route, which will be changed or streets closed to traffic, depending on the anticipated support for the cause.
When all is agreed, you will receive your demonstration permit and the necessary preparations can be made for the day. During the demonstration, you will naturally notice increased police presence. Do not be dismayed. They are individuals first and policemen second. Some will even gladly display your campaign button on their uniform. If so requested, police car(s) will follow your demonstration along its defined route to ensure your cause is heard and not disrupted.
Non-approved demonstrations are not permitted, but are often allowed if they are orderly and do not disturb traffic—and depending on the appearance of the protesters and the general acceptance of the goal. Police support during the proceedings is limited.
It must be emphasized that many of the causes have the good of the nation, minorities, the oppressed or all of (wo) mankind in mind. Whatever the subject matter, they are an ongoing example of democracy in progress. What appears to be a Dutch addiction to this process strikes visitors to the country as rather curious. Perhaps these passionate demonstrations and debates account in part for the relatively low level of violence in an increasingly violent era.
Demonstrating and protesting first became popular and fashionable following World War II. Many 60+ers do not appreciate such activities. As one overseas correspondent writes,
This type of thing is not dignified and not in line with the traditional sobriety of the Dutch. It is more a recent phenomenon which may well disappear as time goes by. I personally hope so, as I would hate this trend to become a Dutch characteristic.
’The Dutch Way’
The most successful of Dutch causes are elevated to the rank of ‘The Dutch Way,’ which is an adulation bestowed upon those principles and prejudices that command the support of 250% of the population. In this respect, the housing rights issue of the 1970’s and 1980’s commands the prime example. Long-suffering parents were anxious for their post-pubic offspring to vacate the nest while the enfants terribles themselves could not wait to feather their own nests. But there are few empty homes.
A typically Dutch answer to this situation was to form pressure groups known to the outside world as krakers. The krakers, who enjoyed their heyday in the 1980’s, fanatically opposed the acquisition of empty buildings for speculation—all reasonable and uninhabited space should be translated into subsidized housing for them. This is ‘ The Dutch Way.’
Krakers invaded vacant places: office blocks, individual flats, shops, warehouses or any other construction that was vacant for more than a few days. The kraker-cause came to a head during violent riots in Amsterdam. The police were forced to call in the army which brought in a tank to move the crowd. The confrontation ended only when the city agreed to renovate the occupied building for the squatters. ‘We have the squatters under control now…’ A city housing official summed it up by stating that the job would cost more than a million guilders, ‘…an expensive way to deal with a little social unrest. But it’s The Dutch Way.’
The krakers have since dropped from the limelight, their particular cause appearing old-fashioned to the masses. A 1991 attempt to revive public support by invading a small island was met with little more than a sarcastic smirk by the general populace and a request from the Rijkswaterstaat to ‘kindly vacate the premises.’
No doubt partially due to the support and success of the krakers’ tactics in Amsterdam, RaRa (de Revolutionaire Anti Racistische Actie) exploded terrorist bombs at the Amsterdam home of the Secretary of State and at the Palace of Justice in The Hague in 1991. The cause in question was a series of governmental proposals on reforming political asylum and its abuse. Public reaction was one of outrage and horror, giving hope to all that this kind of senseless anti-Dutch activity will NOT become The NEW Dutch Way.
The House of Her
Women’s liberation is probably the most extreme example of the ‘National Passion’ that readily demonstrates (sorry, exemplifies) itself. And no wonder. The Dutch Government willingly provides 12-13 million guilders annually for feminists to do ‘research.’ The modern Dutch Vrouwen (women) are so fanatical about their genetic characteristics that they elevate femininity to the highest pinnacle possible. They are WOMEN—and people, humans, etc., secondly. Vrouwen have their own cafes, books, magazines, newspapers, theatres, travel agencies, unions and, of course, their own therapy centres. Through these media, Vrouwen can, and do, form many pressure groups which effect radical changes to society and its laws, on such subjects as birth control, abortion, divorce, homosexuality and equality-through-dominance.
