Lonely Girl

by Cox, Josephine

  Kathleen was afraid that she was slowing the search down, and she instructed the men, ‘Go after her, the both of you … go now! Apart from a few bruises and scratches, I’m all right. I’ve had a little rest, and now I’m quite capable of getting myself home.’

  Neither Harry nor Patrick was having any of it. Patrick would get Kathleen home safely, and Harry would carry on with the search. ‘And no arguments!’ Patrick laid the law down, and being in some considerable discomfort, and also being increasingly anxious for Rosie, Kathleen gave little argument this time round.

  As the two men helped her up, she leaned on Patrick’s strong arm, still blaming herself for Rosie having fled. ‘I don’t know how else I could have told her,’ she said tearfully. ‘I broke the news about her daddy as gently as I could, and I cuddled her, but she went to pieces. She just scrambled out of the chair and ran! I went after her, but I couldn’t catch her.’ The tears ran down her face. ‘I’m sorry … I am so sorry. She was distraught, and now she’s gone and I’m desperately worried. We must find her! We have to find her!’

  ‘And we will,’ Patrick promised.

  ‘I went as far as I could just now,’ Harry assured his concerned parents, ‘but I’m not giving up. I know she’s hiding up there somewhere, and we will find her, Mum, I promise. Trust us, eh?’

  Patrick nodded. ‘Like you, I’m sure she’s hiding away from us, trying to deal with the terrible news.’

  He helped Kathleen onto flatter ground. ‘Come on then, sweetheart. Whenever you need to rest just tell me.’

  ‘First, I’ll help you get down to the path, Mum, then I’ll be away after Rosie,’ said Harry.

  ‘No.’ Kathleen was adamant. ‘No, son. Leave me. Your dad will get me home all right, and then he’ll be back to help find Rosie. You just mind how you go. All right, son?’

  Harry turned to Patrick. ‘Dad, are you sure you can manage on your own with Mum?’

  ‘We’ll be fine, thanks all the same. You just get off and look for that darling girl … go on!’ Patrick was proud of his only son. It showed in his voice and his face. ‘When I’ve seen to your mother and I know that she’s all right, I’ll be back to help you find Rosie.’

  ‘I can run faster on my own, and I can squeeze into places you can’t. Thanks for the offer, Dad, but I’ll manage,’ Harry told him firmly.

  Harry quickly checked on his stepmother. ‘Are you hurt badly? Have you broken anything, d’you think?’

  Hoisting herself into a sitting position, Kathleen assured them both. ‘No, I don’t think so. I’ll be fine. All I need now is a hot bath, a change of clothing, and young Rosie back with us.’

  Harry agreed. ‘Come on, Dad … I’ll help you get Mum home and then I’ll go and find Rosie.’

  ‘No, son!’ Patrick was adamant. ‘I’ll get your mother home all right. ‘You get after Rosie. She could be hurt. Be careful!’ he warned. ‘Don’t take any silly risks. If she hears you calling, I’m sure she’ll come out of hiding. She trusts you, son, she always has.’

  ‘I won’t come back without her,’ Harry assured them both. ‘If she’s out there, I’ll find her.’

  ‘Thank you, son.’ Kathleen choked back a sob. ‘I’m sorry, I couldn’t stop her. She just ran off. Oh, Harry … she must be feeling so alone, and frightened.’

  Looking up, Kathleen saw that Barney was panting and ready for the off again. ‘Barney will help you. Hurry, son. Go! And be careful.’

  Planting a swift kiss on Kathleen’s cheek, Harry went off at the run, with Barney racing in front, his ears pricked up and his tail wagging with excitement.

  ‘Take me to Rosie!’ Harry urged him. ‘Come on, Barney! She needs us. Find her, boy. Find Rosie!’

  Patrick watched anxiously as the two of them disappeared into the trees.

  Harry briefly paused to look back. When he saw that his father was still watching, he conveyed his assurance by a quick wave of the hand. It was enough. Then he strode quickly on, with Barney running ahead, then running back and barking excitedly. ‘Good boy! Picked up her scent, have you? Come on then, let’s find her.’ And Barney did not need telling twice.

  Trusting in Harry, Patrick quickly returned his attention to Kathleen. ‘If I help you, do you think you could walk, my darling?’

