Parliament of Rooks

by Karen Perkins

  ‘What do you mean, some work?’ Lara asks.

  I lie in the bed, out of breath and terrified. If I can’t stand or walk, how on earth am I going to live in and run a three-storey guesthouse?

  ‘Physio,’ the doctor says. ‘Somebody will be along shortly to get you started, but if you’re determined enough, you’ll be back on your feet and running in a few weeks.’

  I’ve had enough. I close my eyes and will oblivion to take me away. Just for a little while. Then I’ll concentrate on learning to walk again.

  3.

  ‘I need to see William,’ I say after the doctor has gone and I feel stronger again.

  ‘Verity, no, you heard what the doctor said. You need to concentrate on getting your strength back,’ Jayne says.

  I glare at her. ‘I’ve been asleep for three months. During that time, I lived another person’s life. It sounds like William still is. I’ve got to help him out of it.’

  ‘I grant you it’s strange you had the same dreams—’

  ‘It was not a dream!’ I stop, realising my voice has risen into a shout. ‘It wasn’t a dream,’ I repeat more calmly. ‘I was Martha, I wasn’t dreaming about her, I was living her life, feeling her emotions, walking in her shoes.’

  ‘And William still thinks he’s Harry,’ Lara says.

  ‘Exactly – he’s still trapped. I’ve got to help him. Maybe the sight of me will shock him out of it.’

  ‘Shock him out of it?’ Lara questions. ‘Exactly how does this story end?’

  I shake my head. I can’t tell my two best friends that I killed Harry. No, that Martha killed Harry. I shake my head again, this time in confusion, trying to make sense of the last image of my dream. Did Martha kill him, or have I just assumed she did? I’m no longer sure what is real and what isn’t.

  ‘I’ll go get you a wheelchair,’ Lara says.

  ‘But the nurses,’ Jayne protests. ‘They’ll stop us – you heard the doctor.’

  ‘The nurses are freaked out by the pair of them – haven’t you noticed they won’t come in here or into William’s room unless they have to?’

  ‘I just thought they were busy,’ Jayne says. ‘They’re run off their feet.’

  ‘Well, that too.’ Lara smiles at Jayne. ‘Either way, they won’t stop us. I won’t be long.’

  She slips out of the door and is gone before Jayne can say anything more.

  ‘It’ll be okay, Jayne. I have to do this. I have to help him get back to himself.’

  Jayne sighs, then sits down by the bed and takes my hand. ‘I know you do, Verity, and I’d do the same. We just don’t know what we’re dealing with and I’m scared that you confronting William, or Harry – or whatever’s doing this to him – will only make things worse.’

  I squeeze her hand with a small smile in reply.

  ***

  Jayne approaches the door of my room, checks both ways, then beckons us forward.

  Lara pushes with rather more enthusiasm than I expect, and I grip the armrests of the wheelchair as it careens through a ninety-degree angle between the doorway and corridor.

  A stern-looking nurse in a dark blue uniform looks at us in surprise, then frowns. ‘And just what, exactly, is going on here?’

  I feel like a schoolgirl again, caught running in the corridor by a teacher.

  ‘She’s feeling very cooped up,’ Jayne says. ‘We thought we’d take her out and about for a change of scenery.’

  ‘I see.’

  I regard the woman, doing my best to keep my face blank. I wonder if I imagine her shudder when she meets my eyes.

  ‘Very well. Don’t be too long. The physiotherapist is due in an hour to start,’ she glances at me, then looks back at Jayne before continuing, ‘Ms Earnshaw’s rehab.’

  I narrow my eyes. Why doesn’t she speak directly to me?

  She bustles past, still refusing to look at me.

  ‘I think you’re right, Lara. That woman looked terrified!’

  Neither Jayne nor Lara say anything, and I don’t blame them. What is there to say?

  Lara starts pushing again, and my wheelchair trundles forwards. For the first time I wonder if Jayne’s right, and I should let William find his own way out of the past.

  I open my mouth to tell Lara to halt, but instead she tells me, ‘Here we are. This is his room,’ as Jayne pushes open the door.