Vrouwen-causes are a classic and typical obsession with which the modern Dutch identify. Any variety can trigger a chain reaction with the hope of achieving the ultimate goal of a Europe-wide demonstration against things that ordinary people would class as petty fads. As an indication of the severity of the infliction, the 1987 Amsterdam Telephone Directory listed no less than 27 entries under ‘Vrouwen’ alone. Amongst the more paranoid were:
Vrouwen Actiecomite van Vervroegd AOW-Pens.
(Women’s action committee for early old-age pensions)
De Vrouwenfietsenmakerij
(Women’s Bicycle Repairer)
Stichting Aktiekomitee Vrouwen in de Bijstand
(Women’s welfare action committee foundation)
Vrouwen klussenkollektief de Karweiven
(Women’s Odd-Jobs Collective—the ‘Female Odd-Jobs’)
Internationaal Archief v.d. Vrouwenbeweging
(International archives of women’s movements), which boasts of 45,000 volumes (mostly in Dutch) of gender-related information.
While gathering background material for this chapter, we attempted to contact 33 women’s organizations in order to ascertain their goals. Of the enquiries dispatched:
Twenty were never answered.
Three were returned, unopened.
Nine replied, enclosing details of their craft and promotional brochures, obligatory stickers, etc.
One replied by postcard, demanding to know, ‘…who you are, how you got our address, where you learned dutch and what you are going to do with the information…’
So much for the feminists’ desire to make their suffering known to the whole of man- and woman-kind. Typical of the mentality reflected in the replies we did receive:
‘…we are not against anything. We demand the right to live according to the custom of this country and not to be seen as half of a couple but as an individual person and be treated as such.’
The custom of the country being that man goes to work, WOMAN remains home with children and housework.
Despite suffragette-like campaigns, the greater cause of Dutch Vrouwen-freedom can only succeed if blessed with governmental cash. STEO (Stimulation Group for Liberation Research) asks HFL 6 million annually for ‘Vrouwen-studies,’ and Management Emacipatie (formed to improve the position of women in career instructions) asks for a budget of HFL 7.3 million.
Ironically, in their struggle for equality and dominance, many Dutch women emulate and incorporate the very masculine characteristics which they claim they despise. These characteristics have been vrouwened upon by concerned males for over three centuries:
…In their families they are all equals and you have noway to know the master and mistress but by taking them in bed together!
—Owen Feltham, London, 1652
…Most of the women there (Holland) have no taste, are most unfeminine, and walk like farmers!
—Hans Algra, South Africa, 1992
Finally on this topic, an extract from a pamphlet supplement issued by the Amsterdam Migrant’s Center is included here in its ORIGINAL, unabridged English language form:
…And a last example, in which the center did not play a role: Amsterdam house wives became alot more critical on the quality of the vegetables on market places having noticed how the Surinam, Turkishand Moroccan migrants make their choise. The daily supply
of previously unknown vegetables proves the influence of the new cuisines on Dutch cooking.
(Answers on a postcard, please, to…)
Military Service
Until 1995, Dutch military service was compulsory and limited to just over a one-year period for young males. Now it is strictly a volunteer affair. To some its hardship equals that of a stay in a holiday camp. The ranks are permitted to retain long hair, earrings and other symbols of their mid-childhood, and enjoy full labour benefits (controlled working hours, public holidays, etc.). Even the officers have a union contract. Gays are welcome and received at all entry levels, as an inquiry in the early 1970’s found homosexual exclusion to be discriminatory.
