Fading to Light

by Sarah Cole

  “I found out that a friend of someone had laced a bunch of drinks with some drug without people knowing. It was a shitty street version of ecstasy or something and Graham’s was one of them. A bunch of people got sick from it, but Graham was on some prescription drugs due to a football injury he was nursing. The two mixed was a lethal combination. I found out who the friend was and I couldn’t stop myself. The other was later that year after school started back up. I came home for a weekend that my parents were out of town to keep an eye on Cami. She was only fifteen, so they didn’t want her alone all weekend. She apparently snuck out without telling me, and I tracked her down at a house party. I caught some kid trying to force himself on her. Turns out he had already slipped something into her soda. I got there before he really got anywhere with her, thank God, but I was so angry and terrified of the situation and what happened to Graham that I honestly don’t even remember what happened. I just remember being pulled off the guy once I’d beaten the shit out of him.” I confess.

  “How’d you get your record expunged?” She asks.

  “Well it’s not really what you probably think.” I say.

  “Yeah my Dad represented me, but the DUI sentence didn’t stick because I wasn’t over the legal limit. So it was lessened to illegal consumption by a minor, and a failure to avoid accident citation.”

  “The charge against Connor was dropped after my Dad reminded the mayor of his many indiscretions that he kept trying to bury.” The guy was a total sleeze, it turns out.

  “Turns out the guy that spiked Grahams drink was a small time dealer part of a bigger ring, and he confessed to spiking the drinks at the party and got slapped with a manslaughter charge along with possession charges, and there were witnesses to what happened with my sister, including a cell phone video of him trying to force himself on her. After I pulled him off her, apparently he swung first so that was determined self-defense and he was later charged with sexual assault.”

  I feel like a hundred pounds has been lifted from my chest after telling my whole story to Charlie.

  “I love you, Andrew. So much it hurts. Thank you for sharing that with me. You shouldn’t feel guilty for anything. You didn’t hurt Graham. Maybe you made a few mistakes, but you were young. We all make mistakes, baby. You have to forgive yourself.” She says, brushing a lock of hair up off my forehead.

  “I love you too, sweetheart, and I’m trying. Thank you for listening.” I say before I lean in, slanting my mouth over hers. My heart is hammering as I lean over and pull her into my lap, her hands grabbing at my hair as our tongues meet in a passionate embrace.

  A short knock on the door startles us apart like two teenagers before Bev pops her head in the door. At seeing our current state, she gives us a knowing smile as a blush paints her cheeks.

  “Sorry to interrupt, but I just wanted to see if anyone had takeout suggestions. Your father is ransacking the pantry for snacks.” She says to Charlie.

  “Actually, I need to head back up north tonight. I have an early morning surgery scheduled that unfortunately can’t be cancelled, plus I’m on call for the rest of the week.” I say, wishing I could just stay here and hold my girl all night long.

  “Can I go with you?” Charlie asks me, like I’d actually say no.

  “Of course you can babe, but I won’t be able to come back until early next week like we had originally planned.” I warn her, as I wrap my arms around her small frame.

  “That’s fine. Honestly I have a ton of work I need to do for the band, and they are releasing a new single on Tuesday so I really should get back home to touch base at least for a few days.” She says.

  “Finally!” Bev says looking up towards the heavens dramatically, and I chuckle to myself.

  “Finally what, Mom? I’m offended.” Charlie says, putting a fist on her hip.

  “Finally you came to your senses. You two need some time alone to talk anyways. Just be back in a few days for our holiday bake fest and Christmas Eve like we planned. Pack what you need and your Dad and I can drive your car up to you this weekend if that’s ok?” she says to Charlie with a smile.

  “You can drive the loaner. I should have the Range Rover back from the auto body shop in a couple days anyways.” I say pulling her closer into my body, needing to feel her.

  “Ok, well I’ll go get my bag, but I’m keeping my PJ’s on.” She teases.

  “Baby, you look perfect in whatever you wear, so you rock those jammies.” I laugh and my heart soars. I missed this.

