by Mayer, Dale
Stan had said he could use the help, but that didn’t mean the center could afford to hire somebody. It was one thing for Aaron to stay here and help out while he was a patient, but it was an entirely different matter to help out afterward but not get paid. That obviously wouldn’t work either. How could he live with himself if his wife supported him? He was all for women’s rights, sure, but that “kept man” scenario wouldn’t work for him either. He needed to at least help financially in a relationship and be a fully independent, contributing member of society. He didn’t care about who was the so-called breadwinner of the family, but he needed to know that, should anything happen and the center be forced to close down, he was fully capable of supporting her.
Just thinking about the word “wife” made him feel warm inside. Was it even possible? With a final glance at the fields, he realized no answers were out there, so he grabbed his crutches and slowly made his way back to his room.
He hoped his brother would call soon. He opened his wallet and pulled out the only picture he had of Levi. After a decade of hoping to never hear his brother’s voice again, all he could do now was wait and stare at the phone, wishing that something would finally break for him.
He sat down on the bed, only mildly tired. He was getting stronger. All because he was here.
The center had a hell of a system. How he’d gotten in, he didn’t know. With his upcoming surgery and the cost of the prosthesis … The military had covered him for months, but then he’d been informed he was now down to his disability pension. Just what did that mean? Seemed to him the permanent loss of his leg—not to mention the end of his military career—entitled him to some permanent benefits. He would make the needed phone calls tomorrow to see where he stood. After that, he could plan. Maybe he would go back to school. He’d saved for years, but would it be enough?
Then again, maybe there was no money for such dreams. He didn’t know if any navy benefits would allow him to rehabilitate himself into a new career—or if grant money was available for him. But it was certainly worth asking, and for the first time, he realized he would ask. He’d let life run its own course for a long time. Now he would pick up the reins and direct the way he wanted to go.
Soon he was in bed, pleased and happy to see that his body was not totally exhausted this time. When his phone rang, he checked the caller ID. His brother. Excited, yet nervous at the same time, he pushed himself into a sitting position and answered.
“Aaron, it’s Levi.”
Levi’s tone was grim, and Aaron’s heart sank. “I gather there’s no news?”
“There is news,” Levi said cautiously. “Your MIA buddy might not be MIA. We’ve got word he’s in Afghanistan, operating as a mercenary.”
Aaron straightened. “You ran him down?”
“Not yet,” Levi cautioned. “But the intel seems good. We’ve spoken to a friend in Africa who has contacts there. With any luck, we can talk to him.”
“Even if you do, no way he’ll tell you the truth. It’s not his style.” Aaron knew that fact, to his own detriment.
“Yeah, but we’re hoping somebody will talk to him and gain his trust.”
Aaron was silent, thinking about Levi’s suggestion.
Then Levi added, “This issue could take a little bit longer to resolve than we’d hoped.”
“And therefore costly,” Aaron said flatly. “I don’t have any money to help pay for this.”
“I didn’t ask for any money,” Levi snapped. “Just pulling in a few favors. No money’s exchanging hands here at all.”
Aaron took a deep breath. “Good to know,” he said in a more neutral tone. “I’m a little sensitive on that whole charity thing.”
An odd silence hovered on the other end, but then his brother didn’t know him anymore either. Had they ever known each other?
Levi remained silent, so Aaron continued. “Thanks for the update. Let me know if you track him down in person. Even proving he’s alive would be a big help. The navy didn’t believe me when I said Cain had walked away. If they catch him, that proves one of my statements, and maybe that will give credence to the others as well.”
“Will do.”
Aaron stared down at the phone in his hand, excitement surging through his system. It would be hard to sleep now because not just excitement bothered him—there was anger too. To think that asshole had created a whole new life for himself, with no repercussions for his actions, was untenable. No way could Aaron let that continue, but without proof, he couldn’t move forward.
No money had changed hands. Good. He didn’t want to be beholden to Levi in any way. He didn’t want to owe anybody and definitely not his brother. It just went back to that whole sibling rivalry thing, having an older brother looking after him. At this point, he wanted to be his own man. Hell, he already was his own man. He didn’t need his brother’s charity.
He didn’t need charity from anyone.
Except that small voice in the back of his head told him he was already accepting his brother’s help. That finding Cain was charity on Levi’s part. But Aaron had damned-well accepted it as his only option. Yet, he also recognized how it was very good of Levi to even consider this.
Then he understood. If somebody had treated Levi that way, Aaron would have stepped up too.
Reminding him, blood was thicker than water.
Chapter 13
The next morning, Dani stood in the doorway of Aaron’s bedroom. She found it empty, even though it was earlier than normal. Frowning, she went to the reception area and on through to the dining room, built around a big circular layout. No matter which direction she took, she would end up in the big open space where breakfast was being served. She studied everybody seated at the tables but still saw no sign of him. Trying to appear casual, she poured herself a cup of coffee and wandered onto the deck, searching. Maybe he’d gone out with the animals. She’d done that a few times, particularly after a bad night. The animals offered comfort that few humans could because along with that comfort, they didn’t add judgment. What a glorious feeling to know they accepted you and didn’t care about the other issues in your life.