  ***

  I see Vikram and another man first – Mo, I guess from the way his eyes light up when he sees Lara. Vikram looks at Jayne in just the same way. They’re both half-standing, half-sitting on the windowsill and I wonder why they aren’t using the chairs by the bed.

  I look at him then, William, and recoil at the look of horror on his face.

  ‘It’s okay, William,’ I say, hoping at least a part of the real him is awake and can hear me. ‘It’s me, Verity, you’re safe.’

  The others in the room stare at me in confusion.

  ‘Harridan!’ William – no, Harry – shouts. ‘Murderer! Get thee away from me! I have no wish to see thee!’

  Lara gasps from behind me. I ignore her. I have to get through to William.

  ‘That was Martha, William. And a long time ago. She didn’t mean to do it.’

  ‘Thee broke me neck!’ Harry screams. ‘Killed me after I loved and cared for thee!’

  ‘No. Martha killed Harry, William.’ I struggle to keep my voice calm. ‘You’re alive, you’re William Sutcliffe. Harry and Martha lived a long time ago – they’re both long gone.’

  ‘Get away, get away, get away from me, thee hear?’

  ‘What on earth is going on in here?’ The door bursts open and the nurse in the dark blue tunic we’d seen in the corridor bustles into the room.

  She looks at me – glares. ‘I might have known.’ Then she turns her gaze on Lara and Jayne. ‘A change of scenery, you said. Get her back to her room, while we calm Mr Sutcliffe. He needs to rest.’

  I realise another nurse has entered behind the bossy one, and she’s already at William’s bedside, syringe in hand.

  ‘Sorry,’ I whisper. ‘I thought I could get through to him.’

  ‘Just get her back to her room. Everybody out. Now.’

  We obey, Vikram now pushing my chair as Lara – tears threatening – walks with Mo’s comforting arm around her. No one speaks.

  4.

  The physio helps me stagger back to the bed and fall on to it. I lie there for a few moments, out of breath, waiting for the hot trembling in my legs to calm down.

  They begin to feel less like jelly and more like flesh and blood appendages of my body, and I heave myself fully on to the bed with a grunt.

  Another rest, then I turn and manage to get myself under, and the blanket over. I lie back on the pillows panting with effort. This is ridiculous, I’ve only walked a few yards to the bathroom and back! How am I going to manage all the stairs at The Rookery?

  It’ll be months at this rate, yet they’re sending me home in a couple of days.

  A knock at the door, and I force my features into a smile as Lara’s head pops round it. ‘Are you up for visitors?’

  ‘Always,’ I say, my smile turning genuine as Hannah bursts into the room, runs to the bed and jumps up to give me one of the most welcome hugs of my life.

  I squeeze back, holding her tight, although even that hurts and tears are threatening. Not of sadness, but a jumble of emotions. Relief, joy at being loved, fear and love of my own for the little girl in my arms, her mother, and her other ‘aunt’.

  ‘It’s good to see you,’ I say.

  ‘Let Auntie Verity breathe, Hans,’ Lara says. ‘You’re suffocating her.’

  I shuffle over a little to make some room. ‘Here, you stay up here with me, Hans.’

  ‘How are you feeling?’ Jayne says as she takes one of the chairs and Lara the other.

  I frown, then catch myself. I’ve come to hate that question in the last few days, but I know Ja
yne is asking out of genuine concern.

  ‘I’m okay – getting there, anyway. Is there any news of William?’

  Lara narrows her eyes at me, knowing I’m avoiding telling them how I really feel, but Jayne answers before she can say anything.

  ‘He’s coming out of it, but is still quite confused. Occasionally he talks as if he’s Harry still, but Vikram says he can see more and more of William every day.’

  ‘Do you think he’ll see me?’

  ‘Not yet, Verity, sorry.’ Jayne leans over and grasps my hand. ‘He’s still very confused, and after last time ... well, best to give him some space; he’ll come to you when he’s ready.’

  I nod, unsure what to say. I was feeling so sorry for myself only minutes ago, yet William is still struggling to free himself from the nightmare of Harry and Martha.

  ‘How about you?’ Lara asks. ‘Are you still aware of Martha?’

  I consider her question. ‘Not in the same way as when I woke up. I can still remember everything, even how she felt – I felt it all myself and it’s like a memory. But I know I’m Verity, I think Martha’s gone.’

