"You okay for the moment? Up to talking? Because in the meantime, Ben, we have a hell of a hornet's nest to deal with here. And the sooner we get moving, the better."
Ben drew a deep breath, squared his shoulders and nodded. "Let's get to it, then."
Elliot lowered the tailgate on the pickup and used it as a seat. Wes pulled up a bale of hay and settled there.
"Tell me what we need to do, Garrett," Ben said softly.
"First we go ahead with the exhumation. We have to find out who's in that grave. They might have family, too, somewhere. I'll see to that myself. Then there's the matter of Penny's little crime spree."
"I'll pay the dealer for the use of the car. Hell, I'll buy it if he wants. Give him more than he's asking," Ben said.
"He'll probably go along with that. And I imagine the hotel in El Paso will drop the charges if we explain things and settle up with them. The stolen credit card, though…" Garrett shook his head. "See, there's more to that. The owner of that card has come up missing."
Ben's head came up fast.
"She was a nurse," Garrett said. "From England. The good news is, the police know Penny was here in the States before the woman vanished. Bad news is, they still think she might know something about it."
"They'll want to question her, then," Ben said softly. He shook his head. "You know I'm not gonna allow it, Garrett. She's sick. I have to take care of her."
Garrett nodded. "I'll put them off as long as I can, Ben."
"Good Lord, what in the world has that wife of yours been up to?" Wes asked.
Ben shook his head, realizing this was the first Wes had heard of Penny's crimes. "Long story, and I don't know half of it."
"Kirsten will know," Adam said. He'd been leaning against the pickup, but he straightened now and that old grimness was back in his eyes—always was when Kirsten's name came up. "It's high time she get over here and answer a few questions."
Garrett put a hand on Adam's shoulder. "I'll call her. You're still too angry. But not today. We have enough on our plate without adding another course just yet. Meanwhile, Ben, don't you think we oughta have Doc come by and take a look at Penny? After all she's been through … and given her condition and all…"
Ben shook his head. "She's dead against it. Threatened to take off if I tried to push the issue. Which makes me all the more curious about that clinic in England. What the hell happened to her there that left her like this? I'm telling you, Garrett, when I suggested she see a doctor, she went white. She was scared. Hiding it, like she always did, but scared."
Garrett nodded. "Take it slow with her, Ben. If you can get her to tell you any more about the place, maybe I can have it checked out." His eyes were sympathetic and worried. "We'll get to the bottom of this. I promise you that."
Wes nodded. "In a few days, when she's more comfortable, maybe she'll reconsider about letting Doc take a look at her. Hell, he delivered her."
Ben nodded. "And he was with her parents when they died." He lowered his head. "Tough to believe she doesn't even remember them. Or me." Drawing a deep breath, he went on. "I'll convince her to see Doc, though. Don't see that I have much choice about that."
"And you'll tell her about her condition…" Garrett prompted.
Ben met his brother's eyes, set his jaw. "Not until Doc sees her and confirms it." Garrett frowned, but Ben held his gaze. "I can't do it to her, dammit. Not yet. Jesus, let's give her a few days of peace before we tear her world apart all over again."
Garrett held up a hand in surrender. "All right, okay, we'll keep quiet until you decide to tell her. But don't wait too long, Ben. She has a right to know."
"Damn, this is hard." Ben shook his head slowly. "I want to hold her, touch her … but I have to keep reminding myself that as far as she's concerned, I'm a stranger."
His brothers nodded. And he knew that Garrett and Wes, at least, could understand. They had wives they adored. The thought of losing them, then getting them back only to realize they really were still beyond their reach—that was one they could sympathize with. "I have her back for a little while," he said softly. "But I don't. Not really."
"One step at a time, Ben. Just hold on, okay? Hold on to us," Adam told him.
Ben nodded. If there was one thing he could count on, it was his family. They'd be holding him up right to the end. No matter what.
"I'm going to head into the office," Garrett said. "Get started on straightening out her legal problems. Gotta get them moving again on that exhumation, too. I'll let you know what I find out."
