Book Woman

by Ivan B

  “Sorry Josie, did I frighten you.”

  She didn’t need an answer as it was written all across Josie’s face. Mary reached out to touch her.

  “Did I scream?”

  Josie nodded, still obviously frightened. Mary wondered what to say and decided on the truth.

  “I had a nightmare.”

  Josie looked bewildered and her eyes opened wide.

  “Was it full of scary animals?”

  Mary smiled.

  “No. You know I had a bad accident, sometimes I dream of it and it frightens me.”

  Josie’s face changed from fear to concern.

  “Daddy says that dreams are our brains way of emptying it’s trash can, just like a computer, and that I’m not to worry about nightmares.”

  Mary gently ruffled Josie’s hair.

  “That sound very sensible to me.”

  Josie gave Mary an anxious look.

  “Are you alright now?”

  Mary considered her answer.

  “I am for the moment Josie, but I can’t promise that I won’t have another nightmare.”

  Josie suddenly threw her arms around Mary and Mary cuddled her, knowing that she had severely frightened Josie and that she was only a child. She stayed with her arms around Josie until Josie’s breathing became even and regular, she then carefully untangled herself and rolled over. She whispered out a prayer.

  “Look God, I know that nightmares might be part of my lot and I can cope with that, but please please don’t let me frighten Josie again, it’s not fair on her. I’m not asking for you to take my nightmares away, just stop me screaming when I’m with her.”

  She suddenly realised that she was crying, but she was not sure why. Was she crying for the sudden loss of her youthfulness, for frightening Josie or her fear of the future? She fell asleep with the tears still on her face.

  Robert was walking with Marcia through a restaurant, he could see men ogling Marcia as they passed by, but he didn’t care as Marcia was on his arm. They ate sashimi and laughed with each other. They walked home in the moonlight and he became terribly sick, he looked up to see Mary looking at him and telling him that’s what you get for eating raw fish in horseradish sauce. He wanted Marcia, he wanted a pretty woman on his arm, he didn’t want Mary and her prickly manner. He hunted around the house and found a note with a small silver chain attached, it just said ‘goodbye.’ He ran through the house, he didn’t want to be alone, but Marcia had gone. He ran out of the house and down the road and straight into the local fishmonger. Mary dumped a piece of cod on the marble counter and told him to cook it properly. Josie popped up beside her and they both started looking at a strange picture on the wall. He walked through the counter and saw that it was a picture of his wedding, but Marcia looked at him from the picture and waved goodbye, she left without blowing him a kiss. He looked back in the shop and it had become a park with Josie and Mary dancing in the sunlight, holding each other’s hands, leaning back and twirling round singing ring-a-ring-a-roses. They suddenly fell down and the green grass became a white settee with the two of them sleeping peacefully, Stephen whispered in his ear, ‘sensible is fine by me’ and the room swallowed him up. Robert turned over in his sleep, the dream would be unremembered, but the thoughts were in his head.

  Josie dreamt of living in an American orphanage and of singing and dancing with the other girls, especially Aruna. Finally they was rescued from the orphanage by Mary and taken to a huge house where her father lived, and everyone was happy, including Betrum the bear.

  Mary woke first and a full bladder compelled her to take a trip to the bathroom; from there she went into the silent kitchen and made herself a coffee, it was only 6am. She sneaked back into bed and, not feeling tired, picked up the book on prayer that she was reading. Josie woke up an hour later and found Mary propped up on some pillows fast asleep with a book on the covers. She reached over and picked the book up. The print was closely packed, there were no pictures and it looked boring. She read the back cover and then read it again. If she understood correctly it said that God answered prayer and that you should be honest with him and tell him what was on your mind. She smiled and whispered to the ceiling.

  “Please make Mary happy and stop her having nightmares and please make her stay with us.” She thought a little. “And please don’t be angry with Aruna that she doesn’t go to my church.”

  She carefully placed the book back on the bed and picked up her Space Journey book. She’d read it at least twice, but it was a special book.

  Mary woke up some fifteen minutes later and felt Josie fidgeting beside her. She sat up, Josie smiled and Mary pointed to the book.

  “Still reading that?”

  Josie nodded.

  “Why do they call something that is very very large a dwarf just because it’s red?”

  Mary gave a sleepy grin.

  “That’s one for you father.”

  She looked at the clock and whispered.

  “Why don’t we get up quietly and cook you dad a breakfast?”

  Josie made to scamper for her own room and Mary stopped her. Mary handed Josie a small purple paper carrier bag.

  “I saw these in a shop and thought that you might like them.”

  Josie opened the bag and pulled out a lightweight honeydew coloured sport’s top with a small anteater motif and thin chartreuse coloured edging; her eyes practically bulged.

  “For me?”

  Mary nodded.

  “Feel it.”

  Josie rubbed it between her fingers.

  “It feels so soft.”

  Josie peered in the bag again and pulled out some grey slacks.

  “Can I wear them today?”

  “Of course, but be sure to wear your white trainers with them.”

  Josie became suspicious.

  “Why?”

  “You’ll see, now go and have a proper shower, not one of your five second jobs.”

