Oh, thank fuck.
I begin to move inside of her deeper at a snail’s pace, still worried of ruining this for her. I hit the barrier and pause looking down into Kennedy’s eyes that are wide with uneasiness from the pain she has to be feeling.
“It’s going to hurt, babe, but I promise after the initial pain that it will dull out.” Kennedy’s eyes shut as I push through to the good part. I stop all movement allowing her to get use to me being inside her. I’d be lying if I wasn’t seconds away from blowing my load prematurely.
“Open your eyes, Ken,” I whisper brushing a few stray hairs out of her eyes. “I need to see you.” Her eyes open slowly paired with a breathtaking smile.
Kennedy places her hand on the side of my face softly. “I’m okay, but I need you to move, Graham,” she grins giving me a boost of confidence that she’s fully enjoying this.
“I think I can do that,” I smirk knowing exactly what she needs.
Before Kennedy, before she came into my life sex was just that, sex. It was a consensual act between two people who didn’t expect anything after the fact. Having Kennedy trust me with this only solidifies how much she means to me. She has become the biggest part of my life quicker than I could have ever imagined. I always believed eventually I would fall in love and get married and all that other sappy shit people are constantly searching for. I didn’t think it would happen for me until well into my thirties or later. Now looking down at Kennedy I realize that I’ve found it. I found her.
You lucky, son of a bitch.
I rub my thumb along Kennedy’s cheek. “You’re beautiful. You know that right?”
“Oh my god…” she keeps her eyes locked on me. Starting to move her body along with mine allowing herself to let go and relax alongside me. Kennedy trusts me enough to take something that I know I’m not worthy of. I’m not worthy of the way she looks at me. I’m not being unrealistic about that. I understand that she deserves someone far better than me.
I could feel her teetering on the edge when she digs her nails into my back when I begin moving in and out at a more rapid speed as she holds on for dear life. “Just let go Kennedy,” I whisper in her ear. I deliberately kiss her on that sweet spot behind her earlobe knowing it will throw her body into frenzy. As if on cue I feel her clench and pulse around me causing my own release.
I don’t move from above her. The thought of being apart from her only causes an ache in my chest. Knowing she has just shared the most intimate thing with me causes a wave emotion to crash over me. I watch her strikingly blue eyes devour me with a simple look. I’m done in for and Kennedy is the sole reason for my undoing.
“Kennedy, last night…” I allow the thought to trail off.
She plays with the tufts of my hair waiting for me to continue. I’m not sure how to say it without confusing her. I don’t want her to think that the only reason why I’m saying anything is because of what we just shared. Kennedy must notice my apprehension.
“You can tell me anything, Graham,” she says with such conviction making me believe that she’s right.
“I don’t know how to say it,” I explain.
“Try from the beginning.”
I pull out of Kennedy knowing that this is a conversation that will be better off not being buried deep in her. Propping myself up on my elbow to peer down at her flushed cheeks knowing that I’m the reason behind her crimson coloring is exhilarating. I’m just going to have to say it, just blurt it out.
“The night that I hit you is the scariest moment of my life, Ken. I thought I had killed you and knowing what I know now I wouldn’t want to live in a world where you don’t exist,” I pause to take a breath. Nerves are multiplying. I’m never nervous. I can feel a lump forming in my throat. “Then I screwed it all up and I can’t make excuses for my behavior. I was scared. I’m still scared about this. This thing that is happening between to us so quickly and then last night happened and when I saw you lying on his bed I felt like someone had ripped my heart out because you being in pain at all physically makes me ill, Kennedy. I’d never purposefully hurt you and I know my word doesn’t mean much right now, but I promise you that I’ll do anything to fix what I did.”
“I believe you,” Kennedy shifts herself up on her elbows quickly kissing me.
“That’s not all. Last night when I went into the bathroom to grab my phone you must have fallen asleep. I sat there watching you. Just sitting on the edge of the bed and I knew that something had changed in me because when I looked down at you I knew that…” I brush the hair from her eye to behind her ear. I needed to see her when I said what I needed to say.
