by Sky Corgan
“So, show me your ring,” Tammy requested, at least trying to make an attempt at being excited for me. When I held my hand out, she gave the ring a weak smile. “Wow. That's definitely something Dominick would pick out.”
“I like yours better,” I confessed, “but I couldn't bare to tell him that.”
The diamond in Tammy's engagement ring had been cut round while mine was square. I thought the boxiness of my ring made it look a little old fashioned. Dominick had picked it out though, so it was special to me.
“It's a pretty ring,” she told me.
“I like it.”
“So, when did the two of you get engaged?”
“He proposed to me a few nights ago.”
“I must admit, I'm a bit curious about how all of this started.”
“Well.” I scratched the back of my head. “I've always liked Dominick, ever since we were kids, you know. When he said I could move in with him to go to college, I was kind of hoping something like this would happen. And, it did.”
Tammy nodded slowly. “So, it just happened?”
“Yeah. It just happened.”
“And you didn't tell me because?”
“Because I thought you would freak out.”
“I am kind of freaked out.”
“I can tell,” I laughed nervously.
“Dominick is a lot older than you.”
“I'm well aware of that.”
“That doesn't bother you at all?”
“Not in the least. Age doesn't matter. He's good to me. He takes care of me. He goes above and beyond to make sure I'm happy. And I love him.”
She sighed, “I'm going to be blunt, Kim. I think it's a bad idea for you to marry him.”
“I figured you would.”
“I know you don't care about the age difference now. It really doesn't matter right now. You're both still young. But eventually, it's going to matter.”
“I already know what you're going to say. He's going to get old, and I'm going to have to take care of him. I get that, and I'm fine with it. It's the least I can do after everything he's done for me. And besides, I love him. Isn't that what you do for someone you love, regardless of age? I could get cancer tomorrow, and he'd have to take care of me. Or he could die before he even has the chance to get old. What's the point of worrying about the future when the future is unpredictable?”
“Because realistically, he's going to die before you.”
“You don't know that.”
“I do, but I can see that you don't care, so let's go over some other reasons why I think it's a bad idea.”
“Like what?”
“Like the fact that you can't have a normal relationship because of who he is and your age difference.”
“I thought we weren't going to talk about age anymore?”
“Well, this kind of ties into that.”
“If you're wondering if Dominick and I have the same relationship that I would have with someone who is my own age, the answer is obviously no, and I'm fine with that too. I'm not losing out on life by being with him. I still go out with my friends and do normal college stuff, and Dominick and I do our own thing. It's kind of like having two separate lives, and I like it that way.”
“What about his profession though? Dominick is on his way to being very famous. Once the movie comes out . . . It just might be hard to be with him. The fame could get to his head. It could change him.”
“Pfft,” I laughed incredulously. “Do you know how hard it is for me to get him to even go to the parties that have been thrown for his books and the movie? His publicist literally approached me to talk him into going. If there's one person I'm not worried about fame changing, it's Dominick. Besides, he's already famous, and it doesn't put any strain on our relationship.”
“You don't worry about him cheating when he goes on business trips without you?”
“I did at first, but not anymore. Dominick is like a puppy. He loves unconditionally. Does he look at other women? Sure. He's a guy. But I know he doesn't go there, and that's all that matters to me.
“Trust me, him and I have already been through the typical relationship pit falls, trust issues and what not. We're both jealous people. We both love each other to a stupid level. Neither one of us would screw that up by cheating.
“Come on, Tammy, you know Dominick. He's a great man. Almost perfect. Can't you just be happy for us.”
“If he was perfect, that thing with his little cousin wouldn't have happened,” she grumbled.
“It's not his fault. He was just trying to help someone out, the same as he has with you and I in the past. I'm sure he didn't expect it to backfire.”
“Well, it did.”
“Yes, it did, and we can't change that. All we can do is move on from it.”
“I'm always going to be angry at him for that.” Tammy wrapped her arms around herself, looking away from me.
“Why? It didn't happen to you. I've gotten over it already.”
She sighed, “I don't like this.”
“You don't have to like it. You just have to accept it.”
Chapter 14: Dominick
Kim seemed to be in a good mood when she got home, so I could only assume things had gone well. She beamed at me when she entered my office, and I smiled back, pushing away from my keyboard to take her into my arms.
“Everything is going to be alright,” she said with a content sigh.
It was all the invitation that I needed to initiate some physical celebration. Squeals of joy turned into moans of pleasure as we fucked on the floor of my office. Part of me felt bad for being unable to control myself. Kim always ended up with rug burn on her back and knees afterward, but she never complained. She was good to me like that.
We decided that she'd move back into my bedroom after the wedding. Due to her trauma from the experience with Jeff, I hired an interior decorator to come in and redo some things to make the room have less of a haunting memory for her. I had the walls repainted an eggshell white with a gray trim, and I had the furniture removed and replaced, along with all the artwork. It probably could have waited until closer to the wedding, but I hated the idea of the room being an unpleasant reminder every time she walked into it.
