Sapience

by bret Wellman

  “Hey, Brianna.” I said, trying to judge her reaction.

  “Blake, come here.” She waved over my shoulder then turned back to the basket.

  Blake ran up to her like a stupid puppy dog ignoring me completely. At least the run in with the soldiers had cooled the tension between us.

  That was the last time I attempted to talk to her, though every day she was there in gym trying not to look in my direction, failing every now and again to quickly look away. I tried to ignore Lillie’s persistence that I try again.

  Eventually I found that flirting with the other girls at school helped, not get rid of, but more or less numb my feelings toward her, but only for seconds at a time. To my surprise they took my flirtatious attitude strongly and I found myself a bit overwhelmed.

  Ashley, a quiet, sandy blond-haired girl from my second hour, took hold of a simple complement I gave her when the teacher assigned us to be partners. She grew more and more friendly with each passing minute. The next day a similar thing happened with Page, a red-head in my first hour, and again the next day. By the end of the week I found myself trying to slow things down. It started to feel like I was picking up a new girl every day. Okay, so maybe all the attention wasn’t so bad. My days got a lot more exciting, that was for sure. The dialog was a bit on the boring side though. After becoming a trained assassin, talking about cuddly animals and the weather just wasn’t cutting it for me.

  Through the following weeks the girls complained that I hadn’t called them yet. To be truthful, in the end the one girl I really wanted to call ignored me. Why couldn’t Brianna be more like these girls? I expected my lack of enthusiasm to push most of them away. Strangely they approached me more.

  Neal wouldn’t let the new attention go unnoticed, he called me a month after I saved Brianna to ask my approval on a girl who had seen him hanging out with me and now liked him, don’t ask me how that worked.

  “She’s like a ten, and I think she might even play video games!” He practically cheered after I told him that if he liked her he shouldn’t care what I think.

  “Are you going to ask her out?” I said. To be honest I couldn’t see it happening.

  “What if I just wait for her to ask me out?” You could tell by his voice that just the thought scared him.

  “Stop.” I demanded. “Suck it up and ask her out.” Maybe if I had my old mind I could have told him some better advice. Understanding how these girls think was turning out to be impossible.

  “Okay” His shaky voice whispered back.

  The next day the sandy blond-haired girl, Ashley, managed to find me after every class. I smiled and gave her a playful shove every now and then. It made me feel good to see the joy in her eyes.

  She was a good friend and made it obvious that she wanted to be more. I don’t know what it was but I just didn’t feel that way about her. She was attractive and funny, I couldn’t find a good reason why I didn’t like her. I even tried to force myself to.

  At lunch Neal came to sit at our usual table with a chubby blond-haired girl. The “Ten” from our phone call I presumed.

  “Hi William!” The girl said before they even sat down.

  “What are you guys up to?” I asked.

  Neal jumped into a ramble about some science project they had paired up together to do. I couldn’t help but notice the “ten” looking at me. Actually I couldn’t seem to find a way out of her sight. I felt like I was under a magnifying glass. Neal didn’t notice.

  When he was getting to the end of his story, Page, the girl from first hour came up and sat down next to me. Neal’s girlfriend grew pretty rude after that. She started to cut Page down, I almost couldn’t believe it. Page did her best to ignore it, every once in a while her face would turn red and I half expected her to dive across the table. Neal didn’t notice that either.

  After lunch Page babbled on about her parents buying her a new car. I nodded and acted interested the whole way to class. It caught me off guard when she followed me through the gym doors inside. It seemed like she was definitely planning to be late for her next class.

  “Did you hear about the new Splitting Ways movie in the theaters?” She said, blushing. “I hear it’s really good.”

  “No.” I said. “I guess I haven’t been watching TV lately.”

  “Oh...” She twisted her hair around her finger. “I kind of was thinking of going to see it.”

  “You are?” I tried to act oblivious to the truth of what she was asking. “Tell me if it’s any good.”

  Her face was ashen as she looked down at the floor. I felt bad for acting oblivious.

  “I was hoping maybe, you would like to come with me?”

  For a split second I started thinking of an excuse but the guilt won me over and I reluctantly forced a smile.

  “I’d love to.” I said. In that same instance I glanced back to see Brianna staring at us from the bleachers. Had she been listening to our entire conversation?

  When I turned back Page was beaming. “When do you want to go?”

  “I’m free tonight.” I shrugged.

  “Me too.”

  “I’ll call you tonight then. Shall I pick you up or do you want to meet there?” I didn’t know where the theater was but it couldn’t be hard to find.

  “Do you mind picking me up?”

  “No.” I said. “I can do that.”

  “Ok, call me.” She smiled and turned, joyfully to exit the gym. I shook my head and turned back to the bleachers to find Brianna still staring with a pained expression on her face.

  I paused to stare back for a second then started to walk past her up the bleachers. I took a seat while waiting for the gym teacher to start calling attendance. It was hard to grasp the rush of emotion that shot through me. I had told Page I would take her to the movies and yet all I could think about was Brianna watching us. She hadn’t been trying to hide anything, it was almost rude.