  Charlie and I talk all the way back to my apartment. We talk about everything that happened, and about how Tyler showed up and landed this on her and had someone investigate me. Obviously I’m pissed as hell, but in some ways I’m actually grateful to that asshole. I am not certain when I would have mustered up the courage to open up and tell Charlie everything. Tyler took that choice away from me, revealing the ugly truth, but in the end it solidified what Charlie and I have. So for that alone, I am thankful. Now I know that our relationship can withstand pretty much any shitty hand life can deal us and come out of it stronger.

  The guilt still tugs at the corner of my mind over Graham’s death, but in all honesty I haven’t ever felt lighter than I do in this moment. Recounting the entire story to Charlie was cathartic in a way that I never anticipated and much to my surprise has been nothing but loving. She admitted that she was jaded towards the situation on paper just based on everything she’s been through in the past year, but she was more hurt that I didn’t open up and talk to her. I don’t blame her one single bit either. Hell, I’ve hated myself every single day for the past ten years whether it was actually warranted or not.

  It feels like all the pieces are finally back in place as Charlie slides into bed beside me in her polka dot flannel pajamas.

  “Baby, as cute as you are in these jammies, you haven’t been in my bed for way too long and I need to feel you.” I say sliding my hand up her tight stomach as I nuzzle into her neck breathing in her warm scent. It curls around me like a blanket, putting me at ease.

  “Mmm, then maybe you should help me out of them.” She moans as she looks into my eyes, hers soft and full of lust, and my cock springs to life.

  I slide my arm under her body and pull her so she’s on top of me, nose to nose, just breathing each other in, staring into one another’s eyes. She dips her head to meet me as I slide my hands into her hair, gripping it at the roots, our lips meeting and parting, our tongues sliding against each other in a nearly frantic fashion. Having to taste more of her, all of her, I find myself licking, sucking, and biting my way down her neck as she lets out a soft moan. She reaches down between us struggling to rid herself of her clothing, and my God, the feeling of her skin against mine sends a burning need through my body. I roll us over so I can kiss my way down her beautiful body, her hands find my hair and guide me lower.

  I find the edge of her panties and slide them down her thighs, placing a kiss between each one before settling between them. I tease her with my tongue, sucking her clit between my lips, and lapping up her wetness. So fucking sweet.

  “God baby, you taste so fucking good. I missed you so much.” I say between licks and kisses, and in no time her body shutters as her thighs clamp around my head, her hands pulling my head urging me back up to hers.

  “I love you so much Charlie, don’t leave me again.” I say, taking her mouth.

  “Never.” She pants.

  “Babe, I need you inside me. Now.” she breathes, and I don’t need told twice. Just as I’m about to slide into her I remember the condom.

  “Shit baby, hang on. I have to get…” but I’m cut off.

  “Stop, its OK. We know we’re both safe, and my chances of getting pregnant are slim anyways.”

  “I know babe. I’d want all the babies you could give me; I’m not scared of that. I just wanted you to be sure.” I say sliding my length along her wet folds, nearly going insane with want.

  “I’m positive, nothing between us. No
t anymore.” she says as she arches her hips to meet mine.

  “Thank fuck.” I say as I slide into her, her warm heat squeezing me. I start pumping into her slowly wanting to savor every single second of it, but before I know it she’s meeting me thrust for thrust, her sounds of pleasure spurring me on.

  “God, yes. Harder. Feels. So. Good.” She pants out between thrusts, and I’m so close.

  “Baby. I can’t hold on much longer, you feel too good. Are you close?”

  “Fuck yes!” she screams, as her walls pulse around me, sending me over the edge in my own release.

  I collapse onto her burying my face in her neck, kissing my way up to her mouth.

  “You have such a filthy mouth, but I love it.” I say into her ear, seeing goosebumps surface on her skin and she giggles. It’s the sweetest sound I’ve heard in weeks.

