The Darkness Within Him: The Untwisted series

by Alice Raine

  Without us knocking, Nathan opened the door to his apartment almost immediately. He was dressed in smart navy trousers and a pale blue shirt that accentuated just how broad his shoulders were. The colour of his top was an exact match for the startling ice-blue of his eyes. Ridiculously, I gripped Nicholas’ hand tighter as I felt Nathan appraise me with a sweep of his gaze before he stood back and ushered us inside with a brisk wave of his hand.

  Oh wow! Clearly Nathan made as much money as Nicholas, if not more, because his apartment was stunning, and I mean breath-taking. The entire front wall of the lounge was made of glass, allowing the evening sun to stream in, warming the room and illuminating the elegantly stylish furniture that adorned it. The view over London was beautiful and I dawdled for a second to admire the last rays of sun glinting off the water of the smart dock area outside. As I turned back into the room, my eyes swept over the space again. Leather sofas of black and white surrounded a marble fireplace and rich, colourful rugs were spread across the floor; it was like a show home, but far, far better. It was such a contrast to my poky little flat that I found myself feeling just a tiny bit jealous.

  As we moved toward the sofas, Nathan introduced us to a woman who was standing by the door and appeared decidedly on edge.

  ‘Rebecca, this is Stella,’ he said, indicating the woman who seemed somehow slim but curvy at the same time, with bright green eyes and flowing blonde hair that fell to just below her shoulders. Nicholas had clearly met her before because he smiled at her and nodded his head in greeting, but he sent an odd look toward his brother that completely confused me.

  Nicholas and I sat down on a soft black leather two-seater and Nathan settled himself opposite us on the white couch. Stella was now hovering by the end like a frozen puppet. What a strange girl she seemed; she still hadn’t uttered a word. She was beautiful and her straight back indicated confidence but the posture of her neck made her seem uncomfortable because her eyes were downcast and her hands twisted nervously in front of her. As I studied her odd behaviour, everything dropped into focus for me with sickening clarity …

  Stella was Nathan’s submissive.

  Of course she was. Nicholas had already told me his brother always had a live-in sub and it was the perfect explanation for her odd behaviour.

  A small gasp left my lips at the realisation and I felt Nicholas tense next to me. Glancing at him, I found his eyes on me, a look of concern fluttering on his eyebrows as though he knew exactly what I was thinking. Oh wait … he did know exactly what I was thinking. He already knew about Stella, and knew exactly what role she played in his brother’s life. Great, apparently I was the only one in the dark.

  Our eye contact was broken as I heard Nathan shift on the white sofa. ‘Sit,’ he ordered softly, patting the seat next to him and looking up at Stella expectantly. She immediately sat down, perched on the front of the sofa cushion with her hands linked on her thighs, head slightly bowed and her eyes averted toward the floor.

  With sick fascination, I watched Nathan as he watched Stella. There was a flicker of something in his eyes: something that told me he had feelings for her, that he saw her as more than just a plaything, but what did I really know? I hardly knew him at all, and I certainly knew nothing about the intricacies of a relationship between a dominant and his submissive.

  Gently, Nathan placed a hand on Stella’s shoulder and pulled her back against the sofa so he was sitting with his arm lightly draped around her shoulders. As he did this, a tiny gasp escaped her lips and I felt my stomach twist uncomfortably. From her reaction, they had never sat together like this before, although ironically he had probably done all matter of intimate and pervy things to her in the bedroom.

  Jeez, this was so fucked up.

  ‘Eye contact is permitted,’ I heard him whisper in her ear and immediately she raised her eyes to his reverently, as if she worshipped him, a hint of a smile twitching on her lips.

  I blinked several times, trying to clear my head. I felt like I was watching some hugely intimate scene unravel before me. Obviously, the eye contact was a very big thing for Stella and it was actually making me feel quite uncomfortable to bear witness to it. Their gazes locked for a second or two before Nathan winked almost imperceptibly and then turned back to Nicholas.

  ‘So how was the traffic on your drive over today?’ he asked with an easy smile.