“You knew what?” Kennedy looks worried about what I’m going to say. She wraps a blanket around her almost seeming that she’s expecting the worst to come from my mouth.
“I knew that I just might be in love with you.” The breath that I’ve been holding in all this time finally releases. The pain from holding it all in dissipates to nothing.
Kennedy doesn’t say anything as she sits full up in the bed. The sunlight’s protruding through her window leaving a cascading yellow hue to cross over her body making her skin glow. Her bare back was exposed to my eyes. I admired the way her spine sticks out just enough to show that she’s slender.
A small tattoo that’s hidden to the rest of the world is just on the inside of her upper ribcage. It’s a pair of ballet shoes. Well, that’s a surprise. I’ll need to ask her about that one later. This only reminds me of what Kennedy has lost because of me. The one thing she loves the most is dance. It’s all been ripped from her grasp. I’m the reason why Kennedy might never dance again and nothing will ever make that okay.
How can I have the nerve to confess these types of feelings I have for Kennedy and expect her to reciprocate them when I have been selfish and untrustworthy all along? How can I expect her to share my feelings when I don’t believe I deserve her? Fuck, I don’t deserve this girl.
“Graham…” Kennedy’s voice is horse. I move my hand to her back continuing to make circles with my fingertips up and down her spine running over the tattoo. “I think I just might love you back.”
She quotes me from last night when I thought she had been sleeping. Relief quickly falls into place knowing that this crazy amazing girl loves me. We both lie down next to each other touching each other and just being in the moment. As we talk, I think that we both let everything catch up with us---Craig’s attack, Kennedy giving me her virginity, then admitting once and for all that we obviously aren’t meant to be friends. It’s a lot for less than 24 hours. There’s no one else I’d rather be lying next to right now making every decision that I’ve made to get here make complete sense.
Kennedy’s parents come home around noon just as I’m pulling up my jeans after lying in bed all morning. We managed to talk for hours about everything except the one thing that’s important. What’s going to happen come Monday? Were we going to stick with the same plan to act like we aren’t completely involved or make it known? I will do whatever she wants because right now she’s all that seems to matter. The idea of hiding what’s happening and what already happened doesn’t sit well with me. I don’t want to hide her like a dirty secret.
The lock on the front door clicks open. Kennedy rushes out of her room as quickly as her crutches will allow greeting her parents before they have the chance to enter her bedroom. I’m left alone in her room hopping around trying to find my shirt. Catching me half naked in their daughter’s room is the worst first impression.
I hear Kennedy’s voice as she speaks to her parents. She stalls the conversation on how the visits to the museums went and if they got to spend much time with her brother. Just the way her family speaks to each other I feel my heart warming. I wish I had what they have.
I know they have their own problems from the argument that I overheard the first night I came here, but in the end I think they only argue for their daughter. They only want what is best for her. I don’t get the whole “I love yo
u” dynamic that her family has. I understand that not every family is perfect and we all have different things that make us barely tolerate each other, but I’d give anything to have my parents speak to me with such adoration the way Kennedy’s speak to her.
At the end of the bed I sit waiting for my cue to leave, to get the hell out of dodge before her Dad barges in here ready to lay my ass out. I debate on jumping out the window but know better than to treat Kennedy as if she’s something I’m trying to escape. I’ll face whatever’s waiting for me on the other side of that door.
I don’t notice Kennedy swing the door open as I’m pulling on a loose thread on my shirt. She’s standing against the doorframe with her ankles crossed with the sexiest smirk I’ve ever seen decorating her face. Something changed in her and I’d like to believe that I have a big part in that change.
“You trying to decide if going out the window would be the fastest route out of here?” Kennedy giggles as she steps closer to me.
“How’d you guess?” I look up just as she finds her spot in front of me holding out her small hand to me.