  I move to pull out of her, but her grip tightens around me. “No, just stay here. I just need you.” she says into my neck. So I settle us both on our sides, still joined in every way imaginable and I drift off to a deep sleep for the first time in a while.

  A few hours later I wake to my alarm, and I feel Charlie stirring beside me. I turn off my alarm and roll over to pull her closer to me when she rolls over placing her head on my chest, right where I am planning on tattooing her name as soon as I can get an appointment.

  “Good morning baby. I say combing her hair with my fingers. Go back so sleep. I have to get up for rounds.” I kiss her nose and she groans stretching.

  “What time is it?”

  “Just after five.” I say.

  “I may as well get up then. I have so much work to catch up on and I need to check in with Laney before she goes to work.” She sighs.

  An idea crosses my mind. “Go to dinner with me tonight? I never got to see you in that pretty dress.” The truth is, I was going to propose that night. I had everything all planned, then in an instant everything changed. Now I just feel like it isn’t quite the right time. Actually I know it wasn’t because we still had some many demons tormenting us.

  “I’d like that, but I do have a request.” She says.

  “Anything.” I say, and I mean it. I would give this girl anything she ever wanted or needed.

  “I know it isn’t exactly the most romantic way to spend the evening, but I was texting Jay last night and there’s this band playing at The Bottom Lounge tonight and he wants me to check them out to see if they are any good live. They are looking for an opener for summer.”

  “Yeah sweetheart. You know I love music and I’ll be with you so it’s just an added bonus.” I say continuing to run my fingers through her hair.

  “They might meet us later on, but they are re-shooting part of a music video so we’re not sure if they will be out in time to make the show.”

  After Charlie and I enjoy a beautiful dinner at Everest overlooking the city lights, we make our way to the West Loop to watch some bands play. Charlie looks absolutely stunning in a black, form fitted sleeveless dress and jacket with a giant bow at the collar. Her sky high heels make her tanned and toned legs look a mile long, and her hair is in a simple, loose knot at the nape of her neck. I can’t stop staring at her. I love how she can be so pretty and feminine, but yet she always has this trendy rock and roll vibe that is so unique to her it just reels you in. Every male head in this place has given Charlie a double take and then some. I grab her hand and wrap my arm around the small of her back hoping to ward of anymore lingering stares in her direction.

  “Babe, people are staring. We look ridiculous in a suit and cocktail dress.” She hisses through her teeth, unbuttoning her jacket.

  “Baby, they aren’t staring because you look ridiculous. They are staring because you look sexy as hell.” I say pulling her closer.

  “Oh hush.” She squeezes my hand. “Come on, let’s get up a little closer to the front so I can get a better video.”

  We make it to our spot in the crowd just before the band begins to play. I wrap my arms around Charlie from behind while she videos on her phone. The band is actually really good, and we are enjoying ourselves, lost in each other and the music. The band is taking a five-minute break, but I don’t let my girl go.

  “You two just don’t fucking quit do you?” a familiar voice sneers, as both of our heads whip in the same direction.

  “Tyler. Man, just leave us alone. We’re not looking for any trouble.” I say, trying my best to keep my cool in check. He’s obviously intoxicated, and I don’t want to aggravate the situation any further.

  “Too fucking late, Doc. You came looking for trouble when you fucked my girl. You’d think you would have given up by now between your busted ride and me spilling your dirty secrets; more trouble than she’s worth really. You two are just gluttons for fucking punishment.” He slurs, trying to take a swipe at me. If my ears served me right, I swear he just admitted to trashing my car. I gently pull Charlie behind me before I take a step forward.

  “Did you actually just admit to trashing my Range Rover?”

  “Who the hell else? Figured after everything you’d get sick of her and all the bullshit, and she’d have no choice but to come back to me. Hope you loosened her up a bit for me. She’s lucky I had places to be that day I came to the apartment, otherwise I would have been more than happy to take her for a spin around my cock.” he cracks, and I don’t even think I just strike with a swift punch right to his nose where I know is still broken, and he drops to his knees instantly.