  I tried not to look in her direction while the teacher made his way down the list of names. To help guide my eyes away I started to untie and retie my shoe laces. My heart started to race as I felt a girl’s hair brush against me while she sat down.

  “What are you doing?” and now she was going to what, lecture me on who I could and couldn’t go out with?

  “Tying my shoe.” I said as I glanced up into her blue eyes. Brianna’s jaw was tight. She looked frustrated.

  “Why did you ask Page to the movies?” Her mouth was set into a deep frown, it was an accusation.

  “She asked me.” I said acting uninterested, though I was.

  “It’s not bad enough that the Kingdom sent you here for just us, now you decided to go after the local girls too?” She whispered. “Is it one of your perks?”

  My anger flared and I gritted my teeth. There were no signs of humor in her expression.

  “I don’t care what you think Brianna.” I practically growled and in that instant I really didn’t care what she thought, because what she thought was ludicrous.

  “Why did you come here?” Her voice was guarded.

  I didn’t want to talk to her anymore. Part of me wanted to tell her we really did come to capture them, just to see her reaction.

  “To help you.” I managed to say.

  “To help me?” Her voice was filled with sarcasm. “And you expect us to believe that?”

  “No, I expect you to keep pushing me away.”

  She was quiet. The hint of frustration never left her face.

  When she finally spoke she was surprisingly calm. “Mental users always know just what to say.”

  “And you know nothing.” I said.

  “You’re wrong.” Anger clouded her expression.

  I jumped to my feet as the gym teacher blew his whistle to announce the start of class. My teeth clenched tighter and tighter with every step. I could feel Brianna right on my heels as we neared the wood floor.

  “Liar!” She said and started to make her way to the left.

  “Whore!” It w
as the first word that came to my mind; I couldn’t believe I had just resorted to childish name calling.

  The teacher had us playing floor hockey and as luck would have it, Brianna was assigned to the other team. At first my plan was to ignore her but one good welt on my calf from her stick changed my whole perspective on the game. The goal of getting the puck into the net had changed to stealing the puck from Brianna. And the simple task had changed for her to hit me with the stick as hard as you can without anyone noticing. She was surprisingly good at hitting me and I was thankful when the teacher blew his whistle for us to switch teams.

  For the rest of gym, every time I glanced in her direction she was glaring at me. It felt strange to be the one ignoring the other for a change. I made it a point to get so into the game that my thoughts changed from her to simple commands. Gain control of the puck, steal, pass and shoot. I was at my wits end when the final whistle blew marking the end of gym.

  It was a relief to be out from under Brianna’s glare and on my way to my car. The welts left from her hockey stick burned and I was so mad I stormed right past everyone in the halls.

  A strange rebellious feeling crept over me when I got close enough to my car to see Page leaning against the hood. Truthfully I wasn’t happy to see her. But I needed somebody to help get my mind off of Brianna.

  “Hi William.” She called.

  “Page.” It came out a little harder then I had meant.

  “How was gym?” She asked as I made my way to the driver’s side door. She was blushing. That wasn’t a good sign.

  “Not bad.” I lied.

  “Did you see Brianna staring at us before I left?” She asked in a sweet voice. My teeth immediately clenched tight. All thoughts were back to Brianna.

  “No, I did not.” I struggled to keep my voice calm and level. I wonder if she had noticed.

  She shrugged and tapped the toe of her shoe on the ground. “It was really weird.”

  “She’s weird.” I said.

  “Anyone who can date Blake Turnip has to be a weirdo.” She added.

  So Brianna was dating Blake. The facts were overwhelmingly obvious. I was just in denial.

  “Yup.” I said, climbing into my car.

  “So anyway, the reason I came out here is because my ride left and I was wondering if you could drive me home?” The blush was fresh on her face as she asked. I doubted she had a ride in the first place. At least it would help me find her house later when I went to pick her up for the movies.

  “Hop in.” I swear she was in the passenger seat before I finished saying it.

  “Thank you so much for the ride.” Her high pitch voice made her sincerity dramatically fake. I just nodded and backed out of the parking space.

  I glanced over and saw that Brianna was walking toward Spencer who sat in the front seat of an old, beat up, station wagon. Spencer didn’t bother to look in my direction but Brianna was yet again glaring. I tried not to look as I drove toward the exit. Every time I peeked she was there, staring. I was thankful Page didn’t notice. It wouldn’t make my day any better if she kept bringing it up at the movies.

  “We should go to the six o’clock showing.” She said. “It’s cheaper then.”

  Six was good. I could be on with my life by nine.

  “So pick me up by five thirty.” She continued.

  “I’ll be there.” I tried to cover up the fact that I was annoyed the best I could. She was a sweet girl and I didn’t want to offend her.

  “We are going to love this movie I just know it.” She clapped her hands together really fast as she spoke. It reminded me of a five year old who ate too much sugar.

  “Definitely.” Before she could say anything else I cranked up the radio so it would be harder to talk.

  I took one last glance at Brianna before pulling out of the parking lot. She was getting into the passenger side of the station wagon, and still staring in my direction. She probably thought I was going to kill Page or something. With a sigh of frustration and anger I drove out of sight.

