Getting Out

by Afton Brinkman

  “Well, out with it, what do you want Jaimie?” Her famous pout appeared on her face. She always pulled it out when she wanted to get her way, it worked on her parents, Zach, on teachers and most other people, but I knew it all too well and I wasn’t falling for it. “I don’t have time for your crap right now Jaimie, I am waiting for Ashton…”

  “I’m pregnant.”

  Now it was my turn to stand there and stare at her. “Why are you telling me this?” I asked.

  She rolled her eyes at me. “Because it’s yours.”

  No, there is no way. “I don’t believe you.”

  “It’s true, it happened that night at Cams. I haven’t been with anyone else.”

  I shook my head back and forth and lowered my voice. “I find that really hard to believe and plus I saw the condom wrappers. We were safe, we always were.”

  She shrugged her shoulders. “Well I guess one didn’t work.”

  I ran my hand through my hair, let out a sigh and continued to shake my head. “This can’t be happening, I don’t want this Jaimie.”

  She narrowed her eyes and stepped closer to me. “Well that doesn’t really matter, it’s done and whether you like it or not you are stuck with me and this baby so I suggest you get on board real quick. First things first, you need to end things with Ashton. You and I are going to be together and raise our baby.”

  I felt like I was going to be sick. It was in that moment that I knew without a doubt that I was really starting to hate Jaimie. “I can’t deal with this right now, I got to go.” What had I done? I was supposed to be becoming a better person this year and when I found Ashton I was convinced I was on the right path. We were going to graduate and I was going to play hockey while she attended college. We were going to live together and everything was going to be great. But as I stood there and looked at Jaimie’s smug face I saw the perfect picture of Ashton and my future crumbling and fading away with every second that ticked by. It was over, Ashton would never forgive me for this and I didn’t want her to. She always thought I deserved better but it was really her who deserved better someone that would never do something like this to her. I made my bed, now I guess I have to sleep in it, but I will be damned if it’s with Jaimie. I will do the right thing and raise my kid… if it is mine. I would be asking for a paternity test that’s for sure.

  I drove straight to Cam’s house and went inside without even knocking. He was sitting on the couch with a beer in one hand and a bag of potato chips in the other, watching Sports Center. I went to the freezer, grabbed some ice, two glasses, and a large bottle of liquor and slumped on the couch next to him. He didn’t say anything at first, just watched me fill the glasses and hand one to him.

  “Cheers! My life is officially over and I thought I should celebrate with the fucker that had a hand in it.” I clinked my glass with his and downed the entire contents.

  I was pouring another when he spoke. “Alright Ingram, what did I do this time?” He took a sip from his glass and leaned up putting his arms on his thighs and waited for my answer.

  “Jaimie is pregnant.”

  He frowned while snorting. “That’s not a big surprise, the girl sleeps with everyone, but why would you be all upset about that, you have Ashton.” Cam was not the brightest crayon in the box.

  “You don’t know why that would make me upset? Okay, let me spell it out for you, dumbass.” I raised up from the couch and towered over him, I wasn’t going to hit him I just needed his full attention. “Jaimie is pregnant and she says it’s mine, that it happened the night of your party and Ashton is never going to want anything to do with me ever again, get it?!” I was raising my voice and on the verge of putting my fist threw the wall or maybe my head, I wasn’t sure.

  “Dude calm down.”

  “Don’t tell me to calm down when my entire life is ruined, if I lose her I lose everything.”

  “She’s just a girl man there are plenty of other’s…”

  “Don’t.”

  “All I am saying is that you are acting like a pus...” I grabbed him by the collar and pulled him up close to my face.

  “Don’t tell me I am acting like a pussy, just because you’re a loser who has never had anything important in his life.” I threw him back on the couch. “You and me, we are done Cam.” I began to walk to his front door.

  “Charlie, come on, I will figure a way to help you just give me a couple days, man. I will think of something. Come on, you’re my only real friend.”

