“She’s so darn cute,” he grins, walking over.
“Yeah, she takes after her momma!”
Ace winks at me. “She sure does.”
“All right, let’s do this.”
The drive out to Jagger’s old house takes a few hours, in that time, Jagger doesn’t move. When we arrive at the large home, I feel an odd feeling swell in my chest. I haven’t been here since the night I ran off, and a flood of emotions fill me as I step out of the car and begin walking closer. Two cars pull up behind us, and I force my eyes away from the house to see Rusty, Bull, Angel, Ava and Jenny. I beam at the site of my sister running towards me. When she reaches me, I wrap my arms around her and hold her tight, squeezing her and breathing her in.
“We have not seen each other enough, Willow.”
“No,” I agree. “We haven’t.”
“How are you?” she asks, pulling back.
“I’m getting there.”
“You should have told me things were getting this bad.”
I smile, but it’s weak. “I thought I could help him.”
“Well, let’s hope this goes well. If not, we’re going to have one hell of a party.”
I roll my eyes at her. “We will party after you tell me about Ace’s competition.”
Her face drops and she peers over my shoulder at Ace, who’s smoking by the car.
“He told you?”
“Ace is my best friend, aside from Ava, so yeah, he told me.”
“It’s complicated. I really do like Ace…”
“Then why are you playing around with another man?”
She sighs. “It’s a long story, I’ll tell you later, ok?”
I frown, and then roll my eyes again. “Ok, later.”
I give everyone else a hug, release the children from the car and then turn to face the yard. To the left, I see rolls of fencing wire and a heap of toys to be put up. I turn to Ace and grin.
“You got all that for Code’s?”
“We can’t have the little man getting bored.”
I step forward and wrap my arms around him. He sighs deeply, and returns the hug with full force.
“Thank you, Ace, for this. For everything.”
“Always, kid.”
I pull back and stare at everyone. Rusty and Bull have pulled Jagger from the car, and are holding his floppy form.
“Thank you all so much for this. If keeping him out here doesn’t work, at least he has you all here. Maybe we can find a way to show him what it was he was so passionate about before.”
They all smile and nod.
“Ready?” Angel asks, dangling the keys in my face.
I swallow. “I’m ready.”
Ava is bouncing Leila in her arms, and Cody is running around like a mad child, thrilled with his new surroundings. When Angel gathers him up, much to his dismay, and carries him inside, I know it’s time to step into the past. I take a deep breath and step inside. The house hasn’t changed a bit, aside from the fact that it’s extremely dusty. I feel my heart clench as we walk up the stairs into the main living areas. I stare at the couch where Jagger patched me up, I stare at the kitchen where I tried to take my own life. So many memories. So much has happened since the days I was in this house. Jenny squeezes my hand and I give her my best attempt at a smile.
“How are you feeling?” she asks.
“It’s strange to be back, but it’s the best place we can be. He loved it out here.”
“Yeah, I’ve heard him talking about it.”
“All right,” Rusty and Bull say, dropping Jagger onto the couch. “Now we wait for him to wake.”
“How exactly did you knock him out?” I ask Ace.
“I drugged him.”
I sigh in relief.
“Did you think I literally knocked him out?” he snorts, laughing.
“Shut up, Ace,” I pout. “I wouldn’t put it past you.”
He chuckles. “No, I’m far too nice. All right, you girls need to go and get some food so we can all survive out here. We need to clean the place up. Willow, I’ll leave Jagger’s room to you.”
“Yes boss,” I mock.
Ace gives me a look and then turns to Jenny. “Before you get food, can we talk?”
Jenny nods, and they disappear into the other room. Everyone else begins preparing the house to make it livable. I stare over at Jagger’s bedroom door. Well, here goes. I walk slowly over, the floor creaks under my feet. When I reach his room, I open it and step in, flicking on the light. I stare at the large bed, with its dark covers. I walk in, unable to help the smile that creeps across my face as I remember being with Jagger on this very bed. I remember it like it was yesterday.
