by Aubrey Cara
She drifted for a bit, completely content in his embrace. She wasn't sure how long they had laid there before he shifted, disengaging from her body. The feeling made her whimper and he kissed her hair, rearranging her body to drape over his. With the thick, fleecy blanket covering them, she felt surprisingly protected from the chill.
After a time she asked, “Are the ridges from the truck bed getting uncomfortable?”
He didn't even open his eyes when he replied, “Not enough to move.”
That made her smile. She wasn't ready to move either. They both lay there in the quiet for a minute before she asked, “Were you mad? That I didn't tell you I was a virgin?” she clarified.
“Maybe a little. It certainly threw me off for a second.”
“Would you have gone easier on me—been more gentle—had you known?”
“No.”
Just that. A simple 'no' and she felt shivers race down her spine. Her body responded in an achy awareness that was always close to the surface when she was near him. Hell, her nerve endings stood up and did a dance if she even thought about him.
Shaking off her thoughts she asked, “How about you? Were you born sexually aware? Did you ask that Mindy girl her safeword? Or was that the case of the older woman teaching you a thing or two?”
“Hardly,” he said. She could feel his chuckle under her cheek and the rumble moved through her body, warming her.
“You read naughty books too, huh?” she said with false astonishment. “And here I thought those books were only corrupting the women of America. How shortsighted of me.”
He tickled her side, making her squeal. “I'm sorry to disappoint you imp,” he said. “I've not been reading naughty books. Although I may play out a few scenes with you if you want.”
She groaned. Her body was so sore and sated. Not to mention her fantasies were wimpy compared to everything he'd done to her so far. “Seriously. I want to know,” she persisted. “When did you become the despoiler of women's virtue and sexual beast you are today?”
He looked up from where his head laid on one folded arm and quirked a brow. “Despoiler and sexual beast, huh?”
“Don't let it go to your head.”
“I'll try not to, but it's going to be hard,” he said waggling his brows. Then he grew quiet. She wasn't sure he was actually going to answer her question when he said, “I was twenty-three—when I discovered things like safewords that is. My Master Sergeant said he was taking me out to a club. We were on the west coast just finishing a training session. I'm still not sure how I ended up on the receiving end of the offer. I figured why not? Have some beers, maybe pick up some women. Imagine my surprise when we walked into a BDSM/fetish club. I almost turned back around and walked out the door. I never felt so out of place.”
Kat covered her mouth to hold back a giggle. “I can't picture you stunned by anything. Let alone feeling out of place.”
“Yeah, well...I warmed up to the experience pretty quick.”
“I'm sure you did,” Kat said, smiling.
“That was the night I discovered I'm a kinky bastard. I mean, I always had an idea...I learned a lot that night. The overall experience...the club, the full out lifestyle—having a submissive or a slave, or being one—that wasn't quite for me. Although there were some things I found particularly appealing. Like the idea of submissive women kneeling at my feet and calling me ‘Sir’ in sexy little voices. Seeing women getting spanked and hearing them moaning their pleasure tripped my trigger also.”
Kat's trigger was being tripped just thinking about being the woman kneeling at his feet. She felt pathetic at how turned on she was at the thought of calling him “Sir” and being the one who moaned out her pleasure as he spanked her. Her recently sated body was warming up at the thought.
“During our time at the club,” he said, “then again after, my Master Sergeant stressed the importance of safe words. Although I may not be on BDSM websites looking for dates, I use enough kink that safewords have come in handy. It's easier to gauge just how far my partner of the moment wants to take things. Plus I've never been with a woman that didn't know to expect some kink after I asked for a safeword. I think some women have come to me just for that extra bit of kink.”
Caleb's words cooled Kat's jets. She would do well to remember she was one of many. He wasn't bragging. He was just being honest. She couldn't fault him for that, but she could kick herself. She had be lulled by all the intimacy they had shared over the past twenty-four hours.
