Torn

by Shelli Bowers

  “Yeah, I know you can, but I still want to know.”

  “Ok,” I said.

  Scott started to relax a little and I was glad. I didn’t need him all worked up when mom and dad got home. I knew they would have a million questions all on their own. They certainly didn’t need any help from Scott.

  “So, tell me about this Stephen guy” Scott said

  “Well, he’s nice enough” I said. “He’s cute, but I don’t know if it’s going to amount to anything or not. I’m supposed to go out with him tomorrow night.”

  “Well he’s got to come here and pick you up and meet all of us.” Scott said

  “Ok Dad, don’t remind me.” I said sarcastically.

  “I’m serious” Scott said

  “Fine.” I replied. “By the way I saw a big brown dog in the woods this afternoon, have you seen it before?”

  “No, but don’t get near it. It could be dangerous.” Scott said.

  “It wasn’t dangerous. It crawled off on its belly.”

  “Well, just be careful” Scott said.

  Mom and Dad took the news way better than I thought they would. Mom was actually excited that I had a date. I guess now I was a “normal” teenage girl. Whatever that’s suppose to mean.

  I went over what I was going to wear tomorrow. This is a first. I usually just grab whatever’s on top. Not now. I dug one of the outfits out that Camille talked me into buying and laid it out for tomorrow. “I still can’t believe I’m doing this,” I mumbled to myself.

  Of course I dreamed of Devin. This time we ended up running through the woods, laughing and smiling at each other. Then we suddenly stopped and Stephen stepped out from behind the trees. Then Devin was gone, and standing in his place was the dog that I saw earlier that day. He was growling at Stephen. Stephen was trying to get me to come away from the dog, but I didn’t want to leave it. Then the dog lunged for Stephen and I woke up.

  I managed to get ready for school. Today I was wearing a skirt. I have never worn a skirt to school in my life. Camille said that it would show off my long legs. I just had to be careful and not moon the whole school.

  Camille was waiting out front for me. She couldn’t believe I was going to wear the skirt when I told her. She wanted to see it first thing.

  “Oh my god, you look amazing.” Camille squealed.

  “Thanks, I feel like an idiot.”

  “Well, I can tell you right now, if he doesn’t notice you today then he’s gay.” she said and then we both sniggered at the thought of a boy like him being gay.

  “Come on” she said, “Mike’s waiting for me by the student lounge.”

  As we got closer I saw Mike standing there, but he wasn’t alone. He had company. I saw Brian, Collin, and Chad. I looked closer to see if Devin was there, but didn’t see him. Just as we approached the door, Devin stepped out. I froze, my heart pounding in my chest. I couldn’t breathe being this close to him. I could smell his after shave. There was a whole conversation going on around me, but I couldn’t hear any of it. I was staring at my feet trying to get my senses under control when I saw a hand come into view. A very big, strong hand. I followed it up the muscled arm across the broad shoulders to a smiling face. It was him.

  Camille elbowed me, and I snapped out of. I placed my hand in his and the next thing I knew I was over whelmed with emotions. I heard him say “ My name is Devin” and then I fainted into his arms.

  “Alex! Alex? Are you alright?” I heard Camille saying as I was coming too.

  “Yeah, I don’t know what happened.” I said, noticing that I was lying sprawled out on the floor.

  “So much for not mooning anybody today” I said. That got a laugh out of Camille.

  I felt the faint brush of fingers stroking my hair and I realized my head was resting on someone’s lap. My heart started to pick up pace and I had to remind myself to take deep breaths. I slowly turned my eyes upward to meet Devin’s. A smile came across his lips and I couldn’t help but smile back.

  “Are you alright?” He whispered to me.

  “I am now” I said back.

  “Let’s get you up before one of the teachers come by.” Camille said. “We don’t want you to have to stay in the sick bay all day.”

  She grabbed under one arm and told Mike to get the other one and they lifted my up with Devin pushing from the back. I smoothed out my clothes and was feeling terribly embarrassed.

  “What happened to you? You seemed fine when we came in.” Camille asked.

  “Ah, I think I forgot to breath.” I said

  I heard a low chuckle coming from Devin and I couldn’t help but glare up at him just a little. Why was he laughing at me? He must have recognized the look I gave him because he cut off immediately. But not before he had hurt my feelings. I could feel the red deepening on my face. Well, this is just great! I get within 5 feet of him and I pass out only to wake up having him stroking my hair so sweetly, to him laughing at me. What is wrong with this guy?

  “What’s so funny?” I asked him

  “Huh?” He grunted.

  This made me furious. He could at least be man enough to admit to me. I asked again, this time slower.

  “Why are you laughing at me?” He just gave me stunned look.

  “I’m not, I’m sorry.” He blurted out.

  Well I was already in a mood, and I wasn’t going to be humiliated anymore.

  “Come on Camille,” I said. “I’ve got to go to my locker before 1st period.” All the time giving Devin the meanest look I could muster while I spoke to her. I looped my arm in hers and led her away. I could tell she was as stunned as everyone else was.

  “Wait! I’m sorry” he said as we left. I acted like I didn’t hear him.

