Immortal Light: Wide Awake

by John D. Sperry

  Lucy held it apprehensively, feeling almost nothing by way of a bond. Benjamin attacked and Lucy raised her sword to parry, but there wasn’t as much confidence behind it. He advanced and she retreated. Though she knew how to retreat, she lost her footing and stumbled. He attacked and she parried a little more forcefully. It was taking her a lot longer to recall which tactics she needed to employ, but she did have them all in her head, and it was evident to Jack and Benjamin that the knowledge was there, just not as available as it had been.

  “That’s pretty good for one day. I think you actually absorbed a good deal of what you used on me the first time.”

  Jack walked over to Lucy, shaking his head and grinning. “This is totally new, Lucy. You have a new gift that we’ve never seen before.”

  “You seem to be able to access things that we can’t,” said Benjamin, “You made it to my haven, you gleaned my ability from my practice sword—it’s truly remarkable.”

  “I don’t know.” Jack had a curious look on his face. He walked over to a far wall and took down a long, curved blade that looked like the Katana sword that Peter carried. “This is Peter’s old practice sword. It was a gift to him a long time ago, and he used to use it all the time. See what you can do with that.”

  Lucy took the heavy sword and held it with both hands. She felt her light flowing into it and she could sense the blade getting stronger, but she couldn’t quite bond with it. She tried her other technique of talking to it, but the bond never happened.

  “Try swinging it around,” Jack suggested.

  Lucy raised the sword over her head but the weight was too much compared to the other practice sword, and her first swing turned into a flail that sliced a hole right through the mat.

  Jack looked at Benjamin, the curious look still on his face.

  “I don’t think she can do it with everything.” He paused and smirked at Benjamin. “I think it’s just you, Bro.”

  Chapter 20

  Lucy spent days in the basement practicing with Benjamin’s alternate sword, and at the end of each day she would walk over to her totem, place her hand on it as Jack had instructed her, and seemingly empty her light into it. She told Kat that it was like blowing out a lung-full of air as long as you could. Then each day before practice, she would reverse the process and extract everything she could, like taking a deep breath.

  As she worked with Benjamin and Jack, she could feel the techniques and the movements of sword fighting become clearer. It wasn’t just a series of movements that would mathematically counteract movements by an opponent; it was more like a conversation between two people in which a point begat a counterpoint until one was caught off guard. Lucy had learned to attack when appropriate and retreat when appropriate and, after a few weeks, she no longer depended on the practice sword for its knowledge. She had learned it well enough to challenge Benjamin on most days. While he was yet her superior in the ring, she had shown so much progress that one duel in ten she could beat him.

  Kat told Lucy that her arm muscles and leg muscles were a little more defined, and Lucy realized she was benefiting in more than one way from her self-imposed rigorous workouts.

  Lucy had spent every day doing one other thing. She would go to the hospital and visit her father. It wasn’t long before she had come to terms with the fact that her father might never recover from his coma, so she decided to make what she could of it. In his sleep-like state she would talk to him. She told him everything about her life and how it had changed. She talked about Benjamin and her new found prowess with a sword.

  Most importantly, however, she told him that she would never let her mother’s killer get away with what he had done. She was training to get revenge on the faceless extractor that had turned her mother into a helpless captive inside of him. She was training to kill.

  The days had gotten significantly colder. The Oregon coast was known for brutal winter punishment. The wind was bitingly harsh and the air was thick and wet. Citizens of Coos Bay were seen with jackets and windbreakers zipped up around their ears as they walked around the town. They would tolerate the conditions even without the satisfaction of snow.

  It was those days that Lucy was grateful for Kat’s parents’ generosity in allowing her a place to live, and especially Kat’s father’s skills as an attorney in taking care of the Higgins family estate, free of charge.

  After visiting her father on a particularly damp day, Lucy had picked Kat up from school. She had decided to take a break from public education and do correspondence home schooling for the rest of the year. She chalked it up to bereavement, when in actuality she was getting a completely different kind of education.

  Driving up the hill to the Raven home, Kat was jabbering on about how glad she was that she was free of school for two weeks due to Christmas break, and could finally spend more time with Lucy. It was obvious that Kat had taken a serious liking to Jack. She never forced the subject on Lucy, but it was plain to see where her affections lay. Benjamin had assured her that Jack didn’t harbor romantic feelings for Kat, and as long as everything stayed innocent, Lucy wasn’t going to butt in.

  “So, do you think my folks would let me stay up here for New Year’s Eve?” The question was a little absurd to Lucy.

  “You spend most of your time up here anyway, why would they care on New Year’s Eve?”

  “I don’t know, I was just wondering if they trust me up here with all these boys late at night.”

  Lucy could see that it wasn’t a question of Kat’s parents allowing it, she was trying to gauge whether or not Lucy knew anything about Kat’s chances of getting kissed that night.

  “I don’t see why they wouldn’t trust you; your track record is impeccably clean. Besides, it’s not like you have a boyfriend up here.” Lucy looked sideways at Kat, hoping to drive home her point.

