not be a Navy captain. Why not buy your own vessel? Hire your own crew? I know you have the wealth to do so, given your background, so why stay here?”

  He did not answer her for a few minutes, simply looking down at her hand where it lay on top of his as though seeing it – and her – for the first time.

  “Honor,” he said, quietly. “My family requires honor. I could not bring scandal.”

  “You have sisters, then? Brothers, perhaps?” she asked, wondering who he was speaking of. “Surely leaving the Navy to seek out your own way of life cannot be too much of a scandal!”

  “I have four siblings. An older brother, a younger brother, and two sisters who are yet unattached,” he replied. “The scandal would still affect them all, in some way.”

  Eleanor barely caught her snort of derision, although she did roll her eyes. “Honor,” she repeated, pushing her chair back and getting to her feet, “can be defined in many ways. It can be living the life your family has chosen for you, sure. Or it can be living the life that is calling to you, one that is worthwhile and betters the lives of others.”

  He remained where he was. “This is all I have,” he said, heavily as sorrow filled his features. “This life is all I know.”

  “Then make a new life!” Eleanor exclaimed, rounding on him with her eyes bright and enthusiasm infused in her voice. “Forget about scandal and do away with propriety! Listen to your heart and make a decision for yourself. That is the only true way to find freedom.”

  She watched him as his face grew a little more open, losing the tension that had ravaged it only a moment before.

  "Think of it," she whispered, perching herself on the table and looking down at him. "Think of the freedom to captain your own ship, the way the wind will chase your sails as you make your way by the stars." She could almost see his body loosening, his eyes growing lighter. "No heavy coat, no proud hat atop your head, you sail where you please and do what you wish. You might not be a pirate, but you are still a captain, free to do as you wish." Without even knowing what she was doing, she reached out and caught his face in her hands, aware of the slight scratch beneath her palms.