by Mayer, Dale
After his swim, they headed outside to where the horses were. Molly was in the pasture with Stan. Her hoof was healing, but she was confused by fences and by the different bushes in the paddocks. Aaron still couldn’t believe somebody had kept a horse in a house. What was wrong with people?
“She is beautiful,” Dani said happily. “I’m so glad that when we first converted this place just for Dad’s recuperation, we kept the space for the animals intact.”
He turned to look at her. “How did that come about?” He waved an arm and said, “It’s a great pairing, but at the same time, not exactly what most people would think to do.”
“It was a former veterinary school, which offered very specialized training. The doctors and residents were housed upstairs, and a full veterinarian clinic, including a surgery ward, was on the main floor.” She turned to look at the buildings and fields around them. “When it closed and fell into disrepair, the property dropped in value. At the time, my father was desperately in need of something to help him through his pain, his loss and he bought it. Because the upstairs was easier for him to navigate, he set up in one room and brought in physiotherapy on a regular basis. A local vet asked about using the existing facilities for his practice, which started the animal side of things. The vet worked downstairs, and the animals came and went on a regular basis. Then two of dad’s cronies moved in, and the physiotherapy part increased, and it just evolved from there.”
“It’s nice to see what you started with grew into a business with your own two hands.”
“Actually it snowballed,” she confessed. “Luckily Gram was here for him at the time as I was studying business. Each week when I came to see how Dad was doing, I realized this place had changed him, given him a whole new lease on life. Plus, he was getting stronger physically. I decided to stay and commit myself to the project with him. Now look at the place,” she said with a big smile.
“It’s pretty amazing,” Aaron said. “I’d love to have been a part of this. Of the development and construction.”
“There were days, weeks, where I didn’t think we’d make it.”
“It’s not just a business—you’re helping people, and you’re helping animals.” He turned, leaning his back against the rails, and stared up at the massive two-storied facility. “You even have room to expand, if you need to.”
She laughed wryly. “I’m not sure I could handle much more.”
A waft of warm air hit the back of Aaron’s neck. He turned to look at Maggie behind him. He reached up a hand and gently caressed the older mare. “The animals need help just as much as people. Your place here is massive.”
“Yes, it is.” She studied the building. “Dad’s responsible for bringing in some of the modern facilities, like the pool, and the handicap ramps and rails. Everybody deserves a chance to heal in whatever way they require.”
He nodded and gave her a small smile. “Well, I do appreciate it.”
She smiled back, slipping her arm through his, and said, “Good. How about we get a cup coffee before I head to my place?”
“How about we take that coffee and go to your place?” he said with a laugh, knowing it wasn’t possible, might never be.
She grinned. “Wishful thinking on your part, mister. No undercover activities for you for quite a while.” She gave him a comic leer.
He chuckled, relieved to see he could joke about the subject. “Undercover? I don’t think I’ve ever heard it referred to in that way before.” He rolled it around on his lips and said, “But I do like it.”
“What, the activities or the word?” she teased.
He leaned in and kissed her gently on the cheek. “Both.”
She smiled and kissed him directly.
With the sun going down and his heart hammering against his chest, this was as poignant as it was beautiful. He reached up to cup her face. He turned her slightly and kissed her properly. Deeply. Passionately.
When she responded with a fiery heat of her own, he spun just enough to pin her against the fence, his body holding her captive in his arms. He shared a little of his passion. If she had any idea how much he wanted her, she’d run for the hills. As she met him kiss for kiss, as her arms reached up and around his neck to hold him close while her hips pressed tight against his, he realized she was a perfect match for him in every way.
Then he felt something else. Something he hadn’t felt in a very long time. He withdrew his lips and crushed her against his chest. He’d been afraid for so long his body had forgotten how to make love. Maybe he was injured to a point where the doctors hadn’t even been aware. Like something was wrong with him mentally or physically or emotionally, and therefore, he’d never make love to someone again. But the proof was in his arms as his body responded in the most satisfying way.
Overwhelmed, he buried his face against her neck and just held her close.
Chapter 12
Was he crying? She wasn’t sure what was going on, but something major was breaking for him. He held her so tight, as if he would never let her go. She reached up to stroke his cheek, and sure enough, she felt wetness at the corners of his eyes. That made her heart ache all the more for him. She wrapped her arms around him and hugged him close. Finally he regained some control and released her. He stepped back slightly, a bit of a cocky smile on his lips, and leaned on the fence. “Sorry. That went a little further than I intended.”
She smiled up at him. “Nice to know that much passion is on the inside.” She reached out and stroked his bottom lip.
“Hey, that’s my line,” he said with a smile. “If I ever get out of that hospital bed permanently, you know what’s coming.”
“When you leave that hospital bed,” she teased, “you know exactly where I live.” She patted his cheek. “It will be months yet as nothing should distract you or slow down your healing process. And on that note,” she added, “I’ll head to my cabin.” She reached up and brushed a gentle kiss across his lips, then turned and left him staring after her.