She took the stairs down to the lower level and heard a splash in the pool. Then she knew. He’d gone for an early morning swim. With a bright smile on her face, she walked to the edge of the pool and studied him. He’d either had a hell of a bad night or had woken up to a hell of a bad morning because he wasn’t just swimming, he was driving his body forward, forcing it to be stronger. She’d never seen him swim this hard or this fast. A relentless determination was in his strokes, as if he could outswim something bothering him.
When he flipped and turned at the far end and came back and then repeated it again and again and again, she knew something was seriously wrong. With her heart sinking, she sat down casually to wait. When he finally broke off and stopped, his lungs were heaving, and he gasped for air. She waited for him to turn and look around, only he didn’t. He rolled onto his back and did a lazy backstroke to the shallow end. There he pulled himself up and sat on the side of the pool.
“Good morning,” she said in a low voice.
He turned to look at her, but no smile was on his face. From the fatigue in his muscles, it looked like he’d overdone the swimming too.
“That was quite a swim you just had,” she said in a neutral tone.
He shook his head. “I don’t know about a swim, but it felt like the devil was chasing me.” He grabbed his towel and quickly ran it over his face and his upper body. He maneuvered to the bench and pulled himself up. There, he strapped on one of the early prosthetic prototypes, with extra padding around his stump, and grabbed his crutches, just in case. He slowly made his way to her.
As he grew closer, she saw his hands trembling. She quickly got up and pulled out a chair for him. “Sit down,” she scolded. “You’ve overdone it again.”
He shook his head. “Did I?” He gave her a lopsided grin and said, “It’s probably a good thing. Tough night. I n
eeded to work off some frustration.”
She slowly retook her chair. “What brought it on?”
“Levi called me.” He studied the coffee cup in her hand and then looked at the stairs, as if contemplating whether he had the energy to make the trip.
She kept her gaze on his, her heart tingling in worry at the thought of what Levi might’ve said. “And?”
Aaron shrugged. “Some intel came back saying the asshole who did this to me may be working as a mercenary in Afghanistan.”
Her mouth dropped open, and she stared at him. “Oh, my God, that’s wonderful news!”
He stared at her moodily. “Is it? So he has gone on to live the life he wanted, with no repercussions for his actions, and yet look at the end result for me …” He pointed to where his leg should be.
She reached across and covered his fingers with hers. “It also means that, if anybody can catch him, they can prove he isn’t MIA and that you didn’t lie.”
“That’s what I told Levi. But it still doesn’t mean Cain will admit to what he did. Because, of course, why would he? He killed two US soldiers.”
She gently stroked his hand, trying to find the right words to help him deal with this. She now understood the drive behind the swimming. Maybe it’d been the best thing for him after all, but he’d obviously overdone it because he was shaky and exhausted. “Do you want a cup of coffee?” she asked.
He shook his head. “No more making it easy on me. If I want coffee, I’ll get up the damned stairs and get coffee. Bad enough Levi’s doing this instead of me handling it.”
“You have a real problem with charity, don’t you?” she asked quietly, her heart sinking. If he had any idea what she and Levi had concocted between them to get Aaron here … She finally understood just how big a problem that would be for him.
He stared at her, silent.
“Maybe you should change your perspective on that and see it as a helping hand,” she pressed on. “If people don’t know you’re in need, they can’t help. Sometimes they have to be told.”
“I don’t want to accept a helping hand.”
“Nobody wants to be in a position where they have to accept a helping hand,” she retorted. “But you, my father and even I have all done it when necessary. So you accept it. You get back on your feet, and then you move forward. If you can pay it back, you do, and if not, you accept that you will turn around and help somebody else when the time is right.” By now her voice had turned hard and snappy.
She liked a lot of things about Aaron but not his “poor me” attitude. He would have to get over that damned fast because she wouldn’t take much more of it. She also knew fear was driving her because once Aaron found out about Levi paying for his brother’s stay here, the shit would hit the fan. And she’d be part of the fallout. If that was the case, she would do all she could to push this guy, mentally, physically and emotionally. Then he could move on to have a good life. Even if that meant without her.
But instead of her words spurring him into action, he studied her, his brows knit together on his forehead. She realized she’d opened a can of worms she hadn’t meant to.
“You never mentioned you were here in a hospital bed.”
She sat back and gave him a cool stare. “Why should I?”
At that he had the grace to blush. “I’m sorry. That’s your private matter. And I’m being a bit of a bear, aren’t I?”
She gave a serious and decisive nod. “Yes. Lots of people are here to help you, but they can only help you if you’re willing to accept it. There’s not always a price tag for help in this world.”