Even now she was curled up to him. She had already memorized his scent and the feel of his body against hers. She already knew she would carry the memories of what it felt to be pressed up against him like she was in this moment for the rest of her life. Yet she seemed to forget she wasn't anything special to him.
He wasn't in the process of falling in love with her. He may not even think twice about her a few months from now. She was his partner of the moment, as he called the women he had been with. Sooner or later their moment would come to an end and she was suddenly afraid she'd be the one left devastated.
*** ***
Caleb felt the exact moment Kat pulled away. Not physically but emotionally. Her body, that which had been soft and pliant, stiffened under his arm he had wrapped around her. He cursed at himself. He was a tactless idiot to talk about other women to the woman he was with. He scrubbed his free hand over his face.
After two minutes of silence, he wasn't surprised at all when she said she was ready to head home and started pulling on her clothes. He lay there for a minute debating what he should say before he started putting on his own clothes. He thought about trying to put her at ease and flip things around. He knew he should tell her she was different. He didn't spend the night let alone the day with other women. He'd never wanted to. Instead he held his tongue. He may have been obsessed with her for months, but to her he was just the guy that turned her on. As of this morning he was still the guy she was trying to avoid.
He clenched his jaw when he helped her down from the truck bed and she promptly removed his hands from her waist. They were halfway back to Kat's apartment when she cursed. He gave her a questioning look.
“I still don't have a car for tomorrow,” she said. “And I forgot to call and get mine towed.”
“I called a tow while we were at my mom's.”
“Of course you did.” She didn't sound appreciative. “Let me guess; you sent my car to your friend's garage? And you probably didn't even ask how much it would cost.”
He inwardly winced. He hadn't actually ask about what the payment would be. “If it's too much just let me know, kitten. I'll pay for it.”
“Oh yeah, kitten will make sure to do that.”
He ignored her tone. Undaunted, he said, “I can spend the night again.”
She shot him a hostile look at the suggestion. He slowed down and flipped a U-turn on the mostly deserted road to head back to Circle F.
“Where are we going?” she asked.
“To the ranch,” he bit out. “I'll let you take my truck. I'll swap it out with a work truck tomorrow if you want.”
She nodded, lips pursed. She wasn't happy to have to see him again and didn't that just stick in his craw.
“I could take you to a twenty-four hour grocery store right now. Then I could make you breakfast in the morning.” He didn't know why he made the offer or why he was pushing to spend more time with her. He knew she was pissed and was ready to be away from him. She shook her head in the negative, keeping silent. He couldn't tell if she was tempted by his offer or trying not to say what was really on her mind.
“You sure?”
“Yep...” She had looked like she had something to add to that, but held her tongue. She pointedly stared out the window for the rest of the ride. Damned if he knew what to say to break the uncomfortable tension filling the cab of his truck. He thought about needling her just to watch her go off. He decided against it, figuring he didn't need the ensuing bloodshed in his vehic
le.
Once they reached the ranch, he pulled onto the drive in front of the bunk house and hopped out, leaving the keys in the ignition. Kat came around and didn't even look at him as she climbed in behind the wheel. He held the door before she could no doubt slam it in his face.
She raised an eyebrow to indicate her impatience. Her lips were pursed and damned if her little nose wasn't stuck in the air. He wanted to put her over his knee and spank her ass for giving him such a snotty look. He didn't think a spanking would help his case at the moment. They needed to talk this out. He wasn't sure what he was going to say. He only knew it needed to be charming, maybe even a bit courtly. He refused to let her leave cold and shut off from him. It would be worse than how she'd ignored him these past three months.
“I've never been with a woman bare-back before,” he said, badly. He grimaced at his own words. They hadn't come out right at all.
“Come again?”
