Ignite (The Disciples Book 4)

by Cassandra Robbins

  Stepping out of the cold shower, I don’t bother to dry off. I grab my toothbrush and hear laughter coming from the bedroom. When I step out, she’s got her long legs propped up on my wall while she talks on her phone.

  “I know. I miss you too.” She sighs. “Bella, stop it. I can’t just pick up and go on tour with you and P!nk.” She laughs. “I’m happy here and I have a job.”

  I walk back to the bathroom and spit out the toothpaste.

  Fuck.

  Bella. This is the girlfriend she used to room with. The one whose shit I’ve stashed in a storage unit. I grip both sides of the sink. Antoinette is not going anywhere. I need to protect her and if that takes fifty years, so be it.

  Her happy squeals bring me back to the fact that she’s telling Bella the size of my cock and that she’s in love with me.

  I stop and listen, leaning against the doorframe. “He’s the most brilliant man to walk this earth. Talented, a musician… I know, I know… but he was in a band called the Dicks with Rhys Granger.”

  What am I doing? Spying on my girlfriend? I’m thirty-three years old. I’d call her my old lady, but that seems final. Also, I notice she hasn’t mentioned that I’m the VP of the Disciples.

  When I walk out, she sits up wearing my Dicks T-shirt and smiles at me. I open my dresser drawer and grab a black T-shirt. As she walks into the other room, I pull on some black jeans.

  “Bella, I have to go. I’ll call you soon.” She laughs again, sounding happy. “I’m not changing my mind. Be good, you.”

  I grab my cut from the side of my chair and put it on. I’m a dick. She’s twenty. Who the fuck am I to stand in her way?

  “Anything you want to tell me?” I say as I light a cigarette.

  “That was my best friend, Bella. I’ve been meaning to call her, and since yesterday was my birthday, I knew she’d be worried.” She bites her bottom lip as if she’s unsure if that’ll upset me.

  “She wants you to go on tour with P!nk?” I inhale and she looks at her feet then up at me.

  “A dancer got pregnant, so there’s an opening. But I told her no.” Her violet eyes look at me as if this should please me. Unfortunately, all it does is make me feel like a selfish prick.

  I nod then tell her the truth. “You should call her back and say yes. I don’t do relationships. It’s only a matter of time before the sex becomes old. You’re twenty, babe. At twenty, I was traveling the world, doing ex—”

  “Stop it!” she says, her face turning pale. “Don’t do that. Don’t tell me what I should do.” Her nose goes in the air and again my heart hurts. Keeping her with me when she needs to shine is selfish. I’m an asshole. It’s only a matter of time before I do tire of her.

  Thinking about playing house with someone is fucking stupid. The club is my family, not a woman.

  “I’m being honest. This is an opportunity for you. You should take it.”

  “Why are you doing this?” Tears well in those eyes that were alive with happiness minutes ago. She was excited talking to her friend about having fallen in love. Too bad she fell for me, a Disciple.

  “Because it’s the right thing. I’m never gonna be monogamous, Antoinette.” She looks as though I slapped her, but it’s true. “It’s not who I am. Sooner or later, I’ll see some cunt that I want to fuck and I will.”

  The tears swimming in her eyes spill, but she holds her head high, looking me straight in the eyes.

  “Well, you haven’t yet,” she challenges.

  She’s right. I haven’t. Not even been tempted. Why would I? I have my perfect woman right here, waiting for me.

  “I love you.”

  I shake my head. “You don’t even know what love is.” Picking up my Glock, I tuck it into the back of my jeans.

  “No. That’s where you’re wrong. I do know what love is, and it wouldn’t matter if I was twenty or thirty-three.” She sneers the thirty-three. “I love you, and not even you can take that from me.”

  I snort. “Give yourself time, baby. You’ll be amazed at how fast you can hate me.” Grabbing my keys, I leave her, not wanting any of this. It’s not what I do.

  I text Rip that I’m on my way and head downstairs. He’s probably already at the dispensary. That particular store is one of our most popular ones and Jade, our manager, is pissed that she’s been sitting on over $200,000 in cash in the safe. I should have gotten it yesterday, but with the Benny shit, I didn’t get to it.