  “What was that all about?” Camille demanded

  “What?”

  “That!” She was almost yelling at me now as she was pointing back down the hall where we had left the boys stunned.

  “I don’t like being humiliated”, my own voice raising now.

  “Alex, you fainted. How is that humiliating?”

  “I could live with that part, it was the laughing that I could do without.”

  “He wasn’t laughing at you.” Camille argued

  “Oh really! What was he laughing at then, Huh?”

  “I don’t know Alex, but you are over reacting.”

  “I’m not over reacting.” I argued. “He was laughing at me.

  He’s driving me in sane. He’s in my dreams all the time now.

  When I get close to him I can’t hardly breath, my heart feels like it’s going to jump out of my chest. I can’t take this anymore. I don’t like not being in control of myself. This is so not me, and it ends now. He better stay away from me.” I was almost in tears at this point, and I guess Camille felt sorry for me because she came over and put her arms around me.

  “I’m sorry Alex,” Camille said in a low voice.

  “It’s ok. It’s not your fault. I’m not use to feeling all these emotions. I don’t know how to handle them.”

  “Come on, let’s get your make-up fixed.” Camille said and led me off to the bathroom. Camille helped me get myself presentable again.

  “Thanks Camille. I really don’t understand what’s going on with me. I’m feeling a lot better now though.”

  “Maybe you should talk to your mom” Camille said. “She’s a smart lady and maybe she can help you deal with all this.”

  “You’re probably right. I should talk to her but it’s a very uncomfortable subject to discuss with your mother’” I said.

  “You don’t have to give her all the details just talk to her about it.”

  “I will”

  Just as Camille and I came around the corner, I noticed Stephen waiting for my by my locker. I couldn’t help but smile. Things were easy with him. Not all crazy.

  “Lover boy’s waitin for you.” Camille said

  “I see that,” I said. “I’ll talk to you later” I told her as I went to tal
k to Stephen.

  26

  ALEX

  “Good morning” Stephen said

  “Hey, how are you doing today?” I asked

  “Better now” he said with a sly grin on his face. That got a big smile from me.

  “How are you doing?” He asked

  “It’s been a very strange morning.” I told him

  “What happened?” He asked with concern on his face

  I spilled everything. About fainting, about waking up with my head in Devin’s lap, and about him laughing at me. I could feel the anger rising up in me all over again.

  “Why would someone laugh at me because I fainted?” I asked him. “It doesn’t make sense.”

  “No, it doesn’t.” Stephen said and I could hear the anger in his tone. “Don’t give him a second thought.” Stephen said as he started rubbing my arms trying to comfort me. “He’s just a big dumb jerk. Do you want me to go kick his butt?” Stephen asked with a grin. I smiled back at him.

  “I appreciate you trying to defend my honor, but I think I’ll survive without the violence.” I answered “But, believe me, if I get the chance to laugh at him I’m going to make the most of it.” I said

  Stephen laughed at that. “I’ll help you!”

  We both laughed a few more minutes and then Stephen gently stroked my cheek. It felt warm and tingly. “Thanks,” I sighed.

  “For what?”

  “For making me feel better.”

  “Anytime,” he said with a dazed look in his eyes. “He doesn’t deserve you.”

  That comment shocked me a little. What did he mean he didn’t deserve me? “Huh? What did you say?”

  “I said he doesn’t deserve you.” Stephen answered.

  “He doesn’t have me and I don’t think he wants me.”

  “I didn’t mean that he did,” Stephen stammered. I’m just saying even if he did that he wouldn’t deserve you.”

  I smiled at him, and said “you’re sweet”

  He smiled back and said. “We better get to class or we’re going to be late”.

  He wasn’t the only one in a daze. I hadn’t even heard the bell ring. We rushed off to class, making plans to meet at lunch before departing.

  27

  DEVIN

  “I’m such an idiot,” Devin said

  “Tell me about.” Mike responded.

  “Why did you laugh at her?” Brian asked

  “I wasn’t laughing at her,” snarled Devin, “I was laughing because I was happy. I felt it when I looked in her eyes, and when I stroked her hair. I felt that she was mine. I finally found her, and I was happy.” Devin was pacing the floor and the boys were trying to help him figure out what to do to fix things.

  “Well, first you have to get her alone and apologize,” Chad said

  “Poor on that Alpha charm,” Collin added.

  “God, she’s beautiful, isn’t she?” Devin said it more as a statement than a question.

  “Well, we’re glad you finally realized it.” Mike said.

  “Here comes trouble,” Brian said. Sure enough, Stephen was coming towards them and he didn’t look to happy. He marched right up to Devin so that they were only a few inches between them.

  “What’s your problem Devin?” Stephen asked through gritted teeth.

  “Back off!” Devin growled. “Now’s not the time.”

  “How could you laugh at her?” Stephen spat the words at him.

  “I wasn’t laughing at her, I was just happy.”

  “You hurt her feelings.”

  “Are you here to defend her?” Devin asked in a challenging tone

  “I will if I have to, don’t think I won’t.” Stephen snapped

  “She’s not yours,” Devin said.

