Secrets Shared

by Raven McAllan

  Shit.

  “Do Jeff and Kath know?”

  Jess shook her head. “Not as far as I know, but I suspect that they have an idea that something happened to make me feel the way I do. So, no one does except me and the asshat who created them. Hell, it was my own fucking fault for being naïve and trusting. What a simpleton I was. Never again. No one is ever going to have that sort of power over me. I’m my own person now, and no one, but no one’s going to change that.”

  No wonder he’d sensed something very wrong. David itched to find out who had done what to her, and make him—he assumed it was a him—pay. Even without details, David realized it had to be bad. If she couldn’t stand to be blindfolded, held tight or, he guessed, be bound in any way, he’d gotten a job and a half ahead of him. Something in her called to him. He wanted her, and it was a long while since he’d felt such an immediate and urgent pull to anyone. Whether it would happen, he had no idea. Whether she’d be able to submit to him, he had his doubts. Nevertheless, he had to try and see where the attraction led.

  “Jess, that you are your own person has never been in doubt, I promise. But you’re sat in my lap and my cock is practically opening my zipper without any help from me, I’m so aroused. You keep giving these little shows that make me think you’d like to see what we might have.” He held his breath. There had been tells, very slight but there. Maybe not as many as he intimated, but there nevertheless.

  She shifted uneasily on his lap. His dick responded with Pavlovian fervor, and David wished he could unzip his jeans and ease the pressure on it. Odds on it would be a cold shower or self help later.

  “Maybe, but just cos they’re there doesn’t mean I have to act on them.”

  “True,” he agreed. “But surely the way to slay the dragons and move on, and not to let them bother you is to show they don’t have the power to hurt you anymore?”

  “Ha, go you. Nope, not in my world it’s not.” She sighed. “Look, David, maybe this is one time we need to agree to disagree? And let me beg you not to tell Jeff or Kath about me falling to bits. Please?”

  She looked up at him, a plea in her eyes. Her cheeks still held the evidence of her tears, her eyelids were puffy and her skin had gone to that horrible pasty white shade again. Even like that, with her hair in rat’s tails where she’d ran her hands through it, David deemed she was beautiful. He traced the outline of her spine with the tip of his index finger. Her eyes narrowed, but she didn’t say anything.

  “I’ll do you a deal. I won’t say anything to Jeff or Kath, if you tell me everything. Including about your secret staircase. I’ve lived here for the best part of a year now, and I’ve seen no hint of one.”

  “Hmm.” Jess not only nibbled her lip, she put her finger into her mouth and gnawed at her nail. He pulled it out.

  “Don’t do that. You’ll regret it later. So, do we have a deal?”

  “Help me stand up, please.”

  David put his hands under her butt and resisted the urge to fondle her cheeks as he gave her the leverage she needed. “There you go.”

  “Thanks.” She began to pace the room. David found himself counting her steps. Five one way and six the other. A swift three strides past the fireplace and back to stand in front of him. “So I tell you and that’s it? You keep the information to yourself, and we go our separate ways? End of?”

  “I’ll promise not to say anything to anyone without your permission. But I give you fair warning, I’ll do my damnedest to make you stay. I think we deserve to explore what could be between us.” He kept his glance fixed on her face. “I think we’d be perfect.” The slight dip of her head, the way she looked at the floor and fluttered her hands toward his lap and away again thrilled him. It shrieked submissive. He could almost hear the arguments she was having with herself as she stood there and clenched her hands. Jess looked at him full on. Emotions chased each other across her face, and sent shivers of worry vying with tinges of awareness racing through him, until at last she sighed.

  “Okay then. I guess I’m going to have to say something to explain my freak-fest on the way here. And in the interest of my brother not being arrested for murder, I guess you’ll do. But I go once it’s off my chest.”

  It wasn’t the most complimentary way a gesture of help had been accepted, but at least it was a yes.

  “Don’t forget the passage,” he reminded her. That thought intrigued him.

  “Oh, I won’t. Right then, do we sit here?” she pointed to the settee.

  “We can do. Or at the table, in the chairs or on the bed.”