  I didn’t want to hear any of it. I flipped him the bird before exiting, getting into my truck and driving away.

  CHARLIE BEING suspended for a week meant that I had to brave the halls at school alone. Yeah I had Tess and Noah but being without Charlie left me feeling a vulnerability I wasn’t used to anymore. I felt like I was a sitting duck and that at any moment something bad was going to jump out and get me. It also meant he wasn’t allowed to play hockey. He still went to all the practices but for the games, he had to sit on the bench and it didn’t take a genius to see that he hated every second of it.

  After our little Valentine’s Day get away to the lake house, Charlie and I had been floating on a cloud. I wore my promise ring every day and often found him playing with it while he held my hand or bringing it up to his lips and kissing it. It meant a lot to me that he was taking it so serious but at the same time I couldn’t shake the feeling that there was some other motive behind it. Even though I wore the ring on my right hand, rumors flew around about how Charlie had proposed to me on Valentine’s Day and that we were going to run off and elope. I had to laugh, if only things were that simple.

  I was sitting on the floor, leaning against my locker, texting Charlie during lunch, when Noah came and plopped down next to me. He didn’t say anything, just gave me a smile and pulled out his sketchbook and started doodling. That’s why I really liked being around Noah, we could just be. We didn’t need to talk, just sitting next to each other was enough most of the time. When I didn’t get a response from Charlie, I sighed and put my phone away. Leaning my head on Noah‘s shoulder, I looked at his drawing.

  “You good?” He asked before placing a small kiss to my head. He did that sometimes and while I knew I shouldn’t, I secretly liked the small affections he gave me. I didn’t want to lead him on or hurt him but at the same time I felt like I needed it from him. They made me feel better, nothing like how Charlie made me feel, it was just a feeling of one friend genuinely caring for the other.

  “I’m good.”

  Tess showed up a little while later and sat on the other side of the hallway. She took her glasses off and began to clean them with a cloth she pulled from her purse. “So who’s down to play a little hooky?”

  Noah stopped his pencil strokes and we both peered at her. “You can’t afford to play hooky Tess, your grades are in the toilet and if you get one more demerit at the dorms, they are going to call your parents.”

  She frowned and placed her glasses back on her face. “Like I care.” She was in a mood today, that was for sure. She continued to look at us with a bored expression. Noah put his things back into his back pack and looked down at me with a small smile.

  “What do you think Ash? Feel like ditching?”

  I looked at both my friends and shrugged my shoulders. “Yeah sure why not.”

  Tess of course wanted to shop so we ended up going to the mall in Portland. Tess shopped while Noah and I followed behind her, laughing at how excited she got when she spotted a new sale. I had wandered into a small bookstore and tried to call Charlie again-still no answer. I was beginning to think he was avoiding me. Noah came up from behind me and grabbed my shoulders scaring the shit out of me. He laughed and dodged my playful punches. We were both laughing and getting dirty looks from the shop owner so we got out of there and took our shenanigans elsewhere. I was just about to go for the kill and pinch his sides when my eyes landed on Jaimie and her friends. They were standing outside of a store that had a giant display case o
f baby clothes. Jaimie was holding up one of the items while the other girls cooed and made a big deal about how cute it all was. I wondered why she would be at a baby store, maybe she knew someone that was going to have a baby and she was buying them a gift… oh no is that why Tess was so moody lately? Was she and Zach pregnant? I needed to find out. I left in the direction of the store Noah and I had last seen her. She was still there looking through the racks of clothes while she held a few that she had already chosen. I marched right up to her and got straight to the point. “I thought you were on birth control, did you forget to take your pill or something?”

  Her eyes left the rack of clothes and found mine. “What the hell are you talking about?”

  “I just saw Jaimie, she was standing outside of a baby store looking at stuff. Is she buying you a gift?” I was being blunt but I needed to know.

  “I am not pregnant. In fact, Zach and I have not had sex in a while.”