"Thanks, Garrett," Ben told him.
"Elliot and I can handle your classes for today, if you want," Adam offered. "Not that we know spit about martial arts, but—"
Ben pressed a palm to his forehead. "I forgot all about the kids." He glanced at his watch. "I have three groups today. The older kids come in from ten to noon, then the middle schoolers after lunch from one to three, and the toddler class from three to five."
"We can handle it," Elliot said. "We'll just tell them to do whatever it was they did last time." He looked at his watch as well. "Heck, Adam, we just about have time to get there."
Adam nodded, squeezed Ben's shoulder and turned toward his shiny black sports car that looked as out of place on the ranch as an Armani suit in the stables. Everyone had his own personal theory as to why Adam had driven the car down instead of flying in from New York. And every one of them involved Kirsten and the rich man she'd married.
"Taylor and I can handle the chores around the ranch today," Wes said. "Take your time in town, Garrett. Do what needs doing and don't worry about things here."
Garrett nodded. "You okay, Ben?"
"No," Ben said. "But I'll manage." He looked toward the house, half eager to go inside, half afraid to.
Wes nodded. "I know," he said. "But I remember a time not too long ago when you told me you'd give your right arm for another chance with Penny. Now you have it, Ben, even if it is only for a little while. Not many men get that kind of miracle."
Ben nodded. His brother was right. He had to make this work, make her remember, make everything the way it was before and make the most of every minute he had left with her. He had to.
* * *
Chapter 5
« ^ »
Chelsea led her through a sprawling house, where every room seemed like a big, inviting haven. She glimpsed a large kitchen and a formal dining room, but the living room was her favorite. Open and wide, with broad windows that were uncovered to reveal the lush, rolling fields beyond. A huge fireplace took up a third of one wall, and the furniture was overstuffed and comfortable. A braided oval rug covered most of the floor, and a hound dog who looked like his coat needed ironing lifted one eyebrow as she passed.
"He … won't hurt Olive, will he?" Penny asked.
Chelsea grinned. "He can barely work up the energy to hurt his food at mealtime. I think your pup is safe. Ol' Blue never hurt a flea."
She led Penny to an old-fashioned, steep staircase and started up it. "There's more to see downstairs," she said. "There's a den, and an office down there, plus the bath. But I thought you'd rather get upstairs where you can be alone and try to digest all of this."
"I appreciate that," Penny said.
Chelsea led her to a bedroom at the end of the hall and opened the door with a flourish. Penny saw pink. Pink patterns in the wallpaper, and pink lacy curtains to match the pink bedspread.
"This was Jessi's room before she married Lash and moved into town. She hated all the pink, but she never had the heart to tell her brothers."
"They decorated it for her?"
Chelsea nodded. "They're sweet underneath all that macho they wear with their hats. Really."
Penny thought she'd reserve judgment on that. But they certainly seemed sweet so far. She sighed and walked to the row of windows that overlooked the barn and stable, and closer, the cluster of Brand men gathered in the driveway around a pickup truck that seemed to be their focal point. Ben glan
ced up as she looked down, and their eyes met. Something shivered down her spine, right to her toes, and she quickly turned away.
"It's better than white," she said, picking up the thread of the conversation. "In the clinic everything was white."
Chelsea gently touched her arm. "It must have been awful for you."
Shrugging, Penny scanned the kind woman's face. "I wasn't awake long enough for it to be awful," she said. And she reminded herself that Chelsea was not a suspect here. She couldn't have been involved in whatever scheme had resulted in the mess she now had for a life. "Chelsea … do they talk about me much?"
Chelsea frowned a little, but sat down on the edge of the bed and patted a spot beside her. She waited until Penny joined her there to begin speaking. "You were loved here," she said. "That's pretty obvious to me. Every time anyone brings your name up, it's usually with a teary smile. With everyone except Ben, that is."
Penny lifted her gaze. "Ben doesn't talk about me?"
"Ben doesn't smile. He's probably the saddest man I've ever known, Penny. He never got over losing you."