“You know the moment in life, when everything you thought you were is suddenly wrong? The moment that changes everything? It changes who you are, who you believe you are and who you’re going to be. You’re that moment, Willow.”
He whispers these words into my ear and my whole body gives way. I melt into the mattress, and into him. He doesn’t move his body off mine; instead, he pushes into me once more; his cock sliding into my wet heat and causing a whimper to escape. He moves slowly over me, sliding his hips backwards and forwards until I am shuddering and crying out once more.
“I hate that I want you, but I can’t stop,” he whispers into my ear, “I can’t stop this.”
“I know, oh God, I know.”
“Move your ass up Willow, let me fuck you deeper.”
His words cause a shiver to run through me. I raise my ass and he grips my hips, driving harder into me. I groan and tangle my fingers in the sheets until I’m coming around him again. He brings me to orgasm with his fingers on my clit and his length sliding in and out of me at least two more times before he finally finds another release of his own.
I find myself sobbing as I remember the times we had together when we finally realized our feelings were far deeper than we first thought. I pick up one of Jagger’s old shirts, and I run my fingers over the soft cotton before bringing it to my nose and inhaling. It still smells like him and god, it makes me miss him. I miss everything about him. I miss that hard ass male that took no shit from no one. I miss the man that made me laugh, cry and scream. I miss the gentle, sweet, loving man he could be when he wanted to. The man who risked his life for me. I have to fix this, I have to help him. I owe him that much.
“Hey, are you ok?”
I turn to see Angel staring at me from the doorway.
“Hey, Angel, sorry. I’m ok.”
“It’s ok to feel the way you’re feeling, Willow.”
I stare at him, and then nod softly. “Do you think I’m making a mistake?”
He walks in, gripping my hands and sitting us on the bed.
“No, I think you’re doing what you have to do, to survive. I’m proud of you, Willow, the old you would have crumbed, but you’ve made a decision and you’ve stuck to it. You’re trying to fix your husband. You’re trying to save him. You’re trying to protect him from falling apart, it takes a brave person to risk what you’re about to.”
“I couldn’t do it without all of you.”
“What the fuck?”
I hear Jagger’s booming voice, and quickly leap to my feet. Angel follows quickly behind me as I rush out. Jagger is standing, glaring at Ace, Rusty and Bull. They’re giving him sympathetic glances. When I walk out, he spins on me and storms over, but Angel stands in his way.
“Fuckin’ move, Angel.”
“No, you’re not going to take this out on her, boss.”
“You all fuckin’ drugged me and brought me to a house I hate, and you think I’m just going to sit here calmly?”
I step around Angel, and Jagger glares so hard at me I’m sure he’s about to shoot daggers.
“You left me,” I whisper, forcing the tears threatening to come to my eyes, away. “You told me you can’t feel. I had to do something.”
“You give up, Willow. That’s what you do!”
“
No,” I say, finding my voice. “I don’t give up. That wasn’t part of the deal, Jagger. I won’t let you do this to yourself or to your family. We are doing what we have to do!”
“What the fuck do you hope to achieve by locking me in this house?”
“I want you to…feel.”
His voice is throaty and raw with anger when he snarls, “I feel, I feel so fuckin’ angry I want to rip someone’s head off.”
“That’s good,” I say carefully. “Any feeling is better than none.”
“This won’t change things for me, fuck, what is wrong with you lot? I am capable of makin’ my own fuckin’ choices.”
“No, boss, you’re not. You don’t see it, but you’re sinkin’. We wouldn’t be part of a brotherhood if we let that happen,” Angel says, his voice carefully controlled.
Jagger spins on him, gripping his shirt and slamming him against a nearby wall.
“I will hurt you, Angel. Don’t put it past me.”
“If it helps, go ahead.”
Jagger stares at him, shocked, then he drives his fist into the wall beside Angel’s head. Plaster shatters around them, and falls to the floor in little pieces. I hear the sound of Cody’s laugh coming up the stairs and I watch Jagger stiffen.