  Chapter Seven

  Did he actually say that? Jess squashed the notion that curling up against David on the bed might be nice. She didn’t want to get too cozy. As much as she trusted him to keep his word regarding Jeff, she knew he’d also keep his word about trying to persuade her to explore their feelings. And that scared the crap out of her.

  “At the table maybe. With coffee?” Little stings of regret skittered through her. If only she could be brave, take what was offered and discover what, or who, she was. Jess was uneasily aware why she wouldn’t. She might not like what she discovered.

  “Damn, I forgot to offer you something to drink.” David hit his forehead with his palm. “Some Dom I am.”

  Jess started at his action, did people really do things like that? Smack their heads in such an over the top, dramatic manner? It seemed so.

  “I didn’t give you much chance, did I?” she pointed out the obvious. “And water will be fine, I’m just wrung out.” That’s an understatement if anything is. Wrung out and drip-dried.

  “I have a perfect Chenin, but somehow I don’t think it’s the right time for that.” David walked across the room to where a gray painted door led to what Jess remembered as an overlarge cupboard with a tiny window in it. “What was this when you lived here?” He opened the door. “It’s my kitchen now. The bedroom is through the other door.”

  Jess glanced to the other door he’d mentioned and looked away again. She remembered two rooms through there and had a scary feeling what the second of those rooms could be used for. Or would he not have a playroom when he had a whole club to play in? She realized David was waiting for her to answer.

  “Oh, er, it was a junk cupboard. I kept things like my hockey sticks and skipping ropes in there. And at one point I had Ferdy hidden. My cat,” Jess explained as she saw the look of query on his face. “He was an abandoned kitten, and mum had said no more pets. We’d gotten two dogs and three ferrets as it was. To say nothing of a pet lamb.”

  David laughed and disappeared through the doorway. “And how long did you keep Ferdy hidden?”

  Jess wandered to the fireplace and ran her hand under the mantle. The tiny protrusion was still there to one side of an ornate stone carved rose. I wonder why Jeff didn’t mention it? Maybe because we both swore never to? And I still have the scar to prove it? They’d pricked their thumbs and swapped blood, but Jeff had been a bit too enthusiastic when he’d helped Jess, and the result was a tiny scar.

  “Jess?”

  She realized she hadn’t answered David’s question.

  “Oh, fifteen hours or so. Not all of them hidden in my cupboard you understand. That was about seven hours until mum heard the squeaks and investigated. Ferdy looked up at her and meowed, and mum was hooked.” She curled her fingers over the rose and felt the nick in the stone. It seemed all was well secret passage wise.

  Next door she could hear David moving about. With a guilty stealth that didn’t sit well with her, Jess moved away from the fireplace and sat at a hard-backed chair next to the table. At least the seat was soft. She’d only just gotten settled when David reappeared carrying a tray with a cafetiere, a jug of what she assumed was milk and two mugs on it.

  “Do you take sugar? I’ll have to run down for some, I haven’t got any.” She must have looked as blank as she felt. “To the kitchen. In the club. They do non-alcoholic beverages and light meals. If you want sugar, I’ll need t
o get some.”

  “Oh no. I take my coffee black, thanks. I’m a cheap date.” Argh, foot in mouth. When will I learn?

  “I’ll have to remember that.” David poured two cups of coffee and sat next to her. He fished in his pocket and brought out a couple of wrapped oat bars. “Here, sorry, but as before, the cupboards are almost bare. I need to go shopping. I don’t seem to have time to eat up here very often. Though if I had a companion, I reckon that would change.”

  “Yes, well, thank you. Your Billy-no-mates status is not really anything to do with me.” Jess cringed at the arsy tone. There was no need for it.

  He raised one eyebrow. “You think not? Okay, I won’t say in your own time. Start talking.”

  Jess swallowed a mouthful of coffee and stalled as she unwrapped her oat bar. The look on his face stopped her going as far as taking a bite. She put the cup and the biscuit on the table, settled her elbows next to them and rested her chin on her hands. Across from her, David sat with his chair tilted back on two legs. His hands cradled his coffee cup and he smiled.