Everything seemed to be going well—too well. Soon, Kim would be my wife, and I wouldn't have to worry about losing her anymore. Tammy was getting over her anger at me. The condo was getting a makeover. And my writing was surprisingly on deadline.
I was tapping away on my keyboard one day when I heard a knock on the door. Thinking it was one of the contractors, I simply yelled for them to come in. Several minutes later, I looked up to an unexpected sight. Tammy was leaning on the door frame, watching me with a plain expression.
“Tammy.” I greeted her as I swiveled my chair around to stand.
“Don't get up. I just wanted to stop by and talk to you for a little while before Kim gets home.”
“I need to get away from the computer anyway,” I told her, getting up to lead her into the living room. “Something to drink?”
“No. Thank you,” she replied, taking a seat on the loveseat opposite from me. “You know, you really shouldn't leave your front door open like that. That's just an invitation for unsavory characters.” Tammy scowled, causing a wave of guilt to roll through me.
When I was alone, I never worried about Jeff. Any retaliation he may have had, I was convinced I would be able to handle. Besides, it was easier for the contractors to come in and out as they needed to, easier for the both of us. Constantly having to get up to answer the door was distracting and frustrating for me.
“So, what do you want to talk about?” I asked, quickly getting the impression that this wasn't a friendly visit.
“I don't want you marrying my sister,” she replied bluntly.
“Wow. Wasn't expecting that. I thought things had gone well when you two talked it out.”
“Kim is stubborn. I could have talked to her for twelve hours straight, and s
he never would have listened to a word I said. She's blinded by love, but I don't think it's the lasting kind.”
I shifted uncomfortably. “What makes you say that?”
“She's young, Dominick. And she's never been in love with anyone before you.”
“What does that have to do with her love not being lasting?” I quirked an eyebrow.
“You know how it is. No one ever ends up with their first love in the end.”
Anger rolled through me, and I had to swallow it down. The only reason I hadn't ended up with my first love was because she didn't love me back. It didn't matter if the person was your first love or fifteenth. The placement in the line didn't determine how long you stayed with a person. This wasn't Tammy's real issue with us. She was just looked for excuses as to why we shouldn't be together, desperately grasping at straws.
“You're upset because I'm older than her, or because I loved you in the past, or because of some other thing. This crap you're saying now has nothing to do with it.” I furrowed my brows at her.
“I'm just telling you what I think.” She recoiled slightly, noticing my change of tone.
“Trust me, there's nothing you haven't thought of that I haven't thought myself. In truth, I've tried to break up with Kim before, not because I didn't love her, but because I had the same fears that you do. I'm older than her. That's obvious, but it doesn't matter. Kim doesn't want someone her own age. She likes the relationship we have, and so do I.
“You might also be thinking that I went after her because you turned me down. Let me tell you now that it's not true. When I invited Kim here, it was because I wanted to help her, to help both of you. I had no romantic interest in her, even after she arrived. It wasn't until she practically threw herself at me that I realized she wanted more, and then I started thinking about what I wanted.
“We didn't fall in love right away. At least, I didn't. I was wary about the relationship, not just because of the age difference, but because she is your sister. In the end though, I did fall in love, and that can't be helped. We love each other. There's nothing that can be done about it. And we're going to get married with or without your blessing.”
Chapter 15: Kim
My stomach felt like a pit of angry eels. Maybe that three-day-old tuna salad sandwich I had for lunch hadn't been the best idea. I thought that tuna salad held for longer than that. I usually put pickle juice in mine. Wasn't that supposed to preserve it for longer? Perhaps it was the eggs going bad. The eggs I used had been about to expire. Whatever the case, I was catching hell for eating that sandwich, and I wasn't sure how much longer it would be before it made a reappearance.
Thinking I should flush it out of me before power vomiting took over, I sneaked out of the classroom and headed to the bathroom. Even after offering my stomach contents to the porcelain Goddess, I didn't feel much better. Not to mention that wasn't the only end it was coming out of. Son of a bitch, I gave myself food poisoning. This was not going to get better anytime soon.
With a groan, I submitted defeat, scooping up my backpack and heading out to my car. Hopefully, I could make it home before another round of nausea or the squirts hit me. I was all caught up in my last class, so missing it wouldn't kill me.
My foot pushed the pedal to the metal as I tried to get home as quickly as possible. It was only a short distance from the college to the condo, but I didn't trust my body to last even five minutes without the tuna craps hitting me again.
When I pulled into the condo parking lot, I noticed that a red Mazda Miata was sitting outside along with a bunch of work trucks. It wasn't until I got close enough to see the stickers on the bumper that I realized it was Tammy's. My mind couldn't figure out why she would be visiting Dominick when she knew I wasn't there. Maybe she had planned to surprise me?
I made a mad dash to the front door, only to be stopped outside by the sound of raised voices within. Tammy was practically yelling at Dominick, telling him that we weren't right together. He growled back to her that it wasn't for her to decide. Oh, no, this was bad.