“You brought my kid?” he hisses, turning to me.
I nod, meeting his gaze dead on. “I did.”
“What the fuck is wrong with you?”
“I’m doing what I have to, Jagger, yell at me all you want.”
“You’ll get nothin’ from me,” he yells, to the room in general. “Nothin’. So whatever you think you’re going to achieve from all this, you’re wrong. I won’t give you nothin’!”
Then he storms past us all and into his room, slamming the door so loudly it splits. I look at everyone and let out a deep sigh.
“It’s a start,” Angel says, patting my shoulder.
“He hates us.”
“He will get over it. Give him time.”
I stare at the door, and then back to the boys. I hope we’ve made the right choice here.
~*~*~*~*~
JAGGER
Fucking cunts. That’s all they are. Cunts. How dare they fuckin’ lock me up in this house. Who the fuck do they think they are? Any emotion I had towards them, is now fuckin’ gone. I don’t want to be here, they know I don’t want to be here. They think if they break me, I’ll feel again. They’ve got no fuckin’ idea how much I’ve sunk, they have no idea that all they’re doing, is wasting their time and mine. They should have let me go. Willow had to fuckin’ stick her nose in and now I’m stuck in this fuckin’ house.
I dig through my jeans, and pull out a semi squashed packet of smokes. Fuck them, they want to play with me, I’ll play right back. They won’t fuckin’ win this one, hell to the fuckin’ no. I won’t let them get to me. All they’re doing is making me want to run further. Why couldn’t they just fuckin’ accept my decision? Always the fuckin’ heroes. I’m done with this bullshit. I take a deep drag of my cigarette and blow the air out in front of me. I’m not a smoker usually, but it helps, and besides, Willow fuckin’ hates it. Let’s see how she reacts to this one.
~*~*~*~*
WILLOW
Leila’s crying stirs me from my afternoon sleep. I went to lay down with her after the emotional morning we had. I flutter my eyes open and stare at the ceiling fan spinning around and around. Leila cries again, and I turn my head to the side. She’s sitting up in her crib, peering at me through the bars. Smiling, I sit up and stretch. I slip out of bed and walk over, lifting her from the crib. She gurgles and whines a little more. I peer down at the time, it’s after four pm. I guess we slept a few hours. Ace and Angel said they would watch Jagger, so I assume everything is still going well. He hadn’t left his room when I came to lay down.
When I change Leila and carry her out into the kitchen, everyone is standing around the counter whispering softly. They stop what they’re doing when they notice me, and all turn to stare. “What’s going on?” I ask, and the nod towards Jagger’s door where I can hear the sound of blaring music.
“He’s had that going for two hours now. None of us are game to go in.”
I roll my eyes and hand Leila over to Jenny. “Where’s Cody?”
“Sleeping still.”
“Fine, I’ll go in.”
I turn and walk towards Jagger’s door. When I turn the handle and fling it open, my ears are blessed with the pounding sound of music. Magic. I peer into the room, and Jagger is sitting on his bed, smoking a cigarette and watching something on television. Jagger doesn’t smoke. What kind of bullshit game is he playing? When he notices me, and he turns his head to look at me, his face is completely emotionless as he lifts one side of his mouth up in a cocky smile, and it’s not a nice smile, it’s a mean smile. He knows I don’t like him smoking. He knows it and he’s doing it anyway. I know what he’s doing, he’s trying to show me nothing is going to bother him. That my little plan won’t work. That he’ll break me before I break him.
“What if it was Cody that came in here?” I say, walking over and pulling the cigarette from his mouth. I crush it in the beer bottle beside the bed.
He doesn’t move his eyes from my face. He’s watching me, just watching. He’s testing me. Trying to piss me off. It won’t work.
“He can’t reach the door handle,” he says simply.
“What are you doing, Jagger?” I say, feeling my frustration building inside.