  “First, never fucking think about her again you twisted asshole. Second, you should probably make sure you aren’t being recorded before you confess to your crimes, genius.” I say looking over at Charlie who is still holding her phone angled at us with a triumphant smirk.

  “Got it?” I ask her.

  “Every single second. Can we go now?” she asks, looking around her as the crowd starts to gather around us.

  “Gladly.” I say lacing my fingers through hers and guiding her around the pathetic heap on the floor.

  Chapter 24

  Charlie:

  The past few days with Andrew have been amazing. We were always close, an instant magnetism drawing us together from the very start, but now we were connected by something so much larger. I hadn’t realized there was any tension hanging between us before, but revealing our pasts and secrets to one another has dissolved any lingering hesitation, leaving only trust and love in its wake.

  After our last encounter with Tyler, we handed over the video evidence of his confession to vandalizing Andrew’s SUV. We also explained the other altercations we’ve had with him. Combined with the unofficial report of mine from the day of the accident, that was enough to warrant an arrest. Yesterday we found out that he would also be charged with criminal stalking due to the disturbing evidence they found inside his apartment.

  Apparently Tyler had been following me since shortly after our breakup, but after the altercation with Andrew at Warehouse, it became serious. He had also managed to obtain a firearms permit, so that was even more disturbing. Upon questioning it also came to light that Tyler had a history with mental illness in his teenage years, but refused to continue treatment throughout college. I think after that phone call, Andrew and I were both able to take a deep breath as the final piece was glued into place, and Tyler would be getting the treatment he so badly needed.

  We’re packed up and headed down to my parents’ house once again, Christmas Eve being tomorrow, and I can feel Andrew’s nerves growing beside me.

  “You don’t have to be nervous. You know they already love you.” I try to ease the anxiety, patting his thigh. His hand moves down from the steering wheel, clasping mine before bringing it to his lips.

  “I’m not nervous baby.” He says, but I don’t believe him for one second. I give him the side eye.

  “Promise.” He stresses. “I’m just really excited.” He smiles at me.

  “Me too! Oh your Mom gave me your grandma’s gingerbread recipe! She said you guys always m
ade that Christmas Eve, so hopefully it will feel somewhat like home.”

  “Home is wherever I’m with you, Charlie.” He says smiling at me tenderly before turning his eyes back to the road.

  “Same here baby.” I say letting it all sink in.

  Christmas Eve is a big celebration in our house. Sure we open up gifts and stockings on Christmas morning with a yummy breakfast and mimosas, but Christmas Eve for the Adams’s is where the fun is. Lots of food, games, movies. Then everyone goes to bed in matching jammies that a designated family member choses. Cheesy? Yes. One hundred and fifty percent, but I love it.

  This year Kate and her husband, Alec, got to choose pajamas, and I am absolutely dying at the thought of my Dad and Andrew in these. They are adult long johns with elf on the shelf all over them. I can’t wait to see Andrew’s face. My Mom sent him and my Dad out hours ago on errands, but they have yet to return.

  “Where’d you send them, the equator?” I ask my Mom, popping a mini quiche in my mouth.

  “Just around. Maybe your Dad is showing him around town or they are doing some last minute shopping.” She shrugs brushing some mini wings with barbeque.

  “I know, but it’s starting to get dark.” I say peering out the kitchen window.

  “Oh calm your tits.” Kate says walking into the room, tossing her purse on the counter, Alec following.

  “Katherine…” my Mom scolds.

  “Mother…” she mocks.

  “All my favorite sassy ladies in one room! Can I help with anything, Bev?” Alec says messing up my hair and I flip him off when my Mom turns around and he just sticks out his tongue. He’s such a nut, but I love him just like he was my own brother. I love even more that he and Andrew have become instant friends. They have a serious bromance going on.

  “Yes. You can get these two out of my kitchen.” She says motioning to my sister and I as we feign offense.

  “Well I’m just going to go get changed before Grandma and Grandpa get here then.” I say heading towards the stairs.