  Josie shot off like a jack-rabbit and Mary made her way to the bathroom. Fifteen minutes later Mary was fastening her knee brace when Josie burst in. Mary opened her mouth and Josie exited and knocked on the door. Mary said formally.

  “Come in.” and Josie re-entered.

  She looked at the knee brace.

  “What’s that?”

  “I bought it yesterday, it stops my knee from going all wobbly.”

  Mary rolled down her slacks and stood up, Josie fairly bounced up and down.

  “You’ve got the same clothes as me!”

  Mary held her finger to her lips.

  “Sssh, don’t want to wake your dad do we?”

  Mary pointed to her snow white shoes and then to Josie’s grubby white trainers.

  “And I think they could do with a clean, don’t you?”

  Josie left for her bathroom and Mary sat down, the knee-brace didn’t feel right. She rolled up her trouser leg and sought out the pencil mark on her leg, she was about quarter of an inch out. She re-aligned her knee brace, rolled down her slacks and looked in the huge dressing table mirror. The mirror displayed a woman sitting all alone in a huge bedroom and Mary suddenly, and inexplicably, burst into tears. She mopped them up and pulled herself together as Josie reappeared.

  “Clean enough?”

  “They’ll do.”

  Josie looked at Mary’s face and was about to say something when Mary reached out.

  “Now, how about a squirt of perfume?”

  Robert was woken by Josie some while later and solemnly informed that breakfast was ready. He nodded and his head responded by pounding mildly he ran his tongue round his mouth, which felt full of sawdust and he longed for another hour in bed. However, he managed to stand up a and stagger to the kitchen via the bathroom, where he ran his head under a cold shower for a full minute. Once in the kitchen he had a sense of déjà vu; yesterday it had been the same hair-colour, today it was matching outfits. He gulped down some coffee and said to Josie.

  “New outfit?”

&nbs
p; She did a twirl.

  “Brill isn’t it?”

  She came close.

  “Just feel the top, it’s so soft.”

  Mary placed scrambled egg on toast on the table.

  “Just you remember my girl, hand wash only or on the most delicate setting on your washing machine.”

  Robert eyed the scrambled egg with suspicion and then decided that it would be for the best. Mary suddenly tucked a piece of kitchen towel into Josie’s top rather like an impromptu napkin.

  “Don’t want tomato ketchup on your top do we?”

  Before Josie could protest she stuck a piece of kitchen roll in her own top and started to eat.

  When breakfast was over Josie went to her bedroom for something and Robert turned to Mary.

  “How much for the clothes?”

  Mary shook her head.

  “They’re on me.”

  Robert tried to put his brain in gear and said quietly.

  “I didn’t ask you here to spend your money on my daughter.”

  Mary stopped rinsing out the cups and replied softly.

  “I enjoyed buying them, please don’t deny me a little retail therapy, I don’t have many pleasures in life.”

  Robert wondered how to respond as Mary thrust another cup of coffee under his nose.

  She sat down and whispered.

  “Please don’t think that I’m trying to buy my way into Josie’s heart, because I’m not. I really did enjoy buying the clothes for her.”

  Robert reached out and put his right index finger through her steel hook; she obviously couldn’t feel his touch, but the casual action sent a momentary frisson through her heart. He said gently, and with feeling.

  “I’m not accusing you of anything of the sort, you don’t need to buy your way into Josie’s heart, we both know that. It’s just that I don’t want you to be out of pocket because of my daughter.”

  He watched her carefully.

  “Look, let me give you some money to take Josie shopping tomorrow. She needs some new casual clothes, a party dress for her friend Aruna’s birthday party and some school shoes, black is obligatory. I’m sure you’ll make more appropriate choices that I would”

  Mary gave a Robert a stunning smile and caught him totally unawares.

  “I’d love to take her shopping, but you get the change.” She smiled again. “That is if there is any.”

  Josie burst back into the kitchen and saw her father withdraw his hand from Mary.

  “I’m ready,” she said.

  Mary looked at Robert, who gave a weak smile.

  “I think it will be a morning in the open air; Hyde Park, Buckingham Palace and the Serpentine.”

  Mary almost laughed, but managed not to, perhaps his evening out with an old friend was having more than a few hangover effects.

  “What about the afternoon?”

  He shrugged, Mary helped him out.

  “How about the Natural History Museum? I love that place and haven’t been there for years.”

  He leapt at the idea.

  “Great, we’ll come back here and then all leave for the museum.”

  Mary took away his empty cup.

  “Will you want a snack?”

  Robert gave her a indecisive look and she added.

  “I don’t mind getting something easy and cold. So you come back at what time you want.”

  Robert felt his stubble.

  “Shave first Josie my girl and then we’re off. You give Mary a hand with the plates, remember she is our guest and should not be doing all the work.”

  Josie made a face, but still came over to help Mary clean up. Mary handed her a spray bottle of wipe-down disinfectant and wordlessly they started working together. Robert beat a hasty retreat, he still could not really cope with the sight of them standing side by side in identical outfits. It looked too much like mother and daughter.