  “You know, honey, there’s nothing you can say that will shock me. I’ve heard it all.”

  She doubted it. “Are you sitting comfortably then? I need to go back in time. And I feel sick.” Her stomach churned, and bile coated her throat. Jess swallowed several times to try and get rid of it. It was more than nasty. She looked at her cup of coffee and away again. Yuk no, not coffee. The mention of coffee increased her nausea. To her relief, David didn’t offer platitudes. He walked out of the room and came back with a bottle of mineral water and a glass, which he put down on the table next to her.

  “Thanks,” Jess poured a glass and drank half down. “So I need to go back to my last year at school. No we didn’t wear uniforms, and I didn’t have pigtails.” She did her best to lighten the tone. It was going to get dark, dangerous and depressing soon enough.

  “Pity.”

  Bless him. David was trying to match her upbeat mood.

  He leered and grinned. “I fancy seeing you in a gymslip and pigtails.”

  “I was a brat.”

  “Oh, even better. How did you say that teacher used the double ruler?” he mimed a double tap on his hand. “My mind is in overdrive.”

  “Good for your mind. I don’t need a reminder, or a repeat. It hurt, and no, not in a good way. She was a sadist. Sadism is so not my style.”

  “Nor mine,” David said mildly. “Any pain I inflict is for pleasure. It’ll be for both our pleasure when I spank or flog you.” He looked at Jess and winked. Even though he didn’t move, his body language changed. How can he do that? His eyes darkened, and somehow his expression was one of interest and speculation. Or domination? She shuddered. The only domination she wanted was winning at cards. Liar, liar, pants on fire.

  “In your dreams.”

  He grinned. “Oh, yes. Okay, go on then, you’re what eighteen?”

  Jess nodded. “And naïve. Oh the odd lad had tried it on. But seriously, twiddling my boobs like locking and unlocking a door, or fixing a table is so not a turn on. Nor is trying to find my clit and missing. I mean it might not be the size of a cock, but surely a guy must have a rough idea of the female anatomy? Enough to know it’s in the front not attached to the rear. So it was one big yawn-fest, and something to giggle about in the loos at school. Until one day, my best friend and I had a sleepover. We shared a bed like we always had. Only this one time it was different. I don’t know who did what when, but I can hold my hand up and say we both knew where to find each other’s clit.” She let her mind drift back to those days of discovery.

  “Kath?”

  Jess had forgotten about David. She jumped and water spilled over her top. “Damn. Ugh, that’s wet.” She flapped her vest away from her skin. In Jess’ mind there wasn’t much worse than wet silk clinging to your body. She blocked her mind to how David’s shirt might look plastered to him. That’s different.

  “Take it off.” It was a suggestion—just.

  “Pardon?” Jess had heard him correctly, but she wasn’t going to meekly do as David demanded. As much as she’d like to de-clammy herself, she wasn’t going topless for anyone.

  “Go into the bathroom and take that wet top off. The bathroom is off my bedroom. Hell, woman I’ll find you something to put on. Heaven help if I see your boobs. I might not be able to control myself, and tie you up and force myself on you.”

  “Not if you value your chances of replicating a row of little Davids at some time.” She hesitated and bit her lip. His eyes narrowed. Just that one small change in expression and her skin felt too tight for her body and her scalp tingled. Fuck, when will I be able to control my reactions? “Sorry, I forgot. So let that one go eh? Pretend you never saw it?” Jess said in a hurry, and hoped her frivolity would put him off her reaction. Even in the short time she’d known him she should have known better. Shite, what have I said now?

  “Who did that?”

  She almost snarked back at him—“Who did what?”—but the look on his face made Jess change her mind. “That comes in the next bit,” she said quietly. “And yes, please, I will have something dry to put on.”

  “Through there, bathroom is off it. I’ll get a shirt and leave it on the bed.”