Back in the not-so-distant days of conscription, the alternative to military service was to become a conscientious objector, officially recognized and categorized. A dienst weigeraar (service ‘refuser’) performed civilian-type work, or a totaal weigeraar (complete ‘refuser’) lounged around in a military prison for about two years. Even after sentencing, a weigeraar could conscientiously object—and still have a chance of beating the system. One such totaal weigeraar was freed from captivity after 24 hours of hunger striking because the nature of his protest did not fall under the totaal weigeraar rules: HE WAS AGAINST MILITARY SERVICE, BUT WAS NOT AN ANTI-MILITARIST. Women were (and still are) accepted in the service on a volunteer basis only, and in this capacity were often ridiculed by the general public. Presumably, some were protesting for the right of compulsory service, or refusal; basically…
…to have the right to go to prison for not wanting to do something they are currently not required to do.
The subject of effectiveness of the Dutch armed services as a deterrent to potential enemies is an interesting one. One 1992 study indicated that about 30% of a military medical unit in Germany were registered drug users (the unit being known as the ‘Military Hash Home’). Hash, marijuana, cocaine and XTC were openly used throughout the military complex—not a good basis for defending one’s homeland.
Given that the purpose of a national army, navy and air force in western Europe is to maintain efficient, co-ordinated and fighting forces under the umbrella of NATO, only the Dutch could employ a Minister for Defence who strives to eliminate violence in the military and who is required to provide ‘relaxation advice’ counseling for the troops. Apparently there is too much boredom and idleness in the Dutch barracks.
Why do they need this military ‘deterrent’ anyway? In the words of Socialist Member of Parliament Klaas de Vries,
This is a self-regulatory society; it is not governed by speeches from above. We allow as many people as possible to be themselves. Some call that anarchy; we call it civilization.
The military deterrent
A spin-off advantage to involvement in NATO at least allows the Dutch image to be stressed abroad. The 1991 International Air Tattoo at RAF Fairford, England, featured a ‘Tiger Meet’ as its main theme. The theme was chosen to celebrate the 30th anniversary of the NATO Tiger Association. Holland was one of 16 countries that took part. Their F-16 ground crew carried the tiger theme from head to toe, with safari hats and yellow-and-black striped wooden shoes.
(For more on the Dutch image abroad, see Chapter 19.)
Chapter 12
RULES FOR SHOPPING
Holland is a cheap place to live, as the shops are always shut.
—John Q. Deacon, British Expatriot.
The Dutch love to window shop and to browse while dreaming of the ultimate bargain. Perhaps in fear of relenting to sales-pressure, many also suffer from the bizarre affliction known as drempelvrees (threshold phobia—fear of entering shops, restaurants, etc.). Having managed to cross the drempel, they revert to type. For your own protection, take heed of the following:
General
For smokers, before entering a shop, find a waste bin containing dry, combustible material in which to throw your burning cigarette.
When entering stores, let the door slam in the face of the person behind you. If you hear a loud thump or bang caused by a person in a cast, a pram or a wheelchair, nonchalantly turn around and mumble, ‘Surrey whore’ (see Chapter 16). If you’re in a particularly benevolent mood, you can further announce that you didn’t notice the person’s cast or wheelchair.
If someone gets in your way, place your hands on his/her shoulders and impatiently push the person aside as you show off your French, uttering, ‘Pardon.’
If your purchases amount to less than HFL 20-and a queue of more than three people is formed behind you, pay by cheque or credit card and take at least five minutes to search for your identification. Alternatively, delay the transaction, using whatever means possible until the queue has extended to eight people.
Hunt for bargains and complain about prices of ALL produce/merchandise (see Chapter 8).
In Supermarkets
Take a few one-guilder pieces as deposit for use of a trolley. Until 1988/89 the peel-off ring-tab from a beer or soft drink can was considered by much of the population to be legal tender for this purpose.
If a cloggy offers you an empty trolley in exchange for a guilder, beware! Either the mechanism for refunding your guilder is broken, or the wheels malfunction.
Conversely, if you are the one with an empty trolley, never abandon it. In pouring rain, gale, hail, sleet or snow, you must return it to collect your investment—one guilder. Failure to do so will immediately brand you as a dumb foreign tourist who has no idea of the real world. If you find you simply must abandon it, get out of the way as quickly as possible. You may be crushed in the rush to redeem it.