It was a beautiful evening, but she had shivers racing up and down her arms, which she tucked against her chest to hide. She just needed a few minutes alone. The passion they had shared took her by surprise and frankly shook her to her core. She’d always thought they’d be explosive if they ever got together. Yet, she’d never expected them to be a couple, so she hadn’t had any real hope of that evolving. Now it was all she could think about.
She was sure she wouldn’t get any sleep tonight. That man was lethal. And she couldn’t be happier. She’d also felt his response to her and had wondered if that had been part of his overwhelming emotion. One day he might tell her. In the meantime, she’d do what she’d always done and just accept every step of progress he made with gratefulness.
She wasn’t a prude, and she’d been through enough herself. She also knew she couldn’t just go to bed with somebody without caring, without that emotional connection. She’d been there, done that and regretted every last minute. But she’d also been to bed with men who she had thought were forever, and that hadn’t worked out so well either.
As a young girl, a teenager on the brink of womanhood, she’d attended all the parties and get-togethers where everyone went for the easy sex. That was the reason she’d ended up with Levi. He’d been interested, but she hadn’t been, not in that way, and somehow they’d still remained friends—a friendship that had lasted as he went through several girlfriends over time. He’d watched her go through half as many boyfriends.
She’d been a good girl—the sweet, simple innocent girl on the block. Growing up, Gram had been the strict moral influence in her life with black-and-white views of what was right and what was wrong. Dani had been terrified of having sex because of Gram. It took Dani a long time to take that step. She figured Gram was watching over her and would poke her in the ribs—like she used to all the time—and say, “Stop that!”
On the other hand, Aaron had been a party animal. That had never appealed to her. She had been raised dif
ferently. But coming of age with two very sexual males, Aaron and Levi, had been an alluring temptation to change her way of life. Still, she knew better. The only way to protect herself was to back off and shut down that part of her. It had worked well.
She went to college and found someone she cared for, and she thought that was it. They had a year-long relationship, and, just when she thought he would ask her to marry him, he broke it off instead.
She’d been devastated. It was a hard lesson, but one she’d learned from, and she went on to several other relationships. Another one almost ready for that wedding ring. Her father had hated that man—Jim. Dad had tried so hard to stop her from marrying the wrong man.
She wondered if she was just getting too old for relationships. “On the shelf,” as her grandmother would’ve said. Maybe she needed to just accept her life as it was. She shook her head. Like hell she did.
Aaron had always been the one who made her pulse jump. When he walked into a room, she lost the ability to speak coherently. Levi had laughed at her. The last thing he’d wanted was her hooking up with his playboy brother. So he’d done his best to keep them apart. Maybe that had been a good thing. Back then, it wouldn’t have been so sweet. But now she wasn’t that same foolish girl, and Aaron was no longer the playboy, and she really liked what she had discovered about him.
She was glad they’d had these months together, getting reacquainted. They would have been more perfect if Levi had found something about Cain. Dani believed it was a necessary step for Aaron’s healing. She just didn’t know how Aaron would react if there was no happy ending. Would it keep him down for the rest of his life, or would he finally put the past behind him and move on?
Heavy questions. She knew from her own experience that men dissatisfied with life became very difficult over time. That was why Jim had gotten more and more abusive. It had started out small, with just insults and comments about not looking after herself, or not wearing makeup and not caring enough to pretty herself up for her man.
She shook her head at the hard memories. Now she knew he’d simply been grooming her to accept even worse treatment down the road—because, of course, it had gotten worse. Much worse. At that time, she was working at the center full-time, and Jim was a mainstay here. Everybody else wasn’t happy about their relationship, but very few said anything to her about it. When some did, she didn’t welcome their criticism. Of course she didn’t—she was in a relationship, looking forward to getting married and maybe starting that family she wanted.
The abuse had worsened. A couple people told him off, and Jim got belligerent and ugly. He had his revenge in private. He’d been living with her, in her house, for six months. She hadn’t realized just how much the stress had affected her until her father took her to one side and said she had to stop.
“Don’t you see what’s happening to you? You’ve lost weight. You’re jumpy and timid. You’re easily startled. A door slams, and you’re ready to break apart.” Dad shook his head and wrapped his arms around her. “Dani, I love you. I can’t stand to see you tortured this way. Get rid of him.”
“It’s not that bad,” Dani whined.
“How bad does it have to get?” her father snapped. “He beats you, and the next time he could kill you.” He shook his head. “I’ve already lost your mother. I couldn’t lose you too—and never that way.”
At that point she could see the fissures in Jim’s personality. Then they quickly became major cracks. She just didn’t know how to heal them. She had tried to explain this to her father, but he’d been adamant.
“There is no healing this. It will just get worse.”
She looked back over that long year and had finally become aware of the slow and insidious increase in abuse, which she’d learned to accept. Then came the final straw for her. They’d had a fight. A huge fight. He’d beaten her thoroughly this time. When he stormed out of the house that night, he had tossed all kinds of insults at her. She picked up the phone and called 9-1-1, asking for both an ambulance and the sheriff, and finally called her father.