I shoved my key into the keyhole before figuring out that the door wasn't locked. Then I stepped inside, ignoring my churning bowels to throw myself between the man I loved and the woman who was my sister.
“Kim,” they both said at the same time, obviously shocked to see me.
“Stop fighting.” I furrowed my brows at them as if I was talking down to two children. They were both sitting on the edge of the loveseats, their bodies rigid.
“We're not fighting,” Dominick said, trying to look calm.
“I can't bless this marriage.” Tammy shook her head, emotionally frazzled.
“Why not?” I asked, my heart sinking, a new sickness taking over me.
“You two aren't right for each other. You're just too stupid and blind to see it,” she insisted.
“Tammy,” I sighed. “I told you already, you don't have to like it, you just have to accept it.”
“I can't accept it. No, I won't accept it,” she told me with a huff, standing, her arms wrapped protectively around herself. “I'm sorry, Kim, but if you're going to marry him, then I won't be at the wedding. It would be a waste of my time.” Tammy stomped past me.
I turned to watch her leave, and when the door shut behind her, all I could do was run to the bathroom with tears streaming down my face. Dominick followed, but I slammed the door before he could get in, locking it behind myself, and pulling my pants and underwear down to sit on the toilet and cry. How embarrassing and miserable. I was depressed and sick.
“Kim, are you alright?” Dominick asked on the other side of the door.
The horrid sound my body made in reply told him otherwise.
“I'm sick. I'll be out in a second,” I called back to him.
I sighed as I heard his footsteps walking towards the living room, and my stomach gurgled in approval. This was going to take awhile. The suffering of my body and mind collided as I stayed in the bathroom, sobbing and thinking and shitting. What a combination. Tammy had sounded pissed, and I couldn't help but wonder what all they had talked about before I arrived. She had been sneaky. This obviously was planned. Come over to speak to Dominick while I wasn't home and try to convince him not to marry me. I was sure that was what she had in mind. What a bitch. Could my sister really be so selfish and petty as to go behind my back? I truly couldn't understand why she hated the idea of our relationship. Her fears were understandable, but this was going too far.
Finally, my body settled and I was able to emerge from the bathroom with a shameful look on my face. You'd think that after living with Dominick for a year, it wouldn't bother us to be sick around each other. Maybe it was the circumstances that made me feel so bad about it.
“You guys fought,” I said stupidly as I rounded the corner with my arms wrapped around myself as if I was trying to keep the sickness at bay.
“You lied to me about her approving,” he replied, his voice tense.
“I didn't lie to you. I thought she had approved of it, or at least accepted it.”
“That doesn't appear to be the case.”
I sat down gingerly across from him, not wanting to be too close in case the bubbles in my stomach decided to turn to gas. What I left in the bathroom required large amounts of Febreze to cover up. The last thing I wanted to do was gas Dominick when he was already upset, not that he would have really cared. We farted around each other all the time. It was proof of our comfort together. Still, it didn't seem quite appropriate at the moment.
“What was she saying to you?” I asked.
“What wasn't she saying to me is a better question,” he sighed.
“Probably all the same things she said to me when I went over to her place.”
“Probably. It doesn't matter though. We're going to get married. That is, if you still want to marry me.” Dominick gave me a sad look, as if he half expected me to say no.
“Of course, I still want to marry you. We have a long engagement. A year. Tha
t should give her time to come around. She has to come around,” I sniffled.
“What if she doesn't?”
I shrugged. “She'll come around.”
Dominick pressed his lips together, not satisfied with my answer, but he didn't ask me any further questions. To my horror, he crossed the space between us and sat next to me, wrapping his arm around my shoulder to rub it affectionately.
“Sick,” I murmured.
“I don't care. Part of loving someone is taking care of them, and part of taking care of them is being close to them.”
I swooned slightly from his words, resting my head on his shoulder. He was right for me, whether Tammy liked it or not. No man would ever be better for me. I had to make her see that. I just had to.
Chapter 16
Tammy didn't give me a chance to make her see that Dominick and I should be together. I suppose it was both of our faults. She didn't call me, and I didn't call her. It was the first time that we put such distance between us, and it hurt more than I could have ever imagined.
Dominick was supportive, telling me that I should be the bigger person and call her, that the longer we didn't speak to each other, the easier it would be not to speak to each other. He said it would cause a void that would eventually be hard to repair. Despite his sage advice, I was stubborn. I wanted her to realize that she was wrong and come to me first. It didn't happen though.
Weeks passed, and the pain didn't get better. Sometimes, I'd forget about it, but it was always there. Would Tammy really write me out of her life just because I was marrying her childhood best friend? It seemed awfully stupid, but that was the reality of the situation.
Part of me thought I would eventually get over it, but thinking of having anyone other than my sister as my maid of honor made me sad. The only other friends I had were back home, except for Carmen, and I definitely didn't want her as my maid of honor. Without Tammy, I felt completely alone. There was no one to help me plan the wedding. No one to go dress shopping with. No one.