  Chapter 13

  I can't do it by myself

  Just after they had left the doorbell rang and Mary found Jake at the door.

  “Special delivery from Mr Forbes.” He said holding out a small pile of parcels.

  She took in the parcels and almost burst into laughter. The parcels contained an electric carving knife, a ultra lightweight metal stool, a family of four teddy-bears, a lightweight bath-lifter and a swish toaster with a note affixed that read, ‘proper brown toast - guaranteed, I hope!”

  She muttered about some people being overtly efficient and distributed some the goods around the flat before sitting down and rattling of a thank-you e-mail to Stephen and added a list of suitable children’s books. She tried out the toaster, had another cup of coffee and took the ultra-thin lightweight stainless steel bath-lifter into the bathroom. This one was not hydraulic, but worked on a screw and ratchet principle. She sat on the toilet seat and looked longingly at the bath. Her mind made up she collected her toiletries, placed the bath lifter in the bottom of the bath and started running the water.

  One long relaxing whirlpool bath later she reached over the edge of the bath and picked up the bath-lifter that she had left propped up against the outside of the bath. It was so thin and light she’d been able to extract it from underneath herself and enjoy the full effect of the water-jets. She shuffled it underneath her, made sure that she was sitting squarely on the narrow seat and started moving the lifting lever back and forth. She rose no more than two inches before there was a muffled bang from under the water and she dropped to the bottom of the bath. She inspected the device to find, to her horror, the long threaded screw drive had broken between the ratchet and the seat levers. Basically it had become a useless piece of junk. She threw it over the edge of the bath in disgust before pulling the plug and letting the water out. When talking to Stephen the previous night she had not been quite truthful, in theory she did have a way of getting out of the bath, but she had not actually had to use it in anger since her physiotherapist had shown it to her years ago. The theory was simple if somewhat undignified: roll onto her front, wriggle until her feet were against the end of the bath, use mainly her arms to push herself up into a crawling position with her weight on her good knee, grab hold of the edge of the bath with her right hand and pull herself across to lean over it; then lift her weak leg over the edge of the bath , sit upright astride the bath lip and finally swing the good leg out of the bath. That should leave her sitting on the edge of the bath. The trouble was she had only ever done it once, found it excruciatingly painful for her left knee and had practised it in a shallow plastic bath. She sat composing herself and mentally running through the routine. Finally she grabbed her towel, folded it into a pad and lay back to roll over onto her front. She pushed herself up onto her good knee with the towel underneath it and balancing her weight between that and her left forearm; she reached over for the edge of the bath. He left forearm promptly skidded across the bottom of the bath causing her to fall back onto her front and bang the side of her eye against her arm. She took a deep breath, she had practised in a dry bath with much more friction between arm and bath. She lay in the bottom composing herself again, determined not to be beaten. Once again she pushed herself up into the crawling position and this time much more carefully balanced her weight between forearm and knee. She reached out for the edge of the bath and grabbed hold of it, as soon as she tried to transfer her whole weight to her knee to get fairly upright and be able to lean over the bath edge she knew it was a probably no-go. Last time it had been like crawling onto the bath-lip, this time it was more of a climb and the knee was screaming in protest. She managed to get her right armpit over the bath-edge, but then she had no leverage to pull herself the extra few inches to be able to effectively lay her rib-cage where her armpit now was. In the end, after a few excruciating seconds, she let herself tumble back into the bath. She pounded the bottom of the bath in sheer frustration. She lay there for a few moments and muttered to herself ‘is there a plan B?’ She recalled a talk she had had once with a young wheelchair bound girl; she’d got o
ut of the bath once by placing her bath-lifter over the taps at an angle and shuffling up it as if it were stairs. However, she had had fearsome upper body strength and in any case Mary had been sitting the wrong way round and the bath lifter was now out of reach. However ignominious it was, she’d have to wait until Roger returned. In truth she was too frightened about damaging her one and only good knee to try anything else. She rolled over and got herself back into a seated position. She put the bath-plug back in and decided that while she waited she might as well have another bath, she had nothing else to do.

  While Mary was trying unsuccessfully to extricate herself from the bath Robert and Josie were sitting beside the Serpentine Lake eating ice-creams. He felt much better after time in the open air. He watched a duck and said casually to Josie.

  “Enjoying the holiday.”

  She took her nose out of the giant double cornet with strawberry topping.

  “Brill.”

  He watched her for a second.

  “Don’t you dare get any of that strawberry topping down your new top, Mary would kill me.”

  Josie smiled.

  “No she wouldn’t, but she might tell you off. She’s good at telling people off.”

  Robert shuddered at the thought.

  “Are you glad we invited Mary?”

  She nodded eagerly. Robert tied a different tack.

  “Do you think she’s enjoying it?”

  Josie stopped eating and looked at her father over an unstable pile of ice-cream.

  “I think so, but she was crying this morning.”

  Robert watched her eyes.

  “Crying? Are you sure?”

  Josie nodded causing the ice-cream to wobbly dangerously.

  “She didn’t want me to know, but she was all red-eyed.”

  Robert was baffled.