  Kicking open the screen door, I don’t bother with coffee. Quite frankly, I can’t handle seeing Amy’s wise eyes. She’ll know instantly and I don’t want any questions.

  “Axel.” I almost groan—it’s Ryder and he can be worse than Amy. He’s talking with some prospects.

  “I’m late,” I grumble.

  “Two minutes.” He nods at the prospects and walks over as I get on my bike, trying not to punch my best friend.

  I hold up my hand. “Look. I’m not in the mood, so if you say you had a dream…”

  “Nah. I had that dream a month ago.”

  I snort in disgust and look down at my phone, hoping Ryder takes the hint. He doesn’t. I grind my teeth as I scan the numerous messages from Derrick. I’ll call him when I get to the dispensary. First I need to get away from Ryder’s judging eyes. I take a breath and pocket the phone, then look at him. “What’s up?”

  “Just making sure Antoinette is here today.” His brown eyes bore into me as if he knows I’m in way over my head.

  “Yeah, man. I need to get the cash out of the dispensary. Then I’ll be back.”

  Ryder lights up a cigarette and his phone rings. I start my bike because I’m not waiting. How has my life exploded in a matter of hours? Thirty-three years of me being happy and content out the fucking window. My heart hurts, I’m angry, and I’m off my game, distracted by a pair of violet eyes.

  I should feel better. Instead I’m flying on adrenaline.

  I’m a liar.

  I broke my own rule.

  Never get attached.

  Well, that went to shit. I’d say I’m attached and then some. More like obsessed.

  Visions of her platinum hair wrapped around my tan hand, red lips, and that beauty mark I knew was gonna be my downfall run through my head.

  The ride to the dispensary takes longer than usual with the fucking construction on Magnolia Boulevard, even with me zigzagging, daring someone to hit me. When I’m buzzed in to the dispensary at last, Jade and Rip sit at the counter laughing, waiting for me.

  My dick vibrates with a text that I know will rip me apart.

  Ryder: Antoinette just pulled up to the diner with Cindy. You said she was staying in your room.

  My eyes blink at the phone. This is impossible. I can’t be reading this right. And then I fucking lose it and throw the phone against the wall. Jade screams and Rip looks up holding his hands out like that’s gonna calm me.

  “Call Ryder,” I snarl. “Now.”

  He pulls out his phone. “What’s happened?” he says, then gives me his phone.

  “How the fuck did this happen? Where are you?” I yell, already out the door and heading to my bike. A man jogging by stops to look at me and runs faster.

  “Watch it, Axel,” he says. “Shit is going down. I’m watching Charlie at the diner. The cops and fire department are at the Pussycat. Someone started a dumpster fire in the alley. Blade and David are having to deal with that mess.”

  Cold dread slithers up my spine. It’s always like this when something bad is about to happen. Like ice water has been injected into my veins, I try to breathe.

  “Ryder, don’t take your eyes off her. I’m on my way.” I hang up, beyond trying to be reasonable.

  This is it. Benny dies today.

  ANTOINETTE

  “Thanks for taking me. I know you have plans today.” I wipe my tears away roughly as I slip on some black Ray Bans I stole from Axel’s dresser.

  Cindy looks over at me. “No problem. It’s perfect. I’m meeting a guy for co
ffee down the street. Because that’s what you do these days. No lunch or dinner until you have coffee and make sure they look like their picture.” Her voice sounds happy, yet I suspect Cindy does a lot of crying in private. She’s way more sensitive than she lets on.

  “When does life get easier?” I lean my head back and look out the window as we pass the stores and cute restaurants on Ventura Boulevard.

  “I have ten years on you and I’m still waiting.” She reaches over, grabs my hand, and squeezes.

  “At least he was honest,” I say out loud, forgetting that Cindy is not inside my head. But she must get it because she nods and turns down her crappy music.

  “Look, he does have a point. And you know I hate to agree with him. You’re young and talented. What are you gonna do? Be a waitress and hope Axel doesn’t tire of you?”