  ‘Think?’ Jayne pounces on the word.

  I shrug and give Hannah a squeeze. ‘How can I know for sure? All I can tell you is that while I have her memories, I’m fully cognisant that she’s a third party.’

  ‘Fully cognisant,’ Lara repeats. ‘You’ve seen the psychiatrist then.’

  I give a small laugh. ‘Yes. Not that she was any help. She has no real idea of what happened, and the best she can say is that it was some kind of mental break.’

  ‘But William having the exact same one at the same time,’ Jayne says. ‘How does she explain that?’

  I shrug again. ‘Mass hysteria.’

  ‘Mass? It only happened to the two of you,’ she protests, ‘and whilst I don’t know William, judging by his friends he’s not the hysterical type, and I know you’re not.’

  ‘As I said – no real idea.’

  ‘Is she going to keep you in?’ Lara asks.

  ‘No.’ I try to smile. ‘No, she’s happy that whatever the episode was, it’s over and I can go home on Monday.’

  ‘That’s fantastic news!’ Lara and Jayne say together, beaming as Hannah says, ‘Yay!’ and snuggles into me.

  ‘Isn’t it?’ Lara asks, seeing right through my fake smile.

  ‘Of course it is, I just—’ I pause and take a deep breath to prevent new tears forming before admitting, ‘I don’t know how I’ll manage. All those stairs and all that work. I can barely get myself to the bathroom and back.’ I wave in the direction of the en-suite bathroom door and lose my battle with the tears.

  ‘How am I going to get around The Rookery? It could take weeks, even months before I’m fit again – my muscle strength has just, just gone.’

  ‘Don’t worry, Auntie Verity, it’s because you’ve been lying down so long. Your muscles will come back, you’ll see.’

  I smile at Hannah as she accompanies her assertion with a rather impressive bicep curl, then I glance at Lara – I know those are her words.

  ‘You heard the physio,’ she responds. ‘Walk a little further every day. Keep pushing yourself, but rest when you need to. You’re the only one who can rebuild your strength, and I know you can and will do it.’

  ‘And you’re not alone,’ Jayne adds. ‘Lara and I will be with you as much as possible, and the boys have been brilliant. I can’t wait for you to see how The Rookery looks now, you’ll be amazed.’

  I stare at them. ‘What do you mean? Have they carried on working? What have they done?’ I start to panic, my breathing becoming faster as I think about all the decisions I should have been there to make. All the plans I’d made being taken over by others. What have they done to my home? I’m struggling to take in enough air, and Hannah looks alarmed.

  ‘Calm down, Verity, and don’t worry. Everything’s okay,’ Lara says.

  ‘It looks really cool, Auntie Verity, I can’t wait for you to see it!’

  I look back at my friends and my breathing slows as trust reasserts itself at the smiles on their faces. ‘Tell me.’

  5.

  I gape at my friends in amazed wonder. Lara has overseen the build every day in between taking Hannah to school and back, and all three of them have spent every weekend there to help get things ready.

  Once my prepayment to Keighley Builders was used up, Jayne put up her own money to fund the rest, and has waited until now to ask me to sign the necessary paperwork for me to reimburse her.

  On top of that, she’s managed both builders and Lara to ensure the build will come in near or even on budget.

  ‘Vikram has been an absolute star,’ she says. ‘You owe him big time. He’s been joining us at the weekends – on his own time – to help with cleaning and buying furniture and stuff. All you have left to do is trial the toiletries to decide what to put in the guest bathrooms – and I’m afraid Lara’s ordered you quite a few to test.’

  Lara shrugs. ‘Gotta get it right – who doesn’t love those little bottles of gorgeousness when you go away? It’s such a disappointment if it’s nasty, cheap stuff.’

  I grin at Lara. ‘Quite right – we can all test them, then compare results.’ I turn my smile on Jayne. ‘Vikram seems very keen,’ I say with arched eyebrow.

  ‘He’s Aunt Jayne’s boyfriend,’ Hannah informs me. ‘And Mo is Mum’s.’

  ‘Hans!’

  ‘Well he is. You’re not very good at keeping secrets, Mum. I have eyes and ears, you know.’

