The Wind From Hastings

by Morgan Llywelyn

  “But you never discuss her with me!”

  He stared at me. “You would prefer it if I did? By God, you are a strange woman!”

  “No! I do not want you to talk about her! I do not want you even to see her! I … I don’t know what I want …” I trailed off miserably, sorry for having started the whole thing.

  “I tell you this for the last time, Aldith, because I have neither the desire nor the energy to waste on women’s foolishness. I need you, here, now, with me. You are strong; perhaps you do not know how strong yourself. But as long as I hold England, I need all the strength I can muster to stand beside me. The woman you speak of was my love from our childhood; good she has been to me, and true, but hers is not a strength like yours. She leans, like a vine upon a wall, and in some times and circumstances that is charming. But if the wall is taken away the vine falls down.

  “Without support you continue to stand, Aldith, and I count on that more than you know. Now be done with this and do not speak of it to me again!”

  He strode away, his shoulders rigid with inheld anger, and left me mortally confused as to my own feelings.

  Heard at first hand, it appeared that Tostig had indeed come well prepared to do damage to his homeland. Thirty ships had comprised his fleet, including some of the Viking longships I remembered from the harbor at Dublin. A scattered few manor houses stood on the island; these Tostig had robbed and put to the torch. As soon as he had stripped the land of booty, he set sail again and began his ravaging of the coastline.

  The King was most deeply angered by the fact that, in Sandwich, Tostig had gained additional men through bribe or threat. Good Kentish seamen had added their ships to his fleet and sailed northward with him; when Harold heard of this his heart hardened against his brother forever.

  Gyrth was livid with rage, and Leofwine, whose earldom was Kent, wanted to put Tostig to the sword himself. “I feel like a maiden raped by my own brother!” he swore whenever the defection of the Kentish ships was mentioned.

  “He thought the south country would support him,” Harold commented bitterly. “This was our father’s land, and Tostig thought his popularity here might outweigh mine. The dreaming fool! Thirteen years have I been Earl of Wessex, thirteen years have I cared for and courted these people! No brother of mine can wrest from me a love I have fought for and won!”

  Gyrth’s face flamed when Harold spoke those words in the hall of our house. I know not if Harold noticed or interpreted rightly his younger brother’s discomfiture, but from that time on I became aware that the King placed his trust in no man save himself and Wulfstan.

  And, strangely, in me. In the dark hours of the night we lay untouching while he poured out a recital of the day’s doings and the morrow’s plans. I listened without comment or criticism, and I repeated nothing of what I heard to anyone, ever.

  Afterward, unburdened, the King slept deeply and without dreams. Sometimes in the night he laid his hand on my hip, lightly.

  Even as the business of war progressed, so did the business of nature. Since Thorney, Harold had not embraced me with passion, all his energies being directed elsewhere, but the First Lady has no privacy. Almost before I was aware of it myself, my ladies-in-waiting had commented on the cessation of my menses. “You were due a fortnight ago, my lady!” Gwladys chattered excitedly. “Have you yet told the King?”

  “There is nothing certain to tell him, woman! I just made a long journey; it is only natural for me to be disarranged in my person.”

  “You never are!”

  “Well, this is the first time, then! Let it be, Gwladys.”

  But she was right, of course. Even though I did not want to admit it to myself—it seemed such a profanation of the body that had belonged to Griffith—I was aware that I carried a child within me. Three had I borne; I knew the signs.

  Gwladys did not believe my denial. She was very upnosed at having such privy knowledge, and I knew she would not be able to keep the secret long. I would have to tell the King before he heard of it roundabout. But I felt a woman’s desire to pick just the right time.

  It fell nicely into my lap, a gift, strangely enough, from my brothers! Couriers came from the North with great news: Tostig and his treasonous fleet had put into the mouth of the Burnham River in Norfolk, pillaging the countryside; then when they wore out their well come they sailed on to the Humber. But there they were met by Earl Edwin and a militia from Lindsey! Driven back aboard their ships, they made hasty sail for York, only to be met by Morkere and the Northumbrians.