He wanted to quip he would love to 'come again', but didn't think she'd find it funny. Instead he tried to explain, “I've never...you know. Not worn a condom. Even if a woman was on the pill. I've always worn a rubber.” He blew out a breath. It seemed like a much more meaningful thing to say in his head. Sinking into her warmth without anything separating them had been hugely significant for him. Saying it out loud didn't really do it justice. He felt connected to her in a way he'd never felt connected to another woman in his entire life.
Her face became a cloudy mask. “Well, aren't I fortunate,” she snarked. “Am I also going to be the lucky recipient of some STD from your slutty ass?”
He gripped the door tight, fighting the urge to rip her out of the truck and spank the sass out of her lush fanny. It was becoming alarmingly apparent that he was going to have to work on his communication skills. He'd never cared enough about a woman to try to talk things out.
“My slutty ass,” he said unclenching his teeth. “Hasn't been with anyone but a snippy, little virgin in the past year. So why don't you climb off your high horse.” She deflated a little but didn't look like she fully believed him, so he added, “I've had my blood screened before we were together, but I can get tested again.” He speared her with a look. “I'm going to assume you've not been with anyone but me.”
“Yes—I mean no, I haven't. I'm sorry for slut-shaming you.”
She looked adorably disgruntled when she said it. He knew it must have been an effort for her to apologize. That she had made him smile. She still wanted to be mad at him but she wasn't. Interesting.
He leaned in the doorway. Crowding her space. “I'll accept your apology if you give me a kiss.”
She rolled her eyes as she leaned into to kiss him. He moved his head back and said, “Uh-uh. Not on the lips.”
She shoved his chest, like he knew she would. “You're such a neanderthal ass. You can suck your own dick, Tex.”
He chuckled, grabbing her by the back of the neck to pull her in for a real kiss. She fought against it, lips sealed. He only ground his mouth harder against hers. She bit his bottom lip hard before softening. He groaned into her yielding mouth. He liked that she fought him. He'd let her bite and scratch at him like a snarling kitten. It made it all the sweeter when she gave in and let him pet her.
Her hands were gripping the front of his jacket, pulling him closer. The feel of her hot wet, mouth under his made him want to rip her pants off and take her right there. Her creamy white legs dangling out the door of his truck.
He wondered if her ass was still red and tender. She had looked glorious all trussed up in his belt. His belt that even now bore her teeth marks. Her needy cries still rang in his ears. Her pale skin had been almost translucent under the light of the stars. It made a stark contrast to the dark splotches of color from where he spanked her. Just the thought of her soft smooth body under him earlier made him hard as a fence post.
Not breaking contact from her sweet mouth, he pulled Kat’s legs out, opening her knees wide. His hands went to the fly of her jeans and she pulled back.
*** ***
Kat felt drugged. Caleb's kisses did that to her. When she felt his hands on the clasp of her jeans she knew she needed to protest but couldn't remember why in her sensual haze. Then she heard someone from a distance call out, “Hey, Caleb! That you?”
Without rational thought she pulled back. Panicked, she jerked her knees up, she planted her feet in the center of Caleb's chest, and kicked out. Caught off guard he stumbled back and almost fell on his ass. She slid down, wedging herself between the steering wheel and the seat.
Caleb looked befuddled for a moment before a storm cloud crossed his face. Then the same voice, she now recognized as ranch hand Toby called out again, “Hey man, that is you. Who you got with you?”
She locked gazes with Caleb, beseeching him with her eyes not to give her up. His jaw clenched. He raised a brow at her. He looked irritated as all hell, and she wasn't sure if he was mad at her or at the situation.
Not taking his eyes off her he called out to Toby, “Don't you have somewhere you need to be, Toby?”
She heard Toby chuckling. When she heard the bunkhouse door close she blew the breath she hadn't realized she'd been holding. She did not want anyone at the ranch to know that her and Caleb had a thing going on. She eased up onto the seat and looked over at Caleb still standing there watching her with a displeased look on his face.
“I'm sorry,” she said. “I heard Toby and—” Whatever she was going to say was cut off when he grabbed the back of her head, pulling her to him for a hard, consuming kiss.