  “Apparently she’s not yours either.” Stephen said almost with a smirk on his face.

  “She is mine, you will see.”

  Both the boys bodies vibrated with energy. It was the natural instinct for the wolf to emerge under a challenge.

  “Calm down, both of you.” Mike said in a low voice. “People are starting to stare.”

  They glanced around to see that a crowd had gathered in anticipation of a fight, so they both backed down.

  “Maybe you should come for a little run with me tonight.” Devin taunted Stephen

  “ Love too, where are you and the mutts going to be tonight?”

  “Oh, it will only be me out by the south end of the swamp.”

  “See you there.” Stephen said as he turned to go to class.

  “You can’t fight him,” Brian said. “A battle between two Alphas’s is a battle to the death. You know it would start a tribal war.”

  “It won’t be a battle between two Alpha’s. It’s going to be a battle between two teenage boys over a girl. The council has to know nothing of it.” Devin said

  The boys all looked at each other, none willing to question Devin’s intentions.

  Devin was trying to find a way to apologize to Alex, but every time he saw her, Stephen was there too.

  He’s a persistent little bastard, I’ll give him that. Devin thought. I’ll wait for her at her car this afternoon. Maybe I can catch her by herself then. After lunch he explained to the others what he had in mind, and asked them if the could make sure that Stephen was delayed after school. No violence, just a distraction.

  Devin bolted from his last period just seconds before the bell rang. He was determined to see Alex before she left. He beat her there and waited.

  28

  ALEX

  Camille and I were making our way through the parking lot talking about today’s events when Camille elbowed me in the arm and said, “Uh Oh, you got company.”

  I glanced up expecting to see Stephen and was shocked when I saw Devin.

  “What does he want” I grumbled.

  “He probably wants to apologize again. Mike told me that he feels awful about what happened this morning.” Camille said.

  “Well he should. I don’t want to talk to him Camille, can you get rid of him for me? Please?”

  “What are you afraid of?” Camille asked

  “ I told you already that I can’t control myself around him. I act like complete imbecile.”

  “Well, I get the feeling that he’s not going to give up, so you might as well get it over with now. It’s better here in the parking lot than in front of everyone in the cafeteria.” Camille said.

  “Will you go with me?”

  “Alex you need to handle this. You’ve got to learn. The more your around him the better it will be.”

  “Fine!” I grumbled

  Call me just as soon as you’re done. Camille said

  “Yeah, you wait on that call,” I said with a little too much attitude.

  “Alex”, Camille scolded. I was mad at Camille, but I knew she was right. I turned and started walking towards Devin. He was leaning carefully on the side of the car, looking all gorgeous. I couldn’t help but appreciate his long lean body stretched out on display. I haven’t seen him with his shirt off before, but he always has it off in my dreams. I bet he looks the same in real life. He has his arms crossed over his chest and you can tell that he has nice muscles in his arms. His hair is short, but a little shaggy so that the ends have little curls. Little curls that you just want to run your fingers through. He glances up and sees me coming, and that beautiful smile spreads across his face. I can see his dimples and want nothing more that to kiss each one of them. There goes my heart racing, and I know my face is flushed. I can’t be around this guy for a second without getting all flustered. As I approach he straightens up to greet me.

  “Hello Devin,” I say as I reach the car.

  “Hey Alex.” He said.

  We were just standing there looking at each other. I could sure get lost in those eyes. I caught myself moving closer to him and stopped myself. I think he noticed it too, because he dropped his eyes and he had a playful smile on his face.

  “I really wanted to tell you th
at I’m sorry about this morning. I promise that I wasn’t laughing at you, and I’m real sorry if I hurt your feelings. Will you please forgive me?”

  I didn’t know what to say. I had been so angry with him before, but now all I wanted to do was put my arms around him and tell him it was ok. But…I couldn’t do that.

  “It’s okay, don’t worry about it,” I told him. “I over reacted because I was embarrassed about fainting.”

  “Do you feel better now?”

  “Yeah, Thanks”

  “What made you faint?” Devin asked like he already knew the answer.

  “ I was nervous, and I guess I forgot to breath.”

  “What were you nervous about?”

  How was I going to answer this one? I couldn’t tell him it was because of him. Lucky for me I’m a quick thinker. “I’m a little shy, and I let Camille talk me into wearing this skirt, and I’ve never worn a skirt to school. And I definitely haven’t worn one this short in my life.”

  “Oh, I can understand that” he said. “Well I’m glad she talked you into wearing it, because you have very nice legs” Devin said with a low sultry voice.

  Well, that was about all I could stand. I know my face is bright red and it’s getting harder to breath. If I don’t get away from him now I will have a repeat of this morning. “Um, thanks,” I stammered out. “I’ve got to go.”

  “Okay”, he said hesitantly. “I’ll talk to you later then.”

  I was looking at the ground now unable to make eye contact. I knew that would send me over the edge. “Ok, bye now,” I blurted out as I climbed into the car. I sat catching my breath as I watched Devin leave. I leaned my head over on the steering wheel trying to regain some composure. I don’t know how I’m ever going to be able to talk to him if I can’t control my emotions.