  All this armed resistance was too much for the Kentishmen; they deserted and took their ships drag-tailed home. With his fleet reduced to twelve vessels and all his flags in disarray, Tostig beat a retreat for Scotland, and the north country was deemed secure once more.

  “The earls of Leofric’s line have proven themselves in battle!” Harold exulted in the hall. “Your family does you proud, Aldith! It was a good connection that I made there!”

  My sense of humor was never besung by the bards in the hall at Rhuddlan, but I could not help enjoying a little play on words. “You have made another good connection with my family, my lord,” I murmured with downcast eyes and secret smile. “And methinks it has borne fruit.”

  The King was no lackwit; he took my meaning instantly and his eyes blazed. “You are pregnant?”

  “Yes, Your Grace.” The joy I saw on his face was so beautiful that at that moment I did not begrudge him the use of my body.

  “Oh, my love, you carry the Atheling!” He grasped my hands and pulled me off my stool, spinning me around him in a funny little dance totally lacking in kingly dignity. It was the first time I had ever heard him call me his love, and it quite shocked me. Again I was confused as to my feelings, and the spinning we were doing did not clear my head.

  “Please, Your Grace, I am dizzy!”

  “Oh, of course. I’m sorry, Aldith! Here, sit; bring wine for my Lady at once! Where is your maid; I’ll have her come care for you immediately!” Harold fussed over me in a way that would have gladdened any woman’s heart; it was impossible not to share his obvious delight. He insisted that the entire court be assembled straightway, even the officers of the fyrd, and the announcement made without delay.

  “You will bear me a son, Aldith, I know it!” he exulted. “There will be no more of this tossing the crown into the air to see who catches it. The succession will be safe for my son, and the kingdom will rest united!”

  It was impossible not to be swept up by such enthusiasm. Wales was being stripped from me, layer by layer, like a pearl soaked in vinegar, and daily I became more involved with England. Now I carried it within me. The Atheling, the Prince: the heir to the throne.

  As my son Llywelyn should have been heir to Wales.

  Pregnancy makes me happy. It puts a little wall around me that softens noises and brightens colors. This pregnancy dulled at last the pain of Griffith’s loss and made me accept my new life even if it could not make me love my husband. But I felt easy in my skin, and my thoughts turned glowingly on the little being curled within me.

  A new baby to hold. New, soft, toothless gums mumbling at my breast, for I would raise this child myself! I would allow no nurse; I had come to feel that each life was too precious to entrust to others. With that came a new desire to have my other children gathered about me; I hungered for my sons, and my daughter sitting warn on my lap.

  I spoke of it to the King.

  “If it would make you happy, Aldith, we will send for them soon. We shall not be going back to London, not for a while; if an invasion comes from Normandy; as I think it must, it will come here, and I must be here and ready.”

  “Would you send me to safekeeping with them?”

  “No! I feel that you are safest right here, with me. There is no man I trust this day sufficiently to guard my son, save only myself.”

  “Osbert is faithful,” I reminded him.

  Harold’s eyes twinkled. “I suspect Osbert has switched
his allegiances somewhat, though I do not complain of it. His loyalty seems more to you than to me these days, and I am glad to see it; he is your complete conquest, Aldith, and I know he would not dishonor either one of us. But I trust the strength of my own right arm even more. You will stay with me, and as soon as I can spare a sufficient troop I will send for the children.”

  At night I sat naked on my bed, watching the swell of my belly and waiting for that first flutter of movement that signals new life inside. It was too soon, but I was eager; that little foot or elbow striking outward against my belly always gave me a thrill I cannot explain. Bishops speak of seeing saints; my most holy moment is that first signal from a new person.

  The heat of the summer came and swelled around us, even as I ripened. At last my children came. With Osbert in stern and watchful attendance, the four of us went for long walks or stood in the summer wind at the coastline and watched the preparations of the burgeoning English fleet. The King had taken command of it himself, and we often caught a glimpse of his royal purple cloak flashing on one deck or another.