  Kathleen nodded. Her body was hurting, but her determination was strong. ‘I’m not crippled, Patrick, I’m just done in. I always thought I was a fit person, but I have to admit I was really struggling. It was hard going, trying to keep up with Rosie. I can’t even begin to tell you how badly my legs were hurting. I feel so weary, but I’ll be all right. Just get me home, Patrick, and let’s pray that Harry finds that darling girl.’

  Her voice broke with emotion. ‘Oh, Patrick, she took it really badly, as we knew she would. I swear, I did my best to tell her gently …’

  When it seemed her emotions would get the better of her, Patrick made her stop. ‘Here, let’s take a minute, eh?’ He helped her to a grassy bank and eased her down onto a well-padded grass clump. ‘That should be a firm enough landing until you get your breath back.’

  Kathleen was more comfortable sitting there than she had been for a while. Taking a deep, invigorating breath, she thanked him. ‘You’re a good man, Patrick Riley, and I don’t know what I would do without you.’

  ‘Ha! Just let’s hope you won’t ever be without me then, eh?’

  Kathleen hoped for the very same. Feeling somewhat weary of heart and body, she brushed her hands over her face, as though to shut out Rosie’s stricken expression when she had learned the truth. ‘It was awful, Patrick, and strangely, even before I started to explain, it was as though she already knew.’

  ‘How do you mean?’

  Thinking about it now, Kathleen wondered if Patrick had let the bad news slip out while they were in the car. ‘You didn’t mention anything to her, did you, Patrick? I mean, did you accidentally let it slip when you went to fetch her? It was a lot to keep back, I know.’

  He lapsed into deep thought.

  ‘Patrick, please be honest with me. When the two of you were in the car, did you let it slip about her father? Really, I won’t blame you if you did, because I know how persistent Rosie can be when she puts her mind to it.’

  ‘No, Kathleen, hand on heart, I said nothing. Yes, she had a question or two, but please trust me, I did not tell her. As far as I know, the first she heard about John’s untimely death was when she heard it from you.’

  ‘I’m sorry, Patrick.’ Kathleen said, ‘it’s just that … oh, I honestly don’t know! It must have been my imagination, but there was something that told me she had a heavy weight on her mind. It was kind of odd. I really thought she had learned of her father’s death, but then I knew in my heart that you would not have told her … at least not without me being there. And yet I got the feeling that there was something she wanted to tell me, but then didn’t.’

  ‘All I know, my love, is that I was extra careful not to mention anything that could make her curious,’ Patrick assured her. He added cautiously, ‘Are you sure you didn’t imagine she was hiding something? Only you’ve been that worried about having to tell her the shocking news, and what with the responsibility falling on your shoulders, your mind must have been all over the place.’

  ‘No, I swear to you, Patrick, I’m absolutely certain that she had something on her mind … something that was troubling her even before I told her the bad news regarding John.’

  ‘So, if you’re right, what could it have been?’

  ‘I have no idea, but I did feel it was something that she was obviously wary of talking about.’ She choked back the tears. ‘Oh, Patrick, I tried to be gentle, because I knew she would be devastated but even then I sadly underestimated what her response would be.’

  ‘Don’t blame yourself, sweetheart.’ Patrick could see how distressed Kathleen was. ‘We’ll find her, don’t worry.’

  ‘Oh, Patrick! She was in a terrible state. Before I could stop her, she was out of the
chair, and away across the garden. She stopped at the fish pond, sobbing as though her heart would break, and then she was away again. I could hear her crying but I could not get to her. Oh, Patrick, I ran after her as hard as I could. I called for you, but there was so little time. I just needed to go after her and get her back again.’

  Kathleen’s heart was heavy with guilt. ‘I’m sorry, Patrick, I did my best … but in the end the bad news was so overwhelming it was never going to be enough.’

  She buried her head in her hands and sobbed like a child … deep, racking sobs that brought pain to Patrick’s heart.

  He understood, and for a long time he held her tight. ‘I’ve got you, my darling. Trust me, I’m sure young Rosie won’t have gone too far. In the circumstances, it’s understandable that she needed to be on her own for a while. It’s a huge thing for a young girl to take in – that her beloved father is gone.’