She picked up her cup, finished it and said, “I’m getting a second cup of coffee.” With that she turned and walked up the stairs. She didn’t look to see if he was following her. If he didn’t want any more help, that was fine with her. She wouldn’t deliver any more cups of tea or coffee, even though she had no problem with that. Because to her, that wasn’t charity. It was being kind. Being nice. She understood he hadn’t had a whole lot of that in his life. But that was no excuse. It was time he learned.
“Shit.” He stared at Dani’s retreating back as she took the stairs. He’d certainly pissed her off and only now realized how he had offended her about helping people. That was what she did at the center. Here he had this opportunity, and instead of appreciating what he had, he was getting his back up at the thought of the least bit of charity. Like when she’d bring him a cup of coffee. Which was often. Since when had that become a charity thing? He felt like a heel. At the same time, some residual anger about Cain still ran through him. He’d also overdone it in the pool, and he knew therapy would be a bitch today.
But it wasn’t—it was much worse.
As if understanding how emotionally messed up he was today, the physiotherapist focused those negative energies of Aaron’s into working on his back with some weight-lifting exercises. There’d been such strong promise lately as Aaron could feel his strength building up, slowly but surely. The pain had even eased, but right now, Shane was all about getting down to the meat and working those muscles hard. Then the physiotherapist said something magical.
“If you keep up progress like this, you may not need that surgery at all.”
Aaron turned to stare at Shane. “It’s a possibility?” He would do anything to avoid that surgery.
“We weren’t sure you’d need the fifth surgery when you got here, and now that your muscles are strengthening and building up, there’s a good chance we can fix this without more invasive cutting and stitching,” he said.
Aaron bowed his head for a moment, giving silent thanks for this.
Then he went at it hard again.
If he had any hope of getting back to where he was before—strong, agile and fit for duty—even though, with the missing leg, the military would never accept him now, he would still do his damnedest.
He wouldn’t fail because of a lack of effort.
When the session was done, he stood, wavering on his foot, sweat dripping off his face, goose bumps popping up all over from the supreme sense of power rippling through him.
“Massage time. You need a heavy, deep one today.”
“I do. I can feel the muscles trying to knot.”
“Well, we’re not letting them. Let’s go.”
They moved over to the table where Aaron took off his shirt and wiped the sweat from his body. The window was open, letting in a cool breeze. The therapist had left, and Aaron knew Chuck would be in soon. He was a hell of a masseur, and he and Shane took turns at the different shifts.
Stripping down to his boxers, he rolled over and let his body flop on the long bench. Even that hurt like shit. He had overdone it.
But if it got him back to health—without more surgeries—then it was all worth it.
Chuck came in a few minutes later and worked Aaron’s muscles deeply, kneading to release the tension and knots. The worst massage session ever. By the time Chuck was done, Aaron wanted to cry with relief.
“Sauna, then shower. Let those muscles rest. We’ll skip this afternoon’s physio.”
Chuck walked to the door and then turned back. “Next time you need to work off some frustration, ease up before you trash yourself. We can’t have you slowing your progress with an injury.”
Injury. Odd, Aaron hadn’t even considered that. If a pulled muscle could easily sideline him, or much worse, if that muscle was in his back …
For the first time he understood how stupid his frantic swimming session this morning had been. He’d wanted to release that building rage, but he hadn’t thought it out.
As someone … maybe Dani … had said, it was all about balance.
Chapter 14
Good thing she had a ton of work to keep the niggle of fear and resentment at bay. She knew how detrimental negative thinking was. The rules were no different for herself than anyone else here.
“Dani?”
She looked up to see Stan in the doorway, a hesitant smile on his face.
“What’s up?”
“I wondered … if you have a moment, could we talk?”
“Sure.” She waved at the chair opposite her desk.
He closed the door. “I know there are programs for those who don’t have enough money to come here, and you tap into those all the time, but do you know of any for retraining some of the men?”
She frowned, her mind running across the various programs. “A lot of grant money is available, but each has a set of criteria to be met in order to apply. If they are veterans, some money is there, but they’d have to go through their own channels for that.”
“Right.” He looked out the window. “I was thinking about Aaron.”
“Oh,” she said in surprise. “Is this something he’s been talking to you about?”
“He always planned to go to vet school, but after his mother died, he ended up in the military. Vet school would be four more years.”
“He is a veteran, so money could very well be there for him to achieve those goals,” she said. “But it’s not that easy to get into the program, is it?”
“He does need references and preferably some work experience, but no reason he can’t do it.” Stan shrugged. “He’s a young man, and this would give him a wonderful future, particularly as it was his original passion.”
“What is it you want me to do?”
Stan stared at her. “I can see this relationship developing between you two. Has he mentioned anything about his future?”
“Not really.” She shook her head again. “I don’t think he can see that far ahead yet. He’s waiting on a bigger issue to be resolved first. In a way he’s completely blocked until it is.”
“Oh.”
“And again why?”
“Well, I offered him some hands-on experience helping me here. And, since I’m on the board, I wondered about writing a recommendation for him.”