Jim remained in jail, somewhere in the middle of the country. She hoped he never came back. She’d done everything she could to make sure he stayed where he was for as long as possible.
Thankfully he hadn’t broken her body physically that night, though God knows she had plenty of bruises and sprains and dislocated fingers and even one shoulder. All that was truly damaged was her trust and her heart and, of course, her soul. She’d come to understand the healing effect of the animals because she’d spent more time downstairs with them than she had upstairs in her own medical bed. She had needed that. Later she’d emerged feeling a whole lot more balanced. Capable of smiling again, even though she still didn’t talk about it. Her father had brought it up once or twice but only as a sign that she was handling life better now.
How interesting that he hadn’t said anything about Aaron. Because, yes, Aaron was dealing with some difficult stuff, but she didn’t see the same issues of abuse inherent in him—despite his own father being abusive. After all, Levi wasn’t like that. Maybe she should ask her father, just for added confirmation. If she had listened to his advice about Jim in the first place, things wouldn’t have gotten so bad.
As she walked into the house, she found her father sitting in front of the big picture window overlooking the complex, holding a cup of tea. She walked over and sat down, slipping her hand into his free one.
He looked at her for a long moment and then said, “You’ve been looking very happy these last few days. What’s bothering you now?”
“Earlier you said Aaron would have a hard time adapting.” She searched his eyes. “Did you mean he would end up like Jim?”
He placed his cup of tea down, his eyebrows shooting upward. “Oh, my dear, no. No, not at all. I don’t see the same abuse or violence in Aaron. Believe me, if you were falling down that rabbit hole again, I would have said so immediately. No. That’s not it. What I do see is self-incrimination. He blames himself for something terrible. Like he’s a prisoner to this issue. He has to let it go, or he’ll never be happy. And, by extension, you won’t be either.”
She reached her arms around her dad and hugged him tight. “I thought about Gram today,” Dani said as she settled in her chair next to Dad. “I miss her.”
Her father smiled. “She was a force, that’s for sure.”
“I’m grateful she helped raise me,” Dani said. “I’m even more grateful she was there when you were sick. Because I didn’t know who else to turn to. Without her, I would have been lost.”
“You and me both,” he admitted. “In my darkest days, she swung the light so I could find the way back. I knew, deep down, that I needed to be there for you, but she had to point that out to me.” He shook his head. “She never let me forget it was my duty to make the best of every day and to not just walk away because it was easy.” He laughed. “Sometimes nothing was easy about my life, but you? Well, you are truly a blessing.”
He grabbed her hand again. “This is the happiest time of my life now. You have put so much life and energy into this place,” he said. “To see all of it coming together, and to have all these new friends coming to this place, then going on to have full and satisfied lives … Well, you should be happy with what you’ve accomplished.”
She smiled and shook her head. “This isn’t what I accomplished, Dad. It’s what we accomplished.”
They sat in companionable silence for a while, looking out the window as the sun slowly settled over top of the complex. Just when she thought she might get up and make herself a cup of tea, he asked in a low voice, “What will you do when it’s time for him to leave?”
She settled back into place. “What do you mean?”
He turned to look at her directly. His gaze was clear and honest but also searching as he studied her. “His life isn’t here. He’ll leave and pick up the pieces of wherever his life was. Will you stay, or will you leave?”
She stared at him in a
stonishment. “I’m not leaving. I’m not going anywhere.”
“Aren’t you?” he asked quietly, sadly. “What if it’s the only way you can keep Aaron?”
She stared at him in stunned amazement. It had never even occurred to her, but it was possible Aaron would need to leave. If that happened, what would she do? Her voice low, she gave her dad the truth. “I have no idea.”
Aaron leaned against the fence, watching her as she walked toward her house, her trim figure moving smartly. She stopped to caress one of the horses, who nickered at her across the fence. He smiled. She did love animals.
The center was an ideal place for her. This was where she belonged.
As soon as that thought crossed his mind, he shuffled around so he could stare out across the fence and horses. If this was where she belonged, it followed that she wouldn’t be happy if she had to leave. Could she leave? This was her place. Not like she could just sell her shares and move on. Although she could hire a new manager fairly easily. But she and her father had fashioned this place into what it was today.
So what about him then? Was he thinking about a permanent relationship with her?
No doubt that he wanted more, but he was hardly a good bet. He didn’t have a job. He was settling into his physio and scheduled for a minor surgery here. Martha, one of the team, had intimated that after a couple tweaks on the stump, he could have a different—better—prosthesis made. In other words, he was healing. He looked forward to a future that wouldn’t require him to stay here. But if he wasn’t here, then how would he carry on a relationship with Dani? If he wanted to further that relationship, how did he stay here?
He stared out across at the pasture, tormented by the unending thoughts. His surroundings were truly stunning, but what did he have to contribute? He was a soldier. A fighting machine. Or, at least, that was what he had been. He didn’t have very many skills that he could convert to a civilian life. He understood he was at a crossroads and capable of making his own choices right now.