  I managed to get Page home with minimal conversation. The radio really does come in handy more often than people think.

  When I got home I decided to get a good work-out in. I had to find some way to get rid of some stress and exercise usually did the trick.

  In one of the large rooms in the basement Lillie and I had covered the walls with mirrors. Lillie then insisted on buying every work-out machine known to man and placing them down there. It pretty much looked like a gym you had to pay to get into, only there were no other people using the machines.

  While I was benching a heavy set of weights, Adrian decided to stroll down to watch. Ever since he decided to kick me, we hadn’t been on the best of terms. Lillie and he hadn’t spoken once. They didn’t argue about it, Lillie just simply stopped talking to him.

  “That has to be the worst form I have ever seen.” He said. “You might as well not work out at all. It’s not like you are going to need it.” He went on like this for a while.

  The fact that he was now making fun of me for working out didn’t help. Before long the stress of the day was back and I was once again gritting my teeth in frustration. I tried my best to ignore him. His quick jabs at my technique and jokes about how working out was useless frustrated me.

  He kept on me until I finally decided to ditch him and take a quick shower. For a short time I found myself basking in the warm water. Before long my mind was racing to Brianna again. What was wrong with her? Did she really think I was going to hurt Page tonight? I wish I had my mind back, then I could just trick her into thinking whatever I wanted. Maybe I would ask Lillie to help me with that. She did want the others on our side after all.

  Every muscle in my body went tight as I pictured the Kingdom’s soldiers pulling students from the gym and realized that was what she saw me as. No, she saw me as something worse. She wasn’t afraid of the soldiers, she was afraid of me, of my mind.

  Of course she was afraid of me, I thought helplessly. I was supposed to be something much worse than the soldiers and that’s what she thought I was, a monster.

  Whatever, so be it. As long as I knew what I was. She can do her thing and I will just have to ignore her to the best of my ability. Maybe soon I could talk Adrian and Lillie into moving away to some other small town. Then everybody would be happy.

  Lillie came dancing into my room just as I finished putting on my clothes. A big smile was spread across her face. Her brain was wired more toward hacking computers than reading people, but she could figure out what someone was thinking far before the normal person could. I didn’t bother to try and hide anything around her.

  “What’s up?” I asked.

  “Who are you taking on a date?”

  “I’m taking my friend Page out to the movies at six.” I didn’t like the word date in this particular situation.

  “You be nice to her.” Her brow wrinkled with displeasure. So she had figured out how I felt about this whole situation.

  “Lillie, you know I would never do anything to hurt this girl’s feelings.” I said. It was true, there was a part of me that really did want to go to the movies with Page. It would be stupid for any guy not to. She was a great girl.

  She gave a satisfied smile to my answer. “Good. Don’t lead her on either.”

  “I know.”

  The date with Page went pretty smooth. I made sure to keep the radio nice and loud whenever we were in the car. The movie also helped keep us from talking. I’m pretty sure we never had more than one conversation the whole time.

  “Every movie is always the same.” She had said when we were leaving the theater.

  “I know! When are they going to make something a little different?” I said. The truth was never. “Did you know that the government won’t allow it? All movies have to inspire faith in the Kingdom.”

  “William.” She whispered in alarm. She was looking around as if a government agent were about to jump from the bushes.

 
“I’m serious, they kill people for even suggesting movies not based around the Kingdom. It’s a joke.”

  “Are you ready to go?” She asked.

  I was about to go on about the Kingdom but stopped, she looked frightened. “Yea, let’s get out of here.” I said instead.

  When I dropped her off I tried in the best way I could manage to tell her I couldn’t be in a relationship and in the future we could only be friends. She surprised me by thanking me and giving me a kiss on the cheek, then walking inside.

  I was tired when I got home. The warm fluffy sheets of my bed lured me into sleep. My heavy thoughts of that ridiculous movie shifted into light daydreams of what it would be like if I could make an underground movie bashing the Kingdom. The daydreams grew more and more light as they shifted from what jokes would be made to all the action scenes where I would show the Kingdom’s soldiers getting beat up. It’s hard to say when the day dreams turned into real dreams.

  The next morning, when I got to school, I sat and listened to the radio before getting out of my car. No need to start the accusations from Brianna early. When I finally decided to get out and start walking to the school my passenger door flung open. My head snapped over. Brianna was climbing casually into the seat.

  “What do you want?” I said defensively as she closed the door.

  “Can we talk?” She grabbed the knob of my radio and turned it off.

  “About what?”

  “William, I’m sorry. I had no right to say those things to you yesterday.” Her voice was quiet.

  I admired her beautiful face. Her brown hair was braided into long pigtails. The dimples were subtle on her cheeks as she frowned. I had to look away to try and hold on to my dignity.

  “I’m over it.” I lied, looking straight out the front windshield. “So you can go back to doing your thing and I will do mine.”

  “Maybe you are, but I’m not.” She whispered.

  I couldn’t take it anymore. I was trying to rid my feelings for her and she was twisting them right back, for what?

  “I forgive you.” I declared then hopped out of the car and started walking towards the school.