  Rhodri was thrilled by the panoply of war. Osbert made him a little toy sword of wood, and he marched up and down with it, waving it in the air and making savage threats. When he came near to putting out his sister’s eye, I took the thing away from him and broke it across my knee, which caused such a commotion that I boxed Rhodri’s ears and sent the lot of them back to the hall.

  Finding myself totally alone for once, I stood at the edge of the land and looked across the limitless sea. Somewhere over there was another fleet, other men preparing to kill, and other children, doubtless, playing at it.

  I stood with my face toward Normandy and an innocent life cradled within me, and I wondered aloud if God felt as I did about the whole affair.

  Even as I saw the tide come rushing in that summer day, the waves tumbling over one another in their eagerness to reach the shore, events were rushing forward too. Even then it must have been beyond control; we were sliding down an icy hill we did not even see, and the momentum grew greater with each passing day.

  By the first of September, the King and his advisers had decided there was no further danger of an invasion from Normandy that year. Soon the storms of autumn would render the crossing unsafe; besides, the English fyrd was exhausted with their long and futile watch and anxious to be home, harvesting the crops they had barely planted when they were summoned.

  In private, in our dark and secret world, Harold confessed some misgivings. “I do not like disbanding the fyrd and leaving the coast unguarded, Aldith, but I cannot keep the men here to no purpose. Sooner or later I would have mutiny. While I still have the goodwill of every shireman and yeoman I must send them to their homes for the winter, and trust that in the spring they will not have forgotten the arts of war I drilled into them in this place.”

  Rather than subject me to an overland trip, Harold arranged that I return to London with him on his flagship. The seas still seemed calm when we set sail with the rest of the fleet, but before we reached Dover Strait a terrible wind came up and the sky turned black. How proud I was of the children then! Even little Nesta did not cry or hide her face in my skirts; she rode the pitching deck like a little sailor on her two small legs and laughed. We beat through the storm and made safe harbor without misfortune; my good sea-belly was not even affected by pregnancy, and I heard Harold boasting of it afterward.

  But some of his ships were not so fortunate. Some of the supply ships foundered and were sunk, and as night fell a mast broke on a troop carrier and it lost control, eventually ramming another ship, with a goodly loss of men.

  Weary and sick at heart over the losses, we reached Thorney Palace at last, anxious for a hot meal and our beds. The days at sea had been a great adventure for the children, but I was depressed by all the needless death and yearned for a quiet time away from the sight of water. I longed for the winter of peace that lay ahead and the birth of my baby.

  FULFORD

  IT BEGAN WITH the splash of horses ridden at a gallop through the shallow crossing and a courier’s hoarse cry: “Message for the King! Urgent message for the King!”

  Gwladys and I were in the solar, consulting with the court herbalist about a tonic to reduce the slight swelling in my ankles. The herbalist recommended tea of comfrey; Gwladys held out for boiled sassafras and poultices of witch hazel. The matter was not yet resolved, and tempers, not tea, were coming to the boil, when an urgency of trumpets rang through the palace. I left them to their medicaments and hastened to the hall.

  The King stood before his High Seat, Ansgar below him and Stigand hovering close, quick to scent trouble. Reeves and officials crowded the hall, all listening tensely to the courier’s news.

  “It is the Norwegian King, Harald Hardraada, Your Grace! He has brought a whole fleet, sailing before the north wind, and they have already attacked Cleveland and Scarborough!”

  Harold’s face was grim, that muscle clenching in his jaw again. “We have some ships in the northern waters; were they unable to prevent this?”

  The courier shook his head. “They were too few, Your Grace, and the Norseman has a whole invasion fleet! Nothing has been able to withstand him; he has entered the Humber and this very day may lie at anchor at Riccall, ten miles from York by road.”

  A horrified buzz ran through the hall. The suddenness of the attack was numbing; for so many months all thought and expectation had been centered on William of Normandy, it was as if the others who desired to control England had ceased to exist. But they had not, obviously. The greatest danger had not come from the South at all.