He raises a brow and slides off the bed, removing his shirt. I swallow, feeling my eyes widen at the site of his delectable body. It takes everything inside me to keep my face empty.
“Are you high?” I finally say, crossing my arms.
He grins at me, but it’s not his usual gorgeous grin, it’s so cold and empty. “I wish.”
“I know what you’re doing, and it’s not going to work. If you want to sit in here and smoke yourself stupid, you go right ahead.”
I turn to walk out.
“You can join me, baby…maybe we can find other things to do.”
The way he said that, it makes me want to slap him. It’s so cold. So…not the Jagger I love. God, was this a bad idea? Did I make a mistake bringing him here and trying to bring him out of his shell? Maybe I did. Maybe this was all a mistake. I hate how he makes me second guess myself and my choices.
I turn and meet his blue eyes. “No thanks, if I want heartless sex I can go up to a bar and get it all on my own, thanks.”
“But you wouldn’t.”
I look him dead in the eye when I say the next words. “Wouldn’t I?”
Then, I step out and slam the door. I didn’t see his reaction, and I don’t honestly care. I’m angry at him, for the way he just looked at me. He’s trying to hurt me, trying to break me, so I’ll just tell him to get out and never look back. I know exactly what game he’s playing, but what he fails to understand is that I can play harder. He knows what he is doing is wrong. He fucking knows it.
When I get back into the kitchen, everyone turns to me, eyes wide, waiting for my reaction. “He’s just being a jerk, it’s fine,” I say to the room in general.
Ace looks sad for me but it’s Bull that walks over and touches my shoulder.
“We’ll find a way, in fact, we’ve been talking about something that just might work.”
“Oh?” I ask, walking into the kitchen and turning on the coffee machine.
“Well, you remember that Jagger was quite a jealous person.”
I snort. “You think?”
Bull chuckles, but it’s not a sound full of humor.
“Well, we were thinking…what if he got…I don’t know…jealous?”
I raise my brows, and pull the warm mug of coffee into my hands. “I don’t think he would care right now, I really don’t. He’s completely blocked himself off. I don’t even think he knows who he is or what he wants right now, I don’t think it will matter what I do.”
“Look, I think it’s worth a shot. He
was insanely protective of you before, if he thinks him pushing you away might cause you to look elsewhere…”
“He knows I wouldn’t,” I say, giving him a weak smile. “He knows I love him.”
“Maybe, but you don’t have to be looking as such, just confiding,” Ava says.
“You think this is a good idea?” I say, shocked.
“I think anything is worth a shot, Willow.”
I sigh. “All right, if you all think it will work.”
“It might not work,” Ace says. “But it might make him think, or at least feel some sort of emotion. That’s got to be a start. I’ve never seen him like this. He’s so…vacant.”
“I know,” I murmur, wrapping my arms around myself and shuddering. “He worries me.”
We hear Jagger’s door open, and all of us turn. Jagger steps out, still without a shirt. He looks at us all, then walks into the kitchen without greeting any of us. He stops and kisses Leila on the head, but aside from that, he doesn’t show anything major.
“We’re having a few people over tonight, boss.” Rusty says.
I give him a look, what’s he up to?
“Do whatever you want, I don’t give a fuck. Where’s the whiskey?”
I meet Ace’s eyes, it’s him who answers Jagger’s question.
“We don’t have any.”
Jagger walks right up to him until they’re nearly nose to nose, then he leans down, reaches around him and grips his keys. Ace’s hand snaps out quickly, stopping him. Jagger looks down at Ace’s hand, then back up to his face.
“Get your fuckin’ hand off me, Ace.”
“No, you’re not leaving. That’s the point of this.”
“Then you leave and go and get me what I need.”
“No,” I answer for Ace, in the strongest voice I can muster. “You’re not drinking. Your kids are here and they don’t need to see that.”
Jagger turns to me, and goes to argue but quickly closes his mouth.
Dark Destiny (Dark Brothers Book #4) Page 5