  His mind was now cast back over many years. ‘Believe me, I know how it feels. It must be ten times worse when you’re just a young and vulnerable girl like Rosie, with limited experience of life, and no experience of death at all. She won’t get over it in a hurry. We need to allow her to cope with it the best way she can, and if that means running off to think it through on her own, then so be it. Whatever it takes. As long as she stays safe.’

  They moved slowly homeward then before Kathleen voiced another concern. ‘Patrick, I want to keep Rosie here, with us,’ she confided tearfully.

  ‘In what way?’ He did not fully understand.

  ‘I want her to stay here with us, for as long as she needs to,’ Kathleen explained. ‘The thing is, Molly said she was asked to give an account of the accident, so we have no idea how long she might be kept at the police station. Meantime, what about Rosie? There is no one else close enough to keep an eye on her except us. And should she even be going home just yet anyway, with her father not being there and her mother giving not an ounce of love or support?’

  Her fears for Rosie were now multiplying tenfold. ‘Rosie needs us, Patrick. You must see that. You do, don’t you?’

  ‘Yes, of course I do, my love, and you’re right. It would be far too much of an ordeal to take Rosie home just yet. I only hope Molly can see it that way. You know what she’s like. If she wants Rosie there, it will be the devil of a thing for us to change her mind.’

  ‘That’s true!’ Growing ever more anxious, Kathleen paused to take a breath. ‘I’m sorry, Patrick,’ she shook her head, ‘I just need a minute to think it through.’

  ‘Of course. But don’t try to deal with this on your own. First of all, you know what Molly’s like. She will try anything to stop us from looking after Rosie, just to be awkward. And, besides, you’ve been through a bit of an ordeal yourself. I don’t want you tiring yourself out. Be quiet now, eh? There will be time to talk when you’re properly rested. We’re only minutes away from home.’

  They walked on slowly, but Kathleen had so much to discuss with him that would not wait. ‘With regards to Rosie, Molly has never once felt a single ounce of love for the girl. She never wanted her and, as we both know, she never will. But if she thought it would be good for Rosie to stay with us for a few weeks, she would go out on a limb to stop it from happening, just to be spiteful. So, how will we manage to persuade her about keeping Rosie with us for a while? At least until after the funeral.’

  ‘Well, I reckon there might be one way of persuading her.’

  ‘Oh, and how’s that, then?’

  ‘Much as I never thought to say this, Kathleen, just this once maybe we could ask Molly to stay over as well.’ He had not meant to get drawn into further conversation just now, but because his dear wife was so persistent he felt he had no choice but to answer.

  Kathleen, though, was not convinced about his solution. ‘The thing is, Patrick, why would she want to be here with you and me? She doesn’t even like us, for whatever reason. And, as we all know, she cares nothing for Rosie.’

  ‘There might be another reason why she wouldn’t want us to have Rosie with us on her own.’

  ‘Oh?’

  ‘Just think about it, Kathleen. If Rosie agrees to come and stay with us for a time, Molly would be constantly wondering if she might be telling us things that Molly doesn’t want us to know.’

  ‘Such as what? I think we already know enough of Molly’s dark antics.’

  Patrick hunched his shoulders. ‘That may or may not be the case, I don’t know. But I bet you young Rosie has seen and heard many things – bad things – that we don’t know about, and that she would normally never divulge to us or anyone else. Especially to anyone else! We know young Rosie is not one to gossip, but Molly may not trust her. Now do you see what I’m getting at?’

  Kathleen was beginning to understand. ‘Yes, you could be right. Molly might be afraid to leave her here with us in case she lets a few nasty tales out of the bag. Lord knows what Rosie must have heard and seen over the years. Probably enough to fuel the local gossips for months.’

  ‘That’s it. And even if Rosie had not seen or heard anything untoward, Molly could not be certain about that. Molly has a lot to answer for where Rosie is concerned. If ever any tales got out, who’s to say what mischief could be stirred up? Rosie may well see and hear far worse things than we know about. Then again, she may not, but I wouldn’t care to bet on that.’

  Patrick shook his head. ‘I would not like to think too deeply about the shameful things Molly might have got up to behind John’s back.’

  ‘Like what, for instance?’