  Kat’s smile turned to a grimace and she stared out the window as moisture streaked down it. She didn’t say another word on the subject and Lucy smirked inside, hoping she had thrown a bit of a curve ball into Kat’s game plan with Jack.

  Parked out in front of the house, Kat gathered her things, still pouting over the conversation. Lucy felt a little bit of remorse, so as a gesture of peace, she said to Kat,” Look, he’s like seven years older than you are.”

  “More like two thousand and seven,” Kat sneered.

  “Right, I mean, it would probably feel weird to him if you came onto him, being only sixteen, you know?”

  Kat smiled weakly at Lucy. “You’re right, I guess I was just being silly. C’mon, let’s get inside where it’s warm.”

  The two girls slammed their doors, huddled inside their jackets, and walked into the house.

  All three brothers were standing around the dining room table and Peter had large rolls of paper under his arms. As soon as he saw the girls, he left the room and exited out the back door toward the shop.

  “Is he alright?” Lucy asked as she hung up her coat.

  “Yeah, he just has lot on his mind right now,” replied Benjamin.

  The two girls sat down on one of the couches as Benjamin and Jack occupied two adjacent chairs.

  Lucy couldn’t stop thinking about how mysterious Peter was to her. She rarely saw him since their days building her haven. He had barely seemed like the same person. When she did see him, his conversations were so brief that she could never figure him out. He was always so nice, but he didn’t seem as open as his brothers.

  “What is Peter like? I can’t read him. He’s so much more different than you two.” Lucy’s question was direct, so Benjamin tried to answer as directly as he could.

  “His role is very different from ours,” he indicated between himself and Lucy and Jack. “He has a special calling that he doesn’t feel ready for.”

  “What is it?” asked Kat, as she stole a momentary glance at Jack.

  “He’s going to be the high priest of our people when we get back.” Benjamin said somberly.

  “What does that mean?�
�� Lucy had heard Benjamin talk of their father as being the high priest and she remembered something about going through a ‘transfiguration,’ but she still had no idea what any of it meant.

  “That means that he has very little time to master his control over the light. He can do things with it that we will never be able to do.” The girls were attentive to every word.

  “When Peter is ready, and he feels that he is far from being ready …”

  “He’s ready now, he just refuses to believe it,” interjected Jack, quite forcefully.

  Benjamin glanced at Jack before continuing. “When he’s ready, he’ll go through the transfiguration process that will change him from a weak conductor of life—like us—to a controller of it. Our father is the current high priest and he went through the transfiguration before becoming the high priest.”

  “What is the transfiguration?” Lucy softly asked.

  “I’ve never seen it done. But, according to Peter, who was fifteen and watched as our father went through the process, it is a brutal and difficult thing to experience.” Benjamin looked at Jack again who was subtly nodding with his eyes closed, as if in accord with everything Benjamin was saying.

  “The candidate lies on an alter in our central temple that we call The Tree. As he enters his haven, the reigning high priest pierces the candidate’s heart with a knife made of our purest gold. The candidate then experiences in his haven the worst parts of his own conscience. His worst fears become tangible like demons, and he must defeat them.”

  “He has to fight them off?” Kat asked automatically.

  “Sort of. He has to defeat them not by killing them with a sword, but by banishing them from his haven. It’s like cleansing his mind of all his own fears.”

  “What happens if he can’t do it?” Lucy asked.

  “If he can’t do it …” Benjamin looked to Jack.

  “If he can’t defeat his fears, then his fears defeat him and he dies.”

  Lucy and Kat shared a look of shock and sorrow knowing that Peter had to eventually experience the process.

  “How does Peter prepare for something like that?” Lucy asked.

  “He spends a lot of time in the Haven Room,” replied Benjamin.

  Lucy thought about her time in the Haven Room. She replayed the peace she felt in there, how she never wanted to leave it. Then she thought about Peter sitting in the room underneath the tree trying to train himself for the task he would eventually face, and her heart went out to him.

  “He can’t just die. How will he know he’s ready?”

  “He’s ready, trust me. He was father’s anchor, he knows what it takes.” Jack blurted out as he stood up from his chair.

  “What is an anchor?” Lucy asked.

  Jack gestured to Benjamin to explain. “Every candidate has what’s called an anchor. This is the person that is the candidate’s only link to the outside world. It is up to the anchor to remove the golden knife when the transfiguration is complete.”

  “What happens if the knife isn’t removed?” blurted Kat, having followed the entire conversation with rapt attention.

  “Until the knife is removed, the candidate is unable to come out of his haven. If the knife isn’t pulled within a certain window, the candidate can suffer. But we don’t really know what that means because no anchor has ever failed.”

  “But how do they know when to pull it?” asked Lucy.

  “They have to keep their hand on the knife the entire time; this could mean days sometimes. When it is time to pull the knife, they will feel it. But, if the anchor falls asleep or lets go for some reason, he could miss that window and the candidate could die.”

  “So Peter pulled the knife for your father, but how will he know he’s ready for the same thing?” Lucy asked.

  “Peter is amazing,” Jack interjected. “I’ve seen him do things that only our father could do. He can manipulate people’s desires, he can think more clearly than any of us, and his Haven is amazing. It’s not even a real place and it has more real-life detail than real-life. We can’t do that.” He waggled his finger between himself and Benjamin. “We can’t use the light like he can. He’s ready, trust me.”