“The scared look on your face was a dead giveaway. My parents would like to meet you, the boy who’s corrupted me, so get up.” I grab ahold of her hand as she pulls me up onto my feet. She wraps her arms around my neck and whispers in my ear. “You’ll do just fine.”
I cup her head in my hands kissing her on the forehead. “How can you be so sure? Girls love me. Parent’s not so much.”
“Don’t remind me…” Kennedy rolls her eyes. “I like you, so they will too.”
“You like me, huh? I thought you said you might just love me?” I wink at her as she tilts her head to the side in contemplation of what I had said.
“Then I guess they’ll love you,” Kennedy smiles even bigger. My hand sits low on her back as she leads me out of the protection of her bedroom into what would seem like open waters of the deepest ocean. I just know I’m going to be greeted by two protective loving sharks of their young pup. If I were a father I wouldn’t want anyone slightly resembling me around my daughter.
Her parents are sitting on the couch molded together as if they’re still sixteen years old with the television on, but barely paying attention to it. They are too busy talking with each other. Mrs. Conrad’s legs are draped over her husbands. I can’t help admire how much love they have between them. It’s evident. Kennedy doesn’t release her hold on me when we walk together into the living room where we are kept under watchful eyes. I see her father’s eyes scan down to our hands that are now entwined. Instead of pulling away from her grasp I give her a small squeeze trying to reassure her.
“Mom. Dad, this is Graham Black,” Kennedy’s voice is strong as she introduces me.
“It’s very nice to meet you, Mr. and Mrs. Conrad,” I release her hand quickly to shake theirs quickly returning my hand to Kennedy’s. She ushers me over to the loveseat where we sit down waiting for a plethora of questions to fly from her parents. I have just walked out of their daughter’s bedroom when they haven’t been home to protest my whereabouts. Surely that will raise a few flags.
“So, what do you kids have going on today?” Mr. Conrad asks. It appears that Kennedy and I are going to get a free pass for our indiscretions.
“Homework. I’ll be doing that here soon but other than that I don’t think we have anything planned,” Kennedy answers looking over at me for back up.
“What about you, Graham? Do you have homework to do too?” I can tell he’s trying to give me the Daddy of the daughter third degree. I don’t mind. I’ve never had a girlfriend. This makes situations like these easy to avoid. This one I’m willing to walk right into.
I smile at Kennedy who’s waiting for my answer with a glee in her eyes begging me to say that I have homework to do. “I have some homework that I could do.”
“We could always do it together, if you’d like.” Kennedy playfully elbows me in my side causing me to jump in my seat. She never drops her gaze on me. I start to feel self-conscious in front of her parents at the way she’s looking towards me.
“Graham, why don’t you stay for dinner,” Mrs. Conrad’s voice rings through the silence of the room. Her voice sounds just like her daughters, just a pitch higher. I quickly look away from Kennedy turning to face her parents.
“If that’s okay with you sir, I’d love to stay for dinner,” I address Mr. Conrad. I can feel Kennedy’s tight stare bounce between me and her father waiting for his answer. If anything, I learned how to be a gentleman around adults from my Grandmother. She won’t tolerate anything less.
I remember when I was younger my Grandmother would smack us upside our heads if we didn’t address an adult with Sir or Mam. It seemed to stick with me. Too bad she didn’t stress how to treat girls. Maybe I wouldn’t have gotten into some of the situations that I have in the past.
“Only with one condition,” Mr. Conrad’s voice is suddenly unapologetically serious. “Graham, if you hurt my daughter I promise I will hurt you twice as badly.”
“DAD!” Kennedy shouts from her seat on the couch. She’s embarrassed by her father’s threat. Her reaction is sweet.
“Mr. Conrad, I already told your daughter that I’d never intentionally cause her any pain. If you haven’t already, I’m sure you will hear that I don’t have the best reputation, but somehow your daughter see’s something in me worth knowing and I can promise you that I understand that I don’t deserve someone like Kennedy,” I profess in a strong honest voice. My confession surprises me. Mrs. Conrad grins over at her daughter and I making me feel comfortable. I basically confessed my feelings towards their daughter straight out the gate. How embarrassing.