  I searched her face-she was telling me the truth. “Well, I just thought, because you been so moody that…”

  She began to laugh. I mean really laugh, she bent at the waist and put her head down, she was laughing so hard. “I have been moody? As opposed to my cheery personality any other day? I can’t believe you thought I was pregnant I mean I was the one that took you to get on birth control remember.”

  She did. She made the appointment for me with the doctor that she saw. She went with me. She even helped me choose what method to use. I should have known better. But if it wasn’t for Tess and Zach, then why was Jaimie baby shopping with her friends? Tess purchased her items and threw her small arm around me.

  “Come on weirdo, let’s go find our boy and grab something to eat. Shopping always makes me hungry.”

  I HAD been avoiding Ashton’s calls all day. Every time I saw her beautiful face light up on the screen, it hurt me to press the ignore button. But I had to focus on what I was doing before I ran out of time. I had a second meeting with Coach Taylor, I needed to explain to him why I had been suspended and why I was still a good candidate to have on his team. The meeting went well and he couldn’t officially say it but he pretty much said I would make a great addition to the team and to come see him as soon as I graduated. Next thing I had to do was go look at this apartment I had called. It was close to the arena where I would be playing and Ashton’s commute to the college was doable. The apartment was small but we didn’t need much, the rent was in our price range with everything included. I could see us living here and starting the next chapter of our lives together. The landlord was doing some renovations so the place wouldn’t be ready until June which was perfect. Maybe we could do a little traveling or stay at the lake house before we moved in after graduation. She loved going to the lake house. I told the lady that I would take it and she said she would call me when it was all done and that I could sign the lease. Everything was going to work out and I wasn’t going to let Jaimie and one giant mistake take it away from me.

  TESS AND Noah made the remainder of Charlie’s suspension fly by and I was beyond grateful, I was ready to have him back with me again. Dee had been calling and giving me more and more updates on my folks. I guess after they came here, and the whole incident that went down they had warrants out for their arrests now and were hiding out. If they ever came back to town, she would be sure to let me know. I didn’t really care where the hell they were as long as they left me alone.

  Charlie had picked me up for school on his first day back. I got into the truck and scooted over to the familiar spot that had become mine this past year and kissed my boyfriend on the lips. It was crazy to think how far we had come since the beginning of the year. When I first arrived, I was a scared, damaged girl who wanted nothing but to graduate and possibly start over from the wreck of my past. Now, here I was with two new best friends and a boyfriend I couldn’t live without. I had a bright future to look forward to and I was so excited that Charlie would be there every step of the way. He held my hand the whole way and when we got to school he never let go of my hand.

  “You know I am going to need my hand to go to class.” He was standing outside my first period and I could tell that there was something wrong, he had this haunted look in his eyes that I couldn’t ignore. “Charlie what’s wrong?”

  “Nothing, I just-I just love you. I will see you after class.” With that, he kissed my hand, reluctantly let it go and walked away. The rest of the school day passed by like usual, when lunch rolled around I found Tess and Noah sitting together but Charlie and Zach weren’t around. I shrugged it off thinking maybe it was hockey stuff. We wandered around the halls, talking for a while before, we walked into the hallway that led to the gym. Inside, I found Jaimie, Zach and Charlie, and they looked like they were having a heated discussion. Jaimie had her arms crossed over her chest; the veins in Zach’s neck were popping out like he was about to explode, and Charlie had his hands on his hips and was looking at the ground. We approached them slowly when he finally looked up, his eyes looked even more haunted then before and I knew something was seriously wrong.

  “Charlie what’s going on?”

  “This has nothing to do with you.”

  Jaimie’s words caught me a bit off guard but I was going to stand my ground this time. “If it has something to do with Charlie then it has something to do with me.” I stepped closer to Charlie’s side and grabbed hold of his arm. He wasn’t tense, he was just there breathing in and out. He looked defeated.

  Jaimie’s eyes landed on my hands touching Charlie and her lips curled into a half smile half snarl. “You want to tell her now Charlie or should I?”