  Jack walked out of the room and headed for the bookcase that lead to the basement. Kat tracked him as he left. When she looked to Lucy for permission to follow him, Lucy subtly shook her head, and Kat just stared in Jack’s direction.

  “He’s fine,” Benjamin said to Kat, noticing her distress. “He hates it when he thinks someone isn’t quite reaching their potential.”

  Kat simply smiled and tried not to look at the open door to the basement.

  “So, how does he know when it’s time?”

  “I don’t know what it’s like, but Peter will know when he’s ready. There are only two other people who can know for sure besides Peter; one is the high priest, and the other is the King, neither of which is here.” Benjamin’s words struck a new chord with Lucy.

  “What about the King; why aren’t you looking for a king?”

  Benjamin laughed at Lucy’s new train of thought. “Wow, I have to keep on my toes around you, don’t I?” He smiled at her as he answered her question. “The prophesy said very little of a king. We just assume he will be provided the same as the Queen. All we know is that the Queen will come. The fact is, a Queen is more important anyway. She is the nurturer.”

  Lucy wrinkled her forehead. “I don’t get it.”

  “I told you before that the King and Queen are like the parents of our people. The Queen is the nurturing element that intuitively understands the city. It is easier for her to lead the people because they are like her children and she knows what they need and how to get it. The King, on the other hand, is like a father; he leads by productivity and delegation. He is responsible for being a provider, a judge, and a protector. The King is usually responsible for the welfare of the people and the disciplinary judgments. He instills rules while the Queen instills values.”

  Lucy thought about how everything Benjamin had said was true for her own parents. Her father set the rules and enforced them, while her mother made sure Lucy knew how to be the best kind of person she could be. It made sense to her that while the city had a steward who could accomplish all of the things the King could accomplish, the missing element was the nurturing nature of the Queen.

  ***

  The next morning at eight o’clock Benjamin drove Lucy straight to the hospital. He didn’t want to leave her alone for very long for fear she would be found by reapers, so he made it his habit to drive her, and since Lucy loved his company, she never objected. He would usually stay in the car or run errands around town during her visits. He wanted to allow her time alone with her father. It was James’ birthday and Lucy wanted to spend as much time with him as possible. She was hoping to be the first person to visit him but as she walked into his room, she saw that she was late compared to another friend.

  On the wall above his bed was a large, colorful banner that read “Happy Birthday, James!” Gold and purple balloons were left in neat clusters in the four corners, and a life-size Kareem Abdul-Jabbar cut-out stood near the window wearing a “Happy Birthday” crown. The piece de resistance of the whole room was a replica of the 1987 Lakers championship banner that Lucy was certain hadn’t come from a catalog. Knowing Jack, it was the one he had purchased in 1987.

  A broad smile crossed Lucy’s face; it was one of the few times she had smiled in that room. She realized just how much she appreciated the timing of Jack’s levity. No matter how bad things seemed to get, he could always be counted on for a confidence boost or a laugh.

  Lucy sat down in her customary seat and pulled out a large birthday card that she had spent hours making the night before.

  “I’m sorry it’s so lame and homemade, but I just wanted to do something for you that was special.”

  Next, she pulled out a small wooden box. The inside was lined with blue velvet and in a small divot at the center was a golden disc the size of a
silver dollar. On it was a crude engraving of a heart with her parents’ initials. On the reverse side was a beautifully engraved picture in exact detail of Sunset Bay. Through the top was a small hole where a gold chain was attached.

  Placing the box next to James’ hand she said, “I asked Jack to help me make this for you. He ended up doing most of it when my etchings looked horrible, but … anyway. Here it is.” She let go of it and sat back in her chair and smiled at her father’s expressionless face. “Happy Birthday, Daddy.”

  As she reached over to pick up The Outsiders, James’ favorite book, to read to him, her cell phone started buzzing in her pocket. Looking at the screen she saw a number she hadn’t seen in months and frankly hoped she wouldn’t see for a very long time. She froze as the word Library beamed up at her. Through heart stopping seconds she battled with herself whether or not to answer it. She had no idea what to expect on the other end. The library had been closed since the entire front of it had been somehow blown off by reapers.

  Lucy didn’t know much about that night at the library. From visiting Mrs. Breen in her home, all she could gather was that Mrs. Breen thought she sensed someone behind her, thinking it was Kenny, but all she knew was that she passed out and woke up in the hospital feeling like she’d run a marathon.

  The phone had rung five times; on the sixth it would go to voice mail. She waited. The time between rings seemed like an eternity as she waited for her cell provider to make the decision for her. But as she felt the phone vibrate in her palm, she flipped it open and answered with a wary “Hello?”

  At first she heard nothing but noise, like wind blowing through a tunnel. Then she heard a quiet voice, like a sick person trying to speak through hoarseness.

  “Lucy?” The voice hesitated as if her name were a question.

  “This is Lucy.”

  “Lucy,” there was heavy breathing accompanying the hissing rasp of the speaker.