  How was the traffic? Really? Given the bizarre circumstances, I thought he might have wanted to talk about something different, although what exactly I expected I wasn’t sure. One thing was apparent, though: Nathan definitely appeared more laidback than when I’d met him last week, eyes wider and muscles more relaxed. Perhaps it was due to being on home territory or perhaps he’d properly accepted that I was dating his brother.

  As I thought this, his glance swept across to me and his eyes visibly narrowed for a split second as he looked at where my hand was clasped in Nicholas’. He seemed to have to force himself to relax, and I swallowed hard, the pressure hurting my throat. Yeah, so perhaps Nathan wasn’t my number one fan just yet, then.

  A horrible realisation dawned on me, distracting me from what Nathan may or may not think about me. Was this what Nicholas’ previous life had been like? He’d said he was different with me, so had he had submissives just like Stella hanging on his every word, doing his bidding like a good little girl or being punished if they didn’t?

  Fuck . The thought made me sick to my stomach. Fearing I might actually throw up, I practically threw Nicholas’ hand away and lurched to my feet, looking toward Nathan a little desperately, anger starting to build in my vision and making my head spin.

  ‘Can I use your bathroom, please?’

  I saw Nicholas frowning at me but I kept my eyes averted from him; I needed a minute to clear my head. And possibly be sick.

  ‘Sure – Stella, show Rebecca the bathroom, please, and bring back some drinks for us all afterwards,’ Nathan replied amiably.

  Was he telling Stella to get the drinks or me? Because with the way I was feeling right now, Nathan I-own-you Jackson could get his own fucking drinks and drown himself in them.

  Leading me away from the lounge into an equally opulent hallway, Stella opened a door to the left to reveal a large, spotless bathroom with white fittings and aquamarine towels. Gratefully, I staggered inside.

  ‘Thanks,’ I muttered. I slammed the door shut before Stella had a chance to utter even one word, and lurched toward the sink feeling decidedly unsteady.

  Breathe, I ordered myself, trying to gather my wits. Flicking on the tap, I scooped up a handful of water and splashed it on my face. The cool liquid seemed to help a little so I repeated the action and even dabbed some on the back of my neck before grabbing a towel and drying myself off. With the towel still gripped in my hand like a security blanket, I put the toilet seat down and sat with my head resting in my hands, trying to settle my spinning emotions. No more than ten seconds later, there was a quiet knock on the door.

  ‘Rebecca? Are you OK?’

  It was Nicholas. I closed my eyes and bit down on my lower lip but remained quiet. Was I OK? How could I be when I knew that not ten feet away Nathan sat with a woman who was at his beck and call like a frigging slave? This was so alien to me, so wrong …

  ‘Becky, baby?’ The concern in Nicholas’ voice was evident now, its pitch audibly higher. So, reluctantly, I stood up and opened the door so he could come in.

  Closing the door behind him, he stepped toward me. Unconsciously, I stepped back, knocking into the sink unit in the process. Now I was trapped, Nicholas persevered forward, cupping my face and forcing me to raise it so he could look in my eyes.

  ‘Becky, I’m sorry, I had no idea Stella would be here.’ He paused awkwardly. ‘Well, obviously, she pretty much lives here, but she’s never usually around when Nathan has guests. I don’t know why she is today.’ Nicholas dipped his head to place a gentle kiss on my lips, and even in my current foul mood, I felt my body respond to his touch and r
elax marginally.

  ‘Were you like that?’ I asked quietly, looking at his shirt buttons intently, my heart hammering in my chest as I awaited an answer I didn’t really want to hear.

  ‘No. I told you before I’ve never had anyone live with me. The women I was with were just …’ But his voice trailed off as he shifted uncomfortably on his feet.

  ‘Just for sex?’ I retorted sarcastically, looking at him with an unimpressed expression on my face. ‘So you didn’t control their whole lives, just their sex lives?’ I finished bluntly, not caring if I sounded like a jealous cow.

  Nicholas’ face hardened at my crudeness and his eyes narrowed. ‘Yes, exactly. But as I’ve told you, Rebecca, that’s in my past; please leave it there.’ After we’d glared at each other for several seconds, a huge sigh escaped Nicholas’ chest and I watched as his dominant expression faded. ‘You, and only you, are my future, Rebecca. Please believe me when I say that.’