  York! I pressed forward to stand with the King and face the courier, feeling a quick pity for his frightened face and travel-stained garments. “My brothers, the earls Edwin and Morkere—what of them?”

  He shook his head again, and his eyes would not meet mine. “They are raising their troops, I know, but I cannot say how it goes with them.”

  “They drove Tostig from the country!”

  Harold’s voice cut in. “Harald Hardraada is not Tostig. He will not have embarked upon this thing ill prepared, and his men will not desert him in the pitch of battle. Mercia and Northumbria fought well before, but they cannot stand against Hardraada without aid!”

  Stigand was white-faced. “Even now it may be too late, Your Grace!”

  The King cut him with an icy stare. “It shall not be! Ansgar! We will leave at once! Give the orders for a forced march; we will attract such additional fighting men as we can along the way.” His words were clipped and spare, his mind already sharp with generalship. He turned once more to the courier. “Are there others following you, bringing news?”

  “Oh, yes, Your Grace!”

  “Good, we shall encounter them on the road as we go. Hasten, everyone, each minute is precious. We will not sleep tonight on Thorney Island!”

  Incredibly, that was true. By sundown every man who could be impressed into service was armed and provisioned, and reeves had ridden into London to draw more from their shops and houses. While the horses for the King’s party were being assembled outside the stables another courier arrived, on a horse whose trembling legs had literally run it to death.

  “The ships of Lord Tostig have come from Scotland and joined the fleet of Hardraada!” was the dire news the horse had been sacrificed to bring us.

  I saw death in the King’s face then. He strode to our chamber to finish dressing for the march, and I followed him on shaky knees, knowing that whatever happened now was in God’s hands alone.

  “They attack me on every side, Aldith,” he said sadly as Sweyn Walleye fastened the King’s heavy leather belt over his fine wool tunic. “I do not fear the Norwegian giant, but I wish to God my own brother did not stand with him!”

  “You cannot kill him, my son!” rang a voice from the passageway. In another moment Gytha herself burst in upon us, come hotfoot from her own apartments.

  “Madam,” the King began patiently, “we h
ave discussed this before. When Tostig conspired with your daughter to murder an honored guest at court, he put himself beyond the pale and sacrificed his rights in this kingdom. Now that the kingdom is in my keeping, I must consider him as its enemy, not as my brother. He would destroy us all if he could; I fear his reason has become unhinged with greed and bitterness. I would have slain him had I caught him at Sandwich, with the blood of innocent townsfolk on his hands, and I will slay him in Northumbria if he fights with Harald Hardraada!”

  “This is your doing!” Gytha whirled on me suddenly. “Before my son met you he had strong filial feelings; he did not hold blood ties so lightly! Now he no longer listens to my counsel. He has put aside my dear grandchildren as well as their mother, she who was like a daughter to me …”

  “It was you who reminded me often enough that her blood was too humble for marriage!” Harold’s temper was roused and redirected; I had never thought to see him turn on his mother as he did then. “I married a noblewoman, as you oft advised me, Mother, and you have never liked her for it! Your judgment is as rotten as Tostig’s, and for all I know the treachery and madness in him were a birthright from you! I am your sovereign, madam, and I will not have you come to my privy chamber and attempt to dictate to me! I will call an escort if I must to take you back to your apartments. I have no time for this!”

  Gytha drew herself up with haughty, withered dignity, gave me one look that simmered with poison, and stalked out.

  Harold looked after her somberly and then turned to me. “I will not see you again until this is resolved, Aldith. It is not possible to take a woman on a forced march like this, particularly a woman great with child. Much as I want you close to me, I shall have to leave you here, as I leave my brother Leofwine to manage the affairs of state until I return.”

  He looked deeply into my eyes. “Are you frightened for me, Aldith, or is that trembling lip for your valiant brothers?”

  I bit it to keep it still. “I like none of this, my lord! It seems so sudden; we are all so unprepared!”