  The three of us stare at Hannah, Lara’s face turning a very unflattering shade of beetroot, then Jayne and I can no longer contain our laughter.

  ‘Is William still your boyfriend, Auntie Verity?’

  I sober and we all fall silent.

  ‘No, Hannah. He’s poorly at the moment, and I don’t know what will happen, or if we’ll still be friends.’

  ‘You’re sure to be when he’s himself again,’ the child asserts. ‘Everyone says so.’

  ‘Hannah, why don’t you go and get a drink? You know where the machine is.’

  ‘Coke?’

  ‘Diet Coke. And one for me too. Would you like one, Verity?’

  Suddenly I have a monumental craving for sweet fizz. ‘Yes, please, full-strength for me though, Hannah, I haven’t had any sugar for three months!’

  She raises her eyebrows at Lara, waiting for her mother’s permission. After receiving the required nod, she looks at Jayne, who holds up a travel mug. ‘I’m okay, thanks Hans. I still have coffee.’

  She collects some coins and skips out of the room, delighted at the prospect of pop.

  ‘Now she’s gone, you two – spill. I haven’t had a chance to ask you properly. When did you and Vikram get together, Jayne? Exactly who is Mo, and how long have you been seeing him, Lara?’

  ‘Short answer, a couple of months now,’ Jayne says. ‘We’ve all been spending a lot of time both here and at your place. We just clicked.’ She waves a hand, embarrassed.

  I smile, it’s been too long since she’s been interested in a man, and Vikram is a decent one. A bit abrupt at times if I remember correctly, but then so is Jayne. They’re a good match.

  I turn my attention to Lara, my smile widening at the grin on her face.

  ‘Mo works with Vikram. He’s a tiler, in fact he’s there now, working on the en-suites.’

  ‘Tiling?’ I’m shocked. The last time I saw The Rookery, it was a building site, and I’m still struggling to fully comprehend the length of time I’ve been in hospital.

  ‘It really is nearly ready, Verity,’ Lara says, taking my hand. ‘I know it must be hard, but you’ve been here a long time. You can still open for Easter if you want to.’

  ‘Easter?’

  ‘Yes, it’s in a couple of weeks.’

  ‘Two weeks?’ I’m stunned. We only just celebrated Christmas.

  Lara squeezes my hand, and Jayne mov
es to sit on the bed. ‘It’ll take a while to orient yourself,’ she says, ever practical. ‘We haven’t done anything about guests yet. No advertising, and while we’ve registered you with the online booking sites, we’ve not made the listings live.’

  ‘We wanted to wait until you were home and well again,’ Lara puts in. ‘You should be the one to click those buttons.’

  ‘And we wanted to help but not take over,’ Jayne finishes.

  ‘Have we done right?’ Lara asks.

  Tears are pouring down my face, and I grasp both their hands in mine. ‘I don’t know how to thank you both,’ I manage to say. ‘I could have lost everything, have nowhere to go.’

  ‘You’ll always have somewhere to go,’ Jayne says as they both embrace me.

  ‘What’s happened?’

  Lara turns. ‘Nothing, Hans. We’ve just been telling Auntie Verity about all the work that’s been done at The Rookery. She’s only crying because she’s happy.’

  ‘Oh.’ Hannah thinks a moment. ‘If Auntie Verity’s going home, does that mean we won’t live there anymore?’

  A shaft of horror spears my heart, and I glance at Lara, then Jayne, then back again.

  ‘How am I going to manage all those stairs?’

  ‘Don’t worry, Verity, we’ve thought of that,’ Jayne says. ‘You mentioned to Vikram about having the downstairs doorways wide enough for wheelchairs and pushchairs, and we realised it would take you a while to get your strength back.’

  ‘We’ve made it a fully disabled-accessible room,’ Lara interrupts. ‘Grab handles in the bathroom, walk-in shower with a drop-down seat, all the necessary rails everywhere.’

  ‘We thought you could use it until you were strong enough to live upstairs again. You’d have everything you needed.’

  ‘What about a kitchen?’ I break in.

  Jayne continues, ‘The kitchen for guest breakfasts is all ready. You can use that for yourself too, and you can get around every area downstairs in a wheelchair if you need to.’