  I look at her, and when she says it like that it sounds right and just. But it’s not.

  “Why not? Is it so terrible that I want to stay and maybe start teaching some dance classes?”

  We pull into the deserted parking and she turns toward me. “No, as long as you’re doing it for you, not for Axel.”

  “I love him,” I croak and grab my bag, preparing to get out. “It has everything to do with him. If I give up on Axel, I give up on me.”

  She nods and looks around the empty parking lot. “I’ll pick you up when you’re done.” She’s trying to sound happy, but her eyes fill with tears. “Great. Now I’m getting ready to cry.” She looks up at the top of her car.

  “Sorry.” I get out. I can’t say more. Otherwise, I’m gonna lose it and ruin what’s left of Cindy’s coffee date. After stepping up on the curb, I hold open the diner’s door as a couple walks out.

  Charlie looks up from the register. “Antoinette.” She glances around as if we’re being watched. “What are you doing here?”

  “Oh God, Charlie. I don’t even know. I guess I needed to get out of the compound, and I thought you might need help.”

  She takes a deep breath. “I’m closing early again,” she mumbles and smiles at what looks like the last table of four. They hand her their check. Smiling, she rings them up. “Thank you.”

  I watch the customers leave, swinging back to her worried face. “What’s going on?” I hiss, planting the sunglasses on top of my head.

  “What did Axel tell you?” she whispers and pulls me toward the speakers.

  “Just that creepy guy might be Eve’s brother.” I take a deep breath and exhale, suddenly feeling sick. I shouldn’t have left. I’m not helping. If anything, I’m upsetting Charlie.

  “Exactly. David is freaking out. Like I haven’t seen him like this in years.” Her nails dig into my arm, but I stay quiet and try to be supportive.

  “I sent Victor and Carl home already.” She tries to smile, but it’s tight.

  “Okay. I’ll put the closed sign on.” I shiver. This is bad. But for fuck’s sake, David’s not gonna let anything happen to Charlie, so maybe I’m being paranoid.

  “Have you talked to Ev—” She puts her finger to her mouth. And now I start looking around.

  “So, since it’s slow, I’m closing early.” We start to walk together to the back. Charlie has a bag of money and credit card slips to put in her safe. As we step around the corner, I see movement. It happens so fast that all I can do is gasp; then cold sweaty hands cover my mouth and pull me in tight as his breath makes me want to retch.

  “Hello, my little ballerina. Who’s your friend?” His hands are filthy and I instantly taste salty, bitter sweat and God only knows what. He partially covers my nose and every time I inhale, the taste gets stronger.

  Holy fuck.

  Benny. He’s here and Charlie and I are alone. My pulse is racing so fast I can’t think, can’t breathe. This is my fault. He wants me. He came for me. This is why Axel said to stay home. What was I thinking? Split seconds that feel like minutes pass as I try to think and calm my rapid breathing.

  Charlie stands frozen. Her eyes go wide as I feel the sharp edge of a cool knife at my throat.

  “Just relax.” She holds up her hands as I hear a slight wheezing coming from his breath.

  “I’m Charlie. I know your sister. Why don’t we just relax,” she repeats.

  He pulls me tight against him and I can feel the erection through his pants. Filled with anger, I close my eyes at the sting of tears. I’m not doing this. My mom was a victim, not me.

  He slowly moves us backward. My feet are numb, but maybe I’m in shock because I’m trying to figure out what to do when I get away from him. I can easily jerk away, but what if he lunges and stabs me?

  “Ah, my sister.” He keeps moving us back toward the kitchen. I’ll make my move at the back door. That’s probably the best place.

  “Look. I’m assuming you don’t want me to slice your friend, correct? I don’t want to kill her, but I will if you try to be a hero.”

  I start to gag, and he continues talking to Charlie. “Here’s how this is gonna work.” He must notice my heaving and applies more pressure on my neck, which makes me panic.

  “Charlie, when I ask you to open the door, you will and then you can go home to your family. Okay?” Her golden eyes look from mine to his. It’s amazing how calm she stays, her eyes alert but focused.

  “Tell your friend to stop struggling. It’s pointless.” He shakes me.