A little lead ball formed in Penny's stomach. She tried to ignore it, but it only got bigger.
Chelsea clasped her hand. "But you're back now."
And Penny shook her head. "Not really. I mean, I'm back … but I'm not the woman he's been mourning all this time." She closed her eyes and wondered why she felt so much regret when she said that. As if she might want to be that woman … the woman Ben Brand loved. Imagine that. And it was a stupid way to feel, since for all she knew he might have been involved in her disappearance.
She sighed heavily and shook her head. "I think I'd like to be alone for a little while."
"Sure," Chelsea said, and squeezed her hand. "If you feel like talking later, you just say the word. For now, it's understandable you needing some time to yourself. I'll make everyone leave you alone."
Penny nodded her thanks.
"I'll bring you up some tea in a few minutes. You just call me if you need anything else, okay?"
"You don't need to wait on me, Chelsea."
"Indulge me," she said with a wink.
Chelsea left then, and Penny returned to the windows, parting the lace curtains to stare once more down at the men gathered below. The Brand brothers sat or leaned or stood around Ben. Talking about her, no doubt. Ben seemed tortured. And she couldn't believe the stunning impact of seeing him in so much pain. Maybe because it was such a contradiction. Such a big, powerful man—his denim shirt straining across the expanse of his shoulders—looking so wounded. She felt badly for him. If he'd really loved her once … it must be hard for him now. Seeing how different she was. It was obvious she was not the woman he remembered.
And if she'd really loved him…
Had she? Had she ever looked up into his eyes the way she'd seen Chelsea look into Garrett's today? Had she slept curled up snug in Ben's arms? Made love to him?
A lonely pain writhed in her stomach, and her headache worsened. What must that have been like? To hold such a man inside her? To be that close to him?
He was a beautiful man. Hair like old corn silk, long and untamed. Blue eyes as deep and sad as the ocean.
She had to turn away, because staring down at him caused an unidentifiable pain in her belly, in her heart. How could she forget being with a man like Ben Brand? How?
Sighing, she spun around and collapsed on the bed. And she lay there for several minutes, waiting for her pounding headache to ease.
There was a gentle knock on her door, and she turned, expecting to see Chelsea with her tea. Instead she saw Olive, cleaner than she'd ever seen her. Her fur was actually white now, and she had a brown spot on her backside that Penny had never noticed before. As Penny got up, Olive looked across the room at her, then raced forward, stubby legs flying, and launched herself. Penny crouched down and gathered the little dog close, nearly toppling backward from the impact, but hugging her all the same, wet fur and all. It was only as Olive kissed her face that she heard the deep laughter from the doorway and looked up to see Ben standing there. Though he was amused, he came forward quickly to ease the dog from her arms.
"You shouldn't be carrying her. She's too heavy for you, Penny."
"Don't be silly." Penny took the dog back and hugged her tight. "Ooh, you look like a million bucks!" she said. Olive kissed her face again.
"Hope you don't mind. Jessi thought a bath was in order. And Bubba wanted to help. By the time I found those two, they were wetter than Stubby here."
Penny watched Ben's face. Saw the way he was still eyeing her uneasily and barely restraining himself from reaching out to help each time the dog made a sudden move. "I don't mind. I was going to give her a bath myself."
"Um, Jessi found more than dirt." Ben came farther inside, reached back to close the door behind him, but then seemed to think better of it.
"What do you mean?"
"Put her down, Penny. Please, you're making me crazy."
Frowning, Penny lowered Olive to the floor. Olive didn't mind. She immediately put her nose to the carpet and snuffled along like a living vacuum. "Okay. She's down." She didn't like his insistence on treating her like a weakling. "What did Jessi find?"
"Your dog is expecting."
Penny blinked. "Olive is pregnant?"
"My kid sister's a vet, remember? She's pregnant, all right. All fifty-plus pounds of her, and I'll hazard a guess she'll be even heftier in the next few weeks."