  He might not be the world’s most emotionally open man, but when Nicholas chose to express his feelings, he always did it with so much skill that I almost found myself forgiving him and falling into his arms. Almost, but not quite: I wasn’t feeling quite that lenient tonight.

  Steadying myself, I attempted to rationalise the situation. I rubbed a towel over my face and blinked several times. I knew Nicholas was right, about us at least: his past was just that, past, and his continued declarations left me with no doubt about his feelings toward me.

  But Nathan, wow, that was a completely different story and the sight of him and Stella together was still sitting heavy in my stomach.

  Finally, I nodded. I knew Nicholas had made a lot of compromises for me so I should try to make some effort too. ‘I’m sorry,’ I relented. ‘It’s just a really peculiar situation for me. I’ll be fine,’ I assured him, hanging the towel back up and heading for the door.

  ‘Let’s go before they think we’re up to something in here,’ I joked, but my tone lacked its usual humour. Apparently, my bad mood hadn’t vanished just yet. Nicholas examined me intently, watching my face as if he could read it somehow and not looking overly thrilled by what he saw. At last, he nodded and followed me back out into the lounge, and I’m pretty sure he noticed that I didn’t touch him once as we rejoined the others.

  ‘Are you unwell, Rebecca?’ Nathan said directly as we re-emerged into the living area of his stunning apartment. I noticed someone had got me a glass of chilled white wine – no doubt Stella – and I picked up the drink, taking a much-needed sip.

  ‘I was a little dizzy,’ I lied, ‘but I feel much better now. I’m probably just hungry,’ I concluded with a smile that was my best attempt at convincing him.

  ‘Well, it’s just as well dinner is served, then,’ he replied, indicating the large dining table by the huge windows. Dinner with a view, and what a view, I thought, allowing my mind to slip away from Stella for a moment and absorb the sun setting over the London skyline as I took my seat. It really was quite breath-taking.

  My thoughts were brought back to earth with a bump as soon as Nathan spoke again, however. ‘Stella’s been working very hard to prepare us a nice dinner,’ he said as we took our seats around the table.

  I raised an eyebrow. From any other person, the comment wouldn’t have riled me, but knowing the situation here it annoyed me that Stella had prepared the dinner alone and not as part of a team effort, like most of the couples I knew would do. A small snort rose in my throat. God, she’d probably done it because Nathan had ordered her to, I thought sourly, shooting Nathan a frosty glance.

  Under the table, I felt Nicholas place his hand on my leg and give my knee a firm squeeze as if noting the return of my bad mood; not that it had ever really gone away. I made a conscious effort to shake it off, then glanced at him, giving a small nod to show that I would try to behave myself.

  As dinners go, I have to say Stella had excelled: beef Wellington, creamy mashed potatoes, broccoli, and deliciously rich gravy. It really smelt superb. As good as the food looked, though, I still couldn’t help but watch the interaction between Stella and Nathan with fascination.

  Initially, after placing all the food on the table, Stella stood staring at the tablecloth awkwardly, as if unsure how to proceed. Perhaps she was used to serving Nathan first, or maybe they never ate together and this was a first? Gosh, this was very peculiar, but luckily, Nicholas was on the ball and spoke quickly. ‘Shall we all just dig in?’ he enquired, apparently well aware that Stella was stuck about what to do next.

  ‘Excellent plan, brother,’ Nathan agreed, but I still noticed that Stella didn’t take any food until we had full plates.

  Once we all had a dinner in front of us, I tucked in but saw Stella sitting with her dinner untouched in front of her. Was she not even allowed to eat without permission? A bubble of anger rose in my throat and I realised I was dangerously close to saying something I might regret, but just then Nathan leant in close to her ear to whisper something too quiet for me to hear. I watched as Stella’s face lit up with a genuine smile of happiness: her eyes were actually twinkling and for the first time, I could see just how pretty she really was. He leant back a few inches then the two of them shared a lingering look that to any outsider would have given the impression of a lovestruck couple. Wow, how strange! Intrigued, I found myself wishing I knew what Nathan had said to her.