  Charlie looks at me then. “You can’t possibly think you’ll get away with this, do you? I don’t often say this, but she’s the woman of a Disciple. They’ll kill you.”

  It’s almost as if I’ve stopped breathing. That was not a threat—it was fact. And even though he may not love me, Axel does want me. I relax slightly. That’s why she’s not freaking out. She knows they’ll come.

  “Not if I kill her first,” he snarls. This does make her eye twitch, but otherwise her face does not change.

  “You don’t live as long as I have by not being smart,” he states.

  My heart drops. He’s insane and insane people can cause a lot of damage. I wonder if this is how my mom felt before my dad put the gun in her mouth. If she begged or didn’t even know. I like to think she didn’t know. That he simply walked up to her while she was getting my tutu ready for my performance and shot her in the head. Fast and painless.

  But in reality she was standing. So, she had to know, meaning that in her last minutes, she was scared. That’s what gives me nightmares.

  “Toni. I love you. You are my mate. I’ll put my seed inside you once I’ve sucked his out,” he whispers in my ear. It’s at this moment that the terror, along with the fact that I can’t die like this, kicks in. I swallow. The knife has started to feel warm and slick. Am I sweating?

  “You tell my sister I have no hard feelings. But this is it. I’ll be disappearing.” I don’t know if he’s talking to Charlie or both of us, but whatever he thinks he’s going to do to me, I’ll die first. My mom didn’t have a chance to fight. She needed to leave years before, but I’m not her.

  “I will,” Charlie says. “Anything else?”

  He freezes, maybe he wasn’t expecting Charlie’s blasé attitude, but he tightens his grip on me and starts to drag us to the backdoor.

  He turns to her. “I don’t like you. You stay!” he yells. “Stay! You stay.”

  A cool air alerts me that it’s time to move. That and I know he’s here.

  “Benny.”

  That deep, melodic voice I love vibrates through me, and I take that moment to make my move. I don’t have five-inch-high heels on this time, but I do have the element of surprise and fifteen years of core training. I take my heel and kick back on his shin. He grunts, but it’s the sound of bones cracking that allows me to be free. I turn to see Axel is on the move, breaking his left arm. The knife clatters and spins on the floor as Axel takes over the room the way a king claims a land.

  His sapphire eyes are like lasers. Danger radiates from him, leaving me breathless, and I wonder if I’m going crazy—all I want right no
w is to get on my knees and worship his cock.

  He reaches for me and gently pulls me behind him. My brain is ticking like a clock’s second hand as everything seems to happen in slow motion.

  I feel rather than see Charlie’s arms grab ahold of mine and Ryder escorting us both toward the door. Extending my arm, I try to reach for Axel.

  As we pass, I see Benny. He’s in the corner, squeezing himself like a rat in between the dishwashing station.

  “Lock the doors after them,” Axel says, removing his cut and shirt.

  “You’re gonna die today.” He walks toward Benny and the hair on the back of my neck stands up.

  Axel is going to kill him.

  “Did you honestly think you could take what’s mine?” He stands, towering over a crouched Benny.

  Power.

  “Axel?” My voice sounds far away. He turns and our eyes lock for what I want to be eternity, though it ends in an instant. But in a flash, he gives me everything. I see him for exactly what he is.

  And I want him.

  Axel’s mine.

  I want everything about this man who stands like a beautiful, fierce god about to unleash all his fury.

  “Go.” He nods at Ryder who pulls me out into the bright sunlight.

  The warm air hits my face and I jump as the kitchen door slams with a loud thud. And I’m alone. Ryder has left me to go back in and Charlie screams and runs into David’s arms.

  David holds her tight to his chest, murmuring words of love. God, what’s happening? Should I walk away? The way they are together, it’s as if it’s only them and I’m some annoying bee or fly on the wall invading their privacy.

  I look around and there are a lot of bikes in the parking lot. Blade is busy talking with Edge. They look over at me, and I swallow, wanting to hide, but there’s nowhere to go. I’m surrounded by the black vests of Disciples and the smell of garbage coming from the dumpster next to me.