  “Shut up Jaimie.” Charlie’s voice was low but not threatening.

  “No she needs to hear it and I gave you plenty of time and you didn’t do it.”

  Charlie pulled me into a hug so tight that I thought he might break me. He was breathing heavy and really starting to scare me. “I love you so much… I am so sorry… so fucking sorry.” Was all he kept saying over, and over again. Oh god what has he done.

  “I’m pregnant” Jaimie announced proudly. “And Charlie’s the father but I am sure you already get that.”

  “What?” Tess and Noah said behind me in unison. God please don’t let this be happening. Charlie still had his death grip on me but I pushed back just enough so I could see his face. I needed to see the truth that I knew would be painted all over his handsome features. His eyes were glistening like he was holding back tears, he looked destroyed. But I didn’t feel sorry for him, in fact I couldn’t stand the sight of him.

  “Let me go.” I tried to wiggle out of his grip but that just made his arms constrict around me even more, like a python trying to suffocate its prey.

  “No baby, please, we don’t even know if it’s mine. It might not be.”

  I gave him a hard push and he finally released me. “But there’s a chance that it might be yours?” I asked, my voice raising in volume. “That means you cheated on me pretty recently right Charlie?” The question was laced with pain and my voice cracked as I tried to choke back my emotions.

  “I-I don’t know what happened one minute I was passed out drunk in Cam’s guest room and the next thing I knew, I was waking up and she was there and I…”

  “Stop talking about my sister like she was some little tramp who seduced you. You knew what you were doing, you do it to all the girls Charlie, so don’t play the victim just because your dick got you in trouble this time,” Zach said. He was pissed, I get that, but he was completely pledging loyalty to his sister, like she was an innocent little angel, which couldn’t be further from the truth.

  “I think I am going to be sick.” I found the nearest trash can and emptied the contents of my stomach into it.

  Tess rubbed my back for a moment and held my hair out of my face before she stepped away from me, facing the others. “No offense, but I think we all know Jaimie sleeps around, I mean it probably isn’t Charlie’s.” Tess’s bluntness made everyone pause and look at her. Za
ch glared at his girlfriend.

  “Excuse me?” Jaimie said obviously offended. “You are screwing my brother, aren’t you supposed to be on my side here?” Tess snorted.

  “On your side? Please. The only person whose side I am on in this situation is Ashton’s. In fact, she is the only one here who hasn’t cheated and fucked up, so you all can kiss my ass.” She spoke the truth and Noah agreed with a nod of his head.

  “I need to get out of here.” I began to walk away from the group of people that just made my entire world crumble to the ground. I needed to get out. Charlie reached for me but again, I tugged myself out and away from his hold. How dare he try and touch me after he had just ripped my heart out of my chest. I felt all my anger and hurt rise to the surface and before I could stop myself, I raised my hand and slapped Charlie across the face. It made a loud noise but he didn’t even flinch, it was like he welcomed the physical pain because it was better than the emotional. I knew that all too well. We didn’t say anything, just stared at each other with sad and angry eyes.

  “Don’t be too sad Ashton, now that Charlie is mine, you can go back to daddy fucking.” I didn’t have time to register anything, all I saw was a blur of red hair as Tess tackled Jaimie to the ground. Jaimie was thicker and taller but Tess was wiry and fast. She sat on top of Jaimie and slapped her face hard one time before Zach lifted a still fighting Tess off of his sister. “You crazy bitch,” Jaimie yelled as she clasped her injured cheek with one hand. Zach put Tess down and went to the aid of his sister, kneeling down beside her. Charlie had backed away from the chaos but his eyes were ablaze on me. Noah had come to my side and was now holding me in his arms while a couple stray tears had escaped my eyes without me even knowing it. : Tess and Jaimie taken straight to the principal’s office and the rest of us were sent home. My phone rang for the remainder of the day, all calls from Charlie. I shut my cell off.