  Nicholas remained tense next to me throughout the meal; although I suspect he was merely reflecting my own mood. He did, however, touch my hand or leg whenever he had the opportunity, trying to relax me with his contact, I guessed.

  At one point when my hand lay next to my plate, Nicholas took hold of it and rubbed his thumb reassuringly across my skin, but I noticed that Nathan watched the action with a frown creasing his brows. As far as I was concerned, he could bugger off. I didn’t care if Nathan disapproved of us, and to prove this point, I gripped Nicholas’ hand and raised it to my lips, planting a swift kiss on his knuckles. My actions caused Nathan to narrow his eyes further but had the dual effect of causing Nicholas to grin and then blush, something I’m not sure I’d ever seen him do before.

  Unsurprisingly conversation was light. Stella did not really contribute, but I noted that she seemed to enjoy the interactions and her eyes genuinely shone as she watched the three of us chatting around her. It was a shame she didn’t open up a bit more, because from the few glimpses I caught of her personality, she looked like she might be quite fun to chat to.

  After we finished eating, Nathan nodded at Stella and she began to stack our plates. Inwardly fuming at Nathan for not making any effort to help, I stood up. ‘Let me help you clear the dishes, Stella,’ I offered, collecting the potato bowl and gravy boat and following her into the kitchen. Almost bumping into her as we passed at the sink, I gave her a reassuring smile before she caught my arm and stopped me returning to the dining area.

  ‘I can see your shock, Rebecca. I can tell you don’t approve of Nathan and me, but it’s not like you think. I want to be with him.’ She tipped her head to the side and smiled. ‘Actually, I chose this lifestyle by myself; you might not believe it but I sought him out and I like living this way,’ she explained simply, her green eyes burning into mine before she smiled at me and headed back toward the others.

  Wow. She’d actually sounded sincere, and she’d sought him out? I’d love to know more about what lay behind that story – and perhaps I shouldn’t be so quick to judge other people’s lifestyles, I thought guiltily. Suddenly, a flush of embarrassment rushed across my cheeks; if Stella had noticed my disdain then Nathan probably had too. Oh God, I’d already had enough of problems with Nicholas’ brother without adding to them with my insolence.

  I rinsed my hands in the sink, then I deliberately softened my shoulders and took several breaths to relax myself. Stella was apparently happy with her unusual set-up so it was really none of my business to interfere. I still had coffee and dessert to make a better impression, so I decided I would try my best to do just that
as I wandered back into the dining room, smiling my first genuine smile of the evening.

  Chapter Twenty

  The following morning, Nicholas and I were enjoying a lazy lie-in: me tucked under his arm and contentedly flopped across his chest while he rubbed soothing circles on my back. My bad mood from last night had dissipated; in fact, it had pretty much cleared after my quick chat with Stella when I’d realised I shouldn’t judge things on first appearances, but Nicholas had still been insistent that we needed make-up snuggling when we got home. Obviously, I hadn’t complained, although I was a bit sore between my legs now after all of yesterday’s action. Overuse, no doubt, and this from me, a girl who previously didn’t really like sex – who’d have thought it! I grinned to myself, I’d had so much sex I hurt, and I felt ridiculously proud of that fact. Gosh, I really had turned into a slut.

  Yawning cavernously, I turned my head as I heard the sound of a car crunching up the gravel driveway to the rear of Nicholas’ home. Intrigued, Nicholas gently removed me from the warmth of his arms, hopped from the bed, and pulled back a curtain to see who the visitor was.

  ‘It’s Nathan’s car,’ he commented, indicating a shiny Audi TT parking under a tree as I joined him at the window and slipped my arms around his warm, naked waist.

  I swallowed nervously as Nathan’s slicked blond hair emerged from the black car. Oh God. I hoped he wasn’t here to demand Nicholas dump me for my rude behaviour last night.

  Nicholas pulled on some jeans and a T-shirt – going commando, I noticed with a faint smile – before heading downstairs, but I took a little longer to dress, actually bothering to find some underwear and running a brush through my hair before trotting down to join them, delaying the expected confrontation for as long as possible.