He pulled back, his hand still tight in her hair at the back of her neck. He gave her an intense look that was hard to read and said, “We're going to figure out what this is between you and I. Then every damn person on this ranch is going to know you're mine.”
Before she could respond to his high handed dictate, he said, “Spend the day with me tomorrow?”
The offer threw her off. As tempted as she was, she needed some time to herself. “I have some things I need to get done before I go to work tomorrow night.” Then she remembered she was going to have his vehicle. “If you need your truck back I can come by in the morning—”
“No, don't worry about it. I'll borrow a work truck, and I'll swing by Rusty Spur while you're working.”
She foolishly looked forward to him seeing him, even as she told herself he was just coming to get his truck.
He pulled her in for another kiss, this one softer, and said, “Drive safely, kitten,” before shutting the door and backing away from the truck. He moved to stand in front of the vehicle. Arms crossed he just stood there as she adjusted the seat and mirrors. She put the truck in gear and turned it around before heading down the driveway.
She looked in the mirror and she could still see Caleb bathed in the floodlights in front of the bunk house. He hadn't moved from his spot. She suddenly felt like she was leaving something important behind.
CHAPTER SIX
Kat pulled into the parking lot of the Rusty Spur the next evening and parked Caleb's truck with care. She hadn't even made it to the main road last night before she realized she'd never driven a truck, not-to-mention a super-sized truck on steroids. When she'd pulled into the parking lot of her apartment complex she'd worried the beast with four wheels she was driving was about to hit all the cars she passed by. It took her over ten damn minutes to park the thing.
She would have thought twice about borrowing it had she known how difficult it would be to drive it. She had a newfound appreciation for all those big-rig drivers.
Once she'd gotten the truck parked, the real anxiety began. She'd taken in the expanse between the truck and the stairs to her apartment as she was about to exit the vehicle and was hit with a wave of nerves. She had no phone and was completely alone. Friday night's experience started running through her head. She knew firsthand how hard it was to fight off someone intent to do her harm.
Sitting in the truck last night all by her lonesome, she'd felt extr
emely exposed in that moment and acutely aware of every potential danger. She tried to shake off the feeling. Her apartment complex was well lit, even at night.
She berated herself for being such a silly coward. She assured herself repeatedly she was not going to be assaulted on the way to her door. Then a little voice whispered, “what if?” Damn that voice. She couldn't let one jerk attacking her keep her holed up in a vehicle every time she needed to go anywhere at night.
Rationally she knew she shouldn't be freaked out. She wasn't about to do anything she hadn't done without thought, many times before. Still, it took her another ten minutes to psych herself up.
Heart racing, she'd clutched her pepper spray and sprinted down the sidewalk and up the stairs to her apartment nearly in tears. Had any of her neighbors been out at that time, they probably would have been the unlucky recipients of a face full of pepper spray.
Once inside she still couldn't shake the anxiety riding her. She ended up turning on every light in the apartment. Then she looked in the closet and under the bed, just to make sure she was safe. She knew she was being a head case.
She'd gone to bed with the light on her nightstand still on. Even as conflicted as she felt about Caleb, she was pretty sure in that moment, lying scared in her bed, she would have called him had she known where her blasted phone was. She'd fallen into a restless sleep, wishing he had been there with her.
She'd woken the next morning still tired. All her tender places were sore from so much use the day before. It only made her all the more aware of Caleb's absence. An absence she requested for her own good, she reminded herself. After a long, hot shower, she headed to the grocery store. She had wisely parked in the boonies to ensure she wouldn't have to spend ten minutes trying to back Truck-zilla out from between two other cars.
Thankfully the day had been cool and beautiful. She'd opened up all the windows of her apartment so she could paint and decoupage the day away. She'd been able to lose herself in another world for a little while. A place where she didn't hear her mother and sister's voices in her head criticizing her every move. A place where she didn't have to think about what she was doing with her life.