Frequently block aisles with trolley.
Recruit kids to covertly load other customers’ trolleys with expensive items.
At the check-out, the cashier must make two announcements: dag! and zegels? Dag means ‘good-day’ and zegels means ‘savings stamps.’ The latter is NOT a guttural Sieg Heil, as many Germans have learned to their cost.
Check egg cartons for quantity and condition of contents. At least one egg will usually be broken or missing. Mote also the ‘Dutch dozen’ (dozijn): ½dozijn—6, while 1 dozijn can be 10 or 12.
Prod and poke delicate items. When about to leave, complain to the shop assistant about the poor quality of the produce.
Place little faith in barcode scanners and the like at the check-out. Review your receipt for errors before leaving the supermarket. If you don’t, you may well come away unaware that the price reductions which attracted you in the first place were never applied.
Statiegeld and Borgsom
Statiegeld is the word applied to deposits on beverage containers. A beer bottle has a certain Statiegeld value; a full crate has the quantity value plus some extra for the plastic container.
In a well publicized incident, a Dutchman lifted a quantity of bottled refreshments from a shop. He immediately deposited them in the store’s recycling machine, thereby destroying the evidence of his crime and was duly rewarded for his environmental efforts in cash.
For discarding glassware with no value, there are recycling bins on street corners: one for coloured glass and one for clear glass. You may have to wait your turn to use these bins since it requires some studying before throwing bottles away. The owners want to make sure first that they don’t ruin themselves financially by inadvertently throwing away a bottle for which they paid Statiegeld.
At the time of writing, Statiegeld is in danger of becoming extinct. Shopkeepers find the whole process too time-consuming, space-consuming and expensive(!) and want the system eliminated. The irony here is that the scheme was originally introduced not so much as a recycling effort, but more as a marketing ploy to attract customers. With coins being ‘reimpursed,’ the idea was an immediate success with customers, and a typical supermarket now finds it has to sort recyclable containers into 70 different crates and 90 different pallets. Much to the retailers’ delight, studies are now underway to determine whether recyclable packaging or disposable packaging is better f
or the environment! Add to this the increasing black market in ‘statiegelded’ containers (some shopkeepers build expensive high fences to protect their stocks of used bottles) and the whole thing seems doomed. (For more on recycling, see Chapter 15.)
Borgsom is similar, but is applied to video camera rentals, safe keys, Bicycle rentals, etc. Anything that will make it, they’ll take it—and sometimes they’ll fight you tooth and nail not to reimburse it.
If you are not sure if you are paying borgsom on a transaction, a good indicator is when the vendor asks you for some legitimatie (see Chapter 10)—although it is unclear why a vendor needs proof of identity in order to borrow a few guilders from you.
We strongly doubt that borgsom will be threatened with commercial extinction in the foreseeable future.
Shopping for Clothes
When visiting fashion shops, take ear defenders with you to avoid permanent ear damage from the compulsory disco music blaring incessantly therein.
If you notice someone searching through a full rack of clothes, stand nearby and push the clothing apart so that you close the gap the person has made.
Take your children and encourage them to play hide-and-seek amongst garment rails.
At Street and Flea Markets
If you see an item you wish to buy, show minimal interest in it. Tell the vendor you saw the same thing for less than half the price at another stall in order to launch into a healthy bartering session.
If a crowd has gathered around a particular stall, push into the crowd, dig your elbows into those in front of you and breathe heavily in their ears to give them the hint to move out of your way. Conversely, if you are in the front row of a crowd studying the display of a stall and others try to elbow their way in, hold the fort. Do not leave until the crowd has dissipated.
When the market is extremely busy, walk against the flow of traffic, stopping frequently for no particular purpose.
1995 - The UnDutchables Page 7