“That’s all I needed to know. You are more than welcome here at our house as long as Kennedy will have you,” he stands up to shake my hand before heading into the kitchen returning with a glass of water.
Mrs. Conrad’s looking at Kennedy with a knowing gleam in her eye. It seems they’re having a silent conversation between the two of them. I can’t see what she’s mouthing to her mother, but I know it has to do with me. Her father sits oblivious of their interaction probably due to several years of enduring these silent exchanges.
Kennedy gets up from the couch leaving me sitting alone with her parents. Rubbing a hole in the top of my jeans seems only a few strokes away from grinding my palms over the denim. I’m more nervous than I thought waiting for her parents to throw another curveball my way.
“Are you coming or not?” Kennedy’s voice comes from her bedroom. I’m not sure if I should follow her or sit exactly where her father can see me. Disrespecting your girlfriend’s parents the first day meeting them is not a way to start off on a good foot. I sit still pretending that I don’t hear her even though my body’s practically throwing itself in her direction in anticipation of just being near her.
“She’s calling for you. You might want to get in there. She can be impatient,” Mrs. Conrad smirks trying her hardest to stifle a laugh. They both fall into a fit of laughter. I think they enjoy watching me uneasy.
“It was nice meeting you and thanks again for allowing me to stay for dinner.” I stand up to walk back towards Kennedy’s room.
I walk through her door closing it behind me to find it empty. The shower’s running. The bathroom door’s ajar allowing steam to leak through the small crack. I sit down on her bed waiting for her to come out patiently twiddling with the fabric on the blanket thinking about what had just happened earlier this morning.
I feel out of place. I push the thoughts to the back of my head. I won’t allow my insecurities to cause a riff in our already fragile relationship. That’s what we had here. We were in a relationship. She had just given up a big chunk of herself to me and now I’d have to prove myself worthy. Could I be good enough for someone like her? I have my doubts.
“Whatcha thinking about, Black?” Kennedy’s voice sings as she walks into the room. My eyes bounce around until I see her walking across her room to her dres
ser with nothing but a towel wrapped around her body.
The small piece of purple cotton fabric barely covers her. I don’t mind. I’m enjoying the show. If she were to pull it up any higher than her ass will be exposed, but if she pulls it down her tits will pop out. She manages to hold the fabric in place (even when I secretly pray for it to drop to the ground) allowing just enough of both to be on display for me. I can tell by the way she smiles that she knows exactly what she’s doing.
“Hasn’t anyone ever told you that it’s not nice to tease others?” I stand with the intention of closing the gap between us. She reaches into one of her dresser drawers to grab a pair of shorts, a tank top, and a pair of black lacy underwear. I suddenly am perfectly in tune with every move she makes and everything her hands grace with her gentle touch. There isn’t getting enough of her for me.
Kennedy walks back to her bathroom and I follow in her wake.
“I don’t think anyone’s ever called me a tease, Mr. Black,” she smiles innocently even though we both know she’s anything but. Just before she grabs the door to shut it behind her she releases the tight hold on the towel letting it pool at her feet. She bravely turns to face me standing there completely naked. “Whoops!”
With a loud bang the door’s slams in my face. I can feel myself beginning to wind up. The only thing that can fulfill my appetite is on the other side of that damn door covering her body in far too much clothing. I know I’d have to be on my best behavior when she comes out. There’s only a short walk and a thin wall dividing us from her parents.
While I wait for her to come out, my mind keeps shouting out to me “What the fuck?” What happened to the innocent Kennedy that shudders under my very touch? She’s been replaced with this strong, confident, flirtatious girl who openly teases me. I’ve created a monster. There will be no complaining from me. I’ll gladly play along with her game of cat and mouse. If she’s going to torture me all day then I can play along until she’s begging for me to touch her.
When Our Worlds Collide Page 21