Penny shook her head and crouched down on the floor to bring herself to Olive's eye level. "I never would have guessed! I mean, look at her. She doesn't exactly look like the glowing mother-to-be, does she?" Ollie tilted her head to one side as if listening, looking for all the world like a fighter who'd been hit in the face too often. "Puppies, Olive! You're going to be a mommy."
Ben cleared his throat. She couldn't quite believe he was competing with her dog for her attention, but that was the feeling she got. She stood up again, brushing her hands together. "She's quite a dog."
"Jessi seems to think so. Pure English bulldog, she says. Where did you get her?"
Ollie barked as if to say it was about time someone recognized her greatness. Penny smiled at her companion. "I found her outside a diner in El Paso. The owner tried to kick her, I threatened to kick him and we've sort of been together ever since."
Ben stared at her as if he wasn't certain who she was. Join the club, she thought.
"You threatened to kick a grown man?"
"Oh, it was more than a threat. I'd have done it in a minute. He said she'd been there for weeks, though, and since she has no tags and no collar, I figured she was as alone in the world as I was."
She saw him wince, and wished she hadn't blurted that.
"I'm sorry you were alone, Penny," he told her. His blue eyes bore into hers intently, yet managed to convey gentleness at the same time. "You have to believe that if I knew you were alive, no power in heaven or earth could have kept me from coming for you."
Her breath rushed out of her lungs all at once. He said that with such passion. Could it be true?
She didn't know what to say, how to respond to that.
He seemed a little surprised by his own words, as well, as if he'd blurted them without intending to. And he averted his gaze. "I … I thought you came up here to lie down."
"I did. My headache's better now."
"Still…"
"I think I'll take a shower and then … then I'd like to look around the ranch, if that's okay."
He frowned as if it was the last thing he expected to hear from her. "I don't know if that's such a good idea…"
"Why not? It's a beautiful day and … I want to see this place I'm supposed to know so well. I'm curious."
"But you should rest—"
"I can rest when I'm dead," she quipped, then stilled when Ben's face went so chalk white she thought he might pass out cold. It must have been instinct that made her rush close to him, gripping his firm shoulder in
one hand and cupping the base of his neck with the other. "Are you okay? Ben? Did I say something wrong?"
"No…" His voice was little more than a rasp. Then he looked down into her eyes, and she was still touching him, and she knew he wanted a lot more. To hold her. To kiss her. She could practically read each thought that crossed his mind. "If, um, if you're sure you feel up to it, I'll take you around the ranch this afternoon."
"I'm not so sure you feel up to it," she said.
Ben stared down at her face. "You would tell me … if you were … under the weather or … or anything."
"I can't think of any reason why I wouldn't."
Studying her face, he nodded. "Okay," he said. "Okay."
"Guess I'll take that shower now." He glanced toward the bathroom. "I'll run you a bath—"
"For heaven's sake, Ben, was I a complete invalid before, or what?"
He blinked at her, as if searching for words. "I just…" He gave his head a shake. "Sorry. I'll get out of your hair." He turned to go, then turned back. "Jessi says pregnancy can be tricky for bulldogs … not that there's anything to worry about. Just, when you feel up to it, we ought to bring her by the clinic for a checkup."
"When I feel up to it?" Penny repeated.
Ben shrugged. "Right."
"Okay. I'll do that."
He nodded and then left her alone. Penny lay back on the bed, head throbbing all over again, eyes wet, longing with everything in her to remember the past she'd lost. Wondering why her husband seemed to think she wouldn't have the energy to go info town for something as simple as taking her dog to the vet. Why he'd seemed shocked she'd felt up to exploring the ranch.
She was going to have to sit him down and make him tell her the truth. And part of her wondered why she hadn't done that already.
She knew why. The look in his eyes scared the hell out of her. And part of her thought maybe the truth was something she really didn't want to know.
Ollie stood with paws on the edge of the bed and barked until Penny pulled her up. Then the little dog curled close beside her. In seconds she was snoring.
"You sure don't snore like a female," Penny whispered, stroking the still damp fur.
THE HUSBAND SHE COULDN'T REMEMBER Page 7