  Jess half smiled. “Thank you.” She walked quickly out of the room and through the bedroom to the bathroom. Once inside she leaned against the door and took a deep breath, before she looked around. If she hadn’t judged that one snigger might turn into hysteria, and David would burst in to find out what was wrong, she’d have laughed out loud. What had always seemed a sinister, dark, gloomy room built into the turret was now a bright, airy and quirky bathroom. No spiders, no squeaky floorboards and no strange noises coming from goodness knows where. All her childhood fears disappeared. Now if only her later ones could be disposed with as easily.

  Jess wriggled out of her top and hung it over the rail. She dried herself with a towel, which was twice as thick as anything she’d gotten at home, and rolled her bra in it to soak up as much moisture as possible. There was no way she was going to go braless with his all-seeing eyes on her. Even the thought of the way he looked at her was enough to perk up her nipples. Damp or not, the bra was going back on straight away. As it was mainly lace it would dry quickly, especially with the beautiful cloth. Jess prided herself on little luxuries like that, but this surpassed everything. Don’t get too used to it. It’s borrowed for two minutes, that’s all. She struggled back into her bra and grimaced at the feel of the lacy material against her skin.

  The knock on the door made her wrap the towel around herself. Jess cursed under her breath. She had to stop being so stupid.

  “Shirt on the bed. I’m going back to the lounge.” David spoke through the door and didn’t as much turn the handle. Jess wasn’t sure to be annoyed or pleased. Not only did he leave her be, he didn’t give her time to answer, before she heard what she assumed was the door to the lounge closing. Jess hurried into the bedroom, and picked up the sea green silk shirt thrown on the bed. Evidently David was a fan of silk. She held it to her cheek and sniffed the material. When she realized what she was doing, Jess rolled her eyes.

  Why am I trying to see if his scent is on it? More to the point, why are my knickers damp? I didn’t drop any water there.

  Chapter Eight

  David twisted his chair sideways in to the table and drank his coffee. It was lukewarm, but he couldn’t be bothered to either heat it up or make a fresh pot. His phone bleeped to tell him there was an incoming text. With a sigh, he pulled it out of his pocket. As he’d expected, it was from Jeff. Succinct and to the point.

  Is everything okay? Do you need me to take your class?

  There was only one answer he could give, even if it did stretch the truth somewhat.

  Yes, and yes.

  Now he could concentrate on Jess.

  He sensed her approach before he saw her. David looked up and the smile he’d begun froze. His shirt clung to her still damp skin.
The sleeves hung down over her hands and only her pink-tipped nails showed beneath them. The hem reached to the top of her legs, and made him wish she’d ditched her jeans. She’d left the top few buttons open, and the neckline arrowed toward her breasts, which were outlined in loving detail. Her nipples stroked the silk and stood out proudly. One side slipped off her shoulder, and a delicate lace bra strap showed. David clenched his fingers and dug his nails into his palm to stop himself reaching out to touch. The lace beckoned and begged to be lifted from her skin to reveal the secrets underneath. Soon.

  “Ah, I left my top on the rail.” Her voice was soft, almost hesitant. “Um, can you help me roll these sleeves up?”

  “Yeah, come here.”

  Jess walked toward him and stood a foot or so away. David grabbed her wrists and pulled her to stand between his legs, to then anchor her with his knees. Her eyes widened, and the pulse in her neck beat a rapid tattoo, but she didn’t pull away.

  “Don’t look at me like that. I’m one of the good guys.” He’d never felt so helpless in his life. How could he fight the boogeyman when he didn’t know what he was fighting? “You know they do say a trouble shared is a trouble halved, don’t you?” David ran his palms under the shirtsleeves. Jess shivered, and her lips parted. Her breath hissed as he trailed his fingers slowly back to her wrists, and her head fell forward.

  And she says she’s not interested? Who’s she trying to kid? David chose not to comment on her stance and rolled the cuffs back on the shirt until the sleeves gathered around Jess’s elbows.

  “There, now if only that was all you were wearing, I’d be the most uncomfortable man in the country. As it is?” He laughed softly. His cock had been hard since Jess had walked back into the room, and even before it hadn’t been what he would call uninterested. “Look for yourself, even better—feel free to feel.” Was that going too far too fast?