  ‘Well, we both know she likes the men. We’ve seen her flirting with anything in trousers. So, who’s to say she hasn’t had more than one shameful fling over the years, particularly when John’s been busy with the harvest for days on end, or down at the cattle market?’

  ‘You’re absolutely right! And there have been many times when John’s been away overnight, when he’s travelled miles to collect a new brood mare, or when he’s stayed out all night watching for poachers. Other times, he’s been away shifting cattle to faraway markets.’

  Kathleen stopped for a rest. ‘Phew! I feel worn out,’ she gasped. ‘It’s all this talk of having Molly under our roof. It doesn’t bear thinking about.’

  ‘It’s not the talking,’ Patrick informed her sternly, ‘it’s the effort of walking all this way and talking at the same time. Now take it easy.’

  As they came into the garden, Kathleen paused to lean on the ornamental stone wall. ‘Yes, you’re right,’ she muttered. ‘I’m not as fit as I would like to be, but it’s not the climbing and sliding over rough ground that’s proving a bit heavy, it’s too many biscuits and home-made fruitcakes.’

  ‘Come on, you.’ Patrick helped her up to the patio. ‘You’re tired out, what with this business about Molly and whether or not she might try and stop us from having Rosie here with us.’

  ‘Do you know what, Patrick? I’ve been thinking about it, and yes, Molly could well have grabbed the opportunity to take a number of lovers to her bed. It’s possible that Rosie saw some of that. I mean, we can’t deny that my sister is a good-looking woman, so what man would ever refuse her advances? Even in her adolescence Molly had boys making fools of themselves over her, and she just loved the attention. Sometimes she’d be stringing two or three along at the same time!’

  Patrick was not surprised to hear this. ‘Well, there you have it, my darling. If we want Rosie to come and stay with us, it seems to me that we will need to invite the dreaded Molly as well in order to stop her causing any aggravation. So, what do you think?’

  ‘I believe she could be a burden, although she might accept our offer – if only to keep a wary eye on Rosie. Then again, she could refuse for us to have Rosie, and there is not a thing we could do about it. But would she abuse Rosie if we were not allowed to have her – if she stayed with her mother at the farm?’

  ‘Ah, Molly is likely to take the opportunity to indulge herself with any foolish man who yearns to spend a night
or so with her. She just might allow Rosie to come and stay with us, if only so the child knows nothing of what dirty little games Molly is up to.’

  ‘Sadly, what you say is very true.’

  Taking her on into the house, Patrick led Kathleen down to the parlour, where he sat her in the chair before going to put the kettle on. ‘Shout if you need me,’ he told her as he went, ‘but don’t move from there. Just call out my name, and I’ll come running.’ He smiled at a special memory. ‘Hey, cast your mind back … wasn’t there a song title something like that?’

  ‘Yes, and I recall that at one time you never stopped singing it. Drove me mad, it did, especially when you’ve got a voice like sandpaper on metal.’

  ‘Aw, that’s cruel.’

  Kathleen had more important matters on her mind, although she realised Patrick was trying to cheer her up and take her mind off the present crisis. ‘Look, Patrick,’ she called, raising her voice as he pottered into the kitchen, ‘let’s get back to the question in hand.’

  ‘Of course. Sorry, sweetheart, but I reckon we’ve both come to the same decision: to ask Molly if we can have Rosie for a time and invite Molly, too. As you point out, Molly will probably refuse in favour of having the run of the farm – just herself and some fancy man.’

  ‘Absolutely! But if in the end we land up with Molly as well as Rosie, then, what is it they say: keep your friends close and your enemies closer, or something of that sort? All the same, Patrick, I can’t imagine Molly under our roof. God help us all!’

  ‘But if it’s the only way …’ he called back.

  He returned with a small tray laid with a plate of biscuits and two cups of tea. ‘There we are! Get that down you, and I’ll run you a bath. Ease your bones, it will.’

  ‘Thanks, love, but I’m not useless, I can run my own bath, thank you. And, anyway, Harry will be waiting for you.’

  ‘I don’t think so, and don’t argue. Like he says, he can run faster than I can, and he’s more able to squeeze into spaces I might get stuck in. I’ll see to you first, my darling, then